survey on sixteen year old girl curfews - sm
Posted By: momofteen on 2008-09-10
In Reply to:
Just taking a survey from all you parents of 16 yo girls out there...what is your curfew for your teen? Do you let her go out during the school week? If so, how often and what time does she need to be back? What about Friday and Saturday nights? Thanks for participating.
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I think the 14-year-old girl from
Maryland is just wonderful. Such poise, beauty and a great voice. I also like the cowboy with the rope routine!
Okay, here's a question for you from a 13 year old girl (sm)
My roommate's 13 yo daughter came and asked me this morning if I'd ever heard of this. A friend of her's (a girl) told her that she read in a health book that if a boy drinks too much Gatorade/7-UP/Mountain Dew, that they can't make babies. Now me, being 55 years of age, just about died laughing quietly because I find that hard to believe, but I promised I'd put the question out here. Hey, it's been a long time since I read a health book, who knows??? do you??? Could this be true? I told her I'd check it out. Well, are they putting something in these drinks that causes this? TIA.
Any thoughts of a 28-year-old girl and 54 yr old
##
My 8-year-old girl loves Webkinz!
I like to help her decorate her room and make smoothies/sandwiches for her chihuahua. It's really fun. We have two other girls we know that are on her friends list. You can send little gifts and messages. It's safe too.
my 16-year-old girl wanted to give it up, so I did too.
nm
14-year-old girl faces pornography charge
There's got to be a better way of stopping this than possibly having her register as a sex offender at 14.
CLIFTON — A 14-year-old girl faces child pornography charges after she allegedly posted nearly 30 nude pictures of herself on a social networking site, authorities said.
Detectives with the Passaic County Sheriff’s Department’s Internet Crimes Unit arrested the teen Tuesday. The National Center for Missing and Exploited Children contacted sheriff’s detectives about someone posting photos of an underage nude girl on a MySpace profile. The center, which monitors social networking sites for illegal images of children, contacted county detectives through the State Police’s Internet Crimes Against Children Task Force, said Bill Maer, the sheriff’s department spokesman.
Following a month-long investigation, detectives discovered that the person posting the pictures was the same person featured in them — the 14-year-old girl. Anyone who was “friends” with the girl through MySpace or knew her full name could have accessed the photos.
The teen was charged with one count of possession of child pornography and one count of distribution of child pornography. She was released into her mother’s custody, Maer said.
The teen reportedly told police she posted the pictures into a photo album for her boyfriend’s enjoyment. More arrests may be forthcoming, Maer said. Maer said that North Jersey parents should make sure they are aware of their children’s activities on the Internet.
My 7-year-old girl is now wearing a size 6 ladies shoe...sm
I'm afraid to try to guess how much that foot is going to grow before she gets to high school! She's also 2 heads taller than the kids in her class.
12-year old girl forced to take pregnancy test due to school rumor
NEVADA CITY, Calif. -- A 12-year-old girl was forced to take a pregnancy test at school in Nevada City, a lawsuit filed in Nevada County Superior Court alleges.
The Pacific Justice Institute, which is representing the girl, said in a news release that Steve Davis, a counselor at Seven Hills Middle School, pulled the girl out of class.
KCRA 3 has decided not to name the girl out of protection for her privacy.
Davis heard rumors that she was pregnant and wanted to know if it was true, the release said.
Though she denied it and told Davis a classmate had spread rumors about her in the past, the counselor got a pregnancy test from the school nurse and told the 12-year-old to give a urine sample, the Pacific Justice Institute said.
The pregnancy test was negative.
According to the news release, the girl was embarrassed and humiliated, and her parents were angry when they found out.
They worked with the Pacific Justice Institute to get an apology from the Nevada City School District, but didn't receive one.
The lawsuit, filed Oct. 29, 2008, seeks damages for violation of the girl's right to privacy and emotional distress.
"There is no merit in the claim," Superintendent Roger Steel said. He directed further questions to the district's attorney.
Reached at home Monday night, Davis said he had no comment on the lawsuit.
All living in my house have curfews.
My youngest is 19 and lives at home. He has a curfew. He tried the now-that-I'm-18-I-don't-gotta-do-what-you-say stuff but I packed a WalMart bag with his deodorant and his stinky tennis shoes and took my house and car keys off his key ring and told him he couldn't live here if he didn't respect the rules.
He wandered around with friends for a couple of hours then very apologetically came back and we haven't had any trouble since.
You are not too hard. If she wants to make her own rules, she needs to support herself. Adult decisions should be made by adults - that means supporting herself.
