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I might be cynical, but it sounds to me like--sm

Posted By: ks on 2008-02-13
In Reply to: How would you handle clinic notes coming up missing after you've delivered them to the facility? - MissouriMT

someone is trying to set you up to be the scapegoat. Perhaps they are looking for someone else to do the dictations, or want to bring it back in-house, if someone there is complaining about it. If that is not the case, suggest they get the reports returned via FTP or some encrypted method. That way, they can print out their own and if they are lost, it is their fault, not yours. good luck.


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You are cynical.
You always think that about everybody on this board. You must be a mass murderer or something. You are always suspicious.
714 Things to Be Cynical About
 














714 Things to Be Cynical About

By Rick Bayan

 

If you still have any illusions that "all is for the best in this best of all possible worlds," you're about to lose them right here! Read my personal list and enjoy the bitter pleasure of cynical commiseration.


Be warned: it's a LONG list. If you have to break for dinner or electroshock therapy, I'll understand. (Just use the handy numbers to remember your place in the list, so you can pick up where you left off.)


As long as it is, my list only scratches the surface. If you're not too depressed by the time you reach #714, be sure to add your own contributions to the public list.


 


  1. leaders
  2. followers
  3. outlaws
  4. lawyers
  5. backstabbers
  6. brown-nosers
  7. yes-men
  8. middlemen
  9. alpha males
  10. women who try to be alpha males
  11. good ol' boys who become president
  12. bimbos who become celebrities
  13. all other celebrities
  14. prima donnas
  15. dictators
  16. people who take dictation
  17. workaholics
  18. slackers who pretend to be workaholics
  19. slackers who don't pretend to be workaholics
  20. hypocrites
  21. charlatans
  22. MBAs
  23. mindless office drones who get promoted to management
  24. conformists
  25. nonconformists
  26. poseurs
  27. people who use pretentious French words
  28. bores
  29. boors
  30. weasels
  31. barracudas
  32. pedophile priests
  33. leeches
  34. internal parasites
  35. investment bankers
  36. old-money snobs
  37. new-money snobs
  38. fashion snobs
  39. food snobs
  40. health-and-fitness snobs
  41. "I'm hipper than you'll ever be in your dreams" snobs
  42. upwardly-mobile career snobs
  43. "team players"
  44. negotiators
  45. the fine print
  46. broken contracts
  47. overbooked flights
  48. canceled concerts
  49. annulled marriages
  50. returned gifts
  51. recalled automobiles
  52. planned obsolescence
  53. knowing that your two-year-old $2000 computer is now a mere toy
  54. $500 electronic handheld organizers that are almost as efficient as $30 loose-leaf organizers
  55. 27-year-old Silicon Valley millionaires
  56. computer literacy replacing literary literacy
  57. computer viruses
  58. software bugs
  59. unfathomable computer video games that are instantly mastered by subliterate pre-adolescents
  60. the values instilled by video games (if it gets in your way, nuke it)
  61. thinking about a future society run by people nurtured on video games
  62. watching helplessly as a full day's work is eaten alive by your PC
  63. watching the hourglass hang for two, three, four minutes
  64. "application has stopped responding to the system"
  65. "server does not have a DNS entry"
  66. spending three hours on the internet in a futile search for information
  67. the fact that you could have obtained the information in three minutes by opening a book
  68. the proliferation of websites featuring naked people exchanging bodily fluids
  69. the fact that those websites are more popular than yours or mine
  70. spam! spam! spam! spam!
  71. losing half our free time to internet addiction
  72. losing most of our day to meaningless work
  73. having to play office politics
  74. having to play golf with your superiors
  75. the term "superiors"
  76. the term "subordinates"
  77. cubicles and other sensory deprivation cells
  78. people who thrive in cubicles
  79. people who thrive on 14-hour workdays
  80. people who take their cell phones on vacation
  81. "A" students who end up working for "C" students
  82. "It takes money to make money"
  83. "It's not what you know, it's who you know"
  84. the "power words" used on resumes to impress employers
  85. the fact that employers are impressed with power words on resumes
  86. college graduates who have to settle for a job at Blockbuster
  87. the salaries of liberal arts graduates in the business world
  88. the miseries of liberal arts graduates in the business world
  89. prostituting yourself for less than a prostitute makes
  90. staying at a job you detest because the alternatives are even worse
  91. people who get promoted on the basis of the right shoes or haircut
  92. people who get promoted because they resemble their vice president
  93. executive bonuses that exceed your annual salary
  94. the "fast track"
  95. the "glass ceiling"
  96. being underemployed
  97. being overworked
  98. being reprimanded
  99. being ignored
  100. being framed
  101. being demoted
  102. being moved into the hallway
  103. watching everyone but you rise to the level of their incompetence
  104. the annual incomes of CEOs
  105. the writing ability of CEOs
  106. multimillion-dollar "golden parachutes" awarded to dismissed CEOs
  107. the practice of terminating veteran employees a year before retirement
  108. the term "terminating"
  109. "leveraging"
  110. "targeting"
  111. "impacting"
  112. calling downsizing "rightsizing"
  113. downsizing profitable companies for the sole purpose of wooing investors
  114. the fact that investors reward companies for downsizing
  115. the fact that companies now exist primarily to woo investors
  116. bonuses and stock options for executives who "trimmed the fat"
  117. diet plans -- all 2,178 of them
  118. joggers who perform ostentatious stretching exercises in public places
  119. fitness zealots who carry hand weights when they walk
  120. self-infatuated bodybuilders who know all their muscles by name
  121. health-food fanatics who faint at the sight of a cheeseburger
  122. health-food fanatics who smoke
  123. anorexia nervosa (just put the food in your mouth and CHEW!)
  124. restaurant patrons who send back perfectly edible food to impress their dinner dates
  125. snippy waiters who would rather be snippy actors
  126. waiters who tell you their name, call themselves "servers," and expect a 25% tip
  127. waiting half an hour for a salad
  128. waiting twenty minutes for your check
  129. fussy, oily yuppie cuisine
  130. anything with pesto sauce
  131. "herbed" anything
  132. "fruited" anything
  133. anything with ingredients that require you to consult a glossary
  134. gated communities
  135. $600,000 yuppie homes on 1/4-acre lots
  136. yuppie parents jockeying to get their child into a prestigious nursery school
  137. the growing gap between haves and have-nots
  138. doctors marrying doctors
  139. lawyers marrying lawyers
  140. men marrying men
  141. computer geeks marrying computer geeks
  142. professional jargon: the Tower of Babel revisited
  143. the fact that people expect you to understand their jargon
  144. "newspeak"
  145. "groupthink"
  146. "Big Brother is watching you"
  147. totalitarianism
  148. mass movements
  149. mass media
  150. mass murder
  151. mass marketing
  152. telemarketing
  153. the pathetic scripts read by poor underpaid telemarketing agents
