these boys sound like good husbands. .
Posted By: jlynn on 2007-12-11
In Reply to: mine are like that too. - anon
Ladies. . sounds like you have raised some relly nice young men - - really good husband material . . . the girls are going to gobble them up. . . and be pretty happy . . I applaud you. . .any guy that respects and treats his mom well . . and enjoys being with her and doing things with her. . . has to be a pretty good guy. . .
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Sounds like one of those good ole boys
sitting around with a can of beer, got a cigarette behind his ear, wearing that wife beater T-shirt, either trying to go to the race track or watching his fav, Dale, Jr. You have it going on, don't you?
It does sound good, but (sm)
DH refuses to live in a community where they can tell him to mow his grass. Now mind you, our community is pretty secluded, and most of the people here do keep it up, but he is of the old school where if it is your house and the grass gets a little too high, it's your own business. We don't like it trashy either.
it does sound good I will have to try it nm
x
That does sound good. I might try it...
This started out to be clam chowder when I first made it, but then I had some sausage in the fridge that was about to go bad and thought that clams would not taste so good with the sausage, so every time I make it, it is a little different. I like to experiment, so thanks for the idea!
Biscuits sound good.
The breakfast cassarole has hashbrowns, bacon/sausage, eggs, and cheese. They really aren't pastry/muffin people. That's what I did last year with the fruit salad that didn't get eaten. I ended up in the kitchen making eggs instead. Talk about pain in the rear.
Biscuits would be easy and cheap. I have some strawberries in the freezer and could make a nice jam/preserve from that. Thanks!
You sound like you had a good marriage
That was a sweet statement to make about wishing you had that option. I am so in love with my husband and would hate to think about being without him. I enjoy his company every day. He travels but calls when he is gone. When he is home we share a computer room and he plays around on his computer while I work at mine. He is my best friend as well as my heart. I married him very late in my life after others but intend to keep this one.
Sound like you actually have a good partner. Above posts, not so much.
x
What is the best deal on cells and good sound also. nm
:
You sound really young, good taste never
goes out of style.
Does life in prison sound good to you? I would
xx
Ideas and recipes all sound good...
Now I have to make up my mind which to try tonight! That is a nice dilemma to have.
You make it sound like it's a good thing --
Are you just being sarcastic? I hope so. I love kids, but seriously, this country can't afford to have women having more children than they can afford. Look at the mess we're in now with welfare, not to mention the abuse and neglect these children suffer. I live in a very rural, low income area. I have seen so many children whose parents don't care for them, yet they continue to "pop out" more babies to get more welfare benefits.
If this becomes a new trend, the govt will end up removing the welfare caps in order to support these children. I know it's not the children's fault, but it isn't my fault either. I'm tired of paying for the welfare system as it is.
You're worried about the mother? Doesn't sound like she did a very good job herself! nm
x
Even higher bill w/3 cells & a land line, but sound quality & customer service are good.
s
Maybe they sent you and your husbands....
separate. Going by the last 2 digits in the SS #. Maybe one of you got it and then the other will get yours later.
Why do husbands
get special guy weekends but women can barely get to the grocery store alone.
Question about husbands
Do any of your husbands ever take vacation days from their jobs with plans of doing things around your house, i.e. clean up the yard, get rid of junk, etc.? My husband always says he's going to do this when he takes a vacation day, but then he says, "It's a vacation day, and that is exactly what I'm going to do." I've always been one that does what I say I'm going to do, no excuses, and this is driving me crazy!!!!! Who wants to sit inside on their behinds on a beautiful day and not take advantage of it? Argggghhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!
Husbands and money
I keep a spreadsheet of our income and expenses for a two-month time span. That way, I know in advance how much, if any, extra cash is left over on payday and can plan for any unusual expenses that might be coming up. Every couple of weeks, I sit hubby down in front of computer and together we look over where the money is going and how much cash we have until the next payday.
I update it every other day as we spend pocket money, unexpected expenses etc., and keep him informed if we are broker than expected. It's never richer than expected unfortunately!
I also take care of all the bills, etc., so it is easy for him to fall into a state of ignorant bliss. But I am an organized computer nerd at heart, so I like playing with the numbers.
But I think if your husband had concrete numbers of your financial situation, he would realize what a difference that $3 can make. Or even see that if he didn't drive home, he would save a gallon of gas a day, x5 days = $20 bucks or whatever.
that's how all husbands should behave..nm
nm
my husbands says this constantly
I think he was joking.
Call me heartless, but if he cannot pay or put out....?
What fun is that?
