The funniest stuff????? Please!
Posted By: What? on 2005-09-15
In Reply to: This seriously is the funniest stuff - tiny
Apparently a schizophrenic patient (frankie boy and my goodness obviously same person talking to self) has escaped the mental institution and wound up on this board! Can the administrator please delete this nonsense and ban Frankie Boy - my goodness! 
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This seriously is the funniest stuff
I have ever heard.
Funniest ASR yet!
Doc was dictating and beeper went off and ASR trascribed it as "she, she, she, she"!!
OMG, this is the funniest post....
xx
that is the funniest story I have ever sm
heard! My hubby works in Engineering at our local medical center and there are times when he has to go in there and fix things in the morgue. He literally has had to crawl under the table to fix something that would break while they actually have a body on the table!!!!!!!! After that he showers at work and then comes home and showers. He is NOT coming near me until he does! Thanks for the laugh!
FUNNIEST DICTATOR/DICTATION
What's the funniest thing you have had to transcribe - here are my personal top two favorites - one was from an ER doc who had been working 72 hours - he dictated that the patient had a ball in the 9th hole on the green and he was going to try to miss the sand pit - I called the hospital and let the head ER doc know - they let the poor sleep-deprived doctor go home and someone else finished his dictation. - the other - I had a doctor who dictated all of his reports to the tune of Mack the Knife - no kidding - I think about him everytime I hear that song. He was quite creative and talented.
This is the funniest thing I've heard in all my
make 3 cpl... if you are really a physician, please stick to that, you'll make more money seeing one patient than we can edit reports in 12 hours! Furthermore, the jobs even that are classified as IC make you stick to a schedule! So, there's no coming and going between patients, okay?! 
I mean this OP is joking right?????????????
Oh, my. That's the funniest thing I've read in a long time.
AHDI: Solving the world's problems, one foreign MT at a time.
ROLFMAO
Fun With "Rick" and Jane is the best/funniest movie I've seen in a long time! s/m
Okay, it's not Rick and Jane, but the censor wouldn't let me put the short form of Richard.  LOL
I think I smell either VR on the easy stuff, or offshoring of the easy stuff.
d
stuff
I really, really saw a shooting star or an angel or something the day before my Dad's funeral 10/15/00. It was a crystal clear day, I heard something that just lead me outside and I looked up and saw the shooting star or whatever. My Brother-in-Law saw it too because he was outside washing the cars. But it was a calming thing, like he was giving us a signal that he was doing just fine.
QA stuff
I have a hard time with ESL's but I was trying my best
I'd tell them to stuff it, but that's just me
Sick of the way the companies refuse to let the facilities or the physicians know when they're just being ridiculous and take it out on us because we're "nobody important."
Do not buy from the(right)stuff
I paid $390 for a C-phone that worked for 20 minutes. It kept shorting out, and then died. The repair shop said motherboard was fried, not repairable. The guy did not even include the power cord with it. Rip off.
I could become such a cow on that stuff!
It is addictive. Yummy.
Well, I know my stuff, been doing nothing but ER MT
for 10 years...why I don't I get paid for my knowledge, for being a good employee, i.e., never call off even if sick, never miss my shift, and still not valued. Not sure I understand what you mean in your post about MTs not being good MTs because when you do find a GOOD MT, y'all don't value them anyway!
QA stuff
Hayseed, I don't know squat about QA, but learning something new in this field only makes you more valuable to yourself and to the company you work for. You have nothing to lose, lots to gain, and if you hate it, you can always go back to transcribing. Variety is the spice of life!
Congratulations! Let us know how you like it after you get a few days under your belt.
I do all that stuff too. But sometimes you just don't
Even more often, you don't always get the CORRECT results. Then you end up having to do research on the research. Sort of like looking into a succession of never-ending mirrors.
