Been there, done that

My abuser did worse than you are getting and no one believed me.  I tried the police/sherrif department, a private investigator, a lawyer and blew more money moving and on those people than I could afford.  I just filed bankruptcy.  He lives 1000 miles away from me and still works through my family (hey how about THAT!) to keep tabs on me.

Want to know what to do?  Here is a list:

Do you have a cell phone?  Get another one with a different company and put a password on it. 

Change banks.  Change telephone number(s).

Go to a different telephone out of your house and off your cell phone to make any personal changes like these.  Place a block on your phone that allows only approved phone numbers with a password you create and give out to people who need to reach you (you're phone company can or you can block ALL incoming calls on your home phone if you have a cell phone. 

Close your current satellite account and open a different one.

Take your computer to a repair shop and have them check your computer for spyware, etc.  Make a copy of what you need to keep from your hard drive onto a CD.  Reformat your hard drive.  Reinstall all your software as new installs and only copy from the CD things like your abbreviation software.

I did all of the above but it wasn't until I made him truly hate me that he stopped everything.  I embarrased him in front of his friends and family, pretending to be a drunk or say inappropriate things, make advances on his friends in front of him...in other words, make him see me as someone he did not want to associate with AT ALL, (not the person I really am).  I moved 4 different times and even gave up having a home at all, working out of friend and family homes or hotels with internet service for months but it wasn't until I did the above that everything stopped. 

If you really need help, check out Abeka.com as you can find out who HE is calling but getting copies of his phone bill, cell phone bill, lots of other information.  If you can prove he is doing all this, then you can get a restraining order.  If you feel he is getting someone else to do these things on his behalf, they BOTH are in violation of the order and they both go to jail.  You file a restraining order where YOU live (where the incidents happen) and give him the hassle of either driving to your jurisdiction to defend himself or default by not showing up and you get your restraining order.  Report everything.  Keep records in writing of everything in chronologic order.  Disconnect yourself from any online exchanges that can be tracked to you.  Use an anonymyzer if you have to.  Take your life back.  It took me a very long time (3 years) to get him out of my life and after another year I can say I am free.

Good luck to you (I really mean it)

d~ 

• abusive relationship ruining mt career - anon
  • Been there, done that - diddles
    • One more thing - diddles
  • Simple - Relocate where he will NOT find you! - And don't look back! Been there!
  • not sure what state you are in but there are some good new stalking laws... - MTbucket
  • YOU PLAY - YOU PAY
    • Well, I'[m sure she didn't think of that one! - Sheesh - great support!
      • I'd love to see how supportive you'd be of this person - if it was your husband she was messing with
      • That was extremely rude & uncalled for. - be more supportive
        • She is in this situation by her own choice. - and I'm sure it's not the 1st or last time e
        • Payback - Been there
          • Exactly - been there too! - sm
  • sm - Just me
  • I don't get it.....SM - Lana
    • Thank you! - 'nuf said
    • Glad I am not the only one who didn't get it. - Hmmm
  • hmm - interesting
    • I was told my a computer tech that if you have more than 1 - me
    • Good observation - see inside
  • You have to get as much evidence as you can as to - my 2 cents
    • my 2 cents too! - anon
      • Having had this happen to me I am - CMT-me

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