sounds like you have a very responsible son!
Posted By: ALMT on 2008-03-31
In Reply to: pierced ears - stephanie
that's awesome. He hasn't pushed the issue so I may just wait until he asks again. i also need to check the policy at school regarding boys wearing earrings.
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Yes, but if only 1 kid responsible, do you really think
the whole school would be given notice of being punished? Think about it. I am sure and anyone who does this type of work knows there are products out there to help a gaseous distention. My goodness. My DIA parapro here in Georgia and she tells me when her classroom children do things like this and she tells them to say excuse me - they tell her their parents don't mind. You all need to research this a little and I am sure you would be surprised as to whether medically related or attention getting actions.
You are not responsible for others
especially in an age group like this, just as you are not responsible for your parents. When you are grown, responsible for your own actions. Saying this did not have to happen- your life is written before you are born and no matter, that is already decided. This is the way it was supposed to be or never would have happened. I am not saying this is horrible situation but just the way these lives were supposed to start and if not this way, another way but I believe things are going to happen like your whole life is already planned out. Make plans but does not matter.
There are a lot of responsible and
a lot of irresponsible 15 year olds out there. In our state you can't get a license until you are at least16 and 3 months and then after driver's ed and behind the wheel. At 15 my son was definitely responsible enough. My daughter will be 15 in January and I don't know if I would say the same about her. You are the parent and you know your child and what they can and can't handle.
You are not responsible if he won't help himself (sm)
Tell him you think he needs to go to be observed a little while at the mental ward at the hospital. If he will not work and will not go get welfare, that is his problem, not yours. He should not expect you to take care of him if he won't even apply for welfare - anyone can fill out the paperwork for that, good grief. I think I would have to tell him off really well...or seriously tell him that since he won't do anything at all to take care of himself, he needs to go to a nursing home or mental hospital. Tell him you will have him committed.
be responsible and fix your cat.
nm
No matter how responsible you are
and how much time you spend with them, you cannot be there 24-7 to supervise them. That is completely unrealistic. Can we take them to the doctor, to the store, to the kids' school? Come on now.
There is a responsible way to crate an animal. No matter how much you train them, my labs still would have eaten anything in site for a certain period of time. There is no way I would leave them unattended to run my errands and chance them getting into something that could harm them. Regardless of the material objects as you call them, they could get hurt.
Also, a child does need a crib and a playpen. To say that those are used so that you do not have to supervise your kids is ridiculous. Everyone has to go to the restroom at some point. Should we carry them everywhere or perhaps let them run around so they can get into something that would harm them until we finish our business? Wow....
I believe a pediatrician would even tell you that those are necessary in raising a healthy child, and I am not talking about someone who puts their kids in a playpen all day instead of spending time with them either.
No, he is an adult and responsible for himself.
nm
Too bad some responsible adult...
could not get those kids. We have a celebutard, immature, crazy mother against a wanna be anything hanger on who is only interested in money...some role models! I hope there is money put away for the therapy those kids will need. The parents even give white trash a bad name!
no, it is not all a matter of responsible
ownership. There have been very loving responsible owners themselves attacked by their own dogs. A popular dog breed can be overbred indiscriminately and ruined. Unfortuntately this breed is too unpredictable. I've always been around animals, large and small and have both now. I would never have a pit bull. I visit my friend less often now who now has one, and won't get out of the car if it is loose. Not to mention that these dogs don't just bite, which would be bad enough, they instinctively go for the kill. I haven't read the link you provided yet, but do NOT believe that breed-specific legislation is stupid. This particular bill may be over the top, but breed-specific laws are brought on by a need, and wouldn't get off the ground without plenty of facts on record to support it.
A responsible owner would never allow...sm
Their pitbull to wander around public. That is why we have attacks. Owners should be responsible and keep them as well as any dog in a fenced in yard. Or if out in public on a leash. Mine will never be wandering around in public on its own. That is totally irresponsible. If I saw a pitbull out in public I would be cautious myself.
Dear Responsible
I think responsible and owner of pitbull somehow just does not go together.
The owners who are not responsible are ...sm
the problem. I would be mad too if I went out and was approached by a pit bull who growled at me, and I own a pitbull. He should be kept in his owners yard or home. No dog, pit or otherwise, should be allowed to roam around the neighborhood.