There's a way to get around all that stuff -
When mgmt. gets stingy about vacations, all you have to do is catch the "flu". A cold, they want you to come in and give it to everybody. The flu, they DON'T! Cooking for potlucks? The easy way: Just say NO to potlucks. Feel you MUST participate? Bring in a small bag of potato chips or carrot sticks. Office meeting? Good time to do those Kegel exercises or other isometrics. Pretend to be taking notes, & have a page of a crossword puzzle hidden underneath. Mentally think of what you need at the market and make a shopping list. Play tic-tac-toe or hangman with the person sitting next to you. If you're stuck sitting there watching someone's mouth flap for an hour and a half, try to envision money flying out of it and into your pocket, which is essentially what's happening. Not getting enough breaks? Develop "overactive bladder", and occasionally overshoot the ladies' room and instead go outside and take a lap around the building. If you have a computer-related pain or injury, a doctor's prescription can buy you mandatory breaks at regular intervals. Nothing they can do about it.
crock pot stuff, one more
This is something I made when my kids were growing up. SO EASY! A blade pot roast is what I always used. Put IN crockpot...sprinkle on a package of taco seasoning mix, NO LIQUIDS. Cook eight to 10 hours. Shred meat and serve on tortillas, put out chopped onions, chopped green chili peppers, avacado, chopped tomato, actually anything the kids like...let them make their own soft tacos. Enjoy.
Maybe some, but I do. However, I have MTs that don't and GUESS at stuff.
c
Yesterday and all the other old stuff.
Not to worry. No depression here. I just think it's a beautiful song.
All the original stuff. nm
nm
thank you. This MD always says goofy stuff
sigh
especially when there's only bad stuff to show
I noticed that Shepard Smith on Fox (not considered a liberal news outlet) was not especially impressed with the government response to the disaster. He was desperately begging for help for people stranded for days on a bridge.
I do now and then, mostly stuff about the house but have been looking
for additional $$. Know what I want to do and currently researching finding suppliers, preferably here in the U.S. I'll be happy with an extra few hundred, but if it takes off...... I'll take that too!
weird stuff
My daughters had pityriasis rosea on their legs. That was my first though when I read this post. In fact, Dorland's says it is "most often seen on the trunks, arms, or thighs."
Sometimes stuff just happens and you need to move on
I sure wish life was a simple as you get married and stay together forever..Life is not that simple and even though we think that we will stay married, things happen sometimes and we find ourselves in a situation we never thought we would be in..i.e., falling in love with someone else or getting divorced cause our spouse has fallen out of love or in love with someone else. I will not past judgment on anyone who separates and/or goes through a divorce..Been there, never thought I would be..Thought our love was gonna last forever, thought he would never cheat on me..Stuff happens in life. Having gone through it, I realize people grow and sometimes the other person does not grow in the same direction. Why stay with someone you are miserable with..Life is too short..Nothing worse than living with someone you no longer love or there is so much pain between you that it is even painful just to be in each others company..
Shorthand stuff
I appreciate the hints on SH too; 100 years ago, I took actual Gregg shorthand. When I got PRD+ I never typed numbers and used PRD's suggestions.
j - shun sound (tion) hosj = hospitalilzation
s = pleural (fts = feet) singular = ft
g = ing (ugg = undergoing)
d= past tense = (presd = presented)
ly = ally or ly ending (bll = bilaterally).
os = ostomy
ec = ectomy
ot - otomy
isis = used for words ending is iasis or isis
Most of the time, I just listen to a word and pick out the highlights. duodenum = ddm duodenal ddl. Klepingers becomes kleps. Vicryl is vcl. #1 Vicryl is 1v,etc.
To expand an abbrev. I just double the end letter of the abbreviation and don't use a - as sugesstedin PRD+
I've always used the first 3 or 4 letters and added whatever the ending was. I was always taught that # required to much fumbling around as well as other characters, so I avoid them
These are only a few of my shortcuts and they have worked very well for me for 30 years.
Call him. Tell him come on, help you get your stuff.
That is just the song I needed right now! You're feeling me, Listenup! Thanks.
Lots of stuff - sm
powdered drink mixes (PowerAde, Gatorade, KoolAid if it is presweetened.)
Gum.
Hard candies.
Decks of cards (I also sent a book with about 1000 card games in it.)
Dental floss.
Toothbrushes.
Magazines (nothing
pornographic or even remotely close to being so.)
Hometown newspapers
DVDs (most units now have DVD players for R&R)
Journals and pens/pencils
The most popular item was Baby Wipes. The dust and sand get into everything.
Basically you can send just about anything except...
No glass containers.
Nothing of a religious nature (bibles, etc...)
Nothing of a pornographic nature.
Someone said they sent jerky. We weren't allowed to send even that when my son was there. It was also considered offensive to their "host" country (Iraq.)
