I'm not going to visit my family either.
Posted By: you can come to our house! on 2005-11-03
In Reply to: Family holiday plans (sm) - Read this one ~
They wanted me to take five days off of work and the other huge project I'm working on now to fly to visit with everyone at a luxury condo where they're all staying. That was fine. I was willing to work extra so I could have enough money for the condo rental and restaurant meals. (Everyone else is somewhat well-off with fewer kids than I have. They take frequent trips on holidays.)
Daddy dearest had to get involved and basically told me it would be too much trouble for me to go. I'd have to find a ride to and from the airport because he wasn't going to pick me up in in his rental car. Husband, aunt or taxi cab could have done it. I'd have to share a bathroom and sleep on the hideabed because my cousin was bringing her boyfriend so there wasn't enough room for me. This boyfriend isn't even related, and this event is a birthday celebration for my brothers. If anyone should be there, it should be me, not my cousin's latest bedfellow! Then Dad told me that I shouldn't be wasting money on trips when I've got a family, bills to pay, and that huge project. That's really none of his business. It's not like I'd go bankrupt over a few hundred dollars. He also said I shouldn't leave my kids because who would watch them. That's what my husband, AKA the kids' father, does. It's called parenting. Dad has also chewed me out no less than four times over the arrangements for this trip because obviously I'm too stupid to handle making my own reservations, never mind the fact that I've traveled all over the country by myself since I was 15 years old.
The last time I vacationed with my parents and brothers, my father made it completely miserable. He was bossing me around, treating me like a child, asking me about my finances, and criticizing everyone around him. Then he had the audacity to tell me in front of everyone that I was eating like a pig and was going to end up weighing 300 pounds. All I had eaten that day by 5:00 p.m. was one piece of wheat toast, one hardboiled egg, a cup of coffee, water, and a small handful of raw almonds. Then he lectured me for 20 minutes on the fat content of nuts and the virtues of diet and exercise. Like he should talk. Yeah, well, we've obviously got issues, too. I don't care, I'm not ruining my holiday worrying about it. I'm not going. I don't want to be separated from my own family when my husband and kids weren't even invited. I don't want to put up with Dad's attitude. He's made it clear that I'm not welcome. He tells me I'm stupid for doing things all the time, but I'm the first one he calls when he needs help with something.
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Don't visit now, visit inJuly/Aug to get....
an idea of what the weather is like. It's DISGUSTING in the summer. Great if you like a 100 degree steam bath.
Visit Epicurious.com (nm)
Well, we don't have a choice when we visit...
It is an offer my husband's company is making. I live in Houston, so 100 degree weather is nothing new to me. I love the summer and I love the beach, so none of those reasons would keep me away. I am looking quite forward to it to be honest. It is beautiful there, at least the area we will be living in.
Visit www.whyquit.com (nt)
You would do well to visit the New MT board...sm
and some of the company boards here. MT isn't what it's advertised to be and it isn't what it used to be. There are definitely some challenges to the field from EMR and offshore that aren't going to go away. We are seeing job loss already. So know that it will be even more difficult to get into MT than it was 20 years ago and also that the future of MT is much more shaky than even 5 years ago. I'm in school working for a degree so I have something to do when it collapses. You will be wise to look through the above boards I mentioned (and archives) to get a feel for what is going on...
Visit website...
voice4dogs.org
I will warn you though...very, very graphic.
Let me tell you how I approach the visit
If going to a new physician, I have my history and physical and all other information typed out for them. If a return visit, I type out a small list noting the reason for the visit. Mine are short and sweet, first of all because if not written down, hard for me to remember and just makes it easier for perhaps a person who is on their treadmill trying to see all the patients they can and me as I don’t want to spend a lot of time there either. I heard somewhere that after about the first 4 or 5 minutes you are tuned out anyway. Why not simplify for the visit??
Doctor Visit
Actually he said they usually do 600 mg every 6 hours or 800 mg every 8 hours. He just looked at my arms and wanted to know where I felt the pain was coming from, i.e., muscle/tendon or bone. I said muscle. He asked if I had any numbness or tingling, and I said no. That was it.
Oh no! My cats come to visit me too. They
xx
It was amazing. My 2nd visit.
We were only there for 2 days in July. I got a whole week this time. My daughter lives there, in South Lake Tahoe.
I stayed at the Montblue in Nev. Very luxurious but pricey. DD got me a nice discount. The Horizon is also very nice and a little cheaper if you like the Casino thing. They also do the weekly Wifi rate there if you are going to work ($29). The Lakeside Inn is nice as well. There are lots of other smaller places too. I saw a nice Best Western that was right on the lake on the California side.
