April Fools humor...

Deleted by Moderator - very inappropriate.

• April Fools humor... - sm.

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Are those who actually think the UN is worth more than (insert your choice of naughty words here).  Many Americans often forget that we're picking up the tab for that trainwreck, too.  I could fill up this forum with posts about them over the years and the huge $ grab it is.

But the Dems love to pay taxes, so my solution is to just raise their taxes and let the rest of us just "be."

Drives. Me. Crazy.

http://exposingliberallies.blogspot.com/2008/10/obama-has-played-voters-for-fools.html 

To think that conservatives have viewed Bill and Hillary Clinton as unethical politicians who would do anything to get elected. When we are as disgusted as we think we possibly can be, on to the political stage steps Barack Obama. The senator from Illinois makes Bill and Hillary look “not quite so bad”.
     Though they enjoyed paling around with Yasser Arafat, we didn’t have the all-consuming fear that they would completely sell-out Israel, nor did we have to worry about them supporting infanticide, though they saw nothing wrong with partial-birth abortion.
     Yes, Obama keeps his pants on when away from his “bitter-half,“ Michelle, but that’s not much comfort when he has campaigned for Kenyan Prime Minister Raila Odinga who made a pact with Kenyan Muslims to institute Sharia law.
http://exposingliberallies.blogspot.com/2008/10/obama-funds-odinga-who-promises-sharia.html
     Thomas Sowell has written an article in National Review describing how Obama has played the American people for fools.
http://article.nationalreview.com/?q=ZTQ5YTM3M2UzMjY3N2M3YWRiMDI0NzNmMTNhNjJlNTc=

     “Although Senator Barack Obama has been allied with a succession of far-Left individuals over the years, that is only half the story. There are, after all, some honest and decent people on the Left. But these have not been the ones that Obama has been allied with — allied, not merely ‘associated’ with.
     ACORN is not just an organization on the left. In addition to the voter frauds that ACORN has been involved in over the years, it is an organization with a history of thuggery, including going to bankers’ homes to harass them and their families, in order to force banks to lend to people with low credit ratings.
     Nor was Barack Obama’s relationship with ACORN just a matter of once being their attorney long ago. More recently, he has directed hundreds of thousands of dollars their way. Money talks — and what it says is more important than a politician’s rhetoric in an election year.
     Jeremiah Wright and Michael Pfleger are not just people with left-wing opinions. They are reckless demagogues preaching hatred of the lowest sort — and both are recipients of money from Obama.
     Bill Ayers is not just ‘an education professor’ who has some left-wing views. He is a confessed and unrepentant terrorist, who more recently has put his message of resentment into the schools — an effort using money from a foundation that Obama headed.
     Nor has the help all been one way. During the last debate between John McCain and Barack Obama, Senator McCain mentioned that Sen. Obama’s political campaign began in Bill Ayers’s home. Obama immediately denied it and McCain had no real follow-up.
     It was not this year’s political campaign that Obama began in Bill Ayers’s home but an earlier campaign for the Illinois state legislature. Barack Obama can match Bill Clinton in slickness at parsing words to evade accusations.
     That is one way to get to the White House. But slickness with words is not going to help a president deal with either domestic economic crises or the looming dangers of a nuclear Iran.
     People who think that talking points on this or that problem constitute ‘the real issues’ that we should be talking about, instead of Obama’s track record, ignore a very fundamental fact about representative government.
     Representative government exists, in the first place, because we the voters cannot possibly have all the information necessary to make rational decisions on all the things that the government does. We cannot rule through polls or referendums. We must trust someone to represent us, especially as President of the United States.
     Once we recognize this basic fact of representative government, then the question of how trustworthy a candidate is becomes a more urgent question than any of the so-called ‘real issues.’
     A candidate who spends two decades promoting polarization and then runs as a healer and uniter, rather than a divider, forfeits all trust by that fact alone.
     If Ronald Reagan had attempted to run for president of the United States as a liberal, the media would have been all over him. His support for Barry Goldwater would have been in the headlines and in editorial denunciations across the country.
     No way would he have been able to get away with using soothing words to suggest that he and Barry Goldwater were like ships that passed in the night.
     If Barack Obama had run as what he has always been, rather than as what he has never been, then we could simply cast our votes based on whether or not we agree with what he has always stood for.
     Some people take solace from the fact that Senator Obama has verbally shifted position on some issues, like drilling for oil or gun control, since this is supposed to show that he is ‘pragmatic’ rather than ideological.
     But political zigzags show no such moderation as some seem to assume. Lenin zigzagged and so did Hitler. Zigzags may show no more than that someone is playing the public for fools.
     Some people who see the fraud in what Obama is saying are amazed that others do not. But Obama knows what con men have long known, that their job is not to convince skeptics but to enable the gullible to continue to believe what they want to believe. He does that very well.”

     Right on, brother! Right on! It’s refreshing to see a black conservative who stands on principle and doesn’t support Obama just because of his dark pigment. I’m speaking of you, General Powell.

Posted by Debra Moore at 4:00 PM

Not ONE of the links you posted worked.

