you are loving her
Posted By: JanSetzmt on 2007-09-15
In Reply to: Thanks to all who have replied thus far. - Stressed out Mom..
You are loving her by stepping back and making her stand on her own two feet. Loving someone does not mean enabling them to hurt themselves. Loving your child means pushing them out of the nest and letting them learn on their own. If you keep enabling her you will not be loving her as much as if you push her out. Praying for you....
Jan
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All the above are why my loving
furkids stay inside. I have a bird feeder right outside my work window and they are welcome to come and look at the birds which they do but I love my feathered friends as well. I have this unsociable furcat next door who had the nerve to come in my yard trying to catch birds. I chase it off, folks here not supposed to let their animals run around anyway.
loving pet
I am so sorry for the loss of your beloved pet. I'm glad you enjoyed his company and love for many years. This is the caveat of having our loving pets - it's so difficult to lose them. We will join with all of them one day, when it is our time...how could we not. They provide us with so much love and good company.
Pit bull or not he is a loving dog ...sm
who has never attacked and I honestly with all my heart know he would never hurt me. I believe in all honesty he would die to protect me to make sure I wasn't harmed if that is what it took. I know some pits have attacked owners and I believe these were either unstable dogs or abused or provoked. My dog has a respect for me also. He knows I am the boss and when I take a firm tone and let him know I am not happy with him he just bows his head and lays down. I didn't set out to own a pit bull he kind of fell into my lap you could say and I fell in love with him and he with me. I rocked him as a baby and nurtured him and he loves me with everything in him and I love him the same. My ownership of him just happened unexpectedly and I am so grateful it did. When I am sad he licks my tears and is so loving. I know other breeds are capable of this but CJ just happens to be a pitbull. I dont care. His breed is not important. It is the love in his heart. What is inside him. I don't judge a dog for what they are but who they are.
How to compete with a loving doting MIL.
I am jealous of MIL and Dh relationship. There, I admitted it. It was a huge red flag when we were dating but I ignored it. To start at the beginning I was jeolous. I wished now I would have listed but I didn’t I married him. Lived here in an appointment but he really considered his home with mommy who was 88 miles away. He would go every weekend leaving me here alone. I thought well, he is not married to me or anything I guess he is taking care of responsibility. He seemed obsessed on the family farm (70 acres) and getting that started. He and his mommy were working side by side to get “the place” fixed up. Occasionally, his friend and his wife would invite them camping so he and mommy would take a break with his buddies and camp. Not so intelligent me was sitting at home, alone thinking one of these days he will figure out what a wonderful person I am and he won’t have to cling to mommy so much. Boy was I ever wrong. He took my virginity and that made me want to cling to him tighter. I shamelessly chased him. Finally I told him that if he wasn’t going to marry me, I was leaving. He said okay, lets do it. Well we had a rush engagement. DH hated the idea of a wedding he had already been through that once. (This was his second marriage). He was not very cooperative and kind of rude but I did get my wedding. At some points in our courtship I thought it was sweet how he doted on his mommy I just wished I saw how dysfunctional it really was. I think my first clue should have been when he was late for our second date because mommy called him bawling because she and her brother got into a fight.
Anyway, it was so hard to keep MIL out of our business. MIL balanced our check books, dh would take me and MIL out of a drive, all outings included MIL. I told him that I think we should be taking care of our financial bus and dh said “no, mom knows how to do it and besides if I take that from her she won’t feel wanted. “ I asked, who did you marry, me or mommy. Well MIL is not in our finances anymore. She did used to go through our mail. I asked her if she was going to be a meddling MIL and she got mad and told DH and dh jumped my butt saying she is only trying to help and a few cuss words. (when the cussing started, I turned out). MIL was upset and she was going to take us to court. I guess she thinks she has rights to his money just like a wife would or more so. They did have bank accounts together, cc together.
Any, I cannot write a book. Just a long story short, I try to put up boundaries and I am the villain. MIL is not a meddler, she is trying to help, she is only being a loving, doting, graaaadmommeeee. To get along, I try to think of her as a break from the kids but the way she interacts with my children sends chills down my spine. First she would say that is her baby, she didn’t want her baby doing this or that. She did not want her baby to get sick so I couldn’t take her outside. She wants to sleep in their room so she can take care of them, she would take my oldest dd in another room and shut the door and undress. She wanted to take her to the public restroom, (It is like she thinks, DH child is her responsibility, I am just womb donor. It was driving me stir crazy. She and dh would buddy up on our outings and leave me feeling like a third wheel. And with DD, it was like she, DH and my child were just one big happy family. Gag. One time dh ask her if she wanted another baby, she said “I love babies.” GAG. Bad part is my oldest dd loves her. She wanted MIL to take her to school this morning, not me. She is 5 years old.
