has anyone had to cut out a toxic relative or best
Posted By: friend because they were affecting your life? on 2005-08-17
In Reply to:
Mine is my mother. She is an extremely angry woman, and I honestly think, her seeing me happy, makes her dislike me even more. When I go to visit, which is not often anymore, she sarcastically says "yay look whos here" and does not have anything nice to say to me. She is usually drunk or on drugs so she falls asleep when I try to talk to her, and she criticizes my every decision and points out the things about myself that I hate. One thing, is that i'm not good with people, and she has to remind me of this on a daily basis, like when I tell her i'm going to start school or take classes she will say "but youre not good with people, I bet youre nervous" or snide remarks to that effect. She criticizes how I look, how I do my hair, what I wear, just about everything. When I leave there, for the next couple of days, I feel very angry, my self esteem feels as low as it did when I was a kid, and i'm just sick. I know she is my "mother" but its affecting me so much that I think I would have a better life if I distanced myself and not let her be so involved where it would affect me. Wondering if anyone had to make this painful decision with someone close to them. I'm changing and she is stuck in this bitter hate the world phase, where she has always been. 
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Toxic mother
I had to distance myself from my mother too. Don't feel bad. Think of it as doing something nice for yourself.
Now that I have grown daughters I have a problem I don't know how to solve. I don't want to be negative or judgmental towards my children, but they dress in sloppy, slutty clothes and I overhead some people joking about them because of it. I want to tell them to be more presentable but I don't want it to sound like I'm criticizing them or rejecting them. What do I do?
toxic friends/relatives--ADMINISTRATOR PLEASE EXPLAIN
Mine is my mother. She is an extremely angry woman, and I honestly think, her seeing me happy, makes her dislike me even more. When I go to visit, which is not often anymore, she sarcastically says "yay look whos here" and does not have anything nice to say to me. She is usually drunk or on drugs so she falls asleep when I try to talk to her, and she criticizes my every decision and points out the things about myself that I hate. One thing, is that i'm not good with people, and she has to remind me of this on a daily basis, like when I tell her i'm going to start school or take classes she will say "but youre not good with people, I bet youre nervous" or snide remarks to that effect. She criticizes how I look, how I do my hair, what I wear, just about everything. When I leave there, for the next couple of days, I feel very angry, my self esteem feels as low as it did when I was a kid, and i'm just sick. I know she is my "mother" but its affecting me so much that I think I would have a better life if I distanced myself and not let her be so involved where it would affect me. Wondering if anyone had to make this painful decision with someone close to them. I'm changing and she is stuck in this bitter hate the world phase, where she has always been.
Also, be careful that little girl/parents don't throw something toxic in your yard sm
for the puppy too eat. Sad, but a lot of sickos out there.
relative
I was just trying to be a little understanding if I had a relative that was out of work or a teenager that was doing it, it might be understandable but someone that does is weekly like I said it is only fair to be reported. We all hate it when someone takes our jobs for "less pay" and that is what some of these people are doing it when they do it this way. They take the jobs from the law abiding, tax paying people who want to make a decent living and pay their taxes. It cannot be okay in one situation and not in another. We all want a "good deal" but when it happes to us we are the first to cry about it.
OK, I need help with THIS relative...
My nephew David (10 years younger) is Born Again and spends every Christmas going from relative to relative (as well as my Big Sister's friends) telling them how to avoid eternal damnation (he REALLY goes to town about all the drinking). He told me last year that I was risking it by not being married at 47 and should marry ANYONE right away to avoid "The Fire" as he puts it. His Christmas card to me this year said I needed to "repent or die" - whatever happened to "Happy Holidays"?  My sisters and I spend most of the day trying desperately to avoid him but he still manages to plant himself next to us and detail where we are failing "Him" in our lives and how we can "get right with God", etc. Honestly, between my Big Sister's drunken friends and "David" its like walking thru a minefield! How should I graciously deal with this guy?
PS: I'm beginning 2 think my family is dysfunctional.