We did curfews for a couple of reasons
Our 3 oldest kids are in their 30s now. Here's what we did with them and will do with the 2 teenagers when they finish high school.
CURFEWS - absolutely because 1) with the layout of our house they had to walk right by our room to get to theirs and we had to get up early to work to support the household
2) we both believe there's nothing good going on after midnight
3) the kids were always welcome to have friends over or be on the phone on weekend nights
4) the kids were expected to get up in the mornings and go to jobs or help with chores or the younger kids or whatever. Nobody got a free ride from high school graduation on.
Did we have a few skirmishes? Sure. But if there was a particular reason to be out, a movie, concert, then we were flexible.
We all survived it and we will with the younger two as well. You and yours will too. Just remember to keep the most important thing - your sense of humor.
curfews and adult children
We went through this with both our kids, and repeatedly I tried to get it through their heads (okay, thick skulls, lol!) that I worry about their safety, that I NEED to know that they're safe. I told them also that their driving privileges could be revoked if I saw fit (I'm not sure they believed I would actually do that, though, and I ended up never needing to go that far). But the main thing that I think finally got through to them is that I really do genuinely worry. I can't sleep peacefully when they're home from college or home visiting now, if they're not back under the roof here when they say they will be. (I don't have as big an issue with that when they're at college or living in their own place; then, a once weekly call is enough to keep my quiet!) I've also been known to ask for extra contact numbers of their friends, in case their cell phone dies or they lose it or whatever (yes, it has happened, and the extra contact numbers have come in handy). But the agreement with the extra contact numbers is that I won't use them unless there is a true emergency here or they haven't checked in at their agreed upon frequency. They don't want me to embarrass them to their friends because Mommy is checking up on them.
Whether it is safe for an 18-year-old to be out after midnight is perhaps a relative question - relative to where you live, what the night-life in your area is like, how many deer cross the backroads randomly during deer season, whether you live in an urban area with a lot of party clubs that 18yo kids don't need to be tempted to visit, etc. You get the idea.
But first and foremost, get it through her head that you need to know that she is safe, that she needs to check in with your regularly if she's going to be out late.
As for my kids - we got through those rocky years, and now when I go to visit them, they expect ME to call THEM to let them know that I arrived home safely. Life is good!
We had no curfews for our adult children.
And I consider 18 an adult.
As each of our children reached age 18, we had a frank discussion with them and laid out what we expected of them. We told them that they were now basically non-paying roommates. Because we loved them and wanted to give them a boost into adult life, we kept our home open to them, paid their living expenses, and supported them in pursuit of their dreams. But as parents, we worry. All curfews and restrictions were dropped the day they turned 18. They didn't have to tell us where they were going or what they were doing. But we asked that they not worry us. We requested that they give us approximate times of coming and going. I needed to know whether they would be eating with us, and basically at what hour I should start worrying if they hadn't returned home. I also asked that since we were paying their tuition (high school and college) that they keep good grades. Our first son was not a great student, and we told him that we did not consider paying his way to college a good investment of our hard-earned money. We asked him to prove his seriousness by working, attending community college full-time and paying the community college tuition himself. He did that, received good grades, and then transferred to a state university with our blessing and tuition assistance. Since our sons drove our cars, we told them that we would not allow them the use of our car if they stayed out later than expected without calling home or had any driving issues, or God forbid, drinking. Any major infractions, drugs, drinking, legal issues, and we'd close our home to them, as well.
The discussion was very honest. They told us what they wanted from us, too, which was to be treated as adults. That was fine with us. We gave them quite a bit. A place to live, a car to drive, an education, and respect. They gave us respect in return, and actually never stayed out very late. On occasion, if stayed out longer on weekends, they called or left text messages so that we wouldn't worry if their plans went later than expected.
Children need to learn to act like adults. We have to treat them as adults, but it's also fine to give them a bit of help as they head out into the world on their own. If your child is a responsible teenager, likely the transition to adulthood won't be so bumpy (but do expect a few bumps). Just sit down and talk about expectations, listen to your child, and come to an agreement. I think that I enjoy my adult relationship with my children much more than I did when they were young. And after all, if we live out even an average life span, we will know our children as adults much longer than we know them as children. Best to get use to them being adults!