I fully understand you being furious. I would be too.
You are not responsible for any loonies out there
By having feedback like I got from this site, gave me an understanding of how to approach this sorta awkward situation. You just have people out there that seem to thrive on what they perceive to be right and what is the actual truth.
Yes. Make your teenager responsible for as much as she can pay for.
and maybe a little more. Don't make it easy. Make sure that she has to work a little (not so much that grades suffers), has to budget, and plan and take the responsibility of driving seriously. This is more than likely the most dangerous thing your child has done so far her life. Make sure she understands that. It's not a social thing, a drive-around-with-your-friends thing. Preparing a young person for driving responsibilities is life and death.
Unfortunately, in the last three yeas, I've been to three funerals for teenage drivers -- all of whom were out of control in every aspect of their lives. Our state does not allow children to become licensed drivers until age 16-1/2. Our house rule was age 17. We did pay for the driver's ed, because it was pricey, our sons truly could not afford it, and we wanted our boys to have ever chance to learn to drive safely. Even though we taught them ourselves, as well, sometimes kids hear better what total strangers say to them! Also, I had a rule during permit driving sessions with my boys. They were never allowed to argue with me while we drove together. I was the teacher. I knew more than them. No arguing over anything, or else I terminated the lesson, car was pulled over, I drove home and that was the end until I felt we were ready for another driving lesson. That rule drove home how serious a responsibility driving is. I only had to do it once to one of my sons.
My oldest was lucky enough to inherit is grandfather's pristine 1991 Toyota (38,000 original miles) when pop-pop no longer could drive. It's a decent, dependable car. My son pays for repairs and gas. We pay for the insurance at this point, simply because we live in a big eastern city, and insurance is sky high. But, our son is also paying his own college tuition, so I have no problem helping him out with the insurance on his car.
This is a big deal. Make sure your daughter grasps the gravity of the responsibility. Don't argue with her about anything. These decisions have to be made by the parents, because it's a health and safety issue for your daughter and everyone else on the road with her.
Make him responsible for the decision
If he wants to switch schools and give up the scholarship, tell him he has to get the funding to do it. I had to do the same thing with my daughter. She gave up a good scholarship at a great private school for pharmacy because she wanted to come back closer to home to be around her boyfriend. She ended up having to take out the loans to pay for it.
There is nothing written in stone that says we have to pay for our children's educations. It is nice if you can help as a parent, but I think kids learn much more if they have some of their own resources invested.
Dear Ms Thinks she is responsible
Truely funny how pitbull owners go on the defensive with what other dogs do. I am sure animal control knows how to be around and handle but even these people are attacked by these dogs. I rescue animals (not these as I want no responsibility for their acting out)but where I rescue these dogs are not adopted out, just put down. Even the people who are in the "know" so to speak do not want to be responsible.
YOU are not responsible for his debts, HIS ESTATE is....
You should read the posts better.
Was your brother your stepbrother and your mother your stepmother?
Therefore you did not care to help in locating your stepnephew/niece, so that they can get their shares?
No, you can not be held responsible for their bill -
nm
You shouldn't feel responsible....
As mean as it sounds, you have put up with it and YOU have decided for yourself that enough is enough and if you tell him so and IF he bounces back to alcoholism, then basically he is a grown man and that is HIS choice, you cannot let it affect you or make you feel responsible.
My sister-in-law is in the same boat as far as her husband being an alcoholic. It has put so much stress on her and their children and it has been going on about 15 years. He won't seek help though and she won't leave him. She just says that she is hoping one day he wakes up and sees what a good wife she is. I feel bad for her that she has wasted so much time on someone like that.
You are only responsible for changing your behavior, not someone elses
I am the product of a divorce years and years ago and thank goodness my mother had enough sense to not stay with my father. He was actually caught running around on her with other women. I knew my father growing up, spent time with he and my stepmom, loved her but I missed absolutely nothing by not having him in my house every day. You are responsible for your own self-. The advice you are giving is like saying a man messes around on a woman, drinks too much and maybe after the marriage he will change. You can only make yourself happy, no one else can do that for you. I have never had a time when I could not stand my husband, never and I would believe he probably feels the same. We laugh when others say they have to work at marriage- we just do not get this. Like I said, product of divorce, happily married myself, never missed my father, saw him but never, ever close in my life. By the way, I am one of the older and wiser group also.