  154. saying "yes" so we don't hurt the poor underpaid telemarketing agent's feelings
  155. junk mail
  156. the time we spend sorting through junk mail
  157. the fact that junk mail is written by people who wanted to be writers
  158. "Urgent: Reply Requested!"
  159. "You may already have won!"
  160. "If you're the winner, we will say MR. OCCUPANT HAS WON $9,000,000.00!"
  161. "A special offer exclusively for Mr. Occupant"
  162. "No strings attached!"
  163. "FREE GIFT!"
  164. "FREE TRIAL OFFER!"
  165. televised trials
  166. medieval trials (if you drown, you're innocent; if you float, you're guilty)
  167. the irrelevance of the truth in all trials
  168. jury rigging
  169. plea bargaining
  170. murderers acquitted because their side had smarter lawyers
  171. innocent people sentenced because the OTHER side had smarter lawyers
  172. convicted murderers paroled after serving six months of a life sentence
  173. prisons that offer free education, VCRs, and complimentary mints on the pillows
  174. legal loopholes
  175. divorce settlements (both spouses lose; both lawyers win)
  176. lawsuits by people who spill coffee on themselves
  177. lawyers who encourage lawsuits by people who spill coffee on themselves
  178. the absurd amounts of money awarded to people who spill coffee on themselves
  179. the absurd amounts of money awarded to lawyers who prosecute lawsuits by people who spill coffee on themselves
  180. the cost of private medical care
  181. the tyranny of managed medical care
  182. the inefficiency of public medical care
  183. dying during a tonsillectomy
  184. the fact that your death will be referred to as a "negative patient healthcare outcome"
  185. health insurance companies that force hospitals to release patients as soon as the anesthesia wears off
  186. health insurance being denied to the people most likely to get sick
  187. health insurance as a capitalist enterprise
  188. health insurance that covers 80% of a $500,000 medical bill
  189. having a heart attack two days after your health insurance expires
  190. the effects of age and gravity on the human body
  191. shrinking from your original height
  192. going senile
  193. losing control of your bladder as a reward for reaching old age
  194. drugs whose side effects are worse than the disease
  195. cancer: opportunism incarnate
  196. dandruff
  197. gout
  198. flatulence
  199. herpes
  200. psoriasis
  201. Alzheimer's disease
  202. Tourette's syndrome
  203. St. Vitus' dance
  204. hemorrhoids
  205. chronic sinusitis
  206. yeast infections
  207. athlete's foot
  208. gum disease
  209. crotch rot
  210. mad cow disease
  211. elephantiasis
  212. crabs
  213. male-pattern baldness
  214. irritable bowel syndrome
  215. having to worry about your blood pressure and cholesterol
  216. the fact that worrying about your blood pressure and cholesterol will probably raise both of them
  217. the fact that virtually everything that tastes good can kill you
  218. subsisting on granola only to find that it contains more saturated fat than two Big Macs
  219. the wretchedness of heart-healthy diets (we are not RABBITS!)
  220. regaining more weight after a diet than you lost during it
  221. people who watch their fat intake and keel over at 47
  222. people who eat lard, smoke two packs a day, and live to be 97
  223. the likelihood that the survivors were also much HAPPIER during their long lives
  224. suspecting that you'll be more like #221 than #222
  225. the smugness of lucky people
  226. the smugness of high-school in-crowders
  227. the even worse smugness of art-world in-crowders
  228. the empty pretentiousness of most modern art
  229. performance artists: street loonies with foundation grants
  230. artists who gain attention by exhibiting their own bodily excretions
  231. artists who pass off collections of scrap metal as sculpture -- and have them deposited on idyllic college campuses
  232. artists who decorate an empty canvas with one horizontal stripe
  233. art critics who see profound meaning in an empty canvas with one horizontal stripe
  234. movie critics who give rave reviews to bad films so their names will appear in newspaper ads
  235. critics who call every passable film or play a "masterpiece"
  236. critics who trash a film, play or book for the chance to turn a clever phrase
  237. designated bestsellers stacked four feet high in the bookstore window
  238. good books going out of print because nobody knows about them
  239. nondescript chain bookstores driving out quirky independent bookstores
  240. celebrity authors who earn more for one ghostwritten book than 100 editors make in a year
  241. the state of publishing today
  242. the state of Nevada
  243. sleaze
  244. bogus fun
  245. bogus ANYTHING
  246. breast implants
  247. sex-change operations
  248. bad toupees
  249. good toupees
  250. blazing white dentures
  251. used-car dealers
  252. chain letters
  253. pyramid schemes
  254. people who refer to pyramid schemes as "multi-level marketing"
  255. euphemisms like "differently abled" and "mentally challenged"
  256. oxymorons like "military intelligence" and "corporate culture"
  257. "Catch-22" situations; e.g., "you can't get a job unless you already have a job"
  258. millionaire ballplayers who grumble about their salaries
  259. artificial turf, polyester uniforms, costumed mascots and other tackiness on the field
  260. team owners who fire managers for losing the World Series
  261. free agents who jump from team to team like hungry fleas
  262. boxers who bite off their opponents' ears or other body parts
  263. "great white hopes" = great white dopes
  264. college football teams made up of convicted felons
  265. pro football players who either strut ostentatiously or pray ostentatiously each time they score a touchdown
  266. female sports reporters allowed into men's locker rooms
  267. male sports reporters allowed into women's locker rooms (as if!)
  268. sports teams with singular names; e.g., the Utah Jazz
  269. sports teams with absurdly incongruous names; e.g., the Utah Jazz
  270. sports parents who browbeat their kids for screwing up on the field
  271. asinine chants of "We're #1!" (Americans always have to be #1)
  272. sports fanatics who live vicariously through their teams
  273. nerds who live vicariously through "Star Trek"
  274. anyone who lives vicariously through any soap opera
  275. celebrity worship
  276. wealth without taste
  277. taste without wealth
  278. shamelsss celebrity promotional vehicles like "Entertainment Tonight"
  279. John Tesh, shameless composer
  280. "Candle in the Wind"
  281. eulogies delivered by clergymen who didn't know the deceased
  282. how we forget good people after their deaths and remember Attila the Hun
  283. Gresham's Law: the bad drives out the good
  284. the worldwide triumph of cockroaches
  285. the worldwide triumph of rats
  286. the worldwide triumph of American popular culture
  287. absurd foreign imitations of American popular culture: Russian nightclubs, Czech rock groups, Japanese jazz bands, Turkish soap operas
  288. the profitability of bad taste
  289. the bad taste graveyard: disco, leisure suits, velvet clown paintings
  290. pinkie rings and gold chains on wealthy building contractors
  291. bad art in hotel/motel rooms
  292. the fact that those bad artists can afford to stay in hotels with GOOD art
  293. romance novels with Fabio on the cover
  294. Elvis and Princess Diana collectibles
  295. the fact that the majority of autographed sports collectibles are fakes
  296. the need to purchase separate shoes for walking, jogging, tennis and basketball