Not ONE!!

But ha, ha!  Ya made me look!

Decided to post this because it fits so much to today.  Same old media tactics too. 

A Time to Break Silence

By Rev. Martin Luther King

By 1967, King had become the country's most prominent opponent of the Vietnam War, and a staunch critic of overall U.S. foreign policy, which he deemed militaristic. In his Beyond Vietnam speech delivered at New York's Riverside Church on April 4, 1967 -- a year to the day before he was murdered -- King called the United States the greatest purveyor of violence in the world today.

Time magazine called the speech demagogic slander that sounded like a script for Radio Hanoi, and the Washington Post declared that King had diminished his usefulness to his cause, his country, his people.

A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him.

He asked, What are all those clocks?
 
St. Peter answered,Those are Lie-Clocks.
 
Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on
your clock will move.

Oh, said the man, whose clock is that?

That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie.

Incredible, said the man. And whose clock is that one?

St. Peter responded, That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire
life.

Where's Bush's clock? asked the man.

Bush's clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan.

And you must have missed that on a daily basis, the far left have developed a gang mentality where all the usual rules have been thrown aside.  You aren't debating here, you realize?  I could go on, but I won't.  There is no point. 

Is this an example of conservative humor (since the conservative talk show below wants to be the first to air it)?  Apparently (but not surprisingly), Michele Malkin is a huge fan and wants this song recorded.  I agree with his First Amendment rights and think he should be allowed to record it, regardless of how obscene the lyrics are.  I can't post the lyrics here because of the profanity, but they can be found at http://www.blackfive.net/main/2006/06/hadji_girl.html

Sorry, but I don't get the *joke*.  

http://apnews.myway.com/article/20060704/D8IKSGI80.html

Jul 3, 9:44 PM (ET)

RALEIGH, N.C. (AP) - A Marine who wrote and performed a song about killing members of an Iraqi family has temporarily shelved the tune, a record producer said Monday.

We're wanting to record and produce it, Mosher said. I think it tells a great story.

President Bush was out, riding his bicycle, hit a rock, flew off his bicycle, over a bridge and landed in a lake where three little boys were fishing. 

They rushed to save him, and the president was so grateful, he told them they could have anything they wanted in return for saving his life.

The first little boy wanted a trip to Disney World.  The president said:  No problem.  Consider it done.  I'll fly you there myself on Air Force One.

The second little boy asked for a new pair of Nike Air Jordans.  The president said:  No problem.  I'll even see to it that Michael Jordan personally autographs them for you.

The third little boy asked for a really fast wheelchair with a big screen TV in front of it and surround sound stereo.  The president said:  Well, okay, but, son, you don't need a wheelchair.

The little boy said:  I don't now, but I will as soon as my dad finds out I saved your butt.

He falls off bikes, gets black eyes from pretzels, and nearly flattens his staff with a tractor -- Dubya's middle name should be Clouseau.  Wonder if he went to strongarm Caterpillar over their recent acknowledgement of global warming. 

The White House announced its visit to a Caterpillar factory in East Peoria, Illinois, yesterday, where President George W. Bush advanced his case for expanding free trade negotiations. But it didn't detail the President's clumsy driving of a giant D-10 tractor that sent the White House press corps and presidential staff scrambling, which was reported at a Newsweek blog.

At The Gaggle, Newsweek reporter Holly Bailey writes that the president clambered into the driver's seat of Caterpillar's giant D10 tractor. I would suggest moving back...I'm about to crank this sucker up, she reports him saying.

But as White House staff started to move the press corps back, the situation became more chaotic. Bailey writes that the tractor lurched forward and White House staff too were forced to scramble for safety. Get out of the way! a news photographer yelled. I think he might run us over!

Bush chuckled about the incident, and referenced driving the tractor during his speech, saying I'm impressed by a culture of excellence and accomplishment that is the spirit of Caterpillar. I also appreciate the chance to drive a D10. If you've never driven a D10 -- (laughter) -- it's a cool experience. (Laughter), according to the White House website.

Bailey looked less fondly upon Bush's test drive of the D-10. Yeah, almost as much fun as seeing your life flash before your eyes, she wrote in response to the president's remark about his cool experience.

 Subject: Will Obama get Osama, or will Osama get Obama?
 
 
After numerous rounds of 'We don't even know if Osama is still 
alive', Barrack Hussein Obama has now been telling everyone he will 
capture Osama Bin Laden when elected.

So, Osama himself decided to send Barrack Hussein Obama a letter in 
his own handwriting to let him know he was still in the game.

Obama opened the letter and it contained a single line of coded
message:

370H-SSV-0773H

Obama was baffled, so he e-mailed it to Howard Dean.

Dean and the DNC and his aides had no clue either, so they sent it 
to Joe Biden.

Joe Biden could not solve so it was sent to the FBI and the CIA.

Eventually they asked John McCain and his Staff to look at it.

