I dodged a bullet with someone like this..

He was 5 years younger than me, moved in with me as I own a home.  When he wasn't working making little over minimum wage at Jiffy Lube with no future aspirations, his behind was planted on my sofa.  Before he moved in he had all these plans on what he wanted to do with his future, go back to school, better job, etc., but the longer he stayed the more lazy he got.  I don't mind doing the yard work, I had been doing it for 6 years before he came into the picture, but when somebody tells you they are going to do it tomorrow, then tomorrow, then tomorrow and it gets to be a foot high it's like telling a kid to do his chores.  He would only get up to do the lawn after I got the mower out, emptied the bag, put gas in it, and started it up.  All that was left to do was push it across the yard, and then that is when all of a sudden he is in the mood to mow it.  Same with rolling the garbage bins out to the curb once a week. Again, no big deal unless you have to do it after somebody else says they are happy to do it but don't actually go through with it.

He also had three kinds, two from one woman and one from another.  He was so far behind on his child support from the youngest one he could never see her.  The mother of his other two kids (one of which was actually his, one of which he took responsibility for before her birth) made a deal with him that if he religiously paid her $360 a month by the first of each month, she would not go through the courts as they would take much more out of his check.  He couldn't even follow through with this one simple thing for his kids, so she took him to court and then 50% of his checks went to child support.  This is all because he was too lazy to go get a money order and a stamp. 

This is all stuff I found out after he moved in with me.  It was like he just gave up and was coasting on my sofa.  With his modest salary and half of it being taken out, we certainly were not getting ahead financially and I was living with a big lump on the sofa in front of the TV.  After four months, I gave him his ring back, and a week later he was living with his mommy again.  Had I known some other things I found out after he left, I would have kept the ring and had his things packed up for him with the locks changed when he got home from work.  I'm just glad I didn't actually marry him. 

• Poll: Who is unhappily married - thinkingofleaving
  • I dumped my ex 20 years ago, but got lucky 13 years ago - Been there
  • interesting - texan
  • I am ...sm - mommaK
    • have/had the same story - here's what I did - MommaV
    • oops..."hurry UP and wait" NM - mommaK
  • married since 03 and pregnant now sm - Sorta newlywed
    • I dodged a bullet with someone like this.. - anon
  • second time. I had 2 children, he had none. - anon
  • I just left after 16 years of marriage. Hardest decision I've ever made, but something that I ha - to do... SM
    • Don't leave us in suspenders! What's the DH doing without you? - Good for you!
      • He calls me daily whining that he doesn't have any money. Then calls me names when I - refuse to send him SM
    • There are worse things in life than being alone. - pillar of strength
    • awsome story - good for you ! nm - thinkingofleaving
  • Unforttunately marriage problems tend to follow you into the next marriage...sm - anon
    • who is doing this twice? *lol*...sm - huh? *lol*
      • most do, though. - nm
        • yes, I agree.....usually The Needy!....nm - huh? *lol*
  • I left 16 years ago and am ecstatic still..sm - Need to feel complete without a man...sm
    • I agree, self sufficient women definitely do not need a man! nm - sm
      • it wasn't luck, my friend.......sm - Need to feel complete without a man...sm
  • Unhappily married? - sm
    • I agree about the kids....AND - sm

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