You're smart to do that.

• Others have other types of jobs? - edit
  • I do pet-sitting and have bred yorkies. - nm
  • Yep, i'm also a midwife..... - LMT
  • Other night job - Patti
    • Heh. - Unhappy Camper
  • You're smart to do that. - Misha
  • I breed Timney African Grey parrots. Have a baby now that will be ready early June. - everydayearthling
  • Woodworking. - MT in MT
    • Ohhh how nice; do you have a website? - I love homemade artsy things.
  • yep, two. I'm self employed in three ventures. sm - Mo

The messages you are viewing are archived/old.
To view latest messages and participate in discussions, select the boards given in left menu

and great at what we do that we need a challenge once in a while.  No, switching professions is not the answer if your desire is to stay at home.  I have found that helping each other through these message boards has been quite invigorating, and to know that I am not alone in my endeavors is quite reassuring, I must say! 

Your son sounds like a very smart young man. Not many kids these days truly care about their education. They look at high school as a party/social time, and dont look into the future what so ever, and said thing is a lot of our children are not getting the guidance from home either.

My son loves to learn and loves to be challenged and with him being home schooled we are able to do so.

And one other positive note on home schooling college intrance exams have shown that home schooled kids are just as smart if not smarter than those who go to public or private schools. The one on one they get is a big big factor in that.

Best of Luck!!!!!!!

Hello

I am currently an IC and I have 2 physicians.  I want to use the internet to transfer files.  I am currently using tapes.  Any insight as to how do this safely, quickly, and cost effectively would be greatly appreciated.  Oh, I am stuck using dial up.   Also, how much do you charge?

Lynn

It takes up about the bottom third of my screen.  You can change the size, but I have it set to give me about twelve lines because I have a lot of templates that start by the doc's name, so I can have twelve templates that start the same - Smithcons, Smithdch, SmithHandP - and need to be able to scroll and pick the one I want.  It may be that it can be positioned in another place, but this is how I started using it and have never checked for something different. 

It took me a couple of weeks to get real comfortable with watching the bottom of the screen, but once you get doing it, it becomes a rhythm.  I am so used to it that I am forever sending emails to my sister with my unexpanded expansions.  Like another poster said, success relies on "thinking" your Expander and constantly building it in ways that make sense to you.  

I have a massive glossary - 16869 words, 57341 phrases.  Some of it is glossaries that came with it, some of it is glossaries I downloaded (I don't remember where, it was years ago) and some of it is things I have added over the years - including full templates for every doc I can.  Some of it is from compilations - you can take a bunch of reports and have it analyze them for commonly occurring phrases and it then creates contiuations - like if you do "the patient was" then it will suggest "prepped and draped" "discharged to home" "given a prescription for" "alert and oriented" and you just scroll to the right one and plop it in.

I know a lot of it goes unused and some of it is duplicate, but I haven't taken the time to go clean it out.  It is a constantly shifting, evolving process and I think that is what makes it so productive for me.  Granted, I have never used anything else other than Auto Correct, so there may be better out there, but this works great for me.

I do notice you started back pedalling and saying "oh it's not really so bad and he is my best friend" Once you started getting some responses to get out of the marriage. 

I am glad you can see that your husband and marriage has some really positive traits but please it won't help you to minimize the areas where you are having trouble just because you are under fire.

I don't agree  that you should just up and leave your husband. He does sound like he might have some very serious issues and possibly you as well for putting up with this treatment but I dont' judge because each relationship can have some problems.  The key is recognize and try to solve not to fight.

 Tell me -- how can you miniimze the fact your husband is living it up so to speak -- going out with friends whenever he wants WITHOUT you.  While you stay home like menial labor taking care of kids. 

A marriage is  partnership where each individual needs to be able to pursue their own interests but the thoughts, feelings and well being of their partner has to come into play as well.  A marriage cannot survive when only one partners needs are being met and the other's are ignored. It just depends how long you are willing to put up with it or how long before he crosses another line (into an affair maybe when he is out alone). This is dangerous territory and you need to stop minimizing the situation and realize you marriage might be in grave danger.

What is sounds like is your husband wants his cake and to eat it too. He wants a great social life without you and kids tagging along -- reliving his single days possibly -- working out when he wants, going out to lunch or dinner.

There is nothing wrong with him pursing his individual interest and friendships --- we don't become bound at the hip when we become married -- we need to have our own sense of self. But the problem here is he DOES have a sense of self and readily pursues his own interestes but does ALLOW you to do the same. This is not partnership -- but it is control and oppression. 

While you still may get along well, have great sex etc this is not a healthy realtionship for either of you and your children will see that you constantly defer your dreams and desires and wants at your husbands wishes whilst he does whatever he wants.  Is this a lesson you want to teach them?  That woman should be kept in the home and be basically a maid, a cook, a childcare provider and at-home worker but does not deserve respect and dignity from husband and to be treated equally?

You can turn this around.  I am not suggesting you just bail.  Do as you suggested.  Stand up to your husband. Don't argue. Simply state (don't ask) that you will be going out -- if he refuses to watch the children then DO hire the sitter.  When you are both more calm let him know that you understand his desire to pursue his own interests and friendships and your support that -- but you deserve the same right.  Also you both need to balance those things with family time -- which should come first.

Consider martial counseling but don't just leave. See if he will agree. You and your husband need to see why he is so passive/aggressive towards you and why you are willing to put up with that. If you are religious seek Christian couseling and prayer from a pastor to help save your marriage.

However, if he refuses to change, refuses counseling you may come to a crossroad where you might have to consider if you can live under these conditions.

You should be afraid my dear.  I am divorced had a similar husband. I would be very frightened your hubby might be having an affair or might consider one.  He has you under his thumb... he comes and goes as he pleases and there are no repercussions. He does not respect your rights or see you as an equal patner. What does he do with his "buddys" -- go to the bars? Are there late nights? Business trips?

I am truly not trying to be mean but you need to open your eyes to the possibility where this might be going... and please do NOT say it won't happen to me because ALL women who have had a husband cheat think that. 

Also get yourself an education if you don't have one - work on a degree. I know you work as an MT but can you support a house and 3 children on that??  If you marriage does end... what will you do to make a living? Start thinking of taking some online courses or one night at community college.  Get another skill if you don't make enough as an MT.

Please just consider advice from someone who has been there. I am a single Mom with 2 boys. Was married over 10 years.  Been there and now struggling to make ends meat as a single parent. Wish someone had advised me the same. 

By all means work on your marriage but be prepared. Get educated. Save some of you own money in a bank account don't keep everything in his name.... It's hard to fight denial but you need to watch our for your kids and your future while trying to fight for the marriage.