Because you breed out of wedlock then that makes you a responsible person?
Sorry, not where I come from. I am so glad I did not bring home (well years ago it just WAS NOT done) children. If a female got pregnant, sent away to an unwed mother home, most of the time the child given up for adoption. When I was growing up you did not pop out babies right and left without a husband. I have had more than my share of responsibility, been able to stand on my own 2 feet and provide really well for my family. I made the right decision for me and do not regret and have never looked back on my decisions.
I completely believe Howard Stern is responsible for both Daniel
much for it just to be overdoses in two cases. I don't buy it.
I see where you are coming from because I would be nagged by guilt and feeling responsible
for the problem. I have those tendencies too. No way should you cash your IRA for a car.
O talks about our government being fiscally responsible and his wife is wearing $500 designer shoes.
It's not "her money to spend as she pleases." It's my money, your money, his money, her money. O better put up or shut up and that means his family too. No more big talk about the deficit, fiscal responsbility, and redistribution of wealth when when his wife is walking around in designer duds. Am I the only person that sees hypocrisy in that?
You may be, from the sounds of your posts, sounds like an *illegal*
and that in itself is a crime. Nobody else would take 65.00 for an entire day slaving/laundry, heavy cleaning, etc. LOL. Nah, I don't think so. I'm just saying, what it sounds like to me. : )
He sounds wonderful...sounds like you two have a relationship (sm)
based on love and nothing superficial at all. I'm glad you appreciate him and are so grateful for him. Best wishes & continued happiness to you both :-)
Sounds like you are doing everything right...
Hang in there. It sounds to like you are doing everything right. I totally agree that kids are under too much pressure these days and that they certainly need to be given more time to just be kids. Being a single mom I try make sure that my children grow up to be responsible adults with good morals and values, but I also make sure that they have their space so they have a chance to make their own choices (when possible) and see the consequences of those choices. Being a parent is certainly not easy and doing it in today's society is stressful to say the least.
As for your neighbor, I think she could take some lessons from you. Good luck and keep your chin up!!!
Sounds to me like . . .
she has the attention she wanted, it's almost like you took her bait. She sent you nasty Emails and now you are begging her to forgive you. You know the the saying "Don't cast pearls before swine". Sounds like she can more easily respond to the negative rather than the positive. Anyway, what would you do if she forgave you? Be her friend again? Until she changes her heart, you're better off, keep your distance. She sees your goodness as weakness. It's probably fun for her to make you uncomfortable. Maybe deep down she is jealous of you. Don't hate her, be sad for her. Don't fall into her games.
sounds like a CC I used to have, which did--sm
pretty much the same thing. They said it was their *annual fee* and, like you, I just paid it to keep the peace and close the account. Personally I think it is a scam just to get a few more dollars out of you, but how do you prove it and who do you complain to??? I don't have credit cards any longer either. Learned my lesson too. what a rip!
Sounds like (sm)
your FIL has two abled bodies to care for him already. Why should you go back? It would probably be nice if you checked in once in a while and took your 2-year-old to visit, but moving back sounds like it would put a strain on things. Your husband may be feeling guilty and feels the need to "help". Explain to him that helping is taking some groceries once in a while or offering to pick-up meds, etc. You, your husband, and child would be probably a breath of fresh air once in a while if you were to just visit on occasion. Moving back seems a little like overkill, but it is tough because when it is family you want to give it your all! Also, there is one in every family that "freeloads". Let them figure it out for now. Hope your FIL is feeling better soon and hope you can find your way to be helpful without having to sacrifice your new home.... Take care and good luck...
sounds mean . . .sm
but when my daughter and husband were pulling that on me I told my daughter it was not safe that she could die very easily in the front seat or get hurt very badly. She quit asking, daddy quit doing it. Now she is 12-1/2 and no problem there, she is 5Ƌ" and weighs about 130 pounds. But I used to get SO FRUSTRATED!!! Daddy's little girl . . . .