Yes, especially when it's all "nitpicky" stuff. It's almost like they (sm)
Can't find anything wrong, so they start on the little stupid things. I hate that. I never mind being corrected when it's legit; for example, I found out after about 10 years of transcribing that I had been spelling "Fahrenheit" w/o the "H". Things like that, please tell me. Otherwise, don't bother.
Yep, they spell out that stuff...
but would never think of spelling out a difficult medical term or another physicians name... nope.. and they think they are really helping you out!!
Thanks to MTStars and MT-Stuff
I just received my mouse pad from MT-Stuff. Thanks to MTStars and MT-Stuff for the great recognition of Medical Transcription Week. It was great. I usualy have no luck at all so this is truly amazing.
What is with this jammie stuff?
YOU obviously work from home too, so why are you so down on everyone else?! Jealouse much?
wow, wonder if Barbara really said all that stuff (nm)
nm
Really? I keep getting my stuff from them and so far still AAMT...?
Just wondering when the BIG change is coming..lol
Lots of stuff...here ya go
SEARCH ENGINES
http://www.americanheart.org/presenter.jhtml?identifier=1200000
American Heart Association
http://www.rjmatthewsmd.com
Click on Complete List of Definitions, Cardiology.
http://www.healthcentral.com/mhc/top/003371.cfm#Normal%20values:
Health Central Home Page, Links to Cardiology Terms, Link to Diseases, Conditions, Drugs, Procedures, etc.
http://www.medscape.com/cardiologyhome?LID=5762837
Medscape Cardiology
http://www.nhlbi.nih.gov/
National Heart, Lung and Blood Institute
DICTIONARIES AND GLOSSARIES
http://www.med.miami.edu/med/cardiology/glossary.asp
Cardiology Glossary A-Z
http://www.hhmi.org/biointeractive/vlabs/cardiology/content/cg/glossary.html
Glossary of Cardiology Terms
http://www.cts.usc.edu/glossaryofterms.html
Cardiothoracic Surgery Glossary
http://wwwp.medtronic.com/Newsroom/LinkedItemDetails.do?itemId=1100805718927&itemType=glossary&lang=en_US
Medtronic, Glossary of Cardiology Terms
http://www.asnc.org/ncfoundation/glossary.cfm
American Society of Nuclear Cardiology Glossary of Terminology
http://www.medterms.com/script/main/hp.asp
MedTerms Medical Dictionary
http://www.americanheart.org/presenter.jhtml?identifier=10000056
AHA, Heart and Stroke Encyclopedia
DISEASES AND CONDITIONS
http://www.healthcentral.com/ency/408/sympidxa.html
Symptoms Reference A-Z
http://www.healthcentral.com/encyclopedia/408/index_A.html
Diseases and Conditions A-Z
http://www.healthline.com/
Link to Top 200 Websites for Diseases and Conditions, Excellent Site!
http://www.medicinenet.com/script/main/alphaidx.asp?p=a_dt
Diseases and Conditions A-Z
http://www.fpnotebook.com/CV48.htm
Heart Failure Causes
http://www.merck.com/mrkshared/mmanual/section16/chapter211/211a.jsp
Merck, Aneurisms
http://www.merck.com/mrkshared/mmanual/section16/chapter212/212a.jsp
Merck, Peripheral Vascular Disease
http://www.merck.com/mrkshared/mmanual/section16/sec16.jsp
Merck, Cardiovascular Disorders
http://www.medicinenet.com/cardiomyopathy_dilated/article.htm
Heart Disease, Dilated Cardiomyopathy
LABORATORY AND PATHOLOGY
http://www.chfpatients.com/tests/bnp.htm
BNP info, normals, etc.
http://health.ucsd.edu/labref/
USCD Laboratory Services Guide, Choose lab test or procedure A-Z, EXCELLENT!