Easy to say but in reality husbands do not
understand everytime a baby comes in, some can feel threatened by the new one, some can be jealous. You should never ignore your hubby just to give attention to your child. Make sure both have what each needs. One day the child will be grown and out and you might (just minght)be stuck with the same man - although now days not a sure thing!
Most women who kill their husbands SM
get life in prison without parole, whether they deserve it or not.
I usually take the woman's side in this, since I too was an abused wife, but her getting a lenient sentence due to her husband supposedly making her dress up in sexy outfits?
Outcome is debatable. I do always think if all abused wives murdered their husbands and I imagine many deserve it, the streets would be littered with dead husbands.
PS
After my divorce found wonderful man that I thank God for every day.
And then some husbands have their wife spoiled
and give them any and every thing their little heart desires and I am one of those lucky ones. By the way, I don’t even have to cook- he does all that. I am spoiled rotten and loving it.
So THATS how the other women get those nice husbands! (nm)
x
MTs who have husbands that work midnights sm
i'm curious as to how your day goes with a hubby working midnights. mine has been on midnights for four years now. he has a really good job, but can't get on days yet. it's so tough with having two kids that are in elementary school. when i'm ready to get on and work, he wants me to set with him and spend time with him. we're just not on the same page and it's really getting to me. he's not a communicator either.
My husbands check went up a whole dollar - nm
xx
That is precious. It really is. Too many husbands not involved these days! nm
.
Definitely boys for me.
nm
23 and 24 with my boys...sm
I used to be able to climb trees and did the iron kids triathelon with them....
My sister had her child at 42....the only girl outta 7 grandchildren....guess who's grandma's princess?
oh boys
will be boys!
boys
My son is 15 and I cannot tell you how many interviews and interrogations we have had to go through. Every time he has been on a date the parents want to meet us and see our house, etc. I has been a flipping nightmare, especially since these little flings last about a week and are over after the dance! In my humble opinion, find her something else to do. That is what I have had to do with my son. I just can't take the pain anymore. Join some super busy, mega overly scheduled adult supervised something! Shoo, shoo, mama is working!
I don't think so. I have 2 boys. They have
proven that circumcision can be beneficial for several reasons, not to mention it is more hygienic. I was conflicted with my first son because my OB/GYN was against it. She was African-American and I don't know if it was a cultural thing or what. She did do my son, but she didn't take enough off, it wasn't her decision to make. My second son I didn't hesitate.
My mom said that at 8 days she took my brothers to be circumcised - based on the Bible.
I can't see how it would be called abuse. I think it is personal choice. I can't tell you how many reports I've done on men over 50 who have had problems and have had to be circumcised.
Two boys
I have 2 boys; 24 and 19. The older one moved away to college, the school dropped his program after 2 years, so he floundered and moved back home. After 6 months told him get a job, pay his bills, go to school or get out. He went to work FT and paid all his own bills, moved out for a few months with some guys (who did not pay their share of the rent) and then moved back home, went back to college, has made the honor roll for the last year while working, just started in 2009 charging him room and board as he is after all 24. Other son 19, almost lost him to bad decisions and bad friends at 14-15 but is on the right track now; in college and working PT, pays his bills. He goes to the community college, looking into a 2+2 program, told him to go away for the last 2 years as he will get the experience of being on his own without being totally on his own. He has a serious girlfriend. I am more worried about those 2 getting an apartment together first and then him not finishing school. Older son is working on buying a house within 18 months and younger son will live with him (if not with girlfriend first.) I have to say I'm looking forward to an empty nest.
While I don't have boys but -sm
two young girls, 9 and 10, for years I would cover for my DH, get the card, mail it to his mom, make him call her on Mother's Day (remind him 50x)....For years when my kids were babies I would get nothing from him, because as he would say, I was not his mother. Well what about those two squirmy kids of ours, I am their mother. I told him he needed to help them and get a card from them to give to me, or help them make me a card, whatever that did not matter. (I have always made sure he got something from the kids on Father's day). The kids have been able to be the ones to remind him now for the last few years about special days, Mother's Day and my birthday which is great. I don't want much, just a card and Happy B or Mom day, just acknowledgement basically. He had some sort of epiphany a year or two ago and now sends his mom flowers every Mom Day and at Christmas, think this was the 3rd one in a row(guilt and belief they are dying coming to bear now, MIL is 74 but doing quite well), still did not send her a card though, figured the card with the flowers was enough. I made him go out an buy the card (instead of me coving his butt as usual). We all signed it and he mailed it. I never missed with my mom and did something every year until she died. She kept ever one of my cards too, found them after she died. ---I would still send your son a card on his birthday but leave the money out, betcha that will grab his attention. ----My DH doesn't remember anyone's birthday, he forgot mine a few times which stunk. I take care of getting the cards, mailing them, etc., though refuse to do Mom day anymore, I still have to nag at him to call his mom, dad on their birthdays, etc. Some guys are just lazy and don't want to be bothered with it.
