some parents need to be taught to....
Posted By: Teach Your Children Well. nm on 2009-06-19
In Reply to: so I yelled *shut up, mean mom!* - MissAnthrope
nm
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I was always taught the same sm
It is the thought that counts but I just could not justify that last Christmas.
My MIL (who I get along with great) collects a particular item (she has well over 100) and gives me and my SIL one every Christmas. At Thanksgiving I politely told her I just didn't have the room for anymore. I also told my SIL that if given the chance please tell her mother I don't want another one. She just laughed and said I don't think that is what she is going to get you. Even SIL agrees her mother's collection is way out of hand.
When I opened my gift from her it was of course this particular item I did not want. Her exact words were "I know you said you didn't want or need another one but I thought this one would be useful." I did thank her but I assure you it was not the most sincere thank you.
I think this year for Christmas I will give her a bottle of wine and say "I know you don't drink, but I do and this way when I visit I can have a glass." LOL!
I was taught
I was taught that a woman can be assertive, but it is rude to be aggressive. Guess shoes have different rules LOL
That's what we were always taught
We were told growing up that the use of foul language just showed how limited someone's vocabulary was. And I will say that most of the people I know well do NOT use the F word on a casual basis. For that matter, most of the people I know do not curse at all on the average day.
I always think it's bizarre that movies use so much gratuitous cursing, considering that is not how most people talk. At least that's what I thought.
And you were not taught manners
growing up - so rude.....Your post sounds like the wedding gift receipt I got which was also rude - the couple already had a thank you printed out- I took the time to get them 1 - they should have the decency to write a quick note- to have printed was not the way I was brought up.
So sorry I was taught as a child if given something
I should say thank you and accept, but then my mother taught me manners. If you do not like a gift you receive you can a) return or b) pass it on to someone who will. I give what I want to and if you don’t like, then do 1 of the above. Mind your manners. When I give something, I do not ask a person what they want and my gift comes because I want to give, not have to.
I was taught to be gracious
Regardless of the gift, you must always be gracious. They didn't need to give you anything at all and I was taught it was the thought that counts. What you do with it afterwards is up to you, but I have a few hideous gifts hanging around yet that I don't part with because of who gave them to me. A particularly creepy clown music box given to my kids comes to mind. It was given to them by an old lady who lived next door to us and I guess she thought it was nice. My kids are grown now but they said that thing always gave them the willies! LOL!
That's how I taught my kids.
Why would you call them anything different? I raised my children as to be intelligent human beings and never, ever used "baby talk" with them.
If you call them the right name from the beginning, the kids don't develop that "embarrassment" about using the right terms later on.
I just think this younger generation just needs to be taught! sm
I am a woman in my 30s. Got married almost 10 years ago. I lived up north for a long time and married a man from the "true" south. Okay. Here I go - and I may get flamed for this, but here I go...When I lived in NY, I NEVER saw a thank-you note or even saw anyone in my family write one. Never. So, I was never "taught" that you write thank-you notes due to my upbringing.
I think it is a cultural thing. Maybe it's even a socioeconmic thing. Yes, we were very poor growing up in NY. Both my parents made around 26,000 combined with 3 children.
Fast-forward. I move down here, meet this amazing guy with a large family - most have money - lots of it - we have a huge wedding - I receive more gifts than I could even count - met people at my wedding I've never seen before in my life - the southern generosity has been overwhelming, and still is. We go on our long honeymoon and when I get home, my MIL calls and says to me, "Mrs. so and so (from the wedding shower), still hasn't received your thank-you note. Maybe you just forgot to send hers out. In any case, just thought I'd let you know! EMBARASSING! So, I pulled out my thank-you cards that came with my wedding invites and began writing thank you notes. That is where the LOVE of writing thank-you notes and just-writing-to-say-hello notes began. I LOVE doing it now. Love it. My family up north and around the country are amazed.
Here again, I was TAUGHT by my new mother-in-law, so to speak, and she did it in a very tactful manner.
