so then the kids you had didn't grow up
Posted By: raising my granddaughter on 2007-12-31
In Reply to: blah, blah blah... - MslaMT
in you care...they went back to who? Family? Wow, the odds of every single child you cared for going back to their parents/family is well, just remarkable or what a coincidence for the sake of these posts. NONE of them were split up? You never claimed to be an angel, but you must be one heck of a FC parent to have lucked out like that considering the politics and social issues involved. I never said having siblings in short-term FC is unacceptable, just harder to come by anymore than it used to be...and the states now have federal laws to follow that were not in place 10 years ago.
I will restate that sending siblings to a GROUP HOME (read: Not a FC setting) is less desirable than several relatives maintaining close contact in short-term situations.
Yea, Budda likes it when I write about something I'm passionate about.
Complete Discussion Below:  marks the location of current message within thread
The messages you are viewing
are archived/old.
To view latest messages and participate in discussions, select
the boards given in left menu
Other related messages found in our database
Didn't she grow up in New York City?
What does she know about the South?
It didn't work out due to combining of kids and step kids. nm
*
my kids didn't listen either
until I gave them a set time such as you have to take you bath and have your teeth brushed by 8:00 and if it wasn't done they lost a privilage. After a couple of times they saw I was serious and the problem stopped.
Maybe they had so many kids they didn't realize til now he was gone
What is wrong with people. You have a missing kid you report it!
Reminds me of that movie Home alone.
that is "why didn't dad take both kids"....tired already - nm
ss
I didn't disable mine, but the kids pay
for texting or it gets turned off the next month. They get 1500 texts a month on my plan.
Justice of the peace for us (we didn't even tell kids till it was over) sm
Just the way we wanted it - no muss, no fuss - 
We didn't even spend half that amount on each of our kids.
Of course, our kids told us about their spoiled rotten friends who all got electric guitars, multiple gaming systems, flat panel TVs for their bedrooms, cell phones, mp3 players, etc. Then the little boy from across the street came over and told me what he got for Christmas, which wasn't much at all. I felt so bad for the little guy. If I had known they didn't have much, I would have bought for his family instead of my 25+ family and friends who don't even need anything. I refuse to buy into it all for my own kids. If they want all the electronics, they can work and save up for it, and then only with my permission. No unlimited Internet, no texting, no M, R or T rated movies and games. I just don't believe children need all that junk. DH and I grew up just fine without it.
No where either. My mother didn't raise any foolish kids. LOL nm
nm
grow up
Yes, did grow up in NYC but
from the way she spoke, you would have thought she was born and raised here.
Oh, grow UP, Jan! sm
They grow up ................sm
when we are not looking, whether we like it or not. While I don't think 10-yo boys should be coddled to the point of being sissies, I do still believe they are still children and need to be guided in an age-appropriate way. The ripe old age of 10 is a difficult time for most kids. They realize they have added a digit to their age and they are entering an emotionally scary and hormonally charged time in their lives when everything they knew is changing....their bodies, their relationships, their whole world. Our jobs as parents are to guide them, not drag them kicking and screaming, along the path that will eventually lead to adulthood. If we do our jobs properly, then we will have young men and women of honor who will someday do the same for their children, but if we screw it up, heaven help the next generation.
I think you both need to grow up! sm
With all the horrible things going on in the world, this kind of stuff sounds absolutely petty to me for two grown adults to end a relationship over. You both sound like spoiled brats to me.
Let them grow up
even if they rant and rave. What would they do if you were dead? That's what I used to tell my 3 grown children and my daughter has worked 2 jobs to raise her son single-handed. Our children would NEVER move back in with us for any reason. You have to cut the strings. Sometimes it hurts but everyone is better off in the long run.
Maybe if you wanted it to grow sm
I'll fight Hayseed over it any day. LOL.