Two boys.
I have 2 boys and enjoy them immensely. The oldest drives me nuts with some of the decisions he makes. He is funny, easy going, lots of friends and just doesn't take life too seriously.
My youngest is 17. He is very smart, has big plans for college and career (he says, you don't have to understand what it is mom, you just have to pay for it). My regret is that I wish I'd had more kids. I would take a whole house full of boys. So much fun!!
I raised 2 boys on my own.
Maybe some of these techniques that assisted me can do the same for you:
1) Literally write down a list of rules that you want observed in your home. Not what you think you can get him to do but what you actually WANT. Make copies for his bedroom, for the refrigerator, for his billfold, for every room you can. (I printed mine off and framed them in certificate frames and hung them up. Be specific. Cover all areas.)
2) Literally write down behaviors and language you are not going to tolerate and rank them.
2) Literally write down a list of everything that is important to this youngster. Include friends (by name), electronics (iPod, computer, etc.), privileges (telephone, friends coming over, going out, driving), and places he enjoys going (movies, sports events, eating establishments, etc.). Rank these in order of importance to him.
3) If possible, have your husband (separated, correct?) to meet with you first and agree and provide a united front. Agree on what you expect of him as his parents, what is best for his wellbeing. Write down how you will construct discipline and dispense punishment. Make it appropriate, reasonable and, above all, something you will actually do.
5) Have a meeting with your son (and your husband, if he is onboard with you). Give your son a copy of the new rules, the discipline tactics, the unacceptable behaviors and the punishments. Go over each one of them. Don't argue. Don't explain too much. The lists are clear. Everything has a yes/no as to its use and everything has an if with it as well.
Here's the hardest part: Do what you say. If his language is offensive, he can't talk on the phone. Period. No exceptions, period. Even if you have to unplug it and keep the cord in your pocket. Never argue; never raise your voice. Just calmly make your statement and leave it alone. The more he carries on, the more trouble he will incur. Let him handle the stress of it. If you protect him from the consequences of his actions, he will never, ever change and never learn. (Warning: His behavior WILL get worse before it gets better and then it will wax/wane on occasion just to test the waters.)
Stay with him after school in his tutoring. I showed at school one day in high school for my oldest. One day for 2 classes and that was all it ever took. Made the difference with my youngest, too! Neither one wanted me showing up and sitting next to him in class! Be there but let the teacher do the tutoring. Just be there to enforce his attendance and understand what is happening in the sessions.
Praise good/changed behavior but do not reward it. If it is behavior you are wanting to be an expected behavior, praise it, acknowledge it. Reward exceptional behavior that goes beyond what you have set rules for.
Make sure he is involved in his own caretaking: Laundry, specific chores (no pay -- no ma'am, do not pay any child to contribute to their household), help cook one night a week, yard work, etc.
Be watchful of his music, TV watching, movie going. These can have just as devastating of an impact on him as his so-called friends. Make sure you know who his friends' parents are, what they do; do you agree with how they live? How these friends act? If not, restrict his activities with them.
Get him involved in some type of sport he enjoys and into a youth group if at all possible. It is important.
I hope these tips will help you as much as they did me.
my boys are warriors
Both have been deployed at one time or another to Iraq. One is there now. The other boy told me that he had gone to the funeral of one of his brave friends who had been killed. Those horrible people were there from Kansas, but the Harley people were there also, 200 to 300 of them, each holding a flag, protecting the family of the soldier from the disgusting behavior of that supposed church. Made chills go up and down my spine. Can you imagine that many flags in one place being used to protect a family! GO HARLEY WARRIORS!
boys or girl
I have 2 of each (yes 4 in all) and I would defitenly say boys right now. My kids are still young so may be my mind will change with age!
huh? boys much easier? NOT...NM
Boys do go through stages.
On the other hand, depression can come out as anger.
I think mothers are supposed to help their kids understand their feelings and talk to them, but it can be difficult to get boys to express themselves.
It's think it's a normal stage to go through for boys to just be annoyed by girls because girls are so talkative and different, sometimes dating-obsessed or gossip-obsessed or whatever, and for a boy it's annoying.
