yes. find a doc that will *listen* to you--sm
Posted By: nn on 2007-02-16
In Reply to: Oh my aching body...need suggestions..sm - LuvMaroc
(good luck in that regard), but sounds like it could be a thyroid condition or maybe fibromyalgia, or like *hayseed* said, some type of autoimmune thing. good luck to you!
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Find a lawyer, find out where you would stand - sm
in the event of a divorce/separation, regarding custody, house, etc. Custody was my main concern as well since I lied on numerous occasions about the finances. Where I am I was told that would not factor in to the custody at all. I can prove that I am my kids caregiver 90% of the time, I ferry they around everywhere, help with homework, get ready for school, meet at busstop, etc. I could also point out my husband is an alcoholic, self treats his depression with alcohol instead of getting proper medical treatment, has threatend to kill himself (or me) numerous times (though he always says he was joking and did not mean it.....that is his standard answer to everything, or that he never said that). Now I do love him enough to deal with all that because deep down inside my DH is full of it, luckily for me, he has never followed through on anything he says he is going to do. But I thought my confession would be the straw that broke it all and send him over the edge. He still is angry with me, I am sure he will be for a long time, but is keeping it together pretty well, though he has said the stress was going to kill him, now he know how I felt I guess. I am sorry your husband is such a smuck. I feel like a dog sometimes with the sex demands, have to do it the night before he goes out of town....he will be traveling a lot for work for the next 3-4 months, which I am more than glad about, much calmer here then, though it gets tiring for me but as he is not really helping much right now it really won't be much of a change. As for yours going on 5 day weekends.....have you considered having him followed, sounds like there may be some infidelity afoot, and if so that would strengthen your case in the event of a divorce and custody I would think. Sounds a bit fishy going out until 1 a.m. and his frequent trips. My DH fishes too, but he goes 2 miles from here with one of our male neighbors, they shoot the breeze and he gets to unwind some which I encourage. Very rare weekends with a buddy of his, I am talking once every 2 years, which again is fine with me. Start keeping track of all you do, when he is home, where he supposedly goes, with whom, etc. He cannot show he will be a responsible dad if he is never there or never interacts with his own kids. My DH would probably suggest I take our older daughter and he the younger, spliting them up, he has the same perception, the oldest is mine, the youngest is his. Our younger daughter is much easier to deal with, our older daughter drives him nuts and she is only 10. My younger one (8) knows something has been going one though, and worries we will divorce, which she does not want. She is very perceptive for her years. I hope that if you do go the divorce route, which would actually probably be best in your situation, that it all works out for you and you get your fair share of assets, etc. Make sure before you do anything like that you have all your ducks in a row, so talk to divorce lawyer. I talked to one for 45 minutes, cost me $160 but was worth it to set my mind at ease. Good luck.
But, now listen to this
the mother has been held in contempt of court 12 times so she is not an angel either. Things are not hunky-dory on her part either.
Listen to your PCP sm
See my message above re yoga breathing. I have a friend who has adult-onset ADD. Yes, it can happen - or maybe she had just found ways to compensate all these years until she was diagnosed.
You might want to check into it further....
Thank you...do you really think they will listen to me (sm)
in this situation? I assumed they were only there for people who are being physically abused. Which he did a few years ago, but has not done since. I should have left then...but of course I didn't.
I'm sure they would listen you...
dont know where you live but they also have laws regarding what you can keep on your property, i.e., live pigeons,etc. There is also a law on how many ducks you can have in possesion at one time, meaning the dead ducks in his freezer. You can get into some hefty fines for that though so think hard about it before you start down that road.
I did listen when I was a kid either.
My parents were just a bunch of dumb hard azes that all they wanted to do was prevent me from having any fun. Well, the older I got, the smarter they got.
I am now going through it with my kids and I sometimes wonder how they ever kept sane. LOL. I have a smart-alecky mom that likes to say "payback time."
Please listen up........JMO
I had a male family member that went to stay with cousin every summer. His parents would see attitude changes, a little anxiety maybe afterwards, but he was a high strung kid. Years later, around 21 years, he told his parents the cousin molested him. They even had this kid come to their home for summer. Their child never said anything because he felt because he was a family member, the family would be upset with him or cause family problems, even though his parents had always talked to their children about anyone, including family members, that may touch or act inappropriately toward them to come and tell them immediately. It was devistating to the parents. I feel so sorry for them. They can't stand to be around their own nephew but their child does not want anyone else to know. But because of his age, they don't know what else to do but not say anything because he has asked them not to.
I don't mean to sound negative, but I would have second thoughts now letting a male child go stay with another male child, especially one a little older. That really opened my eyes to just how things happen under the wire and you don't know, no matter how in tune you think you are with your child. Sorry to turn this into a worst case scenario but just be aware.