PHARMACOLOGY
http://www.healthcentral.com/peoplespharmacy/408/drugs/brand_index_a.html
People’s Pharmacy, Search by Generic or Brand-Name Drugs
http://www.healthcentral.com/peoplespharmacy/408/more_index_1_12_49.html
People’s Pharmacy, Herbal Library
http://www.medicinenet.com/aspirin_and_antiplatelet_medications/article.htm
Aspirin and Antiplatelet Medications Index
http://www.medicinenet.com/ace_inhibitors/article.htm
ACE Inhibitors Index
http://www.astrazeneca.com/productbrowse/1.aspx
AstraZeneca, Products and Medications
http://www.medicinenet.com/beta_blockers/article.htm
Beta Blockers Index
http://www.medicinenet.com/calcium_channel_blockers/article.htm
Calcium Channel Blockers Index
http://www.centerwatch.com/patient/drugs/DRUGLIST.html
Drugs Approved by the FDA by Year
TERMINOLOGY, GENERAL
http://www.tmc.edu/thi/glossary.html
Texas Heart Institute, Cardiovascular Glossary A-Z
http://heartdisease.about.com/cs/glossary/a/glossary.htm
Cardiac Terminology
http://chorus.rad.mcw.edu/index/2.html
Cardiovascular System A-Z Terminology Links
TERMINOLOGY, SURGICAL
http://www.musc.edu/perfusion/glossary.htm
Glossary of Terms and Acronym Expansions for Perfusion Technology, Open-Heart Surgery and Cardiology.
http://sangerclinic.com/surgeryTerms.php
Surgery Terms and Procedures
http://www.sts.org/doc/3564
Heart Surgery Terminology
http://www.medicinenet.com/coronary_artery_bypass_graft/article.htm
CABG (Coronary Artery Bypass Graft) Surgery
TESTING AND PROCEDURES
http://www.merck.com/mrkshared/mmanual/section16/chapter198/198b.jsp
Merck, Noninvasive Diagnostic Cardiovascular Procedures
http://www.merck.com/mrkshared/mmanual/section16/chapter198/198c.jsp
Merck, Invasive Diagnostic Cardiovascular Procedures
http://homepages.enterprise.net/djenkins/ecghome.html#contents
EKG terminology and sample tracings of both normal and abnormal rhythms.
http://davidge2.umaryland.edu/~emig/ekgtu01.html
Introduction to EKGs.
http://www.usfca.edu/fac-staff/ritter/ekg.htm
Basic EKG Interpretation
http://www.ecglibrary.com/ecghome.html
EKGs, Very Complete!
http://www.ce5.com/ekg100.htm
EKG, Basic Rhythms and Waveforms, as well as “Vocabulary Words.”
http://www.ce5.com/ekg101.htm
EKG, Sinus Rhythm
http://www.ce5.com/ekg102.htm
EKG, Sinus Tachycardia
http://www.ce5.com/ekg103.htm
EKG, Sinus Bradycardia
http://www.ce5.com/ekg105.htm
EKG, Supraventricular Tachycardia
http://www.ce5.com/ekg106.htm
EKG, Atrial Fibrillation
http://www.ce5.com/ekg107.htm
EKG, Atrial Flutter
http://www.ce5.com/ekg104.htm
EKG, Wandering Atrial Pacemaker (WAP)
http://medicine.creighton.edu/radiology/Noninvarttest.html
Choose Basic Imaging, Choose Non-Invasive Arterial Testing. Excellent Site!
http://www.nationalasthma.org.au/html/management/spiro_book/index.asp
Spirometry site
http://www.medicinenet.com/script/main/alphaidx.asp?p=a_proc
Procedures and Tests A-Z
http://www.medicinenet.com/coronary_angioplasty/article.htm
Coronary Angioplasty Index
http://www.medicinenet.com/exercise_stress_test/article.htm
Exercise Stress Test Index
http://www.medicinenet.com/cat_scan/article.htm
CAT Scan Index
http://www.medicinenet.com/mri_scan/article.htm
MRI Scan Index
http://www.medicinenet.com/chest_x-ray/article.htm
Chest X-Ray Index
Weird stuff
Years ago when working at a hospital, I typed a report where the doctor dictated that the gentleman was "entertaining himself" with a Real Lemon bottle. Needless to say, he had to be seen in ER. All of us about died on that one, wondering what SIZE Real Lemon bottle he used?
Sell my own stuff.
I had to take my site down for a while because I've been too busy but I make soaps, candles, rice socks, bird houses...lots of stuff.
I'm talking about the one-on-one stuff. sm
Where on need someone on-site to set it up, configure it, troublesoot, etc.
what kind of stuff
is she saying? Can you give an example?
Definitely no more of this on call stuff!