Maybe he doesn't enjoy competing with a girl who is older.
I think he would rather spend time with boys right now, but boys need something to do together so they stay out of trouble.
But he needs to realize that he doesn't really hate girls. He just doesn't enjoy the different developmental stages they go through. And your daughter might benefit from knowing how males' brains work - that guys don't admire girls who are obsessed about stuff they think is silly.
Just some thoughts. Parenting is hard, but respect for siblings should be taught, and some space from each other can go a long way.
That's for sure and something I hear over and over. Boys
s
To me it always seems to be harder on the boys (sm)
My husband are like that - oil and water for sure. We just can hardly stand to live together anymore. We have been trying to stay together for the kids for years.
How did affect you and your sister?? Would it have been better if they had stayed together or was it just a bad situation either way? I feel like I am choosing the lesser of the evils.
My boys had to pay me twice as much as their tickets sm
If the ticket was 50.00, they had to pay me 100.00, too. No ifs, ands or buts. Didn't have to take away the keys. This worked every time. They are all good drivers now. None of the speed.
The first of my new boys has arrived. (sm)
Introducing Teddy! He's a Schipperke mix, only about 20 lb. He has a tail, which is very cute and curled, but he's hiding it. I'm new at photographing black dogs, but I think it turned out okay for a first try. He's already had a bath and flea treatment with Frontline Plus, because we're in the South and he had fleas.
Here is a picture of our 3 boys - SM
Max, Scooter, and Bailey
For those of you with teenage boys
I just wanted to share this. Yesterday my 16 yo son said to me, "Mom we should make some Christmas cookies." My older 2 aren't home from college yet so it is just he and I. I bought all the colored sugars, we put on Xmas music and he helped me make the dough, cut out the cookies and decorate them. I share this only because if you have a teenage son you know this is highly unusual when what they really want is to hang out with their friends and play loud music and talk about girls! It really touched me that we had this special time together. I am blessed to have him for a son.
That's the other thing my boys want
--- a tattoo. I told them they could get the airbrush ones at the beach this summer. They're saving up. No permanent ones until they're 18 and they can pay for it.
My sister got one in high school and my parents never knew it until years later. They were still po'ed. My fear with real tattoos is hepatitis. Again, if they're going to do it (which we all know they will), better to have it done professionally.
As a mom of 2 boys, now older,
who played baseball and hockey, do your son a favor and refrain from making a scene. It's embarrassing for him and puts such a negative tone on the game for all the kids. Be the better person, take the higher ground, keep your mouth closed and realize this should be fun for the KIDS.
I have 3 boys, so I can somewhat relate
It seems I can take privileges away from my oldest and it works very well. My younger one, however, doesn't seem to care. What does bother him is sitting on time-out. I read a few books and they say the length of the timeout should be equal to the age - 5 years old then 5-minute timeout. This frustrates him more because he likes to be in control and when I put him on timeout, he has no control. I usually sit him at the dining room chair - no TV, no toys. I use the timer on the microwave, so he can hear it when he beeps. He knows to push the chair in when he gets up. If he does something shortly thereafter, I double the length of the timeout. A few times of this and eventually they catch on.
As for harming the dogs, I would probably keep them in a certain area of the house where I could see them. At least then you know if he's doing something to them and hopefully can stop him before he really hurts them.
As tempting as it is, name-calling will not teach your child anything but name-calling. Taunting him with this is probably not a good idea. If he continues to lie, I would continue to put him on timeout or take away privileges depending on the extent of the lie and the circumstances.
I know it's hard, but consistency is the key. Eventually, he will learn. It just takes some kids longer than others.
Why boys need parents...
This is for those mother's of boys, sisters of boys, and boys that have grown older and anyone else who needs a laugh.
11 year old boys
I am in the same boat. My son does all the things yours is doing right now. Right down to the shower. I am not sure if your son is, but my son has OCD (obsessive complusive disorder)this is worse when he is stressed. He was diagnosed at the age of 3, no he is not on meds and I have used behavior modification for him. Yes the modification works just as well without the harmful side effects of a drug.
I can pass on a few things I have found that work. Only make an issue out of things that can hurt himself or others. Like the hair, yep in the eyes is a pain, but it will not hurt him or anyone and he has control of that. Clothes are the same way, again this is something that at 11 he has control of. I think that is what he is frustrated about. Everything seems out of his control to him. So he is 11 and is stressed and crying is his way right now of letting things out. By allowing him to have control over the smaller things, maybe that will put things into perspective for him again.
Good luck I hope I have helped you in some way.
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