Don't know that one, but it sounds sm
like a good time. if you are in for an evening away from the parks. I have friends who own Sleuth's dinner theater. Three theaters, dinner included, plus one is only for kids, I think. You enjoy a great dinner, and a murder mystery play, where you take part in solving the mystery. It is right on Universal Drive and I think the website is sleuths.com
sounds like your going to anyway.
but i would urge you to proceed with caution, go very very slowly. When it seems too perfect, too good to be true, it may be wrong. One of my first thoughts is that if he is the spiritual man you think, ie, Christian, he might not have had 2 divorces -- not always the case, but often times. you both need to know what your own faults are and be careful to not make the same mistakes. More than anything (outside of knowing each other very well, nonintimately) is have real committment on both sides, the determination to stay with the marriage. i married a man with 2 divorces too -- 25 yr later we're still married. But it was sheer determination to make it work on my part, lots of prayer and such. I did endure what one should not have to, to get to this point. Once i was into it, i certainly understood how come he had been divorced twice. Wishing you the best.
Sounds like now as of this a.m.
Apparently the so-called lawyer owns a business called Hot Lips Smoochy or something like that and has never tried any cases at all. He is apparently the executor of her estate. Now isn't that convenient? He tells the photographer Daddy that she lost the baby, but she winds up having a baby anyway 9 months later. The photographer breaks it off with her because she is drinking while pregnant. Oh my, the gossip. She looks like she's all drugged-up on any interviews I've seen, and I saw one last night from 3 days before her death. She is wearing dark glasses for the first part (inside), and they go outside, and she takes the glasses off. Makes no sense. I don't know, but what does Granny want with the baby now? That poor baby! So many Daddies?????? I have never seen men trying to prove they ARE the father in all of my life? Twists and turns this story has, which I'm sure has the producers in Hollywood salivating. There will be books and there will be moves. Life happens, I guess.
It sounds to me like you are not even willing --sm
to compromise on this and want everything YOUR way. What arrangement does HE want? Do you even know? You never said what HE would like. It is just my opinion, but it does not sound like you are even ready to get married, if you cannot find a way to compromise on even this small detail. Good luck to you.
Sounds to me like you were just being
very thoughtful, and I bet he appreciates you as much as you seem to appreciate him. What a wonderful thing!
She sounds like quite a gal . . .
especially the part about being a practicing Buddhist. She probably marched to the beat of a different drummer. The doctors might have saved her but who knows what quality of life she might have. My mom, dad, aunts all were healthy until their 80s. They end up in a nursing home. My aunt is 90, she's really been dying for a year, they keep on prolonging it. I think death at some point may be a blessing. You're going through a mourning process. Your tears are for you, you'll miss her, she'll be in a better place. You are going to have to brace up and take comfort in your faith.
Actually should be It sounds.....nm
nm
sounds like my SIL
We had a chow years ago. We raised him from a pup and he was very protective of all of us but especially the kids. ANY kids for that matter.
The kids in the yard, someone comes up the driveway, he was there. Would not let anyone get between him and those kids. Didn't matter if they were our kids or their friends. He never bit anyone but he wasn't going to let anyone take "his" kids either.
Never did that to the parents of the kids either, just total strangers that he didn't know. For Chow's, he had an exceptional personality and never saw him so much as growl at anyone. He would bark but would back away as he was barking.
My SIL's chow is a rescue so who knows how he was raised.
She just sounds like someone who has --sm
to pick and pick until she starts an arguement. Try to ignore her. If you don't give her what she wants, she will go away. just my opinion.
sounds like it to me . . .
I've seen two physicians recently, one who specializes in anxiety, and they think the crude policy under my current company of having to "make up" any time I take off is burning me out, promotes physical and mental self-neglect and is fueling an anxiety disorder. "That's sick," is actually what one said, and put me on a mild anxiolytic temporarily and told me to find a way out. The company says "everyone else does it" like I'm some kind of freak or bad MT, but in talking to other MTs there I'm finding the majority saying no they're not or they are frying themselves out doing it and have also complained about it. Having to always "make up" a day off is not a day off and does not promote rest. I'm having to learn to take the doctors' advice I'm typing for, letting go and taking care of myself. :-) The consequences of not doing so are much more dire. It kills me they have an EAP program. Seems to me investing in just letting people have a life would be more efficient. Recently bought out, the new company acted like it was a plus to keep this crappy policy. Yeah, right.
I'm really, really close to singing "Take this job and shove it . . . " Shame, because it's an otherwise decent company, um, unless you want a life.
