After divorce, child chronic illness, involuntary job change, parents illnesses and death, was force
Posted By: anon on 2006-03-05
In Reply to: Bankruptcy or not?? - Indebt
I frequently regret it, the changes it has made to my life, but when life hands you horror, at least there is this "final solution" to your financial situation. I must admit, I sleep better, and I can finally hold my head up, and I no longer feel hopeless. Find the attorney you can work with,get your free consultation and DO WHAT HE TELLS YOU TO DO. If you have doubts, see a 2nd and a 3rd attorney, till you're comfortable with the person you choose.
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- Bankruptcy or not?? - Indebt
- After divorce, child chronic illness, involuntary job change, parents illnesses and death, was force - anon
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chronic illness
God bless you. I have systemic lupus erythematosus (SLE) and I still work full time, I have a friend diagnosed with multiple sclerosis and she still works full time..Hang in there, honey..You can live with a chronic illness..I have lived with my SLE for 36 years and my friend with multiple sclerosis for 10 years..
never ever force anyone to attending funeral rituals, but especially a child who does not want to go
nm
do you know how many kids come in the ER on an overdose and the parents say "Not my child?" nm
x
U.S. Parents Outsourcing Child Care Overseas
http://pop.youtube.com/watch?v=vxj1RDbp_iE&feature=user
Sorry, but with all the serious stuff this morning ,had to send this !!!!
Head's up! AAMT Task Force has posted about their name change
I know some posters here are members who may be interested for various reasons. :-)
What? Do you really think those parents or their friends thought the child would be awake and roami
x
She brought a child in this world with 2 parents, not just a one night stand or something..
She left him because he became abusive and used to try to attack her with knives. It was in her and her daughter's best interest to raise her on her own. One of the reasons she did not seek child support because she was afraid of him. Living from experience, you can get restraining orders all you want. If someone wants to hurt you bad enough, they can usually succeed at doing it. She only went after him for child support after she lost her job. He would give her money here and there before, but she never knew how much or when. She didn't care though because she was able to take care of her daughter very comfortably on her own. She had the same job since high school, was a very valuable employee, worked in the fitness club business as a manager of a gym. She cannot find anyone will to pay her that. She was making that much money because she had been there since high school and she always met sales goals and got bonuses. She is not depending on the government to provide anything. Never has. All she wanted was insurance for her child until she gets on her feet. Do you know there are quite a few countries that have government insurance for everyone?
My sister-in-law left her boyfriend she was with after having her child because he was having a long term affair with another person. She has battled constantly for child support. He owns his own business and does not report all his earnings for tax reasons. She has only been able to collect off what he claims. He is 6+ months behind. She has filed grievances, everything. Meanwhile, he drives a brand new extended cab, he bought a house and he has a jet ski. What the hell good is it to go after the dad if the government is not going to consistently enforce its own court orders?
childs illnesses
I have two children who were born ill - I know how important it is to let the schools know this information - BUT they do not use it as they should - this is more or less to cover their butt - if something happens that they can link it to an illness they are "not at fault". I told the school my son was hypoglycemic and epileptic - yet they punished him for sleeping in class by not allowing a regular lunch just jelly sandwiches - needless to say he was not sleeping he had a seizure and then to top it off th jelly dropped his sugar to 23. best part was when they asked for an excuse for his absence when he was taken from the school in ambulance.
Involuntary commitment
Do you think involuntary manslaughter,
perhaps from missing a stop sign, should be a reason for withholding a job other than driving? If so, then Missy bush should not be sitting next to the king's throne if she had been appropriately charged for killing her boyfriend when she was in high school.
involuntary cursor movement
Mine does that on occasion. It must be an optical mouse. You can clean the bottom of the mouse and brush off your mouse pad....that helps for me.
Go to NBC10.com - Our local news has "Wednesday's Child" which is a child for adoption.