I never ever wanna grow up
ll
Did you grow up in 1 town or move...sm
and if you moved, how often and are you glad you moved? As for me, we moved every other year due to my father's occupation. There were 2 places I was very glad that we moved from and 2 places I would have loved to have stayed, the others were OK. When people ask me where I was raised I tell them "everywhere" because that best summarizes it.
What about you? Do you have a home town?
:) I feel that way, too. Cranberries don't grow down here!
To me, true dressing has only cornbread in it, too. No white bread. :)
I know, but backbones don't grow overnight.
I also realize that I 'lived' before my kids came into this word.
And I know I made bad decisions that turned me into a single mom.
I'm not saying I hate my life. I'm just tired. I probably wouldn't know how to live at this point anyhow.
You are 100% right and I'm not making excuses, but it didn't get like this overnight and it won't change overnight.
I say, 'Let it grow!' And under no circumstances -
should you (or anyone else) grow old 'gracefully'. Fight it every inch of the way. If the 'cats' are making remarks about your hair, it's probably because they're jealous.
I'm 58, and like yours, mine is still mostly light brown, and I occasionally highlight it, too, but only when I feel like it. I had it cut shoulder-length a few years ago and hated it -- they ironed it straight and turned in under, and made me look like every soccer mom in my neighborhood, which I am totally NOT. Some people make good short-hair people, and some people don't. And I'm one of 'em.
I have a friend a little younger than me, and her hair is waist-length, VERY thick and beautiful, and salt-and-pepper, with a lot more salt than pepper. I've gone back to growing mine out, and now have a long ponytail. It should hit waist-length in the next year or so, and that's right where I want it. I'll probably still have a long ponytail when I'm 80, too. And if I don't like the gray hairs, then maybe I'll dye them purple.
So let the catty neighbors all walk around looking like dowdy old clones, and in the meantime you'll be happy being your normal, beautiful-haired self.
I know I will miss them terribly when they grow up - but sm
somehow I don't think that's the part I'll miss ;-)
I think I'll miss them needing me to help with things, miss tucking them in at night, watching them learn. I don't think I'll miss having to fuss at them - but you never know...lol
Do boys go through hormonal changes as they grow up? sm
I have two boys, one is 6 and the other will be 10 in a few weeks. my almost 10 y/o has been such a good kid through his life. BUT i notice sometimes when he stays with my inlaws, especially my 11 y/o nephew, he comes back home with an attitude. my two boys usually get a long really well. but my 10 y/o spent three nights with my inlaws (two included my nephew) and he has been so cranky with me and his little brother. i didn't know of boys have hormonal changes like girls do.
She won't grow to fit her tank, she will just keep growing....
But eventually she has to stop growing some time. I really think she has probably grown as much as she is going to. If she has to go to a bigger tank yet, we may have to see if our local zoo will take her. The tanks are the biggest outlay. I get all her rocks free from our local monument maker and a quarry. I buy a bottle of the stuff to kill the chlorine and use our city water.
Cleaning her tank is not too bad as we have a gravel vacuum. We don't fill the tank all the way up, only about 2/3 full. They need at least the width of their shell for the depth of the water in case they flip over on their back. Otherwise they can't flip themselves over. We do a partial tank change. Just enough to suck up the "poop" and food scraps. Then we replace it.
Other than her lights burning out once in a while, she is pretty low mainatenance. And fun to watch. Especially when she chases the goldfish. LOL
Tomatoes are not hard to grow........sm
You can start the plants inside and plant them in large containers on the patio or porch if that is the only space you have. Nothing much better than a big, fresh, juicy ripe garden tomato!!
It would grow old real fast for me - sm
so I can understand you being annoyed, and no it is not heartless. Is he short on cash? Can he afford to feed himself? Obviously is money is an issue then it is a different story. Were you very close before the divorce or is this new behavior? I presume the GF does not want him there for dinner presuming it is a loneliness issue for him. But as you said he is probably keeping an eye on your mom since he asks about her every day, I would presume the divorce was her idea? Or is he having buyers remorse? I would set some ground rules for dad and tell him as much as you enjoy seeing him, etc, that you need some nights to yourself, and to limit it to maybe 3 days a week, MWF or something like that. So he still gets to see you (and stalk your mom) but not monopolize every evening. Or else starting making things you know your dad dislikes!
