Teenage dress problems...
Posted By: Mom of 3 on 2005-11-07
In Reply to:
Okay, I hate to ask this, but I need some unbiased opinions. My almost 18-year-old high school senior has of late been dressing in a lot of black. It's not weird stuff at all, other than a couple of camisoles that I'm not wild about, and she always wears a jacket with those. The thing is, she's happy, outgoing, going to school without trouble, doing her homework, happy around the family, planning her future, doing her own laundry, keeping her room clean, everything you could ask for. She calls us when she's out and keeps us posted where she's at, and works very part-time at a drug store. Her hair isn't dyed, she's not wearing weird make up, and isn't doing the weird jewely like dog collars or any of that.
But it bugs me! When I ask her she just says that she doesn't want to dress like the typical Abercrombie crowd. She does have some tan pants and a colorful sweater she wears here and there, but she really does love the black primarily. I'm a worry wart type and am just worried this will escalate into the look I spoke of above. She swears she's not interested in tattoos, piercings, or any of the rest of it. Should I just back off and leave her alone? Is this uncommon or just typical teenage "testing of the waters." She's never rebelled in any way before.
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teenage daughters
Excuse me for being clueless but what do DH and DD stand for?
I understand where you are coming from. My 2nd daughter from 1st marriage is almost 16 and lives with her dad. Her stepmom is very disrespectful of me. Always telling daughter what I should be doing, like getting a "real job". Now my daughter has taken to calling me names any chance she gets, cursing and disrespecting my fiance's family also. Since she lives with her dad we decided not to let her come down for a few weeks but that will not solve the problem.
Any ideas anyone. I think the names and lack of respect is coming from the stepmom but she of course denies doing anything wrong.
I'm not on it, but my teenage daughter is. She has it set
to where only her friends can see her page. I think MySpace is more for teenagers than adults. The adult people I've see on MySpace are sort of trashy. Some are creepy guys looking for girls, some post as baiters, some are sleazy women, and the list goes on. I don't see a problem with my daughter being on it with the protection in place, but no child should be allowed to have a MySpace page without their parent being able to review it from time to time and have it set so only the childs friends can see him/her.
What I have done for my teenage daughter is iron it. But...you have to be careful.
This is assuming your poster has not been written or colored with ink and has not been made out of wax. Set the iron to medium heat, NO steam. Place a clean, white, cotton towel or cloth on the bottom and top of the poster onto the ironing board. Make absolutely sure there are no wrinkles in the material. Double check that the iron is not spitting any steam, then place the iron on top of the material and let it set for 10 to 15 seconds at a time allowing the poster to cool in between. You'll probably need to do this 5 or 6 times. Check the poster to see that the wrinkles are diminishing (they will not completely disappear, it's a poster afterall). That's it. Hope it helps.
Teenage eating disorders question...sm
Hello,
I'm convinced that my stepdaughter is developing an eating disorder but am having a hard time convincing my husband of the same. The 15-year-old girl has lost I think at least 30 pounds in the past few weeks and refuses to eat more than a few bites and wants to just drink prune juice to help her poop. She won't listen to me that you have to eat in order to have something to poop and is obsessed that she's not pooping every day but also says she's not going to eat.
She was previously overweight but now is what I think is a weight that she looks good. I'm concerned that she's going to end up ill if she doesn't start eating consistently. My husband seems to think this is just a fad she's going through.
Any ideas, suggestions, etc?
dress
Wow, no disrespect at all, but you call that "rebelling"? You're very lucky! When I was a teenager in the 80s, I dressed in "punk" gear; however, I was a straight A student, didn't smoke or drink, and was basically a "good girl" - that was just my way of expressing myself. I personally see nothing wrong with letting teens dress to express themselves even if it is in a way we personally aren't crazy about (unless of course it is obscene or too sexy or involve lots of piercings). Wearing lots of black, dying and cutting hair in "alternative ways", things like that I believe are basically harmless ways of kids expressing themselves and, like your daughter basically pointed out, showing their individuality. You really need to look at what is going on INSIDE them instead of on the outside. If all is well on the inside, don't worry so much about the outside. They'll outgrow whatever fad or trend they are experimenting with. I did.
Dress him like a smurf
*********
I don't care how they dress.....sm
I know that customer service is sorely lacking, especially in bigger cities (forget what they wear) - where they act like they are doing YOU a favor instead of realizing that we, the customer, are THEIR BREAD AND BUTTER. Customer service has been sorely lacking in central through S. Florida for a long, long time......it's really sad.
There was a program on TV recently, think it was 20/20 (not sure), but it was about HOW AMERICA GOT SO RUDE....and 20 minutes of this show was spent on cell phone usage.....and I concur. I believe the cell phone, while necessary for some, is the bane of the world. People became incredibly self absorbed and don't you just LOVE the people waiting on you in any customer service who CHAT ON THEIR CELLPHONES while they are waiting on you? Or who do their jobs with their cellulars attached to their ears on personal phone calls while working (not emergent phone calls)? It's nauseating.......
I don't let my kids dress like that! My son will wear
anything I buy him, usually athletic attire, like Nike or Addidas T-shirs and carpenter jeans that fit!
My daughter likes jeans and t-shirts (kinda tom-boyish). So, I am lucky in that regard.
If they were difficult, they would never be allowed out unless they dressed properly.
I have a fit if my daughters shorts are too short. You know, how they roll them at the waist and the shorts go up their butts - well, that is a no-no to me. I don't care where we are in public, I pull them down to a normal length. Other than that, their dress code is fine.
Teenager dress problems
My oldest graduated last year and started dressing in black (mostly black t-shirts and jeans) in his junior year. This drove my DH absolutely crazy and still does! We never had any trouble with him in school either; good grades, part-time job, never ran with the wrong crowd, always called to keep in touch when he was out, etc., just like your daughter. We let it go. He never wanted any tattoos, collars or piercings (although he did buy a bracelet with the metal points once. He never wore this to school however.) The biggest problem we ever had was the kind of music he liked to listen to. We did forbid him to buy certain types and bands after we listened to them, but he didn't argue. He is now in college and is doing great. His grades are high and he still checks in a few times a week just to "talk."
If I were you, I would let the clothing thing go, as long as it doesn't change into anything concerning. Most teens need to express themselves somewhat and this really seems pretty innocent. My DH and I are really pretty conservative. We found that it is best to pick you battles. There are certainly a lot more horrific problems out there to be concerned about than dressing in black. Your job is to just keep an eye on things and if you see any drastic changes in her (grades, personality, friends, etc), that is the time to step in. She seems like a well rounded young lady with a good head on her shoulders. You seem to have done an excellent job in raising her. She will soon be a legal adult and you now have to start trusting her judgement. I think she will be just fine! Good luck!
My 5-year-old daughter in a dress-up outfit.
dress in black and ugly jewely
where do you live? Sounds like the dress code in Florida
Out of her dress today (instead of out of her dressing) but I caught it when proofing.
.
rich skanks dress better and have nicer cars and homes.
The only person that bothered me at my wedding was the one who wore a white dress. Black is fine.
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