Watching all my family enjoy this weekend as a 3-day weekend while I type. Sometimes I wake up and cry before starting work because I feel like I can't get a break from this job without consequences.
WORDS OF WISDOM: When applying for an MT job, ASK CAREFULLY about the EXACT way "time off" is calculated and quiz their MTs, not the administrative people who have never done MT. What looks good on paper . . .
Sounds like they don’t have a pot to
pi..s… in. These sound like grown folks and I do not consider myself a bank, therefore do not loan money out even to my grown KIDS. Only could a child move in with me if they were sick and unable to take care of their own self. Sounds like they have no responsibility about financial business. Sorry they would just have to do things on their own. Loaning money (or giving it away, whatever the case is) only makes relationships strained. I do not sign as collateral for anyone, do not take stray folks in, do not run a banking business.
sounds
That sounds very pretty. You can also do just a border around the top of the wall with the sponge paint effect. That way it keeps it from being too much green!
Sounds to me like
although getting paid, maybe not the right 1 to be trying to watch the kids. I am a grandmother myself. This sounds like she is irritated by their actions and maybe they did kick her more than you OR maybe with her older legs it just hurts her more. My legs now are a lot different from when I had children as far as the aches and pains, even bruises and sometimes cuts just show up without your knowing where they exactly came from. Yes, she is offended they said something about her legs (even though on the 7 year old I would know probably too young to really understand what the veins were) but she is getting back at them now and trying to get her point across - even if they arent understanding she is trying to make them understand. I don’t see this as a really workable situation. It has been 2 weeks and already everyone at everyone else. Not a good situation. Pretty soon grandmom and kids just doing tit for TAT at each other. Maybe a good sit down and talk it over or else grandmom goes back home and you get someone who is a little younger and able to corral the kids better?
Sounds like you are doing everything right to me - sm
I lived at home for years as it was too expensive to get your own place where my parents were unless you had a really, really good income, which I did not have unfortunately. I did not have a firm curfew once I went to college but it was understood they prefered I be home by 1 a.m. which I ususally abided by, if I knew I was going to be out later I told them, or if I was not coming home at all, I told them. They always knew who I was out with too, and the general plan for the evening. I never really resented it, yeah it was a drag sometimes but at least they cared enough to ask and try and keep me out of trouble (they don't know half of the stupid stuff I did do and never got in trouble for; i.e. going out with stranger met in a parking lot, that sort of stuff, nothing criminal). One thing that will stop her from staying out really late is make her get a summer job, that is one thing that kept me from staying out all hours, sleep was necessary to get up at 6:45 and be at work at 8:00 (til 5pm). My parents paid my tuition but I paid for all the supplies, books, etc., and I also worked 2 jobs at school. Sounds like she needs something to keep her busy and grow up some. If she does not shape up, pull the car privileges unless it is to go to work, and have her pay her own car insurance and cell phone, that may wise her up to life.
Sounds like when I got...sm
a Christmas card from a friend AFTER Christmas. I still don't know what was up with that.
BTW~ My friends threw me a surprise birthday brunch today for my 40th birthday and I have already started writing my thank you notes!
Sounds like her first kid and she has never
been around others to me.
Wow - that sounds so much like him (sm)
He left me alone after my c-section, he left me alone when I got devastating medical news, etc. Once I had a car accident a mile away and he would not come and help me after I called him all shaken up. When I mention these things he just accuses me of bringing up the past. But they are real examples of how I have been treated for years.
Sounds like me and my cat - (sm)
I went through something similar as you are going through with yours. I kept saying I'd know when it was time and really watching to make sure I wasn't being selfish. She went on about her business, albeit different from before, just made herself new routines, and did what she was able. When she couldn't jump on my lap anymore, I picked her up, and things like that. If she didn't like one can of food, I'd open another. This went on for months. I feel like I had the opportunity to let her have a good life, and show her how much I loved her, right up until the end - she decided when it was time. I know what you are feeling. Just love her and enjoy the time you have.
Thanks - really sounds like just what I need (nm)
x
Sounds to me like you have
approval addiction. I have it as well and know how you feel. If you don't do everything perfect for everybody you feel guilty. I suggest either reading or buying the audio of the book Approval Addiction by Joyce Meyers. It is wonderful!!
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