A relative of mine used to be.....
an innkeeper for Holiday Inn, so he was the boss, but the stories he told about some of the stuff they would find in hotel rooms. SICK! I generally don't consider myself or anybody else too good for an honest day's work, but I think cleaning hotel rooms would be just too gross. But that's me.
Can you take your router to relative's house to
x
relative newbie, but no complaints here
I started out brand spanking new in October 2007 working at home. I hadn't even finished my on line program yet, but I needed to pay the mortgage. I got very lucky to find a company fairly quickly that would hire newbies. Pay sucked, but I knew that going in. I didn't know how bad it sucked at the time - I was just ecstatic to have a job.
I knew then and I know now that I'm never going to get rich in this profession. I knew at the very beginning that I was not going to make a lot of money right away. I didn't. I was lucky if I averaged $5 an hour. I also knew that I had to stick with it and get my experience in with a company that was willing to work with me and then I could move on to another, better paying job when I was a little more comfortable. I did a lot of research about this going in and if there was a company or an on line school that promised a lot of money right off the bat, I skipped right by that one. I'm sensible enough to know that's a load of horse hockey.
I love what I do. For the most part I enjoy the posters on this forum. Even the Negative Nancys. That just makes me work that much harder to do well so I can prove to myself that it can be done and I haven't made a mistake in learning how to do this.
As to starting a separate positive only forum/board. It can be done. It's fairly easy, as a matter of fact - and free. It would be separate from MT Stars, which means this thread and/or message is probably going to get poofed.
I'm happy to set it up, though, if y'all are serious. Feel free to e mail me.
I am a relative newbie of 9 years but - sm
I am good at what I do, have worked just about every specialty, can hit the ground running with whatever is thrown my way, very strong office background, take pride in my work. Currently training another MT supposedly with more experience than I and so far I am less than dazzled by her abilities. She is making some really dumb mistakes, i.e. types in the word period sometimes in sentences, new paragraph, stuff like that, cannot research worth a hoot, or just won't take the time (too lazy maybe?), and cannot fill out the template correctly that I use for this particulare account. Totally waste of my time as my training pay is a joke too. If things don't improve soon though she will be off that particular account which will be her loss at it is very easy and steady work too boot.
Was visiting a relative in the hospital...
back in the day when hospitals had job postings on big bulletin boards anyone could read. I was 19 and had no idea what a medical Transcriptionist was or did but by the description figured I might have a chance, so put in for that job and two others. (I was going to college part time at that point, had attended a business/trade co-op type high school (you went to school year round junior-senior years, working 2 weeks, schooling 2 weeks, and they had placed me at GM in labor relations as a secretary from age 16-18 - now THAT's where I should have stayed, in the offices at Delco/GM), but then again, that's all gone now, so who knows how that would have panned out).
Anyway, I got hired for a full-time second shift lab secretary/clerk position at the hospital instead of the transcriptionist job, learned a lot of useful info in the lab, also took transcription courses at the local community college part time. So the next time a medical transcriptionist job came up on that bulletin board, I got the job and stayed at the hospital a total of 18 years.
Hospital's gone, high school's gone, and like I said, Delco's gone, nothing but big grassy fields here in Ohio now. Nothing lasts, does it? But I count all those as good days and feel fortunate I got to experience all that.
Yep, had a distant relative going through some depressed times and did just that
x
A relative, employee at home, told me she
x
well it's really down to the nitty gritty pay issue. everything is relative pressure-wise
I mean if you get paid enough for the pressure it makes it a little more worthwhile than the feast or famine world of the MT. You know what I mean?
E-mail says I have been left 1/4 million bucks by distant relative. Do you think this is a scam?
I could really use the money.
The girl was 13, the rapist a distant relative they took in. Give money, give food and your time, b
you don't put your family at risk by taking in strangers. That's just plain foolish. There were over 3300 registered sex offenders in NO. Where are they now. In your community? Perhaps in your house? Good luck.
Fair is fair -- relative or not, 1 house or 100.
She's earning income and the only fair, right, just, ethical and LEGAL behavior is to report it wholly.
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