I don't set strict curfews for mine. I can't because of her activities. sm
How do you all work around school activities and curfews? My 16-yod works, is varsity cheerleader, tennis player, in theater, etc. Even school activities like away games sometimes it is like midnight or later before they get home. As long as she is keeping up her grades and I know where she is at all times, I pretty much let her be. She has a cell and I know I can call her at any moment to get a hold of her. She lets me know the plans ahead of time so I can know when to expect her home. She is the one that suffers if she doesn't get enough sleep. I may be wrong but I believe in being too strict too. In my town, they have midnight bowling for teens and a lot of the kids get together after football games and watch movies. These to me are much better than being at some party and as long as she is behaving, I let her go. We have a very open communication though and she tells me just about everything so I don't worry. I am proud to have a 16-yo virgin at this time which is more than I can say for myself. If she has no specific activity planned, her curfew is midnight but that is very rare. I think there are a lot of varieties and things to take into consideration especially individual personality of the teen as well as school activities and the friends they hang out with.
survey
How old are you? 63
How long have you been an MT? 12 years
What state are you in? Florida
Is it cold where you are tonight/today? No, 70 degrees
What is your favorite thing to do in your spare time? spending time with my daughter and husband, when I have spare time
Who did you most want to be like when you were a kid? My mom
If you weren't an MT what would your career choice be? stay at home mom sewing , knitting and crocheting
If you could go on vacation to anywhere in the world where would you go? Israel
Last but not least...
If you won 1 million dollars and couldn't spend it on yourself what would you do with it? Go to Israel and live there with my family
Survey
How many of you get up and get dressed like a normal job?
I am in a rut. I crawl out of bed about 15 minutes before work every morning. Enough time to make breakfast basically. I work a split shift so after 4 hours I'm done, take my shower, etc. Just wondering if this is the normal routine an MT falls in.
Vet survey
How much do you pay to take your dog in to get their shots? Do you buy heart worm medicine from them or a mail order company?
time for another survey
Are you superstitious and if so about what?
quick, someone! we need a new survey or
fill in the blanks list to have fun with !!! Anybody?  I so bored.
This is my survey answer.
How old are you? 72
How long have you been an MT? 51 years
What state are you in? CA
Is it cold where you are tonight/today? No
What is your favorite thing to do in your spare time?
Enjoy life with husband and family.
Who did you most want to be like when you were a kid? More like what - nurse & wife
If you weren't an MT what would your career choice be?
Medical Field - nurse or doctor's office
If you could go on vacation to anywhere in the world where would you go? Am a homebody at heart.
Last but not least...
If you won 1 million dollars and couldn't spend it on yourself what would you do with it? Family, friends, and missions.
Tattoo Survey!
Where do you have your tattoo and how big is it? I have decided after many years of wanting a tattoo that this summer for my 40th, I am going to finally treat myself! Husband and I are having a difference of opinion though on where I should have it (I'm thinking lower back or back of shoulder - he says he doesn't like those and thinks it should be my hip)...
A survey. See inside
Just wondering - those of you who have 16/17 year old children, what are your rules on going out during the week, other than sports or work. I let my teen go out "socially" on Friday and Saturday night. During the week I feel should be dedicated to school and her part-time job and I'm okay with maybe going for coffee in the afternoon if there is time, or maybe even dinner, but not all the time and don't feel she should be out at night. Especially now that days are shorter and we're headed towards winter.
Just wondering how everyone else does it with their teens.
Survey: Where do you set your thermostat? Here is why I ask...
I keep my house at 70, but I am looking at what is "usual and normal" because I think I am off here. Looking for opinions...
I am so cold all the time. I am fine if I am up cleaning the house or out shopping and walking, moving in some way. You know, we sit all the time and work, which is when I am having my problem. I sit at my desk in long underwear, sweats and 2 pair of socks. I often tie scarves or an old flannel receiving blanket on my head (okay, I am short on stuff and this works) to keep the heat in my body. I have a space heater by my feet. I drink hot tea or coffee all day long. I am STILL cold!!!!
I keep my thermostat at 70. I have a mobile home, but it has extra insulation and keeping it at 70, my highest gas bill for heat was only $100 last year. I feel badly that I keep it that high, but perhaps I am not thinking this through. You don't use a setback thermostat with a mobile home because you risk freezing your pipes, and it has an odd way of holding heat anyway.
Rant about survey takers. sm
My electric bill is sky high, so I called the electric company to obtain a free survey and to ask questions to help lower the bill. A nice gentleman came to my home and offered good advice.
Today, I received a phone call asking about my experience with their service. I was happy with the service and told them that, however, it was a survey taker and every minute portion of my experience from requesting this service to practically what the guy was wearing was asked of me. I was on the phone for ten minutes, asking when this survey would end, and she said a few more questions, until it was 15 minutes and I hung up on her. I told her several times I was working and could not speak for long. I just needed to rant.