  297. selling advertising space on anything that doesn't move and some things that DO (buses, stock cars, Olympic athletes)
  298. people who sell cemetery plots or penny stocks over the phone
  299. ingenious high-pressure sales tactics that make us feel stupid if we say "no" and even stupider after we say "yes"
  300. buying things on sale: spending money to save money
  301. annual "going out of business" sales
  302. people who spend an hour clipping coupons so they can save 87 cents
  303. receiving Christmas catalogs in August
  304. discovering there's no Santa Claus
  305. the ugly, insanely popular, hard-to-obtain toys that parents must buy to appease their children
  306. the fact that parents NEED to appease their own children
  307. cheap toys with hundreds of dollars worth of accessories to buy
  308. toys merchandised as movie tie-ins
  309. the licensing of dead celebrities
  310. people who gain an identity by wearing t-shirts with commercial logos
  311. "As seen on TV!"
  312. the bewildering success of home shopping channels ("Who would ever watch nonstop commercials?," asked the cynic)
  313. infomercials for psychic hotlines, motivational tapes, exercise machines and baldness remedies
  314. people who have nothing better to do at night than watch infomercials
  315. people who promise they'll call but never do
  316. people who complain because you promised to call but never do
  317. people who ask "How are you?" but don't really want to know
  318. people who make you miserable
  319. the fact that you ALLOW people to make you miserable
  320. that luck is definitely a factor in getting what you want
  321. that you can make your own luck but nobody tells you how
  322. being unlucky in love
  323. being unlucky in the stock market
  324. stocks that plummet after you buy them
  325. stocks that go through the roof after you sell them
  326. having to pay your broker a commission on losing stocks
  327. the fact that your broker has no incentive to sell you WINNING stocks as long as you pay a commission on losing stocks
  328. the fact that the entire economy of the free world is in the hands of gamblers
  329. lotteries
  330. sweepstakes
  331. church bingo
  332. casinos
  333. Wall Street, the world's biggest casino
  334. that American Indians have to operate casinos to survive
  335. Las Vegas
  336. lounge acts
  337. Frank Sinatra after 1970
  338. pop music after 1970
  339. life after 1970
  340. striving
  341. giving up
  342. promises
  343. betrayals
  344. excuses
  345. prejudice against fat people
  346. prejudice against dark-skinned people
  347. prejudice against excessively stupid and excessively intelligent people
  348. prejudice against people with big noses
  349. prejudice against ugly women
  350. prejudice against gentle men
  351. "all men are created equal"
  352. "the pursuit of happiness"
  353. chronic disappointment
  354. expecting rewards in the hereafter
  355. the apparent indifference of God
  356. the possibility that God is a myth
  357. the possibility that God is a crank
  358. the possibility that God is a jokester
  359. the prevalence of unbelieving theologians: NOT a good sign
  360. the perverse intelligence of inanimate objects that roll just out of reach
  361. boxtops that tear as you open them
  362. paper grocery bags that tear when they're full of glass jars
  363. toilet paper that tears as you use it
  364. price labels that won't come off without tearing the product
  365. plastic bags you have to open with your teeth
  366. "twist-off" bottlecaps that rip your fingers
  367. VCRs so complicated that you need an engineering degree to program them
  368. 500 channels and nothing you want to watch
  369. electronic gadgets that come with incoherent instructions written by well- intentioned Asians
  370. major appliances that break down two days after the warranty expires
  371. traffic lights that are programmed to turn red as soon as you arrive from the previous red light
  372. picking the shortest line at a toll booth or supermarket checkout -- and watching the others pass you by
  373. playing by the rules and watching the outlaws pass you by
  374. man's treachery toward his fellow-creatures
  375. raising and nurturing good-natured cows, pigs and chickens so they can become DINNER
  376. killing rhinos for their horns
  377. killing elephants for their tusks
  378. killing baby seals for their fur
  379. killing employees for their productivity
  380. the National Rifle Association
  381. the fact that it's easier in the U.S. to obtain handguns than Cuban cigars
  382. the oil cartel
  383. U.S. alliances and wars motivated by the sweet smell of oil
  384. the tobacco industry profiting from the slow suicides of smokers
  385. people who start smoking to be cool, then sue tobacco companies when they develop lung cancer
  386. the fact that tobacco ever caught on in the first place ("Why would anyone stick burning leaves in his mouth?," asked the cynic)
  387. the fact that tobacco is more profitable than book publishing
  388. the fact that nearly ANY industry is more profitable than book publishing
  389. exploitation of resources, including human resources
  390. the term "human resources" (we are not BAUXITE!)
  391. billion-dollar sportswear companies that profit from exploiting child labor
  392. clear-cutting the rainforests to make room for McDonald's beef cattle
  393. excessive hysteria over snail darters and northern spotted owls
  394. insufficient hysteria over the approaching extinction of tigers, pandas, gorillas and other first-rate mammals
  395. Greenpeace (skip the '60s poetics -- just tell us what you do)
  396. war
  397. Pentagon spending habits; e.g., $640 toilet seats and $76 screws
  398. the contractors who charge $640 per toilet seat and $76 per screw
  399. being drafted
  400. boot camp: sadomasochism as a character-builder
  401. being expected to die for a country you can't locate on a map
  402. bombing the wrong village
  403. being killed by "friendly fire"
  404. being killed one day before the truce is signed
  405. being hit by a bus one day after returning to civilian life
  406. the raunchy brutality of urban life
  407. drug pushers
  408. street gangs
  409. rapists
  410. carjackers
  411. slumlords
  412. racketeers
  413. panhandlers
  414. muggers who shoot you for a cigarette or a pair of sneakers
  415. welfare mothers raising FUTURE welfare mothers
  416. welfare fathers who sire six children by six different women
  417. ghetto dwellers blaming their problems on racism
  418. middle-class blacks encountering REAL racism when they move out of the ghetto
  419. the fact that most stereotypes contain a grain of truth that keeps them alive: emotional Italians; smart, aggressive Jews; hot-blooded Latins; beguiling, hard-drinking Irish; disciplined, regimented Germans and Japanese; inbred rednecks
  420. not being allowed to say that blacks have rhythm or superior athletic skill -- despite all the compelling evidence in their favor
  421. not being allowed to talk about Jewish cultural influence -- despite the likelihood that the 20th century will be remembered as a Jewish Renaissance
  422. the fact that Jewish sensitivities may have been conditioned by 2000 years of nonstop anti-Semitism
  423. "Some of my best friends are [fill in the blank]"
  424. the fact that every oppressed minority group likes to think it suffered more than every other oppressed minority group
  425. Holocaust museums, AIDS quilts and other public statements of victimhood
  426. the fact that we still NEED Holocaust museums, AIDS quilts and other public statements of victimhood