Writing notes is just an amazing ministry and I love to do it. I get them printed off and personalized now with either my initial or my full name. You can get them on ebay, they will print 20 of them for you with corresponding envelopes for around 10 bucks.
Anyways, this was my experience.
My grandpappy from Arkansas taught
me to make cornbread, not sweet, heat cast iron skillet with grease (to which corn meal has been sprinkled) til it smokes then pour in the batter, let the oil ooze up on top. It turns out crunchy crust. So good!! He used to eat it cold crumbled into a glass of buttermilk!
Spanking just taught my child it was okay to hit.
We never spanked our kid until he was around 2.5. Then dad got fed up with his behavior one day and spanked him. We also tried swatting him on the hand when he did something bad. Now my son has decided that hitting is what we do when we are mad and now hits me whenever he is upset. He never did this until he started receiving spankings. I really don't think spanking/switching is the answer and just sends the wrong message to the kids. But that is just my opinion and I realize everyone is entitled to raise their kids as they see fit.
I've been taught 'Herb' is the name, and
Jesus himself taught us not to judge others - let he who is without sin (sm)
cast the first stone. None of us has any right to say anything about how anyone else is living. We need to take care of the log in our own eye.... remember?
As an MT you have to be flexible and inventive, that's was I was taught!..nm
nm
I was taught to "always ignore the ignorant."
Unfortunately, I've run into people like that before, and I just ignore the comment, make nice chit-chat for a few minutes and "see you later alligator." At least, I demonstrated what my values are and did not degrade myself to their level. The main word here is "ignorant." There are so many people out there that are ignorant of their own manners, ignorant of other people's feelings, just tactless mules.
Grandpa from Tennessee taught me to cook it
x
Also, abstinence is taught regularly - kids'
We were always taught abstinence when I was in school. It was practically shoved down our throats, and I would estimate that only about 10% of the student population actually abstained. That is great for them, and they should be proud, but you can't leave the other 90% in the dark about safe sex, because they will be having it, and isn't better if they know all about the possible consequences of their actions and how to be as safe as possible? That's just my view of it. Safety first!
No outside contact & children and women taught
nm
Of course I would want to be equally valued. Why can't that be taught at home? nm
x
I find it very offensive that is how you taught your daughter to vote
if my other post is deleted, just thought id add some more.
Not only is it ridiculous that you told your daughter to vote that way, it is ignorant and racist and REALLY SAD
but you just admitted what this election came down to RACE
NOT POLICIES, NOT WHO IS THE BEST FOR THE JOB.
RACE. Exactly what President Elect didn't want it to be about.
how sad are you telling your mixed baby to vote more black than white, when Obama himself is black and white.
sickening and you should be ashamed, how can you live with yourself knowing that you didn't back your vote on intelligence but skin color instead? you just took us back 40 years and admitted it.
there are PLENTY of black republicans, Condeelza Rice, JC Watts, Michael Steele ETC ETC
and this guy my favorite
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wV1mRvxAyHM
AND
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KxhYampIl7A&feature=related
Emeril Legasse taught me about hard-boiled eggs
Emeril says to put the eggs in the pot with the cold water, and wait for it to boil, when it's a rolling boil, shut off the stove, and cover the pot for 13 minutes - and voila!! Perfect hard-boiled eggs!!
*S*
How do you feel about toddlers being taught to call their private parts
a v*gina and a peni$ ? Just wondering
Yes, my dad's parents
My dad died when I was 18. I love my daddy, and I love my pop (step-dad). It is so sad that my children never got to meet their grandpa, but they do also have a grandpa (my pop) that loves them with all his heart. I also have a brother, who was named after my dad, and felt it only right that if anyone uses my dad's name it be his choice, not mine. Does that make sense? Thanks for your input!!!
My parents did it,
and they would say DON'T get Sears to do it. They did a horrible job.
