Not due to divorce, but our family went their
Posted By: Similar experience on 2005-09-17
In Reply to: Family broken up - Wondering
separate ways after both of our parents died. Strange, because I always thought we were close before that, but it could have been wishful thinking.
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- Family broken up - Wondering
- Not due to divorce, but our family went their - Similar experience
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Each state has different divorce and family laws; however, sm
ex-hubby is not entitled to anything after the date the divorce was filed. So, if she filed for divorce on January 1 and hit the lottery on January 2, he gets nothing!
At least that is how it is in PA. Don't know about other states.
Me too. Been there, done that, got the divorce.
.
For those of you who have gone through a divorce...sm
My husband and I have decided to go our separate ways after only 2-1/2 years of marriage. I have no idea where to start and what to do because we bought a house together, bought a new car together, have credit cards together, etc. This is a mutual decision for both of us to end our marriage so it's not like it is a bitter divorce or anything. We would like to NOT involve attorneys but how do we separate all of our stuff?
Thanks
You have a point there. I wonder if it's the divorce?
It's like Tom Cruise not aging well also. And have you seen Robert Redford? OMG. His face is ravaged with time and his neck..... terrible. But you get Paul Newman he he does look better as he ages. Guess it's in the genes?
He was my divorce attorney
.
My attorny put in my divorce that I have to take him
to court to enforce any part of the divorce agreement, he has to pay fees for both of us. To the best of my understanding, it's very difficult to have something changed once it's been a legal and binding contract in a divorce. The judges normally stick to what the original agreement was. Good luck.
Well, if it's due to divorce, you DEFINITELY want an actual
real estate agent. You are thinking of the money you think you could save, but what it will end up turning into is a bigger mess. If you sign a 60 or 90 day contract with a for sale by owner agent (i.e. Help-U-Sell, Assist2Sell, BuyOwner) and all they do is plunk a sign in your yard and give you a lock box then you're not getting much. They don't do a lot of advertising other than on their own website and they might print a few flyers for you.
With the market soft right now, unless you price the house really low just to get rid of it, expect it to sit for 90 to 120 days.
when I got a divorce -- see message
Whe I got a divorce my husband tried to make me put a price on my small business and there basically was no value as most of my clients would probably not go with a new owner. Most of the value was in my computer, printer, etc. which after a year is worth nil. It is mainly an income and not much else as you cannot quarantee that when you sell that your clients will go with the new business. Sometimes it can be valued at a one month income. There are real estate agents that sell businesses and she can check with them to see what they say. I worked for a small MTSO that sold and what they did was to not tell any of the clients that it was being sold, ran under the same name with some of the same people there and it went okay but that is touchy. You are selling more the name of the business than anything else. Again, she needs to contact a real estate agent that specializes in selling businesses. She is selling her client list and name mainly and hoping that they all go with the new owners which is a gamble and not one I would take. Good luck.
She hasn't filed for a divorce yet -
Because the state she lives in does not recognize legal separation, she had an agreement drawn up by her corporate atty. This agreement handed the house (quick claim deed) and business over to her, while her "future ex" draws his pension and moved to warmer weather (California). This all happened when things were friendly. Now she wants a divorce so she can get on with her life (with her new beau she is buying the house with). BAD idea since she has not filed for a divorce. Anyway, thanks everyone. I think I'll be visiting her in jail.
I guess I was wondering how a divorce could have been
the agreement or been before the judge with your lawyer to dispute something in the agreement. People with nothing to dispute rarely have to appear, as they have already signed the documents that the lawyer presents to the judge. I don't know if you signed your portion of the agreement without having read it to ensure your wishes were followed...hope you find some resolution.
And they say divorce is less traumatic on adult children....
Unfortunately, this is NOT the case. Adult children whose parents divorce quite often end up just as you have described. They are old enough to form their own opinions which are quite often colored by their life experiences and how they relate to each parent as an adult with adult biases and opinions. Divorce, regardless of the age of the children, always affects the children and people who are "waiting until the kids are grown" are only deluding themselves.
This is not illegal in most states. Sometimes it's in the divorce agreement.
nm
I needed to divorce cheating DH of 27 years. This was
xx
You need to join a divorce support group. Look around. Helped
zz
Divorce will be final in 2 wks, can I stay on my ex's health insurance?
My ex is willing to leave me on his health insurance. Is it legal to do this? Will we get ourselves in trouble if he doesn't take me off?