If you go, check out the Blue Water Bistro in South Lake Tahoe for a great dinner right on the water. I also really liked Sprouts (a good lunch place) which is all vegetarian organic type food. The restaurants in the Montblue are all good! 20-Four has the most awesome key lime log cake. I was trying to figure out a way to bring some home with me.
I drove the whole 70 some miles around the lake. Tahoe City is really a beautiful little town. My favorite spot was Sand Harbor. Of course Emerald Bay is just beautiful too.
I say go!! It is the off season right now probably til Thanksgiving or so when ski season gears up. Then things slow down again around April/May before all the summer tourists. That is when you can get your best rates.
Visit this website - it has SAVED me! - sm
I came across "FlyLady"... it is actually a website "family" that HELPS get this time and CHAOS under control. Things DO get out of control, and it slowly kills us inside... depressing us. This website helps you take control of your time, sets up 15 minutes a day ONLY to work on your "zones"... one week you are in the living room, then maybe the master bedroom, then the bathroom and another small room.... this disaster did NOT happen overnight, and you cannot expect yourself to get it straightened out overnight. Things get out of hand, but this website family can truly help... I did it, and within ONE MONTH my household was finally manageable, and I could open my door to anyone who came to visit... my friend and her husband came to visit me after a month of FlyLady work, and her husband just said "It just feels home-y to me. What did you do?" A MAN said that, and he didn't know what I was doing. It is very cool, and encouraging, and strengthening!!! There are e-mails sent several times a day for reminders to hop up and do a 5-minute "hot spot" rescue (hot spot being a spot in the house where it seems to get out of control).... take an hour, cruise the website, it is SO much fun... and DON'T FORGET TO SHINE YOUR KITCHEN SINK!!! IT WILL MAKE YOU SMILE!!!
Like we are going to visit a board from India.
office visit in what state?
Doctor is from India. Patient is a FU on hypertension. He says She came here s/l (drasting) ??? state believing that she needed blood work. Said in plan for her to keep regular FU appointment. She was well, but don't understand what state she came to visit? Drastic maybe? Help please if you can. Thanks.
Maybe you should visit the mental health board
to discuss the topics of lonlieness and depression. You obviously have no one at home to talk to.
How many times a day on average do you visit this board?
nm
It's easy, just don't visit the main page ;)
Wow.
Anybody have to visit the hospital lately to an updated system? sm
I have gone recently for a medical problem and I am amazed how they have everything networked to different departments.
So I didn't like watching my wages go down and I now work for specialists, but it was such a nice hospital visit. I was in and out of there in no time with no waiting. It was an amazing system. And this is a large acute care hospital! I was absolutely amazed.
When I go back East to visit relatives
I am shocked that some things are a lot cheaper and briefly consider a move, but I adore the weather here. I also don't get why they send all the good veggies/fruits back there and we get left with the icky ones (unless you go to a farmer's market - which is what I try to do). Maybe the good ones survive the trip better and they figure we can deal with the shopworn ones locally.
Yep, my son's doc charged 111.00 for a 3 minute visit to tell him he had a kidney stone.
And to think the insurance paid it. Hmmm.
Yep, a visit to a cancer ward makes just about any day-to-day problem seem
s
Yes. It's expensive compared to a single visit for electrolysis but
I have found it very effective. For me it is more painful than electrolysis, but the visits are over much more quickly (takes me about 5 minutes for upper lip, chin, and cheeks). Because hair must be within the growth stage to work, it takes at least 3 visits to finish, spaced about 6 weeks apart, and you can't tweeze, depilate, or bleach while you are having it done. That includes for a few weeks before you start, or the first visit will be a waste. You can shave, which sounds odd to most people, but works just fine during the process. (You will be shaved before the treatments anyway, because the hair melts onto the skin otherwise.) No matter what the ads say, it does still work best on darker hair and light skin, because the melanin affects how the laser works. Another thing you won't hear about before hand is when used over areas of dental work there is an additional zing of discomfort. I put my tongue over the teeth in those areas, which helps some. My technician stopped providing anesthetic cream because of possible allergic reactions, but you can order it over the counter at a drug store or online. I have just toughed it out each time. My face is red for a few hours after treatment, but no burning. There will be a few strays, which they will handle as needed at a lower rate after the agreed upon series of treatments.