My parents have several sm
and are very happy. I don't know how my dad went about aquiring them (he does have his real estate license)so that is probably a plus even though that is not his regular job. My parents are able to spend 3 weeks straight in Florida each year due to time shares. Two weeks at one place and one week at another. He also will swap time shares with others so they don't always have to go to the same places every year. My husband and I looked into one at Hilton Head and it just didn't seem like a very good deal to us. I didn't talk to my father first, but felt sure he would have advised against this one. This is just from my experience. I have heard horror stories from others. Good Luck.
What about your parents
Treat them as if they were your parents. Most of the time when I was married and we went to my in-laws, we knocked but then walked in especially if it was through the garage. I did the same at my parents, went through the sliding glass door. They did the same at our house. To me is is a minor thing and I did not care, thought it was great that they liked me and felt welcome enough to come on over and drop by. If they ended up seeing something they shouldn't then perhaps next time they would have called. Or if someone was there that they did not plan on seeing whatever. Sometimes we had the best last minute pot luck and card games that way. But that is me.
My parents are the same way. They don't like to
"invite" themselves along to the in-laws' houses on holidays, and won't even accept direct invitations from the in-laws because they think I pressured the invitation. My in-laws (and I) always figure "the more, the merrier!" When I host here, I invite all of my in-laws' extended families, but they don't want to come either. So we all wind up doing the two dinner thing and trying to schedule around EVERYONE. It's annoying. I'd rather rent a big hall and have EVERYONE show up for potluck. But nobody wants to leave their houses. Always some excuse, like young kids, but they didn't mind making me haul my young kids all over the state. And I'm the one in the family with the most kids. I say go anyway to the in-laws. Your parents can stay at your house alone for the evening, or they can come with you. It's their choice, but your plans are already made.
27 and 31 here, in the NE. Many other parents we
s
it's not just the parents...
kids today have different issues to face than kids did even up to the 50s and 60s. Most kids are watching MTV before they are out of diapers. It's just easier to put something electronic in a kid's hand than have to act like a parent. Kids are having kids at earlier ages than ever. A few years ago I lived in south Philly and watched a girl about 12 yo with a baby talking to a young boy on a bicycle. She told him she wanted money for the baby and he told her his mom didn't give him any lunch money that week, so he didn't have anything to give her.
My situation has been different because of the abandonment issues my GD has had to adjust to... but get this. One reason I can not spank her is because she came to me with some violent behavior from her parents. Her mom would let her run across the room (to the mom), jump on her and wrestle until she was so over stimulated the baby would bite mom on the face...and mom just laughed. I could not spank her for biting me...one violent action did not change the first. I have had to learn many new techniques since I raised my kids...obviously spaking did not work on them! I was very firm with them and used spanking as a last resort, but I can't do that with this child. She has to trust me and spankings do not build trust. We have a great relationship now, but I constantly have to reinforce changing her behavior from what she had when she came to me, along with just asserting her own indpendence as she grows older, with my words and deeds, not with violence.
My parents used to do this...
I can remember begging my mom for the list of names and numbers and she'd never give in. Drove us 4 kids up the wall! But thinking back, it was fun! Merry Christmas y'all!!!
Where are the parents???
I don't put the blame totally on Brittany (most of it I do, but not all of it). Her parents should be hauled down with her. Where in the world were they when this all was beginning. If it was me my mom and dad would be right there beside me saying what in the world is going on and they would get me the counseling I needed (and not allow me to leave when I wanted to). I don't care if she is a "pop" star or not. If more of the parents of these "stars" would act like parents you would think their children would behave more rationally. I look at Brittany and lots of her friends and they really are still children. I have a brother-in-law who is 48 and acts like he's 16 and needs to be kept in line by his mom. Maybe the parents are too worried that their famous kids will stop giving them money....who knows. Maybe not, but it looks like it to me.
parents
I had a daughter in a similar situation. Her school had a tutoring program after schools with actual teachers and that really helped her a lot. She actually was doing okay in the class, but just didn't feel confident. The teachers made her feel more sure of herself and that seemed to make all the difference. I'd talk with the physics teacher or counselor to see if they can work with her before she drops the class.