I don't meet the survey target , but
my two boys had a 10:00 p.m. curfew on school nights when they were 16. Curfew was 11:00 on weekends, unless something special was happening. I was told I was absolutely barbaric for setting such early times. My kids didn't tell me that. Other parents did. Not that I cared, mind you.
Each son proved himself to be trustworthy and responsible, and so the day they turned 18, all curfews were lifted. I only asked as a matter of courtesy that they tell me where they were going and give me an approximate time to expect them home so that I knew when to officially start worrying. They didn't have to tell me, but I asked them to tell me, which they did. In fact, for the first week or so after they turned 18 they'd ask me for permission to do something or go somewhere, and I'd reply, "Why are you asking me? You're an adult!" LOL!
They are 18 and 20 now, and doing just fine. The 18 year-old is commuting to a university in our city. He refers to us as his college roommates.
anonymous herpes survey - sm
How common do you think it is? I think it is very, very common. Statistics show it affects about 1 in 3 people. Do you know anyone who has it? (self included?)
I know a few people who have it.
lets hear it for the boy -Survey
Okay, Christmas is next week. Our guys....they burp, they change the channels on the TV faster than we can figure out what is on, and other too numerous to count obnoxious guy behaviors, but what is good about them? What do we love about them?
As for me...in my darkest hour, he was my friend.
Merry Christmas!
A survey on CNN favored Obama
x
Bigger issue - a 16 year old living withi a 29 year old and liability
Are you still not responsible for him until he is 18, how can he tell you where he will live? Unless he emancipates himself and he does something wrong, can they go against you since you are his mother and legally responsible for him? I worry more about him living with a 29 year old sister rather than returning a house key to me that is a bigger issue.
My 14-year-old is going to be a mother-in-law (so funny) if you google it and 11-year-old daughter
x
Won $2,000 on slot machine on New Year's Eve. What a way to start the year. nm
!
Set my budget a year in advance, save all year and
nm
What a difference a year makes! Last year, sm
we had the same problem. Fines everywhere for watering.
Paid $60,000 on principal last year and this year
planning on another $30,000 after my taxes paid for the year. We are getting our house paid down very quickly.
55-year old woman has birthday sex with 12-year old
DAYTON - Gloria Murphy gave children celebrating her 55th birthday alcohol and then had sex with a 12-year-old boy at the party on Thursday, Jan. 29, according to police.
The boy got into Murphy’s bed at 5440 Rawlings Drive, where the married woman had sex with her adolescent neighbor, according to police and Montgomery County prosecutors.
Two of the children at the party ran home at about 6 a.m. Jan. 30 and told a parent they saw the boy and woman having sex, according to 911 audio.
The parent then called police at about 6:15 a.m., according to a police report and 911 audio.
Murphy did not force the boy to have sex, but since he is younger than 13, it is considered rape, Lt. Patrick Welsh said. No other children were involved in the sexual encounter, but some other children at the party consumed alcohol, according to police.
A 17-year-old would have the same goals as a 20 year old (sm)
Only the 20 year old is hopefully more responsible and based on what you say about his character, would be a better choice than someone her own age.
I have a 9-year-old son that sounds just like your 10 year old...
Lately he has been so negative about everything...trying to make him have a good summer and whenever I take him somewhere, he is just a brat when we get home...I think they are called tweens at this age...not quite teenagers but have the attitude like one---LOL
We skipped it entirely last year, and THIS year?
This 40-year-old got dumped for a 30-year-old
http://www.gqmagazine.co.uk/CoolNewStuff/Photos.aspx?StoryID=53859
This year will be our 35th year
The first couple years it was literally 5 or 6 times a day every day (more on the weekends). Over time it gradually slowed down (once a day) and over the past few years its been 2 or 3 times a week. Not sure that is average or not. There were times were I felt it was too much and him not enough, then there were times where I wanted it more and he didn't. Guess everyone goes through a phase. I guess because of how long we've been together, now it's just comfortable - nothing exciting about it. Just a routine. I have to make it exciting in my mind and pretend I'm someone else.
I don't know what it is, but you are correct...after awhile the lust and infatuation wears off and you get in a routine. I guess for us it was that we really didn't know each other when we married (we dated for 3 weeks then eloped). Once I got to know him it was too late. Now 35 years later it is just comfort (and amazingly we never once used birth control and never had any kids). My mom still tells me she's amazed at the frequency of our encounters that not even once did I even have a "close call" with getting pregnant.
But 35 years once or twice a week and 3 or 4 times on weekends. Not sure if that is normal.