I think you are right. I am seeing the same things. I hope it starts soon..I love it. Will visit
nm
may be oppositional-defiant disorder? Perhaps a visit to your pediatrician would help. Also
"Oppositional defiant disorder is a recurrent pattern of negativistic, disobedient, hostile, defiant behavior toward authority figures without serious violations of the basic rights of others. Such children exhibit persistent stubbornness and argumentativeness, persistent testing of limits, an unwillingness to give in or negotiate and a refusal to accept blame for misdeeds. This behavior is evident at home but may not be manifested elsewhere. These children and adolescents do not see themselves as defiant; instead, they feel they are responding to unreasonable demands or situations. This disorder is usually evident before 8 years of age and is more common in males (until puberty, when male-female rates are equal). From Vacarolis's Foundations of Psychiatric Mental Health Nursing...
family is family wheter 3 or 8 sm
i live in MA and $1200-$1400 a month is what good health insurance costs, ie $20-$40 copays. it was just passed into law that if you live in MA you have to have medical insurance so without being self-employed, you can go right to BCBS etc and get a plan directly from the major health insurace companies, but for a family plan and a decent income bracket, forget it. the prices are outragous. right now my husband pays $120 a week for family plan and this is after his employer pays 30% of the total cost. we have $20 copays, but we have a $2000 individual deductable per year with a $4000 family deductible cap. so when my daughther needed her tonsils out, $2000 and when my son broke his arm, $2000. someone on this board has to be able to tell you what they pay for insurance through their company as an employee. good luck.
My sis routinely makes the 6 hr car ride home to visit with her three kids and has since they
:+
You can also visit the new forum WAHM for folks in a similar situation, too. nm
nm
Been to Brooklyn to visit friend who worked at the Twin Towers
years ago, can only hope she was not there when they fell. The friend lived in Brooklyn but I am with the above post about trendy, I heard the same thing the other night on HGTV. Are you there in Brooklyn?
Personally I would not force her to go - she can alway visit the grave site to say goodbye- sm
My mom died about 18 months ago, but has there been a funeral I would not have had my kids there (they were 6 & 4 at the time). I know my in-laws would have thought me a terrible person for that but I would not have cared (my mom donated her body to science-- my dad is too). An open casket is a lot different than a closed one and can make quite an impression on some. I just don't think that is something that should be pushed. She is old enough to make the decision, you should abide by it.
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your family
What kind of shelters were you in that they did not help you? If your husband is mentally ill, cannot hold down a job and provide for his family, go to Social Security office and start filling out for SSI or Disability. It is a long drawn out process, but worth it, if you want to keep your family intact and safe.
Well, every family is different, but for us (sm)
When we initially signed with them three years ago, we were a family of four with a husband with hypertension and hypercholesterolemia. The first year our rate was $340/mo with a $750 deductible. Every year since then we are given the option of either jacking our payment or increasing our deductible. We are now a family of five, and we are paying $750 a month with a $1750 deductible (per person). We have no maternity coverage, baby #3 was paid for out of pocket. Prescriptions are $10/30 after a $500 deductible (because of my husband's medications, otherwise I don't think they usually require a deductible for prescriptions). Each of us is allowed four office visits per year at $25/each. Well baby care is sporadic, depending on the mood of the adjuster that day, I think. We have gotten stuck paying for a $700 ER bill (applied to our deductible, apparently) and several well baby visits (at about $200 a pop). Overall, I was thrilled when we were paying $340 a month, but now I'm ready to start looking elsewhere. I would go for it, you're going to get jacked every year wherever you are. I think what put us over the edge was baby #3 (unplanned), but I wouldn't trade her for anything of course!
Family
I have often said that if I met some of my family on the street and were not related often wonder if I would "like them" let alone "love them" but because they are family we are obligated to instantly "love them." Sorry to me blood is not thicker than water and my friends and part of my family are very dear to me and I would do anything for them as it has been a two way street with friendship and love. Lover your parents though and do anything you can for them.
Patti
not me, my family gets along
doesn't fight Hmmmmm- I'm not invited anywhere this year- Do you suppose its me??? HA
The other family
Kym and I remain friends. She hates to watch the reruns as much as I do. We both agree that they did a lot of manipulation as far as the show goes and the editing process. She and Hallmark divorced following the show and I have not had any contact with him at all.
Family of 5
1. Me, although, my husband always pulls out the towels and washclothes and folds them and my 5-year-old loves to fold washclothes and can fold them better than me.
2. Me.
3. My husband does them most of the time because I always have to sit down after supper and work some more.
4. My husband does most of the mowing.
Since you know the family,
perhaps you can tell us what happened to him?