  427. symbolic protests with live people masquerading as dead bodies
  428. demands of amnesty by whining political agitators (if you don't want to be arrested, don't commit a crime)
  429. '60s radicals who used the Vietnam War as an excuse to promote Marxism
  430. '60s radicals who became Wall Street tycoons
  431. '60s radicals who still wear tie-dyed shirts and sandals
  432. liberals whose friends are exclusively upper-middle class
  433. conservatives whose friends are exclusively upper-middle class
  434. capitalism
  435. communism
  436. socialism
  437. fascism
  438. commericialism
  439. terrorism
  440. male chauvinism
  441. female chauvinism
  442. plagiarism
  443. optimism
  444. Freudianism
  445. psychoanalysts who keep their patients coming back for 20 years
  446. patients who still hope for a cure after being psychoanalyzed for 20 years
  447. group therapy: a less expensive cure that doesn't work
  448. electroshock therapy: a quicker cure that doesn't work
  449. finally going crazy
  450. psychiatrists who are crazier than their patients
  451. finding happiness only after getting a lobotomy
  452. being labeled a "former mental patient" for life
  453. "sensitivity" training and other forms of brainwashing
  454. psychobabble: the standardization of introspection
  455. codependency and other pop-psychology concepts designed to sell books
  456. the fact that there wouldn't be so many self-help books if any of them worked
  457. anyone associated with the O.J. Simpson trial who wrote a book
  458. O.J. Simpson
  459. 20-year-old Hollywood starlets who form their own production companies
  460. Hollywood agents of any age
  461. the "A" list for Hollywood parties
  462. the people who decide who's on the "A" list
  463. Hollywood movies after "Star Wars"
  464. blockbusters
  465. sequels to blockbusters
  466. bad movies based on old TV shows
  467. the fact that those bad movies become blockbusters anyway
  468. Julia Roberts, highest-paid film actress of all time
  469. The fact that the highest-paid actress used to be Demi Moore until Julia Roberts replaced her
  470. the fact that it would take the average U.S. worker more than six centuries to earn what the top male stars receive for one film
  471. the fact that Michael Ovitz received five times that much when he was fired from Disney
  472. the fact that Michael Eisner received more than five times as much as Ovitz in ONE DAY, when he cashed in his Disney stock options
  473. the symbolism of Pia Zadora buying and demolishing Pickfair, once the grandest mansion in Beverly Hills
  474. overreliance on special effects in mainstream Hollywood films
  475. too much @$&#*!% profanity in mainstream Hollywood films
  476. knee-jerk contempt for religion in mainstream Hollywood films
  477. knee-jerk contempt for Hollywood by the religious right
  478. films that depict Jesus as a blue-eyed Nordic
  479. "To him that hath, more shall be given"
  480. the old-boy network
  481. the tendency of high-school in-crowders to become adult in-crowders
  482. being snubbed by the in-crowd because of your looks, clothes, taste in music, or weird family
  483. being snubbed by a friend in the presence of in-crowders
  484. teachers who embarrass you in front of the entire class
  485. students who embarrass teachers in front of the entire class
  486. homework in every subject
  487. teachers' pets
  488. the worship of student athletes (except in cross-country, wrestling, golf and fencing)
  489. cheerleaders
  490. the importance of being selected as a cheerleader
  491. parents who murder cheerleaders who were selected over their own kids
  492. wanting to be considered cool: the root of all teenage vices
  493. the inexplicable vogue for multiple pierced body parts, including tongues
  494. peer pressure (ask any lemming)
  495. being taunted for being virtuous
  496. having to worry that you're gay if you're still a virgin at 18
  497. having to think your entire future will be determined by your college board scores
  498. being rejected by your #1 college
  499. being rejected by your #2 college
  500. being rejected by every college except your "safety" school
  501. being rejected by your "safety" school
  502. going to your #1 college -- and hating it
  503. bickering with the college administration
  504. crass college students who major in merchandising or finance
  505. idealistic college students who major in history, philosophy or French (turn back before the world devours you!)
  506. being stuck with a roommate from hell
  507. the hell you have to go through to pledge a fraternity
  508. fraternities in general
  509. sororities in general
  510. fraternity boys who become top executives
  511. private university graduates who look down on state university graduates
  512. state university graduates who look down on state college graduates
  513. state college graduates who look down on community college graduates
  514. high school dropouts who earn more than all of them
  515. mom-and-pop businesses driven out by shopping malls
  516. mom-and-pop businesses driven out by designer boutiques and tattoo parlors
  517. what it takes to succeed
  518. motivational seminars that promise easy success
  519. the fact that the easiest way to succeed is to give motivational seminars
  520. consulting: the art of succeeding while unemployed
  521. the success of writers and artists who sell out
  522. the wretchedness of writers and artists who don't
  523. tenure for scholars: freedom to be mediocre
  524. being denied tenure
  525. semiotics, deconstructionism, and similar vehicles for academic obfuscation
  526. Afrocentrism (sorry, the Egyptians weren't black)
  527. Women's Studies (sorry, women aren't an ethnic group)
  528. the shameful exclusion of non-Western cultures from old history textbooks
  529. the overemphasis on non-Western cultures in current textbooks
  530. the term "Third World" ("How come we never hear about the First and Second Worlds?," asked the cynic)
  531. Montezuma's revenge
  532. what the Spaniards did to Montezuma
  533. trying to convert the heathens
  534. selling refrigerators to Eskimos
  535. having to call Eskimos "Inuit"
  536. having to call Burma "Myanmar"
  537. having to call Dave Barry "America's favorite humorist"
  538. the fact that Tom Cruise is more famous than John Adams or Charlemagne
  539. the fact that MTV is more famous than the 3,000-year-old nation of Armenia
  540. Planet Hollywood
  541. the Hard Rock Cafe
  542. gawking tourists who wear Hard Rock Cafe t-shirts
  543. paparazzi
  544. supermarket tabloids
  545. people who buy tabloids and complain about paparazzi
  546. Calvin Klein ads (what exactly are we selling here?)
  547. reading about the triumphs of the shallow in "People" magazine
  548. the term "beautiful people" used without irony
  549. chic: the triumph of style over substance
  550. 55-year-old celebrities who try to look 30
  551. cosmetic surgery
  552. Michael Jackson, self-made alien
  553. Michael Jackson's marriages
  554. Michael Jackson's peculiar friendship with Elizabeth Taylor
  555. Elizabeth Taylor's marriages
  556. the publicity uses of entering the Betty Ford Clinic
  557. alcoholism as a "disease"
  558. gambling as a "disease"
  559. AIDS as a "civil rights issue"
  560. the sad last days of discarded celebrities
  561. tabloids that exploit the sad last days of discarded celebrities
  562. the woes of former child stars
  563. the warped ambitions of stage parents
  564. the futile ambitions of would-be writers
  565. the fact that nobody reads literature anymore