Listen, you.
I work for a large, world-class teaching hospital and I do pediatric endocrinology.
It's a very small percentage, but it's not nonexistent. Thinking that it only happens to someone else is one of the more stupid things I've heard in a long time.
Let him sit down and listen to what you do and say try to transcribe it... (sm)
May be he will understand that these are legal documents and it is your responsibility to make it that way!! Sometimes they have to walk in your shoes or sit in your chair, so to speak, to understand. Hope this helps!!
I don't listen to music, but I have the TV SM
on in the room next to me. Can't miss my Golden Girls. It just relaxes me and I feel like someone is here and the mood is lightened if I am stressed. 
Tell me how to listen to the news when
I get sooooo out of sorts listen to the idiotic, stup*d things people are doing each and every day. The stories I am hearing today- a mother gets on her daughters bus to have the child to fight for herself- with the mother holding the backpack for her child so "it would not get in her way." I think the mother charged with contributing to the deliquency in that case. The mother is telling the courts she is gonna teach her child how to defend herself?? What a crap! Another case today is mother who threw her 6 month old child at a police officer when the mother being investigated for having drugs in her trailer, another mother doused her 3 children with solvent, fires them up and the youngest child has died. Friends let a blind guy drive and he has wreck and dies- what in the hel* is happening with this news business. I cannot hear the news without all this insanity..
My veterinarian did not listen
I went this morning to get 2 more prescriptions for my oldest catt as she needs something for appetite stimulation and she has a thyroid problem (just like her mama.) I was talking with the front office and talking about the fact that she was still having issues with throwing up. Lord knows I have tried anything I could think of, changing the food several different ways- I would hand feed if it would help- and I brought up the subject of anything else over-the-counter I could use besides the Imodium they told me I could try. The front desk then tells me the Imodium not for problems with throwing up but soft stools?? They then went back to read on her chart where veterinarian had made note of my saying soft stools. This NEVER happened. I have not had a problem with those. You know, from the vets to your regular physicians, these people are just NOT listening. I called yesterday in fact to reorder her medications so would not have to wait and you guessed it, not ready when I got there and still had to wait. Why, why - This is a big problem and not just with animal doctors, with regular physicians.
Don't listen to that one mean poster (sm)
That is so sweet - don't listen to these people. If he was 12 I might be concerned. I lay in the bed at night with my 10 year old and read to him every night. He thinks I'm his mom, that's all. Your son will get through this. It is just a phase I'm sure.
Enablers listen up.
I posted on this board about this before. Anyone who is an enabler should take heed. Just found out tonight my high school friend of 40+ years has lost her son at the age of 34. He basically gave up, drank himself into a stupor, would not accept any help about getting him in a hospital and now has died. He had cirrhosis, kidney failure, has been on a vent- I tried to talk and talked incessantly to her about her not throwing a rope to him all the time. She has lived her life for him as well as her other son (who is in his 30s also) and ran for them, paid their bills, let her own self go to finance their wants and such. I am positive when he finally just sat down and refused to get up and finally could not get up that she probably still went to his home and I am sure she still took him beer. No amount of talking would ever change her mind that she was doing the wrong thing for him. She does this with her other son as well. She has made both of these grown children invalids and yet she did not see and does not see still. I am sorry for her loss but when do enablers ever think or know that possibly it is them that cause a codependency relationship like this? Folks, if your children are still leaning on you to support them, please understand how much harm you actually do. I feel sorry for her loss.
I can't listen to it, for reasons I just can't go into. nm
!
my money's on your dog. Listen to
him. My old dog one time was growling so low I did not hear her,I felt it through the leash at a park. It was a really nice looking young man whom I would not have been suspicious of at all, but when I looked down at her, her fur was up and she was poised to attack, a typical german shepherd stance with one back leg crouched. She did not like him at all and was not even wasting her time barking. I had to hold up hand up to him and tell him to stop where he was. This was a first although I had seen her become very protective in the house, always slept between me and the door and she always tried to answer the door ahead of me. It turned out these were gypsy pavers staying in my sister's park and they were all nothing but trouble, even making the news in Chicago when one mistreated her child in the parking lot.
There are several sides here, listen!