How true, mine is trained quite well....before we married he asked if I would ever divorce him -
abused me in any way. So far so good after 9 years. He admits to cheating on his first wife a couple of times though as she did not like having sex (not the reason of their divorce and long before I met him which was 2 years after his divorce). He is germaphobic so it's amazing he ever cheated in the first place....but I think he was actually trying to get her to divorce him (subconsciously)....took 12 years for it to work though. Luckily they had no kids. She did not want kids either, at least not then. She has since remarried too (a month after he did) and her 2 sons are very close in age to my 2 girls. Weird. Men can be such weenies though. Now to just train him to throw out his used paper towels instead of leaving them all over the kitchen counter (my dad does the same thing too). Oh well.
I'd hire an attorney and do a quickie divorce. They're cheap and well worth it.
If it's uncontested the attorney can help you amicably sort through what needs to be split and do it fairly and according to the laws of your state. This will avoid potential problems later.
After divorce, child chronic illness, involuntary job change, parents illnesses and death, was force
I frequently regret it, the changes it has made to my life, but when life hands you horror, at least there is this "final solution" to your financial situation. I must admit, I sleep better, and I can finally hold my head up, and I no longer feel hopeless. Find the attorney you can work with,get your free consultation and DO WHAT HE TELLS YOU TO DO. If you have doubts, see a 2nd and a 3rd attorney, till you're comfortable with the person you choose.
family is family wheter 3 or 8 sm
i live in MA and $1200-$1400 a month is what good health insurance costs, ie $20-$40 copays. it was just passed into law that if you live in MA you have to have medical insurance so without being self-employed, you can go right to BCBS etc and get a plan directly from the major health insurace companies, but for a family plan and a decent income bracket, forget it. the prices are outragous. right now my husband pays $120 a week for family plan and this is after his employer pays 30% of the total cost. we have $20 copays, but we have a $2000 individual deductable per year with a $4000 family deductible cap. so when my daughther needed her tonsils out, $2000 and when my son broke his arm, $2000. someone on this board has to be able to tell you what they pay for insurance through their company as an employee. good luck.
your family
What kind of shelters were you in that they did not help you? If your husband is mentally ill, cannot hold down a job and provide for his family, go to Social Security office and start filling out for SSI or Disability. It is a long drawn out process, but worth it, if you want to keep your family intact and safe.
Well, every family is different, but for us (sm)
When we initially signed with them three years ago, we were a family of four with a husband with hypertension and hypercholesterolemia. The first year our rate was $340/mo with a $750 deductible. Every year since then we are given the option of either jacking our payment or increasing our deductible. We are now a family of five, and we are paying $750 a month with a $1750 deductible (per person). We have no maternity coverage, baby #3 was paid for out of pocket. Prescriptions are $10/30 after a $500 deductible (because of my husband's medications, otherwise I don't think they usually require a deductible for prescriptions). Each of us is allowed four office visits per year at $25/each. Well baby care is sporadic, depending on the mood of the adjuster that day, I think. We have gotten stuck paying for a $700 ER bill (applied to our deductible, apparently) and several well baby visits (at about $200 a pop). Overall, I was thrilled when we were paying $340 a month, but now I'm ready to start looking elsewhere. I would go for it, you're going to get jacked every year wherever you are. I think what put us over the edge was baby #3 (unplanned), but I wouldn't trade her for anything of course!
Family
I have often said that if I met some of my family on the street and were not related often wonder if I would "like them" let alone "love them" but because they are family we are obligated to instantly "love them." Sorry to me blood is not thicker than water and my friends and part of my family are very dear to me and I would do anything for them as it has been a two way street with friendship and love. Lover your parents though and do anything you can for them.
Patti
not me, my family gets along
doesn't fight Hmmmmm- I'm not invited anywhere this year- Do you suppose its me??? HA
The other family
Kym and I remain friends. She hates to watch the reruns as much as I do. We both agree that they did a lot of manipulation as far as the show goes and the editing process. She and Hallmark divorced following the show and I have not had any contact with him at all.
Family of 5
1. Me, although, my husband always pulls out the towels and washclothes and folds them and my 5-year-old loves to fold washclothes and can fold them better than me.
2. Me.
3. My husband does them most of the time because I always have to sit down after supper and work some more.
4. My husband does most of the mowing.
Since you know the family,
perhaps you can tell us what happened to him?
About my family
grown and out of the home but I worked at home when they were younger and made it very clear no work, no money, simple as that. I did not get into this job to work from home, in fact worked years away from home doing same because it was not a "home job." If you want to work from home, don't complain about what you are unable to do in your "profession" when you don't come across as being professional doing all the household duties. I started in this because I knew I loved the medical field, fast typist and knew possibility of making more money, nothing to do with just a job to stay home so I could watch after kids, cook or clean. Married but hubby is gourmet chef so he cooks and I have housekeeper. I work because I happen to love the type work I do.