  566. the fact that Walt Disney World is the biggest single tourist attraction in the U.S.
  567. the disappearance of classical music radio stations
  568. the perplexing success of the ugliest pop music
  569. the inevitable triumph of energy over refinement
  570. the fact that cultured men today are predominantly gay
  571. the fact that heterosexual men today are predominantly uncultured
  572. the fact that single men have to feel suspect if they're cultured
  573. men who regard women as sex toys
  574. smart middle-aged women who regard uneducated young men as sex toys
  575. middle-aged alpha males with trophy wives
  576. women who praise sensitive men but fall for alpha males
  577. men who demand that their women look like Barbie
  578. women who demand that their men be "financially secure"
  579. crude, lascivious men who leer at women, make jokes about breasts, etc., etc.
  580. hip, contemporary women who leer at men, make jokes about penises, etc., etc.
  581. the comical ineptness of intellectual men in the real world
  582. the shrill fascism of intellectual feminists who denounce our rigid "phallocentric" institutions, like grammar, sex and rocket science
  583. the condescension of older businessmen toward the "little ladies"
  584. women who characterize flirtation as sexual harassment
  585. men who characterize sexual harassment as flirtation
  586. the male double standard: it's OK for men (but not women) to fool around
  587. female double standards: it's OK for women (but not men) to bash the opposite sex, have their own colleges and clubs, whine, let their spouses support them, etc., etc.
  588. the fact that everything ultimately boils down to sex
  589. the fact that sex fuels the egos of people whose egos don't need fueling
  590. kinky sex (isn't "normal" sex kinky enough?)
  591. impotence: nature's way of telling a man he doesn't deserve to get lucky
  592. faked orgasms: woman's way of telling a man he's luckier than he deserves to be
  593. potential lovers who tell you about the "great sex" they had with a previous lover
  594. current lovers who are having "great sex" with somebody else but don't tell you about it
  595. current lovers who are having "great sex" with somebody else and DO tell you about it
  596. the inventiveness of women's excuses for saying no
  597. the inventiveness of men's arguments for persuading a woman to say yes
  598. sexual starvation
  599. watching people who are dorkier than you get all the sex they want
  600. having to practice safe sex
  601. having to practice salesmanship to get sex
  602. the depth of conversations at singles bars
  603. the depth of conversations in online chat rooms
  604. the depth of conversations in most marriages
  605. spats
  606. replays of the same spats
  607. breaking up after making up
  608. being dumped by someone you love
  609. being dumped for your best friend
  610. being dumped for your mate's best friend
  611. being dumped as part of your mate's latest career move
  612. "Can't we just be friends?"
  613. watching your ex-mate get lucky while your heart is still broken
  614. searching for new mate so you have another chance to experience all of the above
  615. the lamentable decline of romance
  616. the unlamented demise of Western Civilization
  617. the survival of tuberculosis bacilli and political parties
  618. big government: a charity funded by legalized extortion
  619. taxation without representation
  620. taxation WITH representation
  621. representative government masquerading as democracy
  622. Washington insiders
  623. dinner parties for Washington insiders
  624. buying an ambassadorship
  625. foreign ambassadors with 137 parking tickets who claim diplomatic immunity
  626. backslappers and palm-greasers
  627. congressmen who sell out to lobbyists
  628. presidents who sell out to lobbyists
  629. lobbyists
  630. political cronies appointed to high office
  631. the politicians who appoint the appointees
  632. political scandals
  633. cover-ups of scandals
  634. press coverage of cover-ups of scandals
  635. the blindness of the press toward JFK's scandals
  636. the bloodlust of the press in covering Nixon's one scandal
  637. candidates for the U.S. presidency since 1960
  638. candidates for local office in every era
  639. selling favors for campaign contributions: political prostitution
  640. making impossible campaign promises: political courtship
  641. committing impeachable offenses: political adultery
  642. being impeached: political divorce proceedings
  643. photo opportunities and sound bites
  644. spin doctors
  645. mudslinging as a viable campaign strategy
  646. pollsters' and psychics' predictions
  647. corporate earnings forecasts
  648. investors who bail out of a company because it earned $1.24 per share instead of $1.26 per share
  649. companies that downsize because they earned $1.24 per share instead of $1.26 per share
  650. the stock market soaring on news of higher unemployment
  651. going on unemployment yourself
  652. mortgages and other long-term, life-sapping obligations, like marriage
  653. divorce
  654. having to pay alimony and child support
  655. not receiving alimony and child support
  656. staying single because you think the other option is even worse
  657. having to think of yourself as "unfit" if you don't propagate your genes
  658. looking at some of the people who DO propagate their genes
  659. watching a billion years of evolution sputter out when you die childless
  660. knowing that all your knowledge and experiences will evaporate when you die
  661. being dead
  662. being embalmed
  663. being displayed at an open-casket funeral
  664. decomposition
  665. eternal damnation
  666. heaven
  667. purgatory ("What's the point?," asked the cynic. "We've already been there.")
  668. reincarnation (damned if I'm taking calculus again!)
  669. past-life regression therapy
  670. aromatherapy
  671. foot reflexology
  672. chakras
  673. auras
  674. spirit channeling
  675. energy vortexes
  676. good karma and bad karma
  677. gurus
  678. false idols
  679. pop idols
  680. the artist formerly known as Prince
  681. the company still known as Microsoft
  682. monopolies
  683. landing on Boardwalk with a hotel on it
  684. not passing "GO"
  685. not winning
  686. not even breaking even
  687. the fact that virtue is rarely rewarded
  688. that the rewards usually go to the wrong people
  689. that good things don't last
  690. that bad things never go away
  691. that nothing you do in this life will matter 10,000 years from now
  692. that nothing you do in this life will matter 10 years from now
  693. that nearly everything you do is dictated by your genes
  694. that you'll never have enough time to do everything you want
  695. that everything declines eventually, including you
  696. the decline of language
  697. the decline of art
  698. the decline of decency
  699. puritanism: lusting to prevent others from lusting
  700. searching for happiness
  701. searching for kindred spirits
  702. searching for love
  703. searching for self-esteem
  704. searching for the meaning of life
  705. searching for a flashlight with live batteries
  706. searching for answers
  707. never finding the answers
  708. not wanting to find the answers
  709. realizing that the answers will always elude you if you search for them
  710. knowing that you're still clueless after all these years
  711. realizing that all the wise men, philosophers and self-help authors were clueless, too
  712. knowing that the world is going to fall apart eventually
  713. not caring if the world falls apart
  714. "whatever"
© 1997-2001 by Rick Bayan. 