If I put up boundaries, or say that anything bothers me, I am the villain being mean to an old lady. MIL acts like such an abused old lady who looves me so much and I amso mean and trying to take her babies away (DH and the kids). Everybody says, she is so NICEEEE. I feel like I am in way over my head. We have been through counseling and the counselor said that he needed to put his wife first before mommy. DH thought that counselor was nuts and that he just wanted him to can his poor little old mommy. I have asked dh if he wanted a divorce so he can have more time to dote on mommy and so she can feel wanted and needed. He said no, I would rather have you here than her but he doesn’t understand why I am so mean. I have developed anger that I never knew I had in me. MIL I guess developed a sudden interest in psychiatry she says I come from an unloving, uncaring family. DH grew up happy. I guess that is why he was a teenage alcoholic, had 3 DUIs, got married the second he turned 18, had legal problems of course his mommy, being the loving mommy she is, would lighten the load for him and help him do community service. I cannot win. I want out of this insanity. I just don’t think I have anyone around to help me.
You are talking about loving the kids, right?
As an MT I on my own supported a house of 5 people, paying all the bills, including mortgage, cars, utilities- this was when hubby disabled on dialysis. Why would you want to stay with some jerk like that? I would not care if I had 10 kids. The other hubby died and I have a husband who never, ever puts me down. I live on Easy Street. Work part-time now, vacation twice a year, have most everything I want or desire. You can do better than crap.
I am loving these doggie-auggie
pictures- they are just too cute. I also do not know how to post pictures or I would show you my 2 fine male cats. They are real charmers their own self. Loving these, keep it up!
I am really amazed at how and question to loving ASR
speech (or the platform I work on) seems to sorta "take over" your PC. In other words, not only does it pick up what the physician says but I find that when I type a word wrong a lot of times it spells it correctly and these are words I do not have in autocorrect- have you also noticed this?
Oh, besides loving water, they also eat olives!
NM
I'm loving life since leaving MT.
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I would also wear them, especially if you had a loving relation with her..nm
nm
Living in Georgia and loving it
Never have felt the need to move because I got frustrated, never. Moved from another state over 30 years ago and love where I live. I really hate when I see an overall blanket statement about a state being backwards. I find myself going on the offense when a person attacks a state in general when they perhaps are unhappy just for the person they are. I am sure a person can find fault with any place they might be brought up or choose to live but my community is very progressive, upscale and as much as I love to travel, hope this can be my home from here on. People make their own happiness and if you are unhappy either in your personal or business life, then perhaps you are just soured on the world, not where you live. If a person wants to move from my state, hey, just more room for the people who can enjoy their life here.
Loving these positive responses. Feeling much better about it now!
nm
I'll still be loving you - Restless heart
That was played at my wedding!
Please don't feel guilty! You sound like a loving fur mom!..I too
lost a cat this week, also about 18 years old. She was an outside cat who never came in but about 6 weeks ago she just walked in one day and never wanted to go back out, so I figured the end was near. I feel very guilty too, but I made her comfortable, stroked her, made sure she was comfortable. Hubby went out in the pouring rain/sleet to bury her under a cedar tree where our others are buried. When I told him how bad I felt about not being here when she died, he said she had a great life because of me and how much I cared for her. I am sure you were wonderful to her. Please don't feel so guilty! My gal, the day before she died, actually did go outside, it happended to be sunny for a bit, she laid down on the deck and enjoyed the warmth and caught the last bird of her life! For a cat, she went out on a good note!
You are a caring, loving person. That has been obvious SM
from your posts for a long time to me. You are doing the right thing and staying on top of this. With your close eye and caring and with professionals on board I think your son has a bright future. Keep us informed. 
Be patient, kind, loving and understanding . . .
sounds to me like he is missing you and your mom/family life. He is probably hurting right now and needs you and for some reason he finds great comfort in being with you. My dad died 13 years ago and I loved having him around. I know your situation is different, but be the comfort he needs right now and I am sure this will end in time. He is looking for reassurance for something. Who divorced who? He is probably hurting a great deal right now even though he does have a new girlfriend. You won't regret being there for your father. Trust me.
THANKS -- great article -- loving your responses ! n/m
n
It's my birthday today, and I'm loving every single moment of it!
Sounds like Cedric is in a loving foster home!
Where do you live - that path looks gorgeous!
Just be supportive and a loving friend/family member - sm
My son jokingly tells me that I have Super Gay-Dar because I have had a few friends out to me first.
When my friend Chris came out to me a few years after high school, he was a complete wreck.
He called me up one night after I had not heard from him for awhile and the conversation went something like this.
Him: I really have to tell you something (I could tell he was shaking terribly and just sounded so upset and scared.)
Me: Okay.
Him: I'm gay. There I said it.
Me: And?
Him: What do you mean AND?
Me: Are you serious? You think I DIDN'T know? How many times were we BOTH checking out guys "back pockets" in the mall? How many times did YOU help me pick out dresses for formal dances? How many times did my parents let you come over for slumber parties all the way through high school? Do you think they let ANY of my other guy friends do that? Did you notice there were no other GUYS at those sleepovers?
Him: He has such a funny loud, barking laugh and he just started laughing and then crying.
Me: You wouldn't be you if you tried to be a straight guy. You're more fun this way.
Him: I just love ya girlie, You're my bestest bestest girlfriend.
Me: You're my bestest bestest girlfriend too.
And that was that. We still laugh about it. He can always make me laugh.
Torn Between Two Lovers, Feeling Like A Fool, Loving Both
nm
Rose, the good-hearted, animal-loving ditz!! But with
s
Morally-wrong things hurt other people. Loving
.
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