You are not going to win. You got the Argument Lady. She gets off on this stuff and you

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I have no possible way to cherrypick (and wouldn't if I did have a way, I detest that) as my work is manually assigned at the start of the day. I am a very high producer and do 2000+ lines in 3-4 hours. Always have.

It has to do with knowing your dictators (there are hundreds at the three hospitals I do) and using macros and expanders. That's all.

It's not as easy to do if you're not using free-standing Word or something, but for IC's working at home, yep, every day it's done.

.12 a line with my own clients, I no longer work for other services.  All I would get from other services was the work nobody else wanted to do.  After trying at least 5 other services I quit working for them because I was making...

Peanuts!  It wasn't worth it. 

Boy, I love that this board is available.  I'm an IC and only have catastrophic insurance so there's no mental health access available for me.

Anyway, here it is:

1.  I've noticed over the years that my boyfriend has periods of what seems to be a depression. It impacts his treatment of me, it then kind of upsets our routine and, of course, it upsets me. It seems that NOTHING I do or say can get him out of it.  In fact, the perkier or more cheerful I try to be, the more he withdraws (I must pretty get annoying, too, do ya think? with all that perkiness).  So I just try to stay out of his way and it usualy doesn't last more than about 10 days, usually more like 3-4.  Sometimes he can go up to as long as a month or two without one of these episodes. 

2.  When I try to talk to him about my concerns he generally goes into a denial thing.  It's usually a given, with him, that anything wrong in our relationship or even sometimes in his relationships with others, is absolutely my fault, but that's another story.  So when I mention casually or carefully that he seems down, is everything all right it kind of makes him get mad and aggressive and usually he will say "yeah, WHY?" kind of in an ugly way.  So as I said, usually I say nothing.  On occasion, he has admitted that he gets down at times but that's all he'[ll say, and then later he doesn't seem to remember that he admitted this. 

3.  A while back I approached him about his depressed mood and he got kind of defensive.  I mentioned that he acts particularly down around his brother and that his brother had said that he noticed he seemed depressed quite a bit lately and thought he was "suicidal" although I think the brother was just kind of exaggerating on the suicidal thing.  I only mentioned the brother commenting on his being down because, as always, my boyfriend usually denies any problem, and says it just my making things up. 

4.  Today my boyfriend got very angry that I had told him that his brother said he thought he seemed depressed - what kind of a girlfriend would mention something like that.  I said "a caring one" and should I just "pretend nothing is wrong" and no one else sees this either?  I said it wasn't meant to be an attack but a reaching out.  A couple other folks have seen my boyfriend in his depressed state and commented on it also (I have never told him that).  I said one of the reasons I mentioned his brother's comment was because he always negates what I say, tells me it's basically all in my head, nothing is wrong with him....blah-blah-blah. 

5.  He asked me how I would feel if my family talked to HIM about them thinking I was depressed.  I said I would be touched and concerned and most of all would feel like they really cared about me.  I certainly wouldn't be enraged.  He says I am lying about that.  He said it over and over that I couldn't possibly feel that way.  I said that depression is not like calling someone dishonest or cruel, that it's out of that realm completely.  That when people ask about how you are doing that they care about you.  He laughs cruelly at me when I say these things.  He also says this has driven a wedge into our relationship, that he can't trust me and that all I want to do say mean things about him.  I say "huh, what in the heck are you talking about?"

6.  Incidentally his sister committed suicide after cycles of depression for many years.  The family knew she had problems but didn't really get involved or try to contact her or do an intervention in the weeks before her suicide.  Most of all, they didn't talk to each other about what was going on either.   I was thinking this was perhaps family tradition to turn away from highly charged emotional issues?  I don't know, as I said, I don't operate like that.  I'm more from the school of "hey, there it is - let's talk about it.  But everytime I try to talk about it he denies it or tells me I'm lying.

HELP!!!!

What started our argument today is his mom and dad have been living in this house, if that is what you can call it, for about 20 years...they never cleaned it or anything (his mom said because "why bother when it is hopeless).  Well I don't care how small of a house it is it can still be clean.  Well, they come into some money, a few hundred thousand dollars, and they go out and buy this 150k house.  They say since we are having a hard time with our payment, being 2 payments behind, then we can "have" their old house.  The house is on lease land and the floors are rotted.  Well I felt like it would take a load of our shoulders and actually I felt like that was the only way we were going to get out of this mess..  We go down there, begin to clean one day....over 3 HUGE Flex bags by Glad of trash just from their bathroom - filled to the rim!!!! Flexed to the max....

I get back thinking of how bad it would hurt to walk out my door at my house for the last time and go live there.  So I said, "NO, I will fight for my house. I will work what hours needs to be worked, etc.  I am saving my house."  He gets mad, because his parents say we are going to lose it anyhow.  But hey - they had all of that money...we only needed $1,000.00 - could they not have lent it to us?????  But he thought I was wrong for asking after I told him I WOULD WORK TO GET US CAUGHT UP....I said, "well, if my son EVER needs anything like that, especially something to save his home, I will do what it takes to help him...And surely if I had came into hundreds of thousands of dollars, I think I could spare or lend 1,000. 

Sorry...I am hurt.

Just for grins and giggles.  Still LMAO. 

https://home.comcast.net/~jfmelnick/fruitcakelady.wmv

In this world of nastiness, it is refreshing to see your giving post, your willingness to help a Mom out by taking care of her child because she is not able to currently.  More impressive is that you are the *mommy* but are very open-minded and have full intentions of returning said child when the Mom returns back to being Mom. 

KUDOS to you!!!  You will be blessed and are probably blessed today!!!  What a great holiday post even though it's not holiday related!!  Warmed the cockles of my heart!! 

(((hugs2u)))

Signed: Another Mother in this life!! 

There are so many flames on this board, and, yes, many women get hurt enough to cry.  I have corresponded personally with many MTs after they have gotten flame broiled for no reason at all - in particular, newbies with some innocent question about the industry, or people looking to get into the MT world, who post an innocent post asking about "how" to get into the industry, and they are flame broiled to a crisp.  I give them my personal email and have made some great new friends that way. Yes, they have cried.  This board in particular is a DISGRACE regarding flaming newbies and MT wannabes.  If you aren't aware of it, then either: a. you rarely hang here (which I'm sure with your attitude will be your response, or

b. you're one of the flaming monsters who love to flame innocent posters.

Yes, people cry - not all - but I'm glad at least some still have the emoticon, oh excuse me - emotion left to do it. 

And all you "closet" passive/aggressive people who feel its fine to bash on the internet - you're wrong. And all the folks with an ounce of integrity know it. So, flame away!

I write her a check each and every month to her business name.  She does her OWN accounting and pays her own taxes and things on earnings and such.  As she is not my personal employee, my accountant has advised me that it is the same thing as paying our lawn service yearly, which means I do NOT need fill out a 1099 for her as I don't do it for TruGreen/ChemLawn or any other service provider for our home when we need it.  I do not pay her cash and I hope this ends this discussion.  She used to work at a local firm for $6.25 an hour before starting her own business (yes she is American). I pay her what she bills me for as well as Holiday bonuses (yes in cash as it is a gift not a fee) and I also pay her 4 times per year and give her the day off - we go to lunch instead and I foot the bill.  It saddens me to see this discussion go so far downhill regarding pay, tax evasion, etc.  I am thankful she does what she does for our family and she is thankful there are people like me who employ her to do what she loves to do.  Have a great weekend ladies (and gents)!  I'm glad I got a chance to look through here and set the record straight.