Teenager dress problems
Posted By: Peeps on 2005-11-07
In Reply to: Teenage dress problems... - Mom of 3
My oldest graduated last year and started dressing in black (mostly black t-shirts and jeans) in his junior year. This drove my DH absolutely crazy and still does! We never had any trouble with him in school either; good grades, part-time job, never ran with the wrong crowd, always called to keep in touch when he was out, etc., just like your daughter. We let it go. He never wanted any tattoos, collars or piercings (although he did buy a bracelet with the metal points once. He never wore this to school however.) The biggest problem we ever had was the kind of music he liked to listen to. We did forbid him to buy certain types and bands after we listened to them, but he didn't argue. He is now in college and is doing great. His grades are high and he still checks in a few times a week just to "talk."
If I were you, I would let the clothing thing go, as long as it doesn't change into anything concerning. Most teens need to express themselves somewhat and this really seems pretty innocent. My DH and I are really pretty conservative. We found that it is best to pick you battles. There are certainly a lot more horrific problems out there to be concerned about than dressing in black. Your job is to just keep an eye on things and if you see any drastic changes in her (grades, personality, friends, etc), that is the time to step in. She seems like a well rounded young lady with a good head on her shoulders. You seem to have done an excellent job in raising her. She will soon be a legal adult and you now have to start trusting her judgement. I think she will be just fine! Good luck!
Complete Discussion Below: marks the location of current message within thread
The messages you are viewing
are archived/old. To view latest messages and participate in discussions, select
the boards given in left menu
Other related messages found in our database
dress
Wow, no disrespect at all, but you call that "rebelling"? You're very lucky! When I was a teenager in the 80s, I dressed in "punk" gear; however, I was a straight A student, didn't smoke or drink, and was basically a "good girl" - that was just my way of expressing myself. I personally see nothing wrong with letting teens dress to express themselves even if it is in a way we personally aren't crazy about (unless of course it is obscene or too sexy or involve lots of piercings). Wearing lots of black, dying and cutting hair in "alternative ways", things like that I believe are basically harmless ways of kids expressing themselves and, like your daughter basically pointed out, showing their individuality. You really need to look at what is going on INSIDE them instead of on the outside. If all is well on the inside, don't worry so much about the outside. They'll outgrow whatever fad or trend they are experimenting with. I did.
dilemma with teenager
I have a 14-year-old daughter who is on an athletic team that practices after school every day. We live in a rural area and it is a 15 mile round trip to pick her up. A neighbor boy who just got his license a week ago has offered to bring her home as he goes right by our house. We have had a rule that she is not allowed to ride with boys in a car alone yet but with the price of gas, I'm wondering if I should rescind that rule. I don't really know the boy well so I'm uneasy about it. Any thoughts on this?
dilema with teenager
I wouldn't let her!!
In some states it is illegal for a new teenager driver to drive for the first six months with anybody but licensed over 18 family members. Check your new driver rules in your state.
Teenager daughters
Thank you Terri for your encouragement. I will definitely keep your suggestions in mind.
Teenager troubles.
Boy, do I know what you're going through. Daughter is talented, intelligent and athletic. We have always been strict but she is allowed so many extra activities that we provide the opportunity for her to do. Everything going for her and still tries to defy us. She is down to no phone, no car and go nowhere without us.
Please. You sound like a teenager. LOL
Like OP suggests: Go live over there if you're upset about it and live with them and do all you can to increase their economy.
Dress him like a smurf
*********
I don't care how they dress.....sm
I know that customer service is sorely lacking, especially in bigger cities (forget what they wear) - where they act like they are doing YOU a favor instead of realizing that we, the customer, are THEIR BREAD AND BUTTER. Customer service has been sorely lacking in central through S. Florida for a long, long time......it's really sad.
There was a program on TV recently, think it was 20/20 (not sure), but it was about HOW AMERICA GOT SO RUDE....and 20 minutes of this show was spent on cell phone usage.....and I concur. I believe the cell phone, while necessary for some, is the bane of the world. People became incredibly self absorbed and don't you just LOVE the people waiting on you in any customer service who CHAT ON THEIR CELLPHONES while they are waiting on you? Or who do their jobs with their cellulars attached to their ears on personal phone calls while working (not emergent phone calls)? It's nauseating.......
My son did. I am ashamed to say that I didn't know how and I had to ask my teenager to do it.
x
Is there a teenager you can hire to take care (sm)
of the younger ones and tell the 10 year old that the sitter is just there to watch the younger ones and hang out with him/her?
I don't let my kids dress like that! My son will wear
anything I buy him, usually athletic attire, like Nike or Addidas T-shirs and carpenter jeans that fit!
My daughter likes jeans and t-shirts (kinda tom-boyish). So, I am lucky in that regard.
If they were difficult, they would never be allowed out unless they dressed properly.
I have a fit if my daughters shorts are too short. You know, how they roll them at the waist and the shorts go up their butts - well, that is a no-no to me. I don't care where we are in public, I pull them down to a normal length. Other than that, their dress code is fine.
Teenage dress problems...
Okay, I hate to ask this, but I need some unbiased opinions. My almost 18-year-old high school senior has of late been dressing in a lot of black. It's not weird stuff at all, other than a couple of camisoles that I'm not wild about, and she always wears a jacket with those. The thing is, she's happy, outgoing, going to school without trouble, doing her homework, happy around the family, planning her future, doing her own laundry, keeping her room clean, everything you could ask for. She calls us when she's out and keeps us posted where she's at, and works very part-time at a drug store. Her hair isn't dyed, she's not wearing weird make up, and isn't doing the weird jewely like dog collars or any of that.
But it bugs me! When I ask her she just says that she doesn't want to dress like the typical Abercrombie crowd. She does have some tan pants and a colorful sweater she wears here and there, but she really does love the black primarily. I'm a worry wart type and am just worried this will escalate into the look I spoke of above. She swears she's not interested in tattoos, piercings, or any of the rest of it. Should I just back off and leave her alone? Is this uncommon or just typical teenage "testing of the waters." She's never rebelled in any way before.
Thankfully in Georgia it's unlawful for a teenager to....sm
have anyone in the car with them other than an immediate relative for the first 6 months they have their license. Other than that there is no way I'd put my child into the car of basically a stranger since you don't know this boy well. While all may be innocent at first you never know when it might turn otherwise.
My 5-year-old daughter in a dress-up outfit.
dress in black and ugly jewely
I'm wondering when it will start. I'm 45, still as regular as a teenager, nary
s
where do you live? Sounds like the dress code in Florida
Out of her dress today (instead of out of her dressing) but I caught it when proofing.
.
They're not supposed to touch my computer ever, but my teenager is sneaky!
I just happened to notice just now that it happened after I had transcribed dictation file through the TransNet Player and and then I got a VR report as my next one and the wave volume was down again as soon as I got into the VR report. Is there a difference in the sound files?
rich skanks dress better and have nicer cars and homes.
The only person that bothered me at my wedding was the one who wore a white dress. Black is fine.
|