I should also add that you have to
Posted By: More to say on 2006-07-13
In Reply to: If you were "privileged and blessed" ...sm - casey
consider your family too. When considering moving my Dad back in with us, I have to be honest that I was a little afraid. I have small children and although he was doing okay (just okay) on his own and wasn't a danger to himself or others, he was becoming forgetful and I feared he could head towards being so forgetful as to leave on the stove or to go out in the middle of the night or do something that could be a danger to us as a family. It's a VERY hard thing to decide what you are capable of and not. Also, if you have to take care of their physical needs like we did with my Dad. That's unbelievably hard, to change your parent's undergarment, wash them, etc. I helped with it but never did the full job alone. It wasn't that I was grossed out or anything, it's just that I knew in my heart and by looking in my Dad's eyes that it would be harder and more heartbreaking for him to have me do that than for me to actually have to do it. Meaning, I could tell that he didn't want me to have to go through that. Fortunately, I either had DH with me (who was fabulous and who my Dad actually preferred over my brothers even to help him with that stuff) or he just didn't need changing the nights I stayed. It's a difficult thing to do, but if there's mental confusion and that stuff it's even harder. Fortunately my Dad was lucid, only thinking every once in awhile that he'd just been to movies or something which he hadn't. It's not something to enter into lightly and you have to figure out what you can handle and/or know when you can't handle it any more and need help. And if you have siblings, they HAVE to share in the help.
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