You had pain - you had suffering - you don't want to be alone. Set some rules, don't have any alcohol in the house at all. If anyone wants to visit at the holidays, they'll have to drink tea or coffee. That's what I do and barely anyone comes. So case closed as far as that goes. No one is saying you're a bad person, what they're saying is don't write your Mom and your Grandmom out of your life because you are punishing yourself. You are in the medical profession or associated with it. You know this goes on all th time in most families that will admit it. The posters who tell you to get over it mean well, they want you to have a family. You set the ground rules. Your OP said you want to forgive but cannot forget. You have gotten off the track here, read your OP again to yourself. Give them another chance with your rules, that's all people are trying to get across to you, according to your OP. Get back on track with the forgive thing and you will be happier. Just set the rules. Believe me, we've been there and just haven't posted what we've been through. Your story sounds familiar. There were no rules to protect children like there are now. You mom must have gotten the same treatment and her mom or they never would have done the behavior. Hate the sin and not the sinner is all anyone said here. They're just trying to shake you into reality before you spend a lonely holiday. If they don't keep their side of the bargain, then you have to tell them, not us. It's up to you, you asked for opinions and you may not like what you got, but you asked and people answered. God bless you and your son. Try to have a happy family holiday if you can.
Oprah probably does not have to listen to all the
Indian speakers I have to day after day.
don't listen to this garbage
No, no, no. Do not listen to this. Someone is making a play for your guy. Don't doubt it.
you'd best listen to other poster.
At least check it out through another source. don't EVER trust an employer that much, unless you just want to open yourself up to being taken.
Exactly what my husband said. Could not listen to
nm
Your gut is telling you something - Listen!
x
Doctors do not always listen
I needed bilateral ear surgery (typmanoplasty and mastoidectomy) not too long ago. The physician left it up to me which ear to do first, depending on my pain and hearing. I chose the left due to the amount of pain and drainage.
I reported to the hospital (a very prestigious teaching hosptial - in US New and World Reports top 5) that morning and the OR consent form stated the wrong ear. It said the right, rather than the left. I explained to the resident it was wrong and he proceeded to ARGUE with me, that I should just sign the consent form. I finally asked to see my own surgeon prior to signing and he agreed with me and changed it and reversed the OR equipment etc.
In my case it would not have made much difference since I needed 2 surgeries any way.
But what about the older, scared, and confused patient with no family there?
Maybe the patient did state the prima donna physician did not listen.
listen to your conscience...there is your answer--sm
not to mention the 10 commandments...thou shall not kill.
Or have him listen and just try to repeat what was dictated.
w
Do you listen to music while you work?? (sm)
I do sometimes if I get sleepy or if my mind starts to wander. Not anything with words that I would pay attention to, mostly just music, fast paced helps me type faster - anyone else? Just curious
I really tried, and my daughter didn't listen, now HIV+
I hear what you are saying and if words alone would have done it, my daughter would never, ever wound up like now. I was NOT overbearing, too lenient in fact now that I think back. I have posted here before, in the 80s about every other report was HIV but then NO name for it, did not want where from, horrible dictations and I tried. People just do not understand that talking, religious upbringing, close-knit families, whatever still does not stop a child from indulging in sexual behavior if they want to. I probably would focus more now on the SAFER aspect of sex, nothing can be completely safe except no sex at all. I understand but hopefully you can be close enough to help her get birth control and also a frank talk about SAFER sex. Lordy, you got to get around the sexual issue before worrying about the smoking.
Is this an indicator I should divorce - listen to this (sm)
I posted yesterday about my husband planning things without me.... Then yesterday he sent an e-mail that his company is looking for someone to go to Africa to work for 5 to 6 months early 2008 and should he apply. I got all excited at the thought of him being gone for that long!! How awful is that?? I can remember when I would be sad that he had to be gone for three or four days! Now he tells me he was kidding and that he would never really go work in Africa like that. I was disappointed! I have been trying to decide if I would be regretful if I divorced him but I can't believe my reaction to the possibility of him being gone and my disappointment that he was staying!
Be Happy Listen to Jimmy
http://solosong.net/jimmy.html
Happy Valentine's Day - We are going to a luncheon at local county club compliments of physicians at Lakewood Regional Medical Center.
1-3 P.M. I am taking some business cards although I think this is for Sr. Citizen GTG. I'll drink to that as well, always open to new friends but there may be a doc or 2 and I know how to work a room real well so might as well have a few cards in my pocket. Never fails, elevators, coffee shops, alway running into a potential client either for me or for my many associates !
Don't listen to the neighborhood cats! (sm)
People like that will always have something to say no matter what you do. Some people just look better with longer hair. I love short hairdos but they don't look good on me. I am 40 & my hair is right at shoulder length - it has never looked good on me shorter and I have thought about the fact that as I get older I probably will still want to keep it longer. I will always wear my hair however I want - you should too. Perhaps at your neighbors' ages they should grow up and not worry about something as silly as someone else's hair length!
Have considered it before - would they listen to me, his wife? (sm)
Would I have to show proof?
my kids didn't listen either
until I gave them a set time such as you have to take you bath and have your teeth brushed by 8:00 and if it wasn't done they lost a privilage. After a couple of times they saw I was serious and the problem stopped.