About my family
grown and out of the home but I worked at home when they were younger and made it very clear no work, no money, simple as that. I did not get into this job to work from home, in fact worked years away from home doing same because it was not a "home job." If you want to work from home, don't complain about what you are unable to do in your "profession" when you don't come across as being professional doing all the household duties. I started in this because I knew I loved the medical field, fast typist and knew possibility of making more money, nothing to do with just a job to stay home so I could watch after kids, cook or clean. Married but hubby is gourmet chef so he cooks and I have housekeeper. I work because I happen to love the type work I do.
Your family
Well, I would tell you to get a new family, but that's too flip because I know you are hurting.
Why do you care so much about such a thoughtless remark by your father? Obviously, he has no real understanding of your situation. You are working several jobs, wife, mother, caregiver, etc., plus your MT work.
Just try to let go of he hurt and anger from your parents' lack of understanding (or deliberate undermining of you, whichever it is), and just keep putting one foot in front of the other. Give yourself a huge pat on the back because you more than deserve it!! Stay positive about yourself and your situation and things will work out to your advantage. Let go of the need for approval from your parents, because you probably won't get it and you don't need it anyway, really.
You should like a great person to me!
what does your family think?
are you going to want to work at home while attending school, and if so would you want to keep the account you have now, and how do your kids feel about it?
Not in Canda but family is. sm
Happy Canada Day to you!
My Grandmother moved to Maine from Cape Breton, Nova Scotia to go college here, where she met and married my grandfather. I have a huge family there that we visit every few years. Beautiful place, beautiful people.
friends and family to appreciate me at my job?
I doubt you're getting raises and I doubt you use your money for "others" and you as well are a poor judge of character. This initial post was about supervisors interacting more with their MTs so we can put a face with the name and feel like we have someone in our corner, being that we are so remote from coworkers. Obviously, we disagree, lets agree to do that much. You just sit and type away and collect your paycheck.
I like this one. We have some family pictures, but
those are for everyone, not just for her birthday. I do have some restaurant gift certificates, so I think I'll take her out to lunch. Thank you for all of the suggestions.
I have family in San Antonio, TX and
they have evacuees housed in shopping malls and old A&P grocery stores.
My family's clothing donations were turned down. Evacuees told them they only want money and ready for this....HAIR PRODUCTS!!!
Go figure!
Family broken up
Does anyone else live with this experience? After my mom and dad split up (after us kids were grown), all the siblings went their separate ways and really do not have much to do with each other. Most of them (three brothers) have taken sides, (either mom's or dad's) but we have nothing to do with each other. Is this odd or usually the norm?
Not due to divorce, but our family went their
separate ways after both of our parents died. Strange, because I always thought we were close before that, but it could have been wishful thinking.
Family dysfunction
I feel for you too. Same here. I have 6 sisters, and only 2 are talking to me. I'm the oldest and I was very close to the middle sister who is a family therapist (go figure). We never fought before but 4 years ago she pounded on me for revealing to another sister where she spent Thanksgiving and then all hell broke loose! Since then it caused a chain reaction with the other sisters and now I'm not spoken to ever again. Considering they were always fighting with each other and I was the only one who never got involved in their petty fights, it amazes me. Sure it hurts too. What hurts more than anything is that I have a 28-year-old wonderful son who had nothing to do with this and they won't speak to him either! At this point, I feel like they are gremlins and I've tried in the only way I know, by communicating and asking to sit and talk and get it all out like adults - not even a response. So, oh well. At this point their silent speaks volumes. I too am feeling that if anything happens to me, I would not want them at my funeral services. I just can't figure them out.
I'm not NRA either, but most of the males in my family
are outdoorsmen. We've always got fresh fish and game meat. Being raised on game, I think it tastes better than beef or other meats from the grocery store. Plus, you never know what the grocery stores do to the meat. There was a hidden camera news report of a grocery store that soaked expired meats in a bleach water solution and repackaged it for sale. You never know if some lazy person is going to drop the meat on the floor and package it up anyways. At least in processing our own meat, we know where it came from and how it was processed.
Our state needs hunters because the deer and elk overpopulate. They damage crops and run loose on the highway causing human deaths. I would never hunt personally, but I do need to feed my family. Our freezer will be full again soon with a side of beef and a deer.
My family likes my
No, you are the one with issues - Why does your face look like vomit? Are and the administrator of this board twins?
My family happens to like when I give them diarrhea covered bottles for Xmas!
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