yes, Happy Father's Day to all the dads out there! (nm)

• Happy Father's Day to ALL including...nm - ones who are both Dad & Mom!!!..nm
  • Thanks!...Mom & Dad for 6 years and counting! - NCMT
  • Thank you! - playing both mom and dad roles for 14 years
    • me too, for nearly 16 yrs....sm - ones who are both Dad & Mom!!!..sm
  • yes, Happy Father's Day to all the dads out there! (nm) - everydaymt

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If you have a SS# for the deadbeat, you should be able to give it to the courthouse and let them find him. If they won't do that, you can probably find them through one of the "find anybody anywhere" places.  It cost me $50 10 years ago to do that for my DIL's sister. She had his SS# and knew he moved  to WA state. It only took a few minutes to get results from that site. She took the info to the courthouse and she is now receiving support. They garnished his wages and threatened him with jail. We have a tough state law ...they will put out a warrant for their arrest and throw them in jail if they find them....but only if the CS is a few thousand $$. She was lucky. To this day, he is still paying and has learned his lesson.

My ex moved out of state back in the early 70s and the courthouse refused to do anything about it. At that time, there was no law and all they had to do was move out of state to get out of paying. Once I heard he was back, I slapped him with the petition again to the tune of $10,000 back support and a lousy $16 a week for a 16-yo. Never got the back support....so I feel for you. Good luck.

My father signed up there but they wanted him to pay $2000 for food. I think it was for some kind of power bar or granola bar and they wanted him to buy $2000 worth. He said he did not want to buy them but they charged his card the $2000 anyway. Needless to say, he immediately withdrew his membership.

He went to Weight Watchers and so far, so good.

was in many ways a man before his time... My parents' marriage started out very traditional with my dad earning all the money and my mother at home having and caring for the babies.  However, my dad was the type who LOVED babies and little ones and would come home and feed or sit up all night with a sick child.  Slowly, the tables began to turn.  He encouraged my mom to get an education and she eventually began working (as an MT I might add) when I was about 12 (I was the baby).  By the time I was 19 of 20 my father was laid off at age 58 and my mother had become a department supervisor and made all the money.  My mother had private accounts and actually taught my father to transcribe, which he did until he died about 12 years later.  He did the paperwork and billing and delivering too.  That made him feel useful.  He would shop and cook and do the laundry and have dinner ready for my mom when she got home from work.  Talk about a complete 180 degree in a marriage.  My father was not perfect, but he was steady and dependable and you always knew that he loved you.  My husband is very much the same.

***  I just knew someone would have to be negative.  Everyone, everywhere has something negative to say about most anything.  I, quite frankly, enjoy life.  Guess what?  I even laugh at "women" jokes!!!!  I know my father, who died 35 years ago, would have found this very funny.  My brother is laughing with me now.  My son, who is a Marine, will have to wait until his return home to see it but, unlike some people, he does have a sense of humor and will enjoy it as it was meant to be. 

Do you ever watch any comedies on television or anything like that??  It is quite common to see "man versus woman" schtick" (spelling?) all the time.  Seems it has not been banned due to "political incorrectness".  Anyway, I certainly did not mean to offend you; that I stated before I actually wrote the 15 pieces of advice.  Thank you. 

what are you going to do

He was extremely happy to be off the dialysis and looked quite a bit healthier for a span of time (kidneys do things the plastic tubing just can't), but he only lived an extra 3 years and had to take lots of antirejection meds in the meantime, was in and out of the hospital a lot.

I agree with the person who posted below about talking to a physician about the downsides. Find out exactly what quality of life most transplant recipients have and how many extra years most of them receive. This is a big decision. It will change your life and probably in ways you can't fathom yet.

Wish I could give you better answers. It's so hard to watch people we love suffer.

of my life.  He worked and worked and worked, and worked some more.  When he came home he sat, read the paper, watched TV and fell asleep in his recliner.  He NEVER told me he loved me until he was in advanced stages of Alzheimer's disease.   We did not get along at all and my mother always said we were so much alike that we clashed, but I don't agree with that at all.   My father was not a bad father, just wasn't a good one.   I am #4 out of 5 and I always felt I was the only one he didn't love, though I don't know he really knew how to love and probably did the best he knew how - wasn't good enough though. 

My DH on the other hand is everything my father wasn't.  

My father has been at a federal prison camp for a little over a year now.  He's been sent to a local hospital six times due to heart troubles.  Before going in he had two heart attacks, stents placed, treatment for prostate cancer.  He's now also having trouble with his kidneys.  We are at our wit's end trying to get him home on house arrest.  It was a money/bribery charge (federal).  No prior record.  Can any one PLEASE help? 

 thanks

nm

I, on the other hand, had my children in my mid to late 30's.  I'm 45 and have a 12 and 5 year old.  At 50, I'll have a teenager and another one who will be right behind him.  There is definitely something to be said for having your kids when you are younger, not to say I am not enjoying mine - I'll be pretty old when they are on their own.