Agree, but there will always be young moms who want to be home

• MT obsolescence - oldie
  • I've been hearing this song for 20 years sm - Old and Wise
    • I totally agree with you. sm - MT since 1979
  • I don't think we are obsolete but (sm) - MT since 1979
    • How long is the training?,,nm - pm mt
      • if you are talking about sm - MT since 1979
  • we are definitely obsolete, and hanging on sm - Oh yeah
    • Agree, but there will always be young moms who want to be home - with kids and nothing wrong with that. Just little
    • I agree 200%. Thank you India!..sm - Bayou MT

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As I understand, daycare is a touchy subject here but I am looking for some opinions.  I have been MTing for 10 years now part time.  During that time I had my 3 kids.  With the PT hours it worked out great.  Now not too long ago I started FT (8 hrs/day). This has been since the school yr started.  My older two are in school all day.  My youngest is 2 and goes to the neighbors house. With summer coming all three will be home.  Its tough because they are 10, 8, 2, the older two argue constantly it seems.  I feel bad to have them have to take care of their 2 yr old sibling on summer break.  They all go in different directions.  I am weighing my options on what to do.  Anyone else in this situation or have any suggestions? If I were putting less hours in I would have no prob.  I understand a lot of you are able to do this with no prob, but it just doesn't work in my house unfortunately.

What about birthmothers?  I am one of those.

Lynda

This is not meant to start any arguing between anyone.  This is just my outlook.  I was raised by a single mom.  Through no choice of her own, my father decided to end their marriage to be with another woman.  I was 5 when we were kicked out of the only home we ever knew with nowhere to go.  We had to live with some friends of hers for 3 months while she saved up money to get us a place to live.  She was a nurse and worked her butt off 7 nights a week, working 60 to  70 hours a week to put food in my mouth and clothes on my back.  She went without, didnt ever have nice clothes, didnt have a social life, was the sole supporter and had to be a mom and a dad to me.  She was everything to me and what she sacrificed for me she did willingly and lovingly.  She gave up everything for herself so that I could have a bright future. 

I saw what my mom went through as a single mom.  There was no support there when the pipes broke, the car wouldnt start and she couldnt get to work, if her child was ill, if she were ill.  There was no second income, nobody to lean on. 

Through all her struggles raising me, she never was bitter and never complained about being a single mom.  But I feel that any single mother out there trying to raise children to be all they can, at the same time solely supporting the family should be regarded with a little respect.  Look how hard it is in this day to make it even as a married couple with kids. It is hard. 

If you havent walked down that road, you will never imagine how hard it is.  I think some compassion is due to that lady and her children.  Maybe not just because she is a single mom, but because at some point in our own walk, we may need some compassion sometime ourselves. 

Hi all.  I'm hoping there are a few single moms out there who can give me some advice.  I have two children, ages 15 and 11.

Background:  I divorced my husband in June.  Everything was going well financially until I lost my Independent Contractor position unexpectedly in October.  I could not find any work for a month and had no savings.

Now, I come to find out my ex will be dropping all medical coverage this spring.  He will be self-employed at that time and have no access to insurance.

AS OF THIS SPRING, my financial status looks bleak.  I have no savings, no retirement, no medical insurance and no life insurance.  I'm totally lost here. 

I have a few options:  I could stay self-employed and buy all of my insurance, etc.  I could work when I wanted and be home with my kids, attend their school functions, and so on.

I could get a full-time MT job in an office with full benefits, etc.  However, my kids will be alone on vacations and in the summer.  They may need to forego some school functions and may need to stay at home alone when they are sick.

I've been self-employed now for almost 8 years and the kids and I are very used to it.  I hate to give it up, but, I do need to do what I have to.

Any advice?

Mine are grown, but the grandchildren occasionally are over.  The oldest one will play his Gameboy or some cube thing all day and only occasionally ask to be fed.  However, when the youngest one can't go do daycare for some reason my world is turned upside down.  The granddaughter has it in her head that when I ask her to be quiet it means come over to my desk and whisper.  All in all, it isn't too often that I have children in my house when I work.  My hat is off to those of you who do it on a regular basis, you are queens of organizational/concentration skills. 

I know I've heard of a mouth swish home remedy that can be swabbed inside the mouth to numb the area.  If anyone knows what I'm talking about, PLEASE post!

Thanks in advance,

Exhausted Mama

out there who don't have close contact with their kids in this group, that I feel very fortunate when mine want to talk to me.  My daughter (19) and I are very close and she still lives here, and sometimes I really do have to cut it short with her.  However, my son lives away from home, and when he does stop by and wants to talk, I definitely stop and listen.   

Now, with that all being said, I definitely know what you mean about all this talking and listening cutting into the overall production for the day.  I just tack on another hour to an already long day and count my blessings that my kids and I can still talk.  Of course, if I have a deadline, I really do put a Do Not Disturb sticky note up, and they don't bother me.

Just as a side note and not to go into any details here, but my son was really into drugs and alcohol and wouldn't hold a job for about 6 or 7 years and honestly would hardly talk to me at all unless he had his hand out, wanting money.  Well, I guess I really should say that when we did talk and he wasn't asking for money, he was always lying to me to cover up what he was doing.  It was a hard road but we got through it, and I do love for him to talk to me now because I really feel like I have my son back.  So I guess I look at those interruptions a little differently.   :)

Your son sounds like a very smart young man. Not many kids these days truly care about their education. They look at high school as a party/social time, and dont look into the future what so ever, and said thing is a lot of our children are not getting the guidance from home either.

My son loves to learn and loves to be challenged and with him being home schooled we are able to do so.

And one other positive note on home schooling college intrance exams have shown that home schooled kids are just as smart if not smarter than those who go to public or private schools. The one on one they get is a big big factor in that.

Best of Luck!!!!!!!

cannot legally ask you how old you are.   I quess they can get an idea of age based on work history though or if you put educational history on resume.  I'm nearly 50, but when I answer the phone I frequently have people ask to speak to my mother.  I've been offered a position with every company I've ever applied to. 

I have been working at home since my first child was a day old and all I can say is you get used to it and so do they since they don't know any different.  I think it would be harder having them a bit older and then starting to work at home.  I took short breaks for feeding but worked during the regular work day other than that, just had the baby lying on a blanket next to my chair or in a bouncer seat or sometimes on my lap, and as he got older he started playing next to my desk.  The second time around I had twins, and well, that was a bit harder, but I fed them both at the same time and put them on the same feeding and nap schedules to maximize both work time and my sanity. 

Ya do what ya gotta do.

Patti - give it up...not worth your time or your expertise, nor any of us well-seasoned (decades) professionals, and be sure to take some time for yourself. 

The kids were fooling around in the parking lot and chasing each other around.  One of the boys, who was approximately 10 years old, jumped up and ran across the hood of a parked car in his cowboy boots.  He totally scratched up and dinged the hood of the car.  The owner, a pastor at a local church, told the parents about it.  The father denied it, then he tried to hit the pastor.  The police were called.  I took the car license number and testified as a witness.  These people are just a prime example of the poor excuses for parents that our country is full of.  The parents should have been publicly caned.

My parents would have beat my butt with a leather belt if I had dared touch someone else's property.  They never had to, though, because they told us how to behave and enforced it.  I'm not saying I never got spanked with a hand when I was young, but I knew it was a potential consequence.  My own kids know if they dare to damage someone else's property, they will pay for the repairs and be punished.  They are too old to spank, however, especially since they're bigger than me!  LOL  My kids also know what it's like to have their property stolen or damaged by other people.