Every Wednesday they introduce a child who needs a home and a family. There should be some information there as these kids are up for adoption.
www.NBC10.com -
Hope that helps!
WRONG! A child that has a fear of discipline = a well behaved child.
I have a beautiful, intelligent 11 year old daughter that hasn't had a spanking in 6 or 7 years and probably only 3 her entire life. She is very well behaved and I get compliments on her behavior constantly. When she does get out of line all I have to say is, "Shall I call your father?" Call it what you want, it works. She respects and obeys me and her father. Why??? For fear of the facing the consequences of misbehaving. Having a total lack of fear or respect for authority is exactly what's wrong with Generation X/kids today. I turned out just fine as did my siblings. Why?? Because my parents took "time out" to bust our a$$es whenever we got out of line.
Is that clear enough for you???
Not all of us are parents. Not everyone had caring parents. nm,
nm
Very sad - but obviously an illness.
Nobody would be drinking at that hour of the day for *fun*. I hope instead of throwing the fines at her they make her go for professional help.
Don't know what your illness is, but
wish you could see some of the doctors I work for. My brother and his wife are both doctors and they are both increcible caring. My uncle goes to Africa every year (on his on dime) to do cleft lip and palate surgeries. Maybe you just need to vent but I don't think it is fair to generalize all.
Chronic Yawner!
Anyone ever have to put up with a chronic yawner who dictates during/through a yawn? How could anyone be THAT tired? Life must be tough when you make more than +$250,000 a year--poor thing--wish I could get that exhausted! 
Even 4.5 is too low. doctors do not change - they still hem and haw, change, change stuff along wit
It is just not enough for the work. Speech is great on the wrists but you are not just reading what is typed, you are making a lot of changes. I have a hard time doubling a lot of days with all the changes I have to make. Just my opinion.
Illness/pregnancy
These are supposed to be treated the same - 12 weeks leave - my mother-in-law got sick last year and when she could not go back to work by the date that the hospital specified (she's a nurse) they terminated her from her job - and she had worked at this place for 20 years. I would seek legal advice on this subject before telling anyone at work.
kids and illness
I have ttwokids - 22 and 15, my oldest was born with epilepsy and took them 2 years to find out I was not crazy that something was wrong - he would just fall into a come sleep - no convulsion. Now my 15 year old has an episode - his first and when I rush him to the hospital it takes them 3 hours to be convined he was not on drugs - I know they are doing their job, but not all kids are druggies. i tried to give them a family history and they did not listen until 3 hours later when they got the blood tests back - then they did what they should haev done all along and found out his blood pressure was extremly low, and he probably has a mild hert condition to go alond with his respiratory problems he has had from birth. (heart problems run on both sides, and I have a strong family history of epilepsy too.) Why do all doctors feel that when a kid comes in he must have done something - thank goodness the wait did not cause my son more problems.
Depression is an illness. (sm)
Believe it or not, I understand your feelings about just doing your job day after day and not being appreciated. I think most of us can relate to it; I know when I clean the house or do the laundry, nobody seems to notice, but let me get behind, and boy, howdy all of a sudden I get some attention.
But depression is an ILLNESS, not just a lack of get up and go!!! And a person who suffers from it is hard enough on themselves emotionally without having to hear from people who don't understand it how lazy they are and how undeserving of any support they are.
You need to work on some compassion, and if you can't say anything nice, why say anything at all? If you're feeling underappreciated, for heaven's sake DO something about it. Post on the board that you need some sympathy and you'll get it. We're all in the same boat, really!
Chronic chapped lips
This seems so goofy --- go to the dermatologist for chapped lips? I have had this problem consistently for the past couple of months. I haven't been sunburned. My lips are swollen (love the swelling - looks like collagen! LOL!) and chapped, can't get enough chapstick (no MQ jokes - LOL). I read this could be a malignant of premalignant condition and I should see a dermatologist! Wow! Anyone have any insight into this problem? Thanks in advance! 