Parents what would you do?
I'm looking for some advice. My daughter just started the 9th grade. She's been in accellerated/Honors classes for a few years and she has always maintained a 98+ average. This year she's taking Physics, a 12th grade class. She's only been back to school for less than two weeks and she's so stressed out. She wants to drop out of the class already. I told her to give it to the first semester which will be over in ten weeks to see how it goes. My husband feels that she has to take it eventually so she should say in the class. She's afraid that this course is going to ruin her grade point average that she's very proud of. I think she should talk to the teacher and her counselor to see what advice they have. Her teacher is one that gives the work and says do it without really teaching them how to do anything. I'm so illiterate when it comes to science I'm no help at all. My husband took physics years ago and he tried to work with her last night, but I'm not sure how much he remembers himself. What would you do if your child was in the same predicament?
parents
careful, your face will freeze that way. go to your room and wait. killer was "I never thought I could be so disappointed in you. I thought we raised you better than that".
parents
how could I forget this one? Can't never accomplished anything.
never make fun of what someone does for a living as long as it is an honest job.
parents
My parents helped very little - they were very loving, but very poor. I worked, had no car, ate very simple cheap foods - that is the only way I could have done it. . I could not help my daughter much either - she got scholarships, took out loans and worked - full time one year while attending college full-time. . If parents can help, I think they should. . I think this mom is willing to help, just not change her entire life, which she should not have to.
This all comes down to the parents
I think those women are making a big mistake. I love my sister and nephew, don't get me wrong. But he is like that 7 yo and it drives me crazy. BUT my sister and BIL are to blame, I feel. He gets a toy every time they're in a store. He gets a new toy if he's good at the dentist. My sister feels "guilty" if he likes something and she doesn't run out and get it. They buy him major video games just because, instead of reserving these things for birthdays or Christmas. They will go out and buy him a $200 item in the middle of the week and when I ask what the occasion is? Nothing, we just thought he'd like it!
He is well behaved and they don't use the toys as bribes, but yet still, it's unbelievable some of the stuff they do. Yes, it's their only child, but I'm amazed. Growing up when we would talk, my sister had definite opinions about what she would and would not do when she had children, and this is not how she felt back then.
But he doesn't know anything about Monopoly or playing cards, or any of that stuff. In my opinion, they're raising him to be materialistic and as an adult I can see him as one of those guys who always has to have the latest toys to impress the other guys. Just my opinion.
You might be right, but my parents had me so...
afraid of them that I would NEVER have considered such a thing. Although I do not have a teenager yet, my hope is to have that kind of fear and, yes, respect by the time they are that age. However, I might live to eat my words yet. I just think that with a teenage girl, this might not really have been about a wedding after all--it could have been about a date to a wedding and I find that scary.
See what I mean? Some parents have no
consideration for anyone but themselves. Yes, parenting is a tough job. Some people do it better than others. But it doesn't give the less-than-adequate parents the right to inflict their out-of-control brats on others.
I love how they all go on the defensive, too, if you call them out on it. Suddenly they accuse the person objecting to their kids of not having kids themselves. (Usually not true).
It all boils down to consideration. And letting your infant scream through 3/4 of a movie, or a wedding ceremony, is pretty much akin to looking the other way while your dog drops a load of steaming poop on a neighbor's front lawn.
I would believe most parents would know
already.
You could do what my parents did to me
I stayed past curfew one too many times. First time they let it slide, second time the warned me and third time said I disobeyed, so they marched into my room, grabbed a suitcase and said if I didn't want to obey their rules than to get out and see if I could live somewhere cheaper and have a car whenever I wanted it. Even though the car was mine (old Valiant (think Chrysler made it, but it was mine), but they told me the car was not an option and would not be going with me.
