awww come on lighten up

The messages you are viewing are archived/old.
To view latest messages and participate in discussions, select the boards given in left menu

Why did the chicken cross the road?

DR. PHIL:

The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on 'THIS' side of the road before it goes after the problem on the 'OTHER SIDE' of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his 'CURRENT' problems before adding 'NEW' problems.

OPRAH:

Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

GEORGE W. BUSH:

We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

COLIN POWELL:

Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road...

ANDERSON COOPER - CNN:

We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

JOHN KERRY:

Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it!

It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

BARACK OBAMA:

The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a CHANGE! The chicken wanted CHANGE!

JOHN MC CAIN:

My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

HILLARY CLINTON:

When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure -- right from Day One! -- that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me.......

NANCY GRACE:

That chicken crossed the road because he's GUILTY! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN:

To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

MARTHA STEWART:

No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

DR SEUSS:

Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY:

To die in the rain. Alone.

GRANDPA:

In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS:

Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its life long dream of crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE:

It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

JOHN LENNON:

Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.

BILL GATES:

I have just released eChicken2007, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your check book. Internet Explorer is an integral part of the Chicken. This new platform is much more stable and will never cra...#@&&^(C% .........

reboot.

ALBERT EINSTEIN:

Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

BILL CLINTON:

I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition of chicken?

AL GORE:

I invented the chicken!

COLONEL SANDERS:

Did I miss one?

DICK CHENEY:

Where's my gun?

AL SHARPTON:

Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.

I'm not naive enough to think that politicians are honest. I mean....if they were honest...they would stop playing the blame game in this economic crisis and actually take responsibility for their own greedy actions....particularly Dodd and Frank who I personally think should be put in separate jail cells with a large sweaty cell mate who is looking for some loving....if ya know what I mean. LOL!

Neither candidate, IMO, has a great plan to help our economy. I have to look at other issues like abortion, gun control, etc. There are a lot more things that I disagree with that Obama supports. Also, when it comes to making a living, my husband runs a car dealership and that business is hurting big time. He is running a skeleton crew, works long hours to cover for the lack of employees, and is happy to just break even. The other dealerships in his group are all talking about who they can fire if things continue to get worse to save the dealerships money. Under Obama's plans....the dealerships will suffer more and my husband and I can't afford for it to get much worse. Just another example of a small business that will have its taxes raised and will actually hurt it rather than help it which will equal loss of more jobs.

I have so many issues right now with government. The spending is WAY out of control. I'm realistic enough to know that under both Obama and McCain's plans that they BOTH will add to the national deficit and that IS A FACT. I'm just tired of government having control of so much and that is another reason why I'm voting McCain. I don't want a bigger government like Obama wants. Government has screwed up enough for us as it is....I don't want it bigger.

I also feel that in the matter of national security that I feel more comfortable with McCain. He has the military experience and he has been there, suffered through war, etc. I also think that other countries know this about McCain and would think real hard before they actually did something to us knowing that McCain has that background. Obama, on the other hand has never been tested and we could very well be hit with something just to see how he would handle it. Would he buckle and do nothing and let them bully us or would he hit them back? His own running mate said he would be tested.

In all honesty, Obama has just never run anything. He was a community organizer and the housing in his district were so bad that people didn't have heat during the winter. He has a little over 140 days in the senate and that is it. I want more experience. Palin doesn't have much experience either but at least she has run a whole state and made executive decision in running that state. Her approval rating is still one of the highest if not highest in the country. Is she perfect? No...of course not. But she is running for VP and not pres. Obama is running for pres with no experience and that doesn't settle well with me in addition to all the other things I've mentioned before as well as the issues with Wright, Rezko, Ayers, Farrakhan, etc.

Also, the fact that Obama has supported more earmarks and pork in his four years in the senate than McCain has his whole political career.....to me that says a heck of a lot about the type of pres Obama will be. He will do nothing but spend spend spend on special interest groups and government assisted programs that we cannot possibly afford.

After the election it was voted that our town did not want to pay taxes to increase the police force or fire department (we have a population of about 25,000 here). Right now there are maybe 3 to 5 officers or so. Last night as we were watching TV we could hear a police siren and my husband said. "Didn't you hear, because nobody wants to pay any more taxes for police they have now designated one house that every half hour or so they play the recording of a police siren going by so that way people will think we actually have police here".

Christian...don't be hatin! yes as a matter of fact I DO know what an ARM is and was smart enough NOT to get one thank you. It still goes back to my original thought that one that does not make much money each month should not be looking at houses in the 300 to 400,000 range to begin with. And if they were silly enough as to believe that they even COULD afford that well, that is their own fault. Predatory lending falls under the greed catagory as well. Why is it that when one has a differing opinion they are called uneducated, misinformed etc. point and counterpoint. I cannot believe adults cannot have an intelligent argument without resorting to school yard tactics.

Let's all just give him a free pass and not hold him accountable for the stupid crap he signs while in office because he is black. boohoo! Cry me a river. You can't criticize him because that is racist. You can't disagree with him because that is racist.

Personally....I think this whole "stimulus" package is stupid and therefore anyone who wrote it, voted for it, or signed the bill, IMO, is as dumb as monkey. That is my take on the cartoon. obama's stupidity has nothing to do with the fact he is black. It is the fact that once again our government is spending billions of dollars that we don't have for something that will not work. Doesn't take a lot of brains to fling poo like monkeys do and as far as I"m concerned this bill is nothing but the government flinging poo at us.