I have a chronic pain condition as well
It is giving me a break right now so I won't talk too much about it so I don't wake it up.:) This is my first relief in 10 years from severe RA which seems to have been in every joint at one time or another. So, totally understand your emotions on needing to feel like a useful member of society and take care of your responsibilities. Before RA, I worked for 17 years. I did try the disability route and was denied 5 years ago 5 times! Never tried again. I didn't want to then but to help the husband with the bills, I thought it was best and it would have been good for the marriage as well.
The hips keep me from sitting long periods, but you have MT companies who will work with you. One I work for now wants at least 800/lines per day but prefers 1000+. However, mentioned it was okay to break frequently as long as when the MT is on that the MT is very productive. So you might have a longer work day than the other MTs. However, there is hope. I would say even with your nursing background and good grasp of medical terminology and anatomy/physiology, you should still find a program in transcription or a good mentor or both. My heart goes out to you. I thought of nursing and my condition is the only reason I didn't go for it, but it is in demand, that and technology jobs are in demand also. I try to stick with the jobs that are in high demand.
I am going to try to leave a web site for you to take a look around that will give you an idea of what companies expect an MT to know:
http://www.hpisum.com/home.ihtml
You will have to cut and paste the address in the address box, but there is a lot of information there. Other posters may have more information for you. Best wishes.
Can you get cancer from chronic mouth
I have a wisdom tooth that is coming in. I do NOT do well w/ dentists/anesthesia, etc...well a few months back i had an appointment to have this removed. long story short even though the dentist knew I was freaked out about the local anesthesia he took so long to do the extraction my mouth was no longer numb when the hygenist tested my gum area. I freaked out, left crying and vowed to never go back to him. Well now that the tooth is slowly coming in more and more i have an ulcer that seems to be getting bigger from where i am more or less chewing the inside of my mouth.
It doesn't really hurt or bother me that much, i would much rather deal with the ulcer than have another panic attack/heart racing event from the local at the dentist's office. My concern is this: Can you develop cancer from a chronic mouth ulcer? My aunt died of oral (tongue) cancer last year so i'm paranoid about it. 
Any info you can give is welcom. Thanks!
An illness? More like a character flaw.
We all have choices to make, and the choices we make define our character. She chooses to drink herself into a stupor and drive a car. She could just as easily choose not to do so. It's all the apologists for drunks, the "it's-an-illness-we-must-not-judge-them" brigade that keep sending the dangerous drunks back out on the road. If someone chooses to drink and drive then kills someone, they have chosen to commit murder and should face the same consequences as any murderer.
Sounds like you are the one with mental illness
NM
I have one PA with a chronic allergy or sinus problem....
which is, of course, not his fault, but makes him very hard to understand. He has a very deep voice and likes to raise and lower the volume at random. And at least every other sentence, he says "Excuse me," like he made a mistake, but then just repeats what he said and keeps on going. He also likes to say, "Delete." a lot. I think he is even the one who dropped a "F" bomb on me one day.
Same thing here. I have chronic tinnitus and hear crickets
when it gets really really acute with sinusitis to go with it. People think I am crazy when I tell them I hear crickets but that's what it sounds like.
It already has. I have to work from home because of disability due to chronic disease.
My physicians and visiting nurses are extraordinarily caring individuals who fortunate have (more so than I had previously thought, apparently).
Also, I can understand venting about a situation you feel you have no control over. I assume you desired sympathy or empathy or just someone to say, "I know where you are coming from," but to post incoherently and then lash out at those that reply is only going to add to your frustrations and negative feelings.
I am sorry you feel as though your health care providers don't care if you did, but I am sure that is not the reality of the situation. If you had taken the time to provide context to your rant, then you might have received the type of replies you were looking for, whatever that may have been.
Best of luck to you.
Me too. Been there, done that, got the divorce.