oh my gosh, Cynical, you and I must have had the same boss - sm
She told me a monkey could do my job. Needless to say, that two and a half monkeys are now doing the job with fewer docs and fewer patients. When I had that job, I ALONE WORKED 40 HOURS for 5 physicians, 3 midwives, and did some other odds and ends pertaining to my job. I was told a monkey could do my job.

The practice has gotten much smaller, fewer clinicians, and the job that I once held alone is now being done by 2-1/2 people. Go figure!!
You wouldn't believe the excuses we hear, so I think it makes us cynical even when sm
we don't want to be. We have had MTs lie about their mothers dying, husbands dying, even had two that had relatives notify that they themselves had died, all of which were not true.

We get told that someone was in an accident (find out later it was a lie), told that someone's dog had to be put to sleep (felt bad but found out they never had a dog), even told that their father died. She forgot that she used that one the previous year too.

We have had heard about severe storms with power outages when the MT did not know that another MT lives 2 blocks away and told us of sunshine when we asked how she was working through the storm.

We have been told that someone's husband was being deployed, when the truth is that he was not even in the service.

We have been told that an MT's husband beat her up and that she was at the ER right at that moment, but caller ID said that she was calling from home. When questioned, she explained about the "glitch" with caller ID being mixed up IN THE ENTIRE CITY OF SEATTLE.

See what we mean?
Sounds like you are SM
working for one of the few remaining good companies.  Wouldn't it be wonderful if they all at least made an effort to even out the work?  When you factor in VR and the number of newbees that some companies hire, who just don't have the experience to do the difficult dictators, that makes a sorry life for those who do have the experience and can do it.  Which is why I say if "anyone" isn't happy with what they are doing, then they should look for a company that recognizes their MTs as human beings.  I think part of the problem is that the bigger companies are run by "suits" who don't have a clue about actual medical transcription, all they see is the bottom line and any way to make that bottom liine bigger is fine and dandy with them.  I even heard one of those "suits" say once that it didn't matter if all their MTs quit, they were just typists and the manager could just go out and hire some more.
Sounds like you have too much going on. Take

things in little bits.  (Un)pack/clean for 15 minutes and then work for a bit.   Set a realistic goal to work - say an hour that you can make yourself work, then get up and (un)pack/clean, do laundry, etc. and then come back and work.  If you can afford to work a few less hours do it.  It will give you time to complete the move and give you a break from work.


We are remodeling/redecorating and our house is total chaos.  Some days I can jump right in and get something accomplished and other times I put on blinders and just ignore it all.  Some days I dig right into work and knock out my lines, other days I'm on-line more than working.


Take a break, get refocused, and then try out different routines.  I think we all go through burnout at least once a year and sometimes it takes a bit to get refocused. 


 


Sounds about right
x
Thanks, sounds like just what I need.

It isn't that I can't afford either, just concerned that I don't want a 2 year process, because I need to start living now.


I don't need to know particulars, but just wondered how far back your trauma went?  Mine is pretty much a lifetime of traumatic events, but I think most of my issues date back to when I was 5. 


sounds like
Pfannenstiel scar
now this sounds better..
nm
Sounds like...
We need to take what THEY say with a huge chunk of something, and it sure ain't salt! Talk about "The Stepford Transcriptionists." Sheesh. Thanx for ur input - it was driving me nuts!
sounds like there
may have been a problem with their server.  Try it one more time.  If you get the same error page, click the 'refresh' key at the top of your screen to see if this brings the page up.  If it doesn't, you should call someone.
Sounds like MDI
Who do you work for - -if you don't mind saying.
Sounds like what I'm looking for.....
Thanks so much for the replies!
Sounds like my son. sm

My son had an economics project in junior high school. The class was split into groups. Each group was given $75.00 in cash and told to come up with something to make their money back. If they made any profit, it was theirs to keep and split.


My son went through all of the grocery store flyers until he found cans of Pepsi on sale. Then he called all of the pizza places to see if he could get a buy 1 get 1 free special. They bought a bunch of pizza and a bunch of Pepsi, set up a table at lunchtime,  and sold the pizza for $1.25 a slice and the cans of soda for $1.00 a can. They doubled the money, gave the original $75.00 back and split the rest.


Right now my son works in food services at a nursing home. I'm surprised he doesn't charge the residents for delivering their dinners.


Must be. Sounds just like them
nm
Sounds like PMC to me...
 
Sounds like they set you up to

No one can be 100%... 98.8 should be congratulated (IMO) Drs. make mistakes in dictating even.. they aren't 100%.


This sounds like an ad to me.
nn
Actually, it sounds like the old one is
nm
This sounds about right!
A Japanese company and an American company decided to have a canoe race on the Missouri River. Both teams practiced long and hard to reach their peak performance before the race. On the big day, the Japanese won by a mile. The Americans, very discouraged and depressed, decided to investigate the reason for the crushing defeat.

