Question for ICMT whose was asking about a funeral....sm
Posted By: Southern belle on 2006-09-21
In Reply to:
What did you decide?
My grandmother died last week and I let my 6-year-old attend the funeral. A child psychologist friend had advised that I should let her do as much as she wanted to do - i.e. if she wanted to see the body in the open casket then let her but if she was scared then don't. A year ago we buried a cat and I was able to relate to her that my grandmother's spirit has moved on to heaven while her body is here on earth, just like with our old cat and she related to that very well. She ended up insisting on seeing the body in the casket. Overall she did very well with the funeral experience. This was her first funeral to attend where she was old enough to have a clue what was going on.
While at the funeral home I read a pamphlet they had for talking to kids about death. It made suggestions of letting a child mourn the way they desire and said that it's helpful for kids to draw pictures about their feelings. I agree with this totally as play/art is what I do with my daughter when she's upset about something and it helps her to talk about it while we're making something artistic.
Complete Discussion Below:  marks the location of current message within thread
The messages you are viewing
are archived/old.
To view latest messages and participate in discussions, select
the boards given in left menu
Other related messages found in our database
Great advice ICMT
I said the other day I wondered how many graduates actually stick with this. When someone says "work from home" it is so appetizing to the ear that people jump on it but there is so, so much involved and it can be stressful. I've being and MT for 27 years, came right out of highscool doing so I had no training. I cried for the first 2 days! But I looked up every word that confused me and I remembered them.
OP, thre are definitely companies that hire newbies.
While starting a business sounds more like you are planning to be an MTSO, which you are not ready for, possibly you could go and get some work from local doctors who dictate on tapes and such, I have several locals that I do on the side. (Tapes not the doctors - Ha!) There was a company advertising on job board WORDSRUS that paid by the minute and I know somone that they were going to hire that applied while still in school. You might check them out. Website wordsrus.net might contact them like that.
Funeral services
I agree. I personally did not attend my first funeral until I was in my mid 20s, even when my beloved grandmother died, it was her wish that we "kids" not attent (age 12 at the time). I have never forced my own son to attend as a child either. I now feel obligated to attend services for husband's family, etc but always dread the whole ordeal, even for just a distant relative, etc. Grateful that my parents also will not be having formal services, just simple cremation. You must do what YOU feel is right for your child and your own situation.
funeral etiquette
She is not too young but it would not be good to force her to go. My children went to family funerals with us but we live in the south and are not catholic, do not have a lot of set rituals, just a few songs, some words from a minister, about the person who died and what they meant to the family, closing with prayer and the "last look" at the body. Family and close friends usually go for a short interment ceremony at cemetery . Funerals here are almost always open casket. usually the preacher tells the family they need to prepare for the day when they will be "in the box" forgive the way I put it but that is what they do. The first time we took kids with us, I talked to them and told them what to expect re appearance of the deceased etc. Maybe you could talk to her and explain that this is the last time she will "see" grandmother in this life. If other children are going, she would not want to be the only one that doesn't. However I don't know that much about catholic funerals and if you and your husband agree, that is the main thing. If anyone is rude enough to try to tell you how to run your life in this area, tell them that your husband and you agreed on this. Hope this helps.
Another funeral question...
Any suggestions for different/easy foods to take to widowers? I know when we have had deaths in my family, we are overwhelmed with cold cuts, and the widow works at the bread factory, so I'm sure she's good with that! I need to go over there tomorrow, so whipping something up would be in the midst of working, and that's why it needs to be something relatively easy. I appreciate suggestions.
Seems like everybody's passing nowadays. :(
re: funeral food
Casseroles and quiches are easy, reheat well, and you can use the throwaway pans. There are a million recipes online.
Scotland, with bagpipes at my funeral. nm
NM
Funeral etiquette question for you. sm
Hubby's mom has passed away. Our daughter is 11. She went to my mother's funeral last year and did okay. She insisted on going as she was close to my mom and she was given the decision because of her age. It was also a graveside, closed casket service.
She was never that close to hubby's mom and it's going to be an open casket Catholic funeral with visiting hours at the funeral home, etc. She does NOT want to go. I have some people saying that she has to go as she is the granddaughter and others saying that she is too young for this type of service.
In one way I think that children need to deal with things so that they can mature. Hubby is neutral on this issue as well.
What do you all think?
worked in a funeral home
I used to be a secretary in a funeral home and this is not uncommon at all. Its been years ago, but I think a family would contact the funeral home and the funeral home would then get in touch with the cemetery and make the necessary arrangements with them. I think as far as costs go it was just the opening and closing of the plot. Like I said it has been well over 10 years that I worked there, but call the funeral home and they should be able to take it from there. Hope this helped.
I think I cried more than at my own dad's funeral!! Am I horrible?
nm
Transcription For Funeral Homes
Hi
Does anyone know for sure what type of medical transcription funeral homes would use? I don't think they would be autopsies, but someone told me they utilize this service.
Any advice is appreciated.
Thanks....Kymee
The funeral home generally does
not hire MTs. The forensic pathologist hires the MT. You can ask the funeral home for a list of their doctors.
never ever force anyone to attending funeral rituals, but especially a child who does not want to go
nm
forgot to say we had to go out of town for funeral a couple weeks after our new
nm
I can speak from experience, when I was 11-yr, I had to attend my great-uncle's funeral and it wa
an open casket service. Coming from a predominantly Catholic family, I was told that I had to pay my respects. I can only tell you of the nightmares that I had for the next 2 weeks after that. If she doesn't want to go, don't make her. If the other family members feel it is unacceptable, that is their problem. There are always other ways to pay respect.
|