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For those of you who have gone through a divorce...sm
My husband and I have decided to go our separate ways after only 2-1/2 years of marriage. I have no idea where to start and what to do because we bought a house together, bought a new car together, have credit cards together, etc. This is a mutual decision for both of us to end our marriage so it's not like it is a bitter divorce or anything. We would like to NOT involve attorneys but how do we separate all of our stuff?
Thanks
No, you didn't betray him! That's his illness speaking. Second, does he or did he ever drink?
Some folks with drinking problems obviously are also alcoholics, but they don't have to fit the classic "drunk" stereotype. My husband "cycles" as well, probably from bipolar, which is manic depressive - the happy ups and the mean ugly lows. Men tend to self-medicate with alcohol. Also, when an alcoholic is in an abstinent period, which can even often be self decided, no pressure. The drinker just lays off for a while - that mean cycle is a "dry" alcoholic. The original problems remain - the alcohol isn't there to give them their conceived happy "buzz", so they are mean and nasty as they could be as drunks, yet sober. The only way to defeat depression in anyone is by confronting it head-on and NOT letting up. Otherwise, you're then "enabling" their sickness to continue, etc. Sounds more complicated than it is, but its not! You're doing everything right - get help from everywhere, tell everyone you have to, shine light on his behavior, and HOPEFULLY he will be convicted to get help. Otherwise, I agree with the others - pack your bags and move on. It will NEVER get better. It will get worse over time, but you'll get more numb to it... No way to live! I confronted it with my DH - fought viciously for his life, really, and he's a changed healthy man about 10 years down the road. People CAN change, and seek help, and get well, but they have to be confronted with it. Denial is our worst enemy. Good luck to you. I hope this helps.
If he is on disability for a mental illness, why do you even listen to him? He is nuts. Maybe if h
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Bells palsy and chronic headaches? Does anyone have any good info or help out there? sm
Unfortunately, I have had Bells palsy for the past 8 years. I got it while pregnant and had a pretty severe case. I was extremely sick with that pregnancy and then ended up with the Bells palsy. In fact, my baby quit growing after I got the Bells palsy! Thank God I was about 32 weeks when I got it. Anyway, over time the symptoms have not been as bad. For the most part to look at me you couldnt tell I had the Bells--until I smiled at you. Then, of course, you would know it. I have regained some use of muscles, but not all. I have been able to get my eye to close, but it is not tight, so I still battle with dry eye every night/morning. My forehead has been completely "dead" since this happened. Even electric stim could not move the muscle! Whenever I get a headache it always seems to settle on the dead part of my forehead. My headaches have been increasing lately, and currently I have had a headache for five days! I have tried Advil, Tylenol and Excedrin Migraine with no relief. My neurologist cant see me until January since I havent been to him for years. I can not afford an MRI right now and have no desire to start taking any type of pain med. Does anyone have any experience with Bells or have any ideas. I was wondering if a TENS unit might help. I have been reading about that on the internet. Sorry this is so long. Thank you for any help. As you can imagine, I am having a very hard time working all day at my computer with this!
I heard crickets til I realized it was winter. Was really the start of chronic
:=
agree - many MT's have chronic back/neck/shoulder problems also
x
You have a point there. I wonder if it's the divorce?
It's like Tom Cruise not aging well also. And have you seen Robert Redford? OMG. His face is ravaged with time and his neck..... terrible. But you get Paul Newman he he does look better as he ages. Guess it's in the genes?
Not due to divorce, but our family went their
separate ways after both of our parents died. Strange, because I always thought we were close before that, but it could have been wishful thinking.
He was my divorce attorney
.
My attorny put in my divorce that I have to take him
to court to enforce any part of the divorce agreement, he has to pay fees for both of us. To the best of my understanding, it's very difficult to have something changed once it's been a legal and binding contract in a divorce. The judges normally stick to what the original agreement was. Good luck.