A management team made up of senior management was formed to investigate and recommend appropriate action. Their conclusion was the Japanese had eight people rowing and one person steering, while the American team had eight people steering and one person rowing.

So American management hired a consulting company and paid them a large amount of money for a second opinion. They advised that too many people were steering the boat, while not enough people were rowing.

To prevent another loss to the Japanese, the rowing team's management structure was totally reorganized to four steering supervisors, three area steering superintendents and one assistant superintendent steering manager.

They also implemented a new performance system that would give the one person rowing the boat greater incentive to work harder. It was called the "Rowing Team Quality First Program", with meetings, dinners and free pens for the rower.

There was discussion of getting new paddles, canoes and other equipment, extra vacation days for practices and bonuses.

The next year the Japanese won by two miles. Humiliated, the American management laid off the rower for poor performance, halted development of a new canoe, sold the paddles and cancelled all capital investments for new equipment.

The money saved was distributed to the Senior Executives as bonuses, and the next year's racing team was outsourced to India.

Sounds like she does not know what she is doing.
Maybe your company does not pay much for QA or have high criteria
It sounds like......sm
It sounds like they are basing this on income only, not income and output (her bills). She should talk with the folks at Social Service as they can probaby negotiate a better deal for her, either there or somewhere else.

Good luck! :)
sounds like....
the other poster's Stedman's and mine conflict a little. Mine is:
Stedman's Orthopaedic & Rehab Words, Third Edition (1999) so her's may be more up-to-date.

So, share with us what you said and what QA said. I'm curious!!!!
Sounds like my ex also.....sm
very abusive...mine wasn't that controlling, but he was disrespectful to me and did lots of things to hurt and humiliate me, to the point of double dating behind my back with his oldest daughter and her boyfriend, and on our anniversary to boot. I am out of that mess, met a much nicer guy who is secure with himself and am happier because of it.
Sounds like you seriously need to consider the
How do I know if I am in an abusive relationship? What are the signs and symptoms of an abusive relationship?

The more of the following questions that you answer Yes to, the more likely you are in an abusive relationship. Examine your answers and seek help if you find that you respond positively to a large number of the questions.

Your inner feelings and dialogue: Fear, self-loathing, numbness, desperation

* Are you fearful of your partner a large percentage of the time?
* Do you avoid certain topics or spend a lot of time figuring out how to talk about certain topics so that you do not arouse your partner’s negative reaction or anger?
* Do you ever feel that you can’t do anything right for your partner?
* Do you ever feel so badly about yourself that you think you deserve to be physically hurt?
* Have you lost the love and respect that you once had for your partner?
* Do you sometimes wonder if you are the one who is crazy, that maybe you are overreacting to your partner’s behaviors?
* Do you sometimes fantasize about ways to kill your partner to get them out of your life?
* Are you afraid that your partner may try to kill you?
* Are you afraid that your partner will try to take your children away from you?
* Do you feel that there is nowhere to turn for help?
* Are you feeling emotionally numb?
* Were you abused as a child, or did you grow up with domestic violence in the household? Does domestic violence seem normal to you?

Your partner’s lack of control over their own behavior

* Does your partner have low self-esteem? Do they appear to feel powerless, ineffective, or inadequate in the world, although they are outwardly successful?
* Does your partner externalize the causes of their own behavior? Do they blame their violence on stress, alcohol, or a “bad day”?
* Is your partner unpredictable?
* Is your partner a pleasant person between bouts of violence?

Your partner’s violent or threatening behavior

* Does your partner have a bad temper?
* Has your partner ever threatened to hurt you or kill you?
* Has your partner ever physically hurt you?
* Has your partner threatened to take your children away from you, especially if you try to leave the relationship?
* Has your partner ever threatened to commit suicide, especially as a way of keeping you from leaving?
* Has your partner ever forced you to have sex when you didn’t want to?
* Has your partner threatened you at work, either in person or on the phone?
* Is your partner cruel to animals?
* Does your partner destroy your belongings or household objects?

Your partner’s controlling behavior

* Does your partner try to keep you from seeing your friends or family?
* Are you embarrassed to invite friends or family over to your house because of your partner’s behavior?
* Has your partner limited your access to money, the telephone, or the car?
* Does your partner try to stop you from going where you want to go outside of the house, or from doing what you want to do?
* Is your partner jealous and possessive, asking where you are going and where you have been, as if checking up on you? Do they accuse you of having an affair?

Your partner’s diminishment of you

* Does your partner verbally abuse you?
* Does your partner humiliate or criticize you in front of others?
* Does your partner often ignore you or put down your opinions or contributions?
* Does your partner always insist that they are right, even when they are clearly wrong?
* Does your partner blame you for their own violent behavior, saying that your behavior or attitudes cause them to be violent?
* Is your partner often outwardly angry with you?
* Does your partner objectify and disrespect those of your gender? Does your partner see you as property or a sex object, rather than as a person?

This sounds like a little boy to me *S*....not fun (sm)

Sounds like my dad, X, and I would not put up with that s**t for long.  Blessings to you.


 



That sounds like what I was having. sm
It is from sitting too long in one position. I am working now on daily exercise on a treadmill to keep the deconditioning and to promote circulation.

I also found that if I keep my bed at an incline like they suggest for obstructive sleep apnea, that this helps quite a bit.

It also helps to do calf stretches before you go to bed and application of Ben-Gay has helped me in the past, too.

Massage the knots out until the muscle is back smooth when they occur. This will hurt a bit, but it helps in the long run.

The above is not a quick fix, but it certainly helps.

This sounds like the same -

company I work for.  What are the initials of the company?  I may be able to help you.


It sounds like you may
have some issues with depression and/or anxiety. Maybe too much isolation? Maybe you should speak to your doctor. I'm not saying this to be mean, I'm being serious. If the very simple act of people laughing makes you tense up, that is a serious problem.
I will have to try that - sounds like fun. nm
x
Sounds like....
you've become    a clone of Dr. Phil
sounds like there's a lot you don't know...
sounds to me like you are going off half-cocked.
sounds just like.....dum da dum dum....nm

sounds to me like
someone with some serious personality issues.
Sounds like you are
handling the situation well. I'm glad your hubby told his friend to LEAVE HIM OUT OF IT! Good move.