Your family
Well, I would tell you to get a new family, but that's too flip because I know you are hurting.
Why do you care so much about such a thoughtless remark by your father? Obviously, he has no real understanding of your situation. You are working several jobs, wife, mother, caregiver, etc., plus your MT work.
Just try to let go of he hurt and anger from your parents' lack of understanding (or deliberate undermining of you, whichever it is), and just keep putting one foot in front of the other. Give yourself a huge pat on the back because you more than deserve it!! Stay positive about yourself and your situation and things will work out to your advantage. Let go of the need for approval from your parents, because you probably won't get it and you don't need it anyway, really.
You should like a great person to me!
what does your family think?
are you going to want to work at home while attending school, and if so would you want to keep the account you have now, and how do your kids feel about it?
Not in Canda but family is. sm
Happy Canada Day to you!
My Grandmother moved to Maine from Cape Breton, Nova Scotia to go college here, where she met and married my grandfather. I have a huge family there that we visit every few years. Beautiful place, beautiful people.
friends and family to appreciate me at my job?
I doubt you're getting raises and I doubt you use your money for "others" and you as well are a poor judge of character. This initial post was about supervisors interacting more with their MTs so we can put a face with the name and feel like we have someone in our corner, being that we are so remote from coworkers. Obviously, we disagree, lets agree to do that much. You just sit and type away and collect your paycheck.
I like this one. We have some family pictures, but
those are for everyone, not just for her birthday. I do have some restaurant gift certificates, so I think I'll take her out to lunch. Thank you for all of the suggestions.
I have family in San Antonio, TX and
they have evacuees housed in shopping malls and old A&P grocery stores.
My family's clothing donations were turned down. Evacuees told them they only want money and ready for this....HAIR PRODUCTS!!!
Go figure!
Family broken up
Does anyone else live with this experience? After my mom and dad split up (after us kids were grown), all the siblings went their separate ways and really do not have much to do with each other. Most of them (three brothers) have taken sides, (either mom's or dad's) but we have nothing to do with each other. Is this odd or usually the norm? 
Family dysfunction
I feel for you too. Same here. I have 6 sisters, and only 2 are talking to me. I'm the oldest and I was very close to the middle sister who is a family therapist (go figure). We never fought before but 4 years ago she pounded on me for revealing to another sister where she spent Thanksgiving and then all hell broke loose! Since then it caused a chain reaction with the other sisters and now I'm not spoken to ever again. Considering they were always fighting with each other and I was the only one who never got involved in their petty fights, it amazes me. Sure it hurts too. What hurts more than anything is that I have a 28-year-old wonderful son who had nothing to do with this and they won't speak to him either! At this point, I feel like they are gremlins and I've tried in the only way I know, by communicating and asking to sit and talk and get it all out like adults - not even a response. So, oh well. At this point their silent speaks volumes. I too am feeling that if anything happens to me, I would not want them at my funeral services. I just can't figure them out.
I'm not NRA either, but most of the males in my family
are outdoorsmen. We've always got fresh fish and game meat. Being raised on game, I think it tastes better than beef or other meats from the grocery store. Plus, you never know what the grocery stores do to the meat. There was a hidden camera news report of a grocery store that soaked expired meats in a bleach water solution and repackaged it for sale. You never know if some lazy person is going to drop the meat on the floor and package it up anyways. At least in processing our own meat, we know where it came from and how it was processed.
Our state needs hunters because the deer and elk overpopulate. They damage crops and run loose on the highway causing human deaths. I would never hunt personally, but I do need to feed my family. Our freezer will be full again soon with a side of beef and a deer.
My family likes my
No, you are the one with issues - Why does your face look like vomit? Are and the administrator of this board twins?
My family happens to like when I give them diarrhea covered bottles for Xmas!
Hey SnowBunny - is that JW's family?
Prayers are being said!
The Addams Family nm
xx
I'm not going to visit my family either.
They wanted me to take five days off of work and the other huge project I'm working on now to fly to visit with everyone at a luxury condo where they're all staying. That was fine. I was willing to work extra so I could have enough money for the condo rental and restaurant meals. (Everyone else is somewhat well-off with fewer kids than I have. They take frequent trips on holidays.)