Well, if it's due to divorce, you DEFINITELY want an actual
real estate agent. You are thinking of the money you think you could save, but what it will end up turning into is a bigger mess. If you sign a 60 or 90 day contract with a for sale by owner agent (i.e. Help-U-Sell, Assist2Sell, BuyOwner) and all they do is plunk a sign in your yard and give you a lock box then you're not getting much. They don't do a lot of advertising other than on their own website and they might print a few flyers for you.
With the market soft right now, unless you price the house really low just to get rid of it, expect it to sit for 90 to 120 days.
when I got a divorce -- see message
Whe I got a divorce my husband tried to make me put a price on my small business and there basically was no value as most of my clients would probably not go with a new owner. Most of the value was in my computer, printer, etc. which after a year is worth nil. It is mainly an income and not much else as you cannot quarantee that when you sell that your clients will go with the new business. Sometimes it can be valued at a one month income. There are real estate agents that sell businesses and she can check with them to see what they say. I worked for a small MTSO that sold and what they did was to not tell any of the clients that it was being sold, ran under the same name with some of the same people there and it went okay but that is touchy. You are selling more the name of the business than anything else. Again, she needs to contact a real estate agent that specializes in selling businesses. She is selling her client list and name mainly and hoping that they all go with the new owners which is a gamble and not one I would take. Good luck.
OK. Now if your husband is bringing you down by his mental illness and not paying rent
(is husband able to work? how deep is this mental illness? did he have money to pay rent and spent it elsewhere?) then maybe you should think about leaving him rather than placing your kids in any kind of foster care. That has to be traumatic but then so does living on the street. Speaking of placing your children in foster care while you get yourself OK in the head, what is your problem at this point. You see, if there is a lot of arguing and a dysfunctional family living on the streets, then foster care to permanent placement may be better for them. I just don't quite understand how you got into this mess and if these are mental health issues on both your part and your husband's I would look into placing the children. BTW, how old are they?
So all things considered if you don't have any issues other than depression because of a lack of a place to live and your husband's mental health, I would go to a family member or church and BEG for help sorting your life out. If there is more than that going on, including maybe substance abuse along with permanent mental health issues that will keep you from caring for your children, yes I would seek placement for them. And I would seek PERMANENT placement rather than foster care which I would think would be more traumatic for your children.
Both. Choice A "can" put you there, but so can a major illness, accident, fire, etc.
with this economy it is harder and harder to work your way out of poverty no matter what the reason for being there is.
Don't change. I had to change back to cable. SuddenLink DSL stinks! nm
nm
She hasn't filed for a divorce yet -
Because the state she lives in does not recognize legal separation, she had an agreement drawn up by her corporate atty. This agreement handed the house (quick claim deed) and business over to her, while her "future ex" draws his pension and moved to warmer weather (California). This all happened when things were friendly. Now she wants a divorce so she can get on with her life (with her new beau she is buying the house with). BAD idea since she has not filed for a divorce. Anyway, thanks everyone. I think I'll be visiting her in jail.
I guess I was wondering how a divorce could have been
the agreement or been before the judge with your lawyer to dispute something in the agreement. People with nothing to dispute rarely have to appear, as they have already signed the documents that the lawyer presents to the judge. I don't know if you signed your portion of the agreement without having read it to ensure your wishes were followed...hope you find some resolution.
And they say divorce is less traumatic on adult children....
Unfortunately, this is NOT the case. Adult children whose parents divorce quite often end up just as you have described. They are old enough to form their own opinions which are quite often colored by their life experiences and how they relate to each parent as an adult with adult biases and opinions. Divorce, regardless of the age of the children, always affects the children and people who are "waiting until the kids are grown" are only deluding themselves.
Each state has different divorce and family laws; however, sm
ex-hubby is not entitled to anything after the date the divorce was filed. So, if she filed for divorce on January 1 and hit the lottery on January 2, he gets nothing!
At least that is how it is in PA. Don't know about other states.
This is not illegal in most states. Sometimes it's in the divorce agreement.
nm
I needed to divorce cheating DH of 27 years. This was
xx
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