Yes, I'm so glad I didn't listen to that vet....
I wouldn't have my dog any other way! HE doesn't think anything is wrong at all! He definitely won't be felt sorry for!
So your dog was born able to hear? Apparently mine was born deaf...he has what's called double-dapple in. It's what makes his eyes blue, so says a breeder friend of mine.
He is also VERY intuitive to small little details. All I have to do is START walking towards the closet where I keep his leash and he is spazzing around because he knows it's walk time.
Thanks for sharing!
Never have to spank mine and they listen very well nm
x
There is an up side - I don't have to listen to him snore!
Well, okay, I have to listen to him in the other room, but at least its not right in my ear!
you can listen to samples of the albums
Go to amazon.com type in Johnny Mathis and pick an album and they will let you listen to samples of every song. Good Luck!
Again, about the English part, listen closely
The mother of the groom is saying the grandmother is calling and giving threatening messages. I would not give a rats behind I would not want to even invite her if she cannot control her anger. It is THEIR wedding, not the grandmothers, not the mothers, but THEIRS. People send out messages by what they say- the mother says the grandmother is threatening. Why don’t you invite the grandmother somewhere??? Oh really sounds like someone I would like to come to my wedding, NOT!
Listen to above. Go to a local breeder. He is cute, but
xx
I have that song on my iPod and listen to it when I'm working out
NM
Nickel Creek. Listen on You Tube and see if you
x
I don't think they charge to listen to introductory message.nm
nm
"go brush your teeth" -- kid don't listen
You know, truthfully, I have a nearly perfect 7-year-old kid. He's well-behaved, patient, kind and honest. Why is it, then, that we have to have this big fight EVERY night and EVERY morning regarding "go brush your teeth." I have to tell him this six to seven times before I am heard. Then I'm grumpy about it, nagging how they'll rot, turn black and fall out. My only thought is to try ignoring him when he requests something, making him ask me six to seven times. That might work. Gotta love him, but this really irks me.... Anyone else with a similar dilemma?
Listen if small children tell you someone is inappropriate
The majority of the time- the majority- little children are not going to say someone touched them inappropriately or such thing sexual unless it is happening or has happened- they just do not. Listen and learn from the children.
That's a creative idea. I'd love to have a listen, but I'd never have the nerve to ask! n
OP
I agree. Hand him the headphones to have a listen. And stress how
s
boxing announcer Michael Buffer!!! I could listen to him ALL DAY!!! (nm)
x
Be selective about news. Read newspaper, listen to CNN. No
xx
Of course they will listen. Mental abuse is extremely prevalent
and the abuse counselor will tell you the cycle of violence, here's an example you may recognize from him: First there is grumbling or little comments that demean you. You question yourself because he just seems to be "trying to help you," then, there is using finances, threats to take things away including children, controlling who you see, where you go, even what you think, then when you voice an opinion the violence. Starts out verbal. Will definitely lead to physical some day. He will also try the "crazy making," If you know the moon is blue for example, he will say it is green cheese, and then make you feel like you are the crazy one. You will question your reality and the truth that the moon is blue. You will become confused.
Then, a gift will appear, some form of kindness from him. You will forgive him figuring you were wrong, maybe it was you, maybe he will change, or whatever. You give in to him. Then it starts all over again, the grumbling. It is like clockwork. This is a proven fact with abusers. These people never change. A minute percentage do seek counseling, but the control they desire is too rooted in their being and their identity. They feed off of this control. Once the person they control is gone for good, they will seek someone else out.
Mental violence is a crime. Stalking is not just physical for example, phone calls, constant badgering when you say no, or say stop treating me this way, this is violence. I could go on about it, but please call the hotline and forgive me for being wordy here. Make that call and all will fall into place.
Yes, I watched that. She has a beautiful voice. A real joy to listen to!! nm
nm
Ask to listen to a dictation. Any doctor who can't put two words together to make a sentence, I d
:P
podcasts are like radio shows that you can carry with you and listen to at any time.
You can find them easily on iTunes. There's a link to their podcasts somewhere on the left side of the page. You can search podcasts for subjects that interest you. There are also video podcasts, if you have a video iPod. One of my favorites is The Rest of Everest. It's a weekly video show about climbing Mt. Everest.
You can also listen to podcasts right on your computer, so you don't need to download to your iPod, but it's nice to do that. There are podcasts about every topic you can imagine! Search "crafts", and you'll find something. There are lots of travel podcasts, sports, business, you name it. Some are very highly produced, others are kind of basic. Some are put out by professional broadcasting companies, too. PBS puts out tons, and I like to listen to Garrison Keillor's "News From Lake Wobegon" every week, too.
That's probably more than you needed to know!
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