teen problems
Posted By: ad on 2005-11-29
In Reply to: TEEN PROBLEMS - tia
i could have written this post myself. at least we have seen the boyfriend, still do not like him. if you talk to any parent of teenage girls this post could have been written by anybody. wish i had all boys also.
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TEEN PROBLEMS
I wish I had all boys! How do you deal with a teenage girl who continues to lie about everything. Sweet in your face one minute and the next thing you know it is all a lie. It is so devastating every time it happens. It breaks my heart. We have even tried counseling. This is a girl who has everything going for her. She's beautiful, talented beautiful voice (college scholarships), athletic and top student. She draws trashy boys like flies and tries to hide the relationship from us because she knows we will disapprove. Daddy teaches at the same high school so it is hard on them both. Him, because what she does reflects on him and the little respect he gets from his students and her, because I know it has to be hard having Daddy around all the time. But she has not earned our trust. There has been one incident after another for four years (She is a junior in high school). Just when we begin to trust just a little, we find something else. Last night while we were at a meeting, she had a "boyfriend" whom we do not approve of, come to our house. How she got her little brother to keep quiet I don't know but I will find out. (He is the worst secret keeper.)
My husband and I are struggling financially to provide the things she needs to further her talent and school activities and functions. The latest is giving up things we usually do for Christmas to buy her a used vehicle. Now, after this latest stunt I can't justify it or trust her enough to let her get into to go anywhere.
Thanks for letting me vent. Anyone have any advice?
To Tia on teen problems
I'm not sure why you think boys are easier. I have both and they all try to pull the same stunts.
Most are doing great but one in particular (a boy) could just as easily have been your daughter. Lie, lie, lie and he acts like we have stupid written on our foreheads or were never teens.
With the last "minor" accident, but the 4th one, the car is locked up tight and Lord, you'd think we were depriving him of food and water. Thank God he has never hurt anyone or himself but when you already have restrictions, (no use of cell phone, no more than 1 kid and only a sibling in the car)...well...you just can't justify letting your girlfriend drive the car home because you were feeling "kinda dizzy" ........He just does not get the drift of the need to call home for any reason that he can not handle, and especially if your "kinda dizzy" 56 miles from home when you were supposed to be right around the block ...
He's sulking, trying to make our lives miserable, disrupting the rest of the household, but I've now put a chart up and for every act of defiance, whining etc, another week gets added to the lack of wheels... took him a couple of hours and 4 more weeks tacked on to realize I mean business.
Christmas vacation is coming up and guess who will be w/o wheels during it
You have to realize that your not her friend and the decisions you make now on your expectations and her inability to follow them needs to be cleared up. Hang in there, they do eventually grow out of this stage...only to head into another one.
I have a teen son with acne, not bad and
not cystic. We've been to the dermatologist twice without success. He now uses a generic (Wal-Mart) version of Proactiv and it isn't 100%, but lots better. Accutane can cause you to be suicidal and to me the risks just are too great versus any possible benefit.
The blackheads can be handled with good hand washing, keep his hands off his face, washing his hair daily if it is oily like my son's, and washing his wash a couple of times a day. The white heads could be handled with a soft puffing, like those disposable pads that are on the market. There are antibiotics that might be helpful. There are lots of OTC products that might be a little pricey, but I would exhaust every possible option before trying Accutane. We have a local oral/maxillofacial surgeon that has a clinician in his office to help with skin problems and they sell products that are not prescription. I can't remember the name, but do a goggle search for acne products.
I worked as a teen..
and I think it's a good experience. My dad didn't want me to work, but I insisted because I wanted my own money.
Well, I never worked as a teen (more)
and I had next to no responsibilies, had a new car and a checking account that was always just magically filled with money. It was a huge disservice to me. No teen is going to turn down a life like that...they just don't know any better, but my life would have been much easier had I learned responsibility as a kid rather than struggling to do that as an adult.
My parents are wonderful people and did what they thought was best. I just wish they would have been a little "meaner."
I worked as a housekeeper as a teen.
It paid maybe $.20 more than minimum wage. I think you can make more than that as an MT, don't you? You just haven't found your fit yet. If housekeeping is something you really want to do, go for it. It was a really nasty job, though. I'd rather do transcription at home than clean up after a bunch of slobs. Oh, disgusting. And the things people would leave behind in their rooms.
I did not work as a teen as my parents would not let me - sm
I did look for work though and tried to get work locally (i.e. walk or ride bike) but there was not much around us and the 2 positions I tried for I did not get unfortunately. My mom refused to drive me anywhere (driven out by my 2 older brothers so I suffered), I bummed rides everywhere or rode my bike, but my 3 best friends either had a car or had one available to them so I got around okay, but was not allowed to work (only 1 of my friends worked but that was only because her father had a business he ran out of the house). So I tried to earn money where I could but it was few are far between, dog sitting, cutting neighbor's grass on a regular basis for $10 a pop every 2 weeks, the odd babysitting job (not a lot of little kids where I lived at the time), think I made about $25 a month in the summer months. I wish they had let me work while I was in school. I did work after I graduated though, my summer job (warehouse/front office gopher where my mom worked) before college was my supply money for college, and I work a few PT jobs during school as well, probably $50 a week but it helped. But YES teenagers should be allowed to work as long as their grades are good. We plan to have our 2 work at King's Dominion once they are old enough (only 14 miles away) for summer jobs, I might too, who knows!
Unless he is being interviewed by another teen (probably not), shorts are NOT appropriate. What is
x
I'm not "afraid" of Halloween, but I was never into it, either, except when a pre-teen. Jus
s
I hired a neighborhood teen (sm)
I had my children at home, and hired a responsible neighborhood teenager. I worked part-time during the day with the sitter and then a couple of hours in the evenings when my husband got home. This was much cheaper than day care plus I got to take breaks and see my child and if my children skinned a knee or were really upset, I could take a break and take care ofYou need a backup in case the sitter is unavailable. It worked really well for me. Even better if you know another mom nearby with a child your chid could play with. Don't be fooled though - it is challenging and you will be tired, but was worth it to me :-)
find a teen in your neighborhood to sit for a few hours (nm)
d
well, I am an adult with teen kids, so it's not too hard to
Help! Need teen halloween custome ideas?? anyone? nm
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Forgot to mention - I am an 80s Teen - younger than you! nm
x
It's not a fad. You need her doc to refer you to a therapist for her. Took my teen years to get
s
My pre-teen Halloween story - happened about
There were always literally hundreds of kids out in our neighborhood on Halloween. When I was about 12, I got a gray wig and messed up the hair, a rubber mask with a large nose and lots of wrinkles, wore an old long plaid robe tied at the waist and socks with open-toe bedroom slippers. So here I am, messy gray hair, ugly face, robe and slippers and walked with a limp down the dark street. Two men were waiting at the end of a driveway for their children. Here I come, limping by and one man pokes the other one in the side and says, "Hey, Jim. Is that your wife or mine?"
I will remember that for as long as I live.
For mom with teen girls, what type of dance classes sm
are appropriate for learning moves to try out for drill team? my daughter is 14 and has never been in any dance classes. i am puzzled by the jazz, hip/hop, etc. and have no clue where she needs to start. she wants to try out for the drill team next year. TIA!
This actually looks do-able. I haven't dieted since a teen. Hated obsessing about food.
dd
Teen son is on this and has an increased appetite, so he's putting on the pounds while his outloo
s
http://kidshealth.org/teen/your_mind/mental_health/cutting.html
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