It took me about 30 minutes of begging and pleading for them to let me to stay and I had to do some extra work around the house as punishment for disobeying them.
The only thing was back then 18 was legal age (drinking, etc). Your daughter is not of legal age yet. I'm not saying this is your or your daughter because I don't know you, but parents seem to always believe their kids are responsible. My sister thinks her 19-year-old son is responsible, but he shows time and time again he is not. I have a friend who boasted about how responsible her 17-year-old son is, he doesn't smoke or drink and studies in school and gets good grades and only goes out to go to the library. A few days later (Sat night) the police had brought him home as he was caught at a party drinking.
Took a lot of time for my parents to consider me responsible after some of the stuff I did (staying out past curfew, etc). Parents should not be so quick to trust their kids. They need to earn trust.
Where are parents?
Are the parents going to be home that allow this? In Connecticut if there was underage drinking and something went wrong the parents would be in trouble as much as the rest of the kids. Just in one month we lost 5 teenagers in 3 different accidents for drinking and loosing control of their cars and running them up a pole. A parents worse nightmare.
I never had a problem with my two daughters with drinking underage at home. When they are at college I do not loose any sleep over it because what I don't see or know I cannot worry about it. I trust they will make the right decisions but they are away so who knows.
My parents.
x
Any foster parents out there?
x
You're asking what I and other parents were asking...sm
when the other teacher was out so long. Our school system is probably the worst about holding back kids. I'm a foster parent and had a prior foster child that desperately needed to be held back (she was academically 2 years behind her peers and emotionally 2 years behind them) and they refused to hold her back because she had already been held back in the 1st grade due to poor attendance while she was with her birth parents, regardless of the fact that she was emotionally and educationally behind the kids her age.
They were all good parents as far as I know - sm
There were no reports in the news stating any reason why this group from Kansas thought they were bad parents. They were just parents with broken hearts. I agree with you that they need to be kept away from funerals.
Any parents here making a
to only have one child..? We're seriously considering not having any more..One is PLENTY OF WORK AND LOVE!!
If possible, their parents should be told..
that their boys are insulting and ridiculing adult women on the street. Having raised 3 sons, they were encouraged to be kids and have fun but they were CERTAINLY taught respect for adults and that it's wrong to insult anybody ''for fun'' (particularly adults). Unbelievable that the poster below called this ''minute''. There is nothing ''minute'' about ridicule and nasty remarks--particularly directed at a perfect stranger just going about her own business!
Yea, they might but the parents not as enthused
as when their children were little and I do not think it has that much to do with independence, I think the baby and toddler thing just hyped too much. I for one really disappointed in my children and nothing to do with if they are on their own or not.
Parents, what are you thinking about?
I have read today more about the little girl who was kidnapped in Portugal. I have no idea what her parents were thinking about norr for that reason, what a lot of parents are thinking about now. You cannot leave your children to go dine, even for 5 minutes, no matter how closeby you think you are. You cannot let your children run around in the stores unattended while you shop or leave them in the toy section to keep them occupied. You cannot leave them in the bathtub while you go to answer the phone or the door. It only takes a second for a child to drown. Don’t leave them in the vehicle while you run in the store or pump your gas leaving your vehicle running or the keys inside. There are all kinds of stories about the children kidnapped here just for those reasons. I do not care what section of the country you live in, don’t leave your doors open, be it daytime or night. You think you are safe. It only takes a few minutes for someone to swoop down and grab a child. The parents of this child in Portugal are 100% to blame for their child being kidnapped. They could have taken their children with them that evening or the resort where they were staying offered babysitting and yet the family opted not to have this. I hope for the best in her recovery. It was supposed to have been a family vacation so take the kids with you, be it a late evening dinner or the like. What a shame!
NO WAY. It is not your place to tell them, let their parents tell them when they
think the time is right!!!!!
How many parents here are afraid to
let their kids play outside because of the numerous kidnappers and pedophiles wandering around your neighborhoods.
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