It's not worth the stress and anxiety. You need to take care of yourself. If they won't accommodate, maybe you should look elsewhere for work. It's more important to be physically and emotionally healthy than earn a few extra bucks. Keep us posted on they say after receiving your email. (hugggsss)
Expander stuff sm
I don't care for it, but many others swear by it. Expander programs
are all a bit different and it is different strokes for different folks,
literally.
I have used Smartype for years. I have used the same glossary all of
that time. It runs ONLY in Word and most of the platforms out there do
not support it and you can't use it.
I also have a copy of InstanText and I rather like it. I need to fix
it to incorporate many of my SmarType bad habits, but I am working on
it.
I don't put quite as much store in what program one uses as I do the
size of the glossary. If you only have several hundred shortcuts, you
are working entirely too hard. I have close to 20,000 of them, and no I
don't memorize them and yes I use most of that number or they would not
be there. I am proficient with the way the shortcuts are formatted.
Honestly, however, 20,000 shortcuts is probably not enough even yet.
If you need a glossary or want to look at the way others are formatted,
email me and I'll send you a copy of mine, and I am happy to explain
the way they are formatted. What I have can be converted to InstanText
and ShortHand, and certainly already runs in SmarType.
Work smart, not hard.
She apparently knows her stuff
Not to mention, from the sounds of it, she knows the real Sheri. I'm certainly not one to pick up someone else's baton; however, I would be a fool if I dismissed facts presented by well-respected and knowledgeable veterans of the profession.
I will NOT type that stuff! sm
I don't think they hear what they say. The pt, should they ever see the record, WOULD see it.
I don't care what verbatim means, I won't do it. I'll blank it. Now, sometimes they do say these things as an aside which I don't type either.
Isn't that like x-rated stuff?
Tech stuff- Need FTP help. sm
I have a client that needs to log on via FTP. She is not able to do so, and so I think it's the firewall.
Is there any way to log on via FTP without changing firewall settings? Would resetting the firewalls help or her shutting the firewall down and then restarting after she logs in help?
Even when she uses Internet Explorer to log in via FTP, she gets a message and it doesn't allow her to log in.
I will probably need some sort of software to get in and fix stuff like that. If anyone has recommendations, it would be appreciated.
Moving big stuff
Log onto Craigslist for your area and post a notice - you need someone with a truck who is traveling in your direction to take your furniture. If you are near a college, perhaps a student would keep the rocking chair or whatever til the semester ends in May and transport it then - put up notices around your town. Post a Craigslist notice on your destination town's board - just spread the word and someone will step forward to help you out. I got a refrigerator box from Sears one year when we lived in Hawaii and put my rocking chair in that, filled with sheets and blankets to pad it. I taped it like there was no tomorrow. Shipped from Hawaii to British Columbia without a problem.
I haven't set up a lot of stuff sm
in word 2003 but I have a question.
When you put things in Auto Text like a w hole page document or something......is there a quick way using keyboard commands to bring it up into your document. Kind of like when you use auto correct (word expander), can you use a couple Keystrokes to bring auto tex up for bringing up bigger documents.
Never have done this before.
Thanks
I kept trying to tell the manager this same stuff
I don't work there any more (thank goodness), but I kept trying question things to get to the same point. The transcription manager looked me in the eye and told me that she had talked to the people at Aria who told her that it was not a Word-based platform and that anything with Word was not compatible. I knew that was crap because we would cut and paste from Word all the time. The other part of our problem was that she had spent $5k on Stedman's without making sure it was compatible first (which in our situation it wasn't) and they were waiting for the new budget year to get another expensive piece of the puzzle. Win-Rho or something like that. I got so many different variations on the story I lost track of which line of garbage they were feeding at any one time.
The transcription manager was way too interested in showing her boobs and flirting with the men in the practice and clearly didn't know what the heck she was doing regarding the software, and the IT people couldn't help her. I ended up going back home for more $$ than I was being paid in house and happily washed my hands of both the practice and the software.
All this cherry picking stuff LOL
Could be that those accusing high producers of "cherry picking" might possibly make a better line count if they 1) Quit trying to find out how many lines their co-workers have typed and 2) Stay off the boards until they have reached their goal. I don't think posting to newsgroups pays all that well. I don't care which company it is, no typing, no money.
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