That little girl
For those of us who lived through the "British Invasion", or even if you didn't but saw replays of some of the groups singing, you would remember that the teen girls would scream and cry. Cry. Yes. So when I saw that pitiful-looking little girl, I thought she was planted there sort of as a flashback to the British Invasion period. If that was the reason, it did not work out well. They should have had a group of them doing that. As it was, it just made her look like she desperately needs a psychiatrist.
but did you notice how enthralled she was with Sanjaya? that's why I think it is millions of little girls that age voting for him.
Just my thoughts. My other thought is that AI seems to have run its course.
Go girl!
Go get 'em!! You sound like you've got a good plan. I wish you the very best of luck!
Girl, let me tell you...sm
I know...what's up with her snotty attitude lately? And running for senator, puhleeze! She is so ugly to everyone, including Victor...she best watch it or he'll kick her off her high horse...
you go girl!
nm
You go girl...
Way to go! You are a force to be reckoned with...Congratulations on your victory! Here's to ya... !(I'm in the ATL area also...hey neighbor!)
I'm with you girl...
My DH loves camping...I told him when he buys a luxury RV, then I'll go~~~maybe~~~ I'm more along the lines of a resort in Key West, now that's a vacation....and ABSOLUTELY NO WORKING...
Me too!...This girl does not...
sleep in an RV, tin can trailer or a tent, let alone on the ground! Hotels all the way for me...don't mind hiking, backpacking, etc...just give me a good room at the end of the day!
I could have been that little girl.
My mom had mental health issues, but back in the 1960s, no one talked about such things. Our house was a horrible mess, and I knew it. I had dirty clothes which were usually old hand-me downs from a cousin. It was really awful growing up. Right up until I was about 13 or so, I used to beg my mother to do "normal" things, like let me have friends over. It was always a disaster. I just didn't understand that she wasn't capable of being like other moms. Eventually, I stopped having friends over, learned to do my own laundry, and worked like crazy in our house to clean and cook. It was a small town, and everyone knew that I had taken on the role of woman-of-the-house. My friends' mothers would invite me over to give me a break and let me be a kid. I eventually stopped even trying to have them at my house. It was torture to even try.
What I'm saying is, let your daughter go to the party. As someone mentioned, you can offer to help. It's very likely that the little girl is painfully aware that her home life is different from her friends. It's not her fault that she lives the way she does. If she's anything like I was, more than anything, she needs friends and to have some normalcy in her life.
that little girl...
I feel for you and what you went through. I have a friend (almost 39 years) who was that girl and my mother encouraged our friendship even though I had doubts - peer pressure. Her mother had mental problems as did her step-father but what a great family. I was in situations and at the age of around 9 I knew it was not "normal" - don't get things in the mind..nothing going on in the family that was perverted!! It was just how they lived but they were such a loving family and I am proud to call Neva my friend as she has been for almost 40 years. I thank my mother that she never judged and still does not (I can be a pain in the ass) and found such a wonderful friend that will be my friend until the day I die. So mom's out there..there may be great friendships that will last for life - don't worry so about things unless need be!!!
Thanks! I owe you, girl!
I'm so proud to show off my new boy.
You go girl!
Man do I hate that phrase but guess it says it in this case.
Why do people always assume we have to be indebted to our parents/children for the rest of our lives. As we get older this is the time we are suppose to take care of ourselves, and for once in our lives think about ourselves. We raised our children, watched them grow from children into adults, put them through school, rooted (sp?) for them at their sports games, supported their ups and downs, watched them proudly at their wedding, or supported them if they decided to be with another person and not marry. We did everything for them. Now when we are at the age of retirement and want to take time for ourselves and think about ourselves for a change we are called selfish and are supposed to feel guilty?????? Give me a break! So who is going to take care of us when we need it? Retirement is the age of "me". That's not a selfish wish, it's what happens in life. Yes we are here to support our kids (emotionally - who are no longer kids), and financially if we can if they need it or if we want to slip them a $20 in their pocket from time to time for no reason, but I'm with the above poster. It's my golden years its now time for me! Life is about growing, knowing who we are, learning about ourselves. Society forces us to follow the bandwagon meaning...your born, you go to school, you graduate and get a job, you get married, have kids, watch your kids grow, retire and take time for yourself. Not once have I ever seen anything talking about getting to know oneselves before going and getting married to another. I do not believe we are born in life just to always take care of other people. We've given enough of ourselves to others. It's now time for me.
You go girl!
I agree with you 100%. Sterotypal stuff doesn't fly well with me either. I am 58 and I also listen to loud rock music, dance when I am cleaning, and read Elle and other more youthful magazines (saying that because they don't usually address my age group!). I say if you want to do it, do it! Feel better yet??
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