And within minutes McCain's Staff e-mailed Obama with this reply:

'Tell Obama he's holding the message upside down'.

http://www.theonion.com/content/video/obama_win_causes_obsessive

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dzlIm_T8xjM&feature=channel

YOU MIGHT BE AN OBOT IF…

You’ve never paid any attention to politics until Obama ran for President, and now you’ve become a political expert by reading Huffington Post and/or Daily Kos.

You get called a Cheetoh a lot but you don’t know why.

You believe there are only about 200 PUMAs in the country.

You weep with joy while repeating the mantra “YES WE CAN!”

You think Hillary Clinton tried to “steal” the Democratic nomination.

You fly into a rage when anyone suggests Obama is unqualified for the presidency.

You’ve used the word “racist” more than any other word in the last year.

You’ve developed a keen interest in Hawaiian body surfing.

For the first time in your life, you are proud of your country, but only because it elected a black president.

You believe that with Obama as president, this is a New Age when all wars will end, everyone will be provided for, and you don’t have to worry about paying your mortgage anymore!

You think Obama is a Great Man because of his magnificent accomplishments … like getting elected, and uh, uh, uh…

You think all Hillary Clinton supporters are middle-aged lesbians (not that there’s anything… yada yada yada… )

You get a lump in your throat when you hear the words “President Obama.”

You get a lump in your pants when you see Michelle Obama.

You think Bill Ayers was a non-issue, and was done wrong by the evil media.

You plan to name your children Barack and Baracka.

You believe that saying his middle name is racist.

You think the political platform of “change” is original to Obama.

You believe PUMAs are Republicans pretending to be disaffected Democrats, kind of like Joe Lieberman.

YOU MIGHT BE AN OBOT IF…

You’ve never paid any attention to politics until Obama ran for President, and now you’ve become a political expert by reading Huffington Post and/or Daily Kos.

You get called a Cheetoh a lot but you don’t know why.

You believe there are only about 200 PUMAs in the country.

You weep with joy while repeating the mantra “YES WE CAN!”

You think Hillary Clinton tried to “steal” the Democratic nomination.

You fly into a rage when anyone suggests Obama is unqualified for the presidency.

You’ve used the word “racist” more than any other word in the last year.

You’ve developed a keen interest in Hawaiian body surfing.

For the first time in your life, you are proud of your country, but only because it elected a black president.

You believe that with Obama as president, this is a New Age when all wars will end, everyone will be provided for, and you don’t have to worry about paying your mortgage anymore!

You think Obama is a Great Man because of his magnificent accomplishments … like getting elected, and uh, uh, uh…

You think all Hillary Clinton supporters are middle-aged lesbians (not that there’s anything… yada yada yada… )

You get a lump in your throat when you hear the words “President Obama.”

You get a lump in your pants when you see Michelle Obama.

You think Bill Ayers was a non-issue, and was done wrong by the evil media.

You plan to name your children Barack and Baracka.

You believe that saying his middle name is racist.

You think the political platform of “change” is original to Obama.

You believe PUMAs are Republicans pretending to be disaffected Democrats, kind of like Joe Lieberman.

YOU MIGHT BE AN OBOT IF…

You’ve never paid any attention to politics until Obama ran for President, and now you’ve become a political expert by reading Huffington Post and/or Daily Kos.

You get called a Cheetoh a lot but you don’t know why.

You believe there are only about 200 PUMAs in the country.

You weep with joy while repeating the mantra “YES WE CAN!”

You think Hillary Clinton tried to “steal” the Democratic nomination.

You fly into a rage when anyone suggests Obama is unqualified for the presidency.

You’ve used the word “racist” more than any other word in the last year.

You’ve developed a keen interest in Hawaiian body surfing.

For the first time in your life, you are proud of your country, but only because it elected a black president.

You believe that with Obama as president, this is a New Age when all wars will end, everyone will be provided for, and you don’t have to worry about paying your mortgage anymore!

You think Obama is a Great Man because of his magnificent accomplishments … like getting elected, and uh, uh, uh…

You think all Hillary Clinton supporters are middle-aged lesbians (not that there’s anything… yada yada yada… )

You get a lump in your throat when you hear the words “President Obama.”

You get a lump in your pants when you see Michelle Obama.

You think Bill Ayers was a non-issue, and was done wrong by the evil media.

You plan to name your children Barack and Baracka.

You believe that saying his middle name is racist.

You think the political platform of “change” is original to Obama.

You believe PUMAs are Republicans pretending to be disaffected Democrats, kind of like Joe Lieberman.

The intent of the post was not to compare an embryo to a turkey, but rather simply a joke saying that she would take up one cause but not the other.  If you read the posts below you might understand the joke.

However, since you mentioned it, I'm sure I could make that comparrison.  Our ideas of when life begins are obviously not the same.

If you take every bit of humor or joke completely literally perhaps you have Asperger syndrome.  This is a high-functioning autism. 

Your inability to understand the irony behind jokes/humor must make you a very hard person to deal with on a personal level.  The world must seem to be a very cold and forbidding place for you.

There is no known cure for autism or Asperger syndrome.  There may, however, be a cure for someone who intentionally makes themselves appear stupid in order to put forth their own agenda.