Daddy dearest had to get involved and basically told me it would be too much trouble for me to go. I'd have to find a ride to and from the airport because he wasn't going to pick me up in in his rental car. Husband, aunt or taxi cab could have done it. I'd have to share a bathroom and sleep on the hideabed because my cousin was bringing her boyfriend so there wasn't enough room for me. This boyfriend isn't even related, and this event is a birthday celebration for my brothers. If anyone should be there, it should be me, not my cousin's latest bedfellow! Then Dad told me that I shouldn't be wasting money on trips when I've got a family, bills to pay, and that huge project. That's really none of his business. It's not like I'd go bankrupt over a few hundred dollars. He also said I shouldn't leave my kids because who would watch them. That's what my husband, AKA the kids' father, does. It's called parenting. Dad has also chewed me out no less than four times over the arrangements for this trip because obviously I'm too stupid to handle making my own reservations, never mind the fact that I've traveled all over the country by myself since I was 15 years old.
The last time I vacationed with my parents and brothers, my father made it completely miserable. He was bossing me around, treating me like a child, asking me about my finances, and criticizing everyone around him. Then he had the audacity to tell me in front of everyone that I was eating like a pig and was going to end up weighing 300 pounds. All I had eaten that day by 5:00 p.m. was one piece of wheat toast, one hardboiled egg, a cup of coffee, water, and a small handful of raw almonds. Then he lectured me for 20 minutes on the fat content of nuts and the virtues of diet and exercise. Like he should talk. Yeah, well, we've obviously got issues, too. I don't care, I'm not ruining my holiday worrying about it. I'm not going. I don't want to be separated from my own family when my husband and kids weren't even invited. I don't want to put up with Dad's attitude. He's made it clear that I'm not welcome. He tells me I'm stupid for doing things all the time, but I'm the first one he calls when he needs help with something.
$85 on each kid, $15 on other family members, nothing for DH and I.
10 members of DH's family (by drawing), 6 members of my family, 3 kids. About $500 total on gifts, then Christmas dinner, postage, and other stuff. I wish we didn't participate in the big family gifts because it's always just an exchange of things nobody wants or needs. I can only use so much bubble bath and scented candles in a year.
A very very small family.
z
Does she have family you can contact?
I had a former coworker say something completely bizarre to me one day. It turned out she had an undiagnosed brain tumor and she passed away soon after. Saying things completely out of context can be signs of other neurological problems, early dementia, stroke. I have no first-hand experience with bipolar, though.
I agree to this one! And I thank them that they are there so I can be here w/my family!! nm
;
Personally, when my family gets together sm
since my folks passed away, nobody is allowed to get drunk during get togethers. Call me antisocial, but there's a time and place for that and Christmas get togethers, in my books, are not the place for that. I tell them to save it for New Year's and do it by themselves. Now, my oldest boy is supposed to be here on Christmas Eve and he stated he is going "out with the guys" on Christmas Eve and will probably be "tanked up" when he comes over around 9. Guess what. I told him to stay home and come over the next day when he's sober. My dad could be a teetotaller, but he was always a Coke and Sprite guy on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day (nothing mixed in, either). He always said alcohol took away the fun.
Can you get a refund on your family??? LOL
Come to Texas!! Just the two of us (me and my roomie) and the pups, turkey, football, no rugrats this year (we're doing family Christmas tomorrow).
Seriously, sharing the Word is one thing, condemning others is God's place not a humans. Tell him you're engaged! Then, break the "engagement" the day AFTER Christmas LOLOL.
your family accepts this?
I've been an MT over 10 years, have to work the holidays that fall on my scheduled day of week to work, usually Thanksgiving, and they know this. Yet, they take it personally, get upset with me and do the behind the back talk she's "antisocial" thing. Why can't they accept it as fact? I do NOT get PTO, NOR holidays. I believe a comment made this past Thanksgiving when everyone went up north was "sorry you feel you have to work." Its like, who are you people? Calling them family would be a stretch.
God bless you and your family.
x
That's been a hit with my family this Christmas, too.
Everybody bought Sudoku books for everyone else. Oh, well. The kids are actually doing puzzles, reading and Sudoku instead of playing video games.
Maybe some...but my family doctor SM
loves his Transcriptionist and told me he doesn't know what he'd do without her. He says he misses her terribly when she's on vacation and doesn't want her to ever retire. :) He always speaks so fondly of her. Maybe I should make an appointment in April and casually mention MT week...maybe he'll send her a card and a gift. :)
I'd love to transcribe for a doc like him someday.
Chickadee
inmate in family
Prisoners do not and I repeat do not process mail, or mail order catalogs or credit card info. All post office personnel in a prison are fed employees, not paid by the state. Also, if you think inmates live better then you do, you need to do your homework - very little heat, no air conditioning ( in southern states), not enough food, not proper medical care, etc. I have lived this for a long time and I can honestly say I am an expert in this field of knowledge.
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