I have to say, I think I would be tempted to anonymously let *wife* know she needs to check up on her poor-excuse-for-a-husband. Hmmmmmmmmm. Anyone could have seen the guy leave the bar in that chicks car. Probably less stress to stay out of it, but knowing about it would probably eat away at me. That is just wrong.
Sounds to me like something is going

on.  Hard to believe they don't have the money to pay you.  Even harder to believe they really want work held on to that long. It sounds like she might be trying to ease you out without have to say the words.  If you are happy with the job, hang in there. But, I would look for something else just in case.  Maybe in the time it takes for something to happen you can have some pretty good leads on good jobs.


 


GOOD LUCK


Okay! Sounds like fun!
I'll bring the Margaritas!
Sounds low to me...
At 6 cents per line, if you transcribed 200 lines per hour, which is unlikely if you are a new MT, you'd make $12 an hour. When I first began MT, I was only doing 100 LPH for quite a while, which meant at this rate I would have only made $6.00 an hour!

How fast do you transcribe?
That sounds right..
I have my "business" name, just never did anything but buy the domain name. :-) Thank you! I'll be checking come Monday.
Sounds as if...
You are working on VR. The pay can be the $1000 you want every 2 weeks. I worked VR and made even less than what you are making now per line, 40 hour week, had the speed as fast as I could make it and if you are extremely fast, able to make that amount on a 40 hour week basis, been there, done that.
it sounds like... SM
If you are typing and nothing is showing up, then your "window" is not active. On your system and/or your version of Word I dont know just why that might happen, but something else on your computer probably becomes "active" and deactives the Word window.

Do you have other programs running? Maybe in "background?" Can you disable or "quit" those?

Other than that, my PC at work will do this to me too when Word does "autosave" of the current document and the normal template. However, it does alert me by popping up a dialog box and it is never 2-3 sentences.

not much help, I'm sure...hope you can find out!
Sounds like--sm
you still may have the virus, or it already did some damage before it was caught. This is why I don't like Norton's. They are a good program but they consistently miss things. I use PC-Cillin by Trend Micro. If you go to their website, they have a free scanner called Housecall, I believe. I think it will find it for you and remove it. If that does not work, and you care to spend a small amount of money, $30, I believe, get Spyware Doctor through PC Tools. It is a very good program and consistently finds things that the regular antivirus programs do not. You have to renew once a year, but that is only $20, I think. Another good program is CrapCleaner. It is free to download and run. There are two areas to scan..applications and issues. run them both. This will really clean out your history, cookies, etc. I use it weekly. Registry Mechanic is also good, at $30, as it cleans out stuff from your registry. I have all of these programs, as I have learned that one virus scanner is not enough, especially Norton's. I am not knocking them. I used them for six years, but found they did not find or completely remove everything. In this business, we have to protect our computers to the highest extent, and I just did not feel that Norton's was good enough. JMO and good luck.
Sounds very low to me. I would never
accept a setup like that. It would have to be a flat rate per hour with me. That flat rate would have to be averaged with the two jobs that I do, the QA and the training. I would offer to o it for no less than $25 an hour and probably closer to $30 particularly if it is an IC position.
Sounds like you were right where I am now.
I think I might take the plunge, after the new year. I'll be looking for deductions then. :-)

Thanks for your reply.
sounds like YOU are
sticking up for the foreigners, just what WE NEED! I am skilled and qualified, but I, like everyone else NEEDS to ACTUALLY MAKE a living with the prices of EVERYTHING out there being SKY-HIGH! I do not make ANY benefits, but I do make a very decent wage, but that is the ONLY way for anyone to make it in this country, anymore! So take your laptop with YOU - I just work my 40 hours. I have another life, also, not just ALL WORK.
It sounds like so much fun (sm)
LOL - I know, I'd love to see Richard Simmons too!  It's a thought at this point in time, but I know I would enjoy it.  Putting faces with people we've been in contact with through the years would be worth a million.  Have fun!
Well it sounds like you should be

It actually sounds like you should be one of the CEOs.  Please, come down off of your high horse.  I have way more years of education and didn't find the need to attend college to become an MT.  I have 18 years of experience, and even if I was doing QA, I would have to have more patience.  I actually have my own accounts and the doctors have nothing bad to say.  My work doesn't need QA as I am the QA.  This is not to say I do not make a mistake now and again.  To err is human.  I certainly would not go on a message board and act greater than thou.  If you were an MT for 13 years, I am sure you had your fair share of leaving blanks.  Don't forget that we were only limited to reference books for a long time.  There was no such thing as Google.  A lot of these MTs you QA are probably fresh out of school or else they wouldn't be working for a national for such low rates.  A lot of MTs with the experience and education you speak of do have their own accounts or own their own MTSOs.  I've seen a lot mistakes, errors, and all kinds of things of this same sort you and the other posters speak of, and these kinds of mistakes are made by physicians who have a heck of lot more education than you or I.  So please, have some faith in humanity. 


Another thing, none of us know working for these national companies if we are working for any of the ones that offshore or QA for an offshore MT.  You only hear about it on this message board or maybe if the company has it on their website.  None of us are in the back pockets of these nationals every minute of the day.  All companies have other interests especially foreign ones.    JMO. 


That sounds
a
Sounds to me like they set you up

Maybe they were told to reduce personnel or they are starting to outsource overseas.


Don't give up. Not all employers are like that. And even seasoned transcriptionists have doctors they have difficulty with. One of the most difficult-to-understand doctors I have transcribed for was Irish.


Sounds like you are doing everything right to me- sm
I actually put a small windchime on our door from the garage (it has a small hook on it), so whenever anyone comes in, and I can hear that someone came in the door even though I have head phones on. If I don't think it is my DH/kids I can always look out the front and see who it is; if it is not family/friend, I can bold out the slider in the bedroom if necessary. Its nice to have, my primitive alarm system. I try to teach our two kids not to open doors, etc. but they are still learning. We are rural too, but have relatively close neighbors but I still lock all the doors, etc. during the day when I am home alone and at night. First thing we did when we moved in here was put key deadbolts on all the doors. We have little or no crime here too, but every now and then a home invasion happens, but 9/10 the people being robbed have large amounts of cash in their house (we don't) and the word got out via friends, whoever, and they get robbed. So it is definitely not the norm; as well as very, very few robberies. But never say never, right. Your DH is right about the locked door, but he doesn't realize it buys you time to get out, if someone gets in because you can hear them banging the door down. If they just walk in quietly you are dead meat basically and at their mercy, not a good position to be in. Stay Safe!