WHAT? Children who kill animals grow up
to kill people, they are sociopoaths and have no conscious. I would lock them away for life.
Oh my. You sound so young. You'll grow up one day. nm
***
Do they ever grow out of this?? My once precious and sweet 3 year old son has sm
turned into a holy terror. Wow. For the past 2 weeks he has been completely nonsensical and out of control. Any little thing throws him off and he begins destroying the house, kicking, yelling, screaming, etc. This morning I woke up to him crying on the couch without any clothes on, so I told him to go put something on (it's freezing in here!), to which he told me NO! Of course he received a spanking for that (what a way to wake up, huh?). Well, he's been pitching a fit for almost 2 hours now since I refused to cook him pancakes. I told him if he would behave I would make them. Well, he doesn't want to do anything but scream and throw fits, so I won't make them. He has said the word pancake at least 200 times since early this morning. I cannot reward bad behavior, so now I'm just ignoring him which is what my pediatrician told me to do the other day. If I deal with him, I may regret it later. Yes, can you tell I am completely frustruated?
I know they say different things work for different children, but NOTHING works with him. I never, ever spanked before. But the chair became a joke as he would just jump right back down out of his chair and run out the room screaming. He refused to sit down. So then I had to begin spanking him and of course that just makes him angrier, meaner, and he won't listen to a word I say. As soon as I begin talking to him and explaining what I am doing he screams to "override" my voice.
I cried all day Sat. because my husband took my older soon to a ball game and my 3 year old was really bad that morning. I just wanted a little peace, but he refused. So we battled all morning until lunch. It has been every single day like this. Yesterday was bad, but not too bad. Today is really bad, but not as bad as Saturday. I wonder what is going on? He is so unreasonable. The thing is, my husband says, "he's 3. How can you not handle a 3 year old?" Like just now, as I'm typing this, he just said to me, "mommy's STUPID!!" I haven't heard that one all morning, so let me go take care of it. Please say a prayer for me...and him too.
every time you stretch, you grow an inch. NM
/
Thank you! I didn't realize they made computer glasses. Will make an appt. Spit didn't wor
3
Sounds like a great way to grow a nice new head
of hair. I'm sure she'll come up with something to give her a fresh start. She could always wear a wig. I'm sure the hair extensions did some damage to her lovely locks. 
I decided to grow tomatoes for my 10 year old who loves them! sm
I planted 2 plants and they grew up so tall - totally pesticide free with no bugs on them all year! We had so many that I would give them to a neighbor. One batch was picked up by a woman who drove 30 miles for our tomatoes! I don't like them.....They were no big deal planting - just put them in the ground and watered every day.
LOL! I was told it made your hair shiny and grow faster!
nm
You can grow tomato plants upside down from hanging pots, too.
s
Buy a bike, grow a garden, get rid of cable, take a second part time job
..
I feel so lucky to grow up in the ྂs-80s. Ditto all thoughts.nm
nm
I didn't say her decor didn't sound great.
It's not ridiculous.
I would seriously doubt the Christianity of anyone who feels it is okay to celebrate Halloween. It is anti-God in every aspect.
You can only service 1 God and the folly of man and carnality is in direct conflict with holiness.
Thanks - I didn't realize they didn't like the smell of citrus
I have the feeling he doesnt have a UTI and he's trying to tell me something else, but I'll be taking him to the vets to be safe.
I didn't phrase that well. I didn't mean to SM
offend. I think I said that to other lady below!
I wouldn't want to be told that myself. I guess you sounded down. Again, if I offended anyone, I'm sorry.
I'm a channel surfer. Last night watched PBS documentary on Kennedy assasination, then PBS show on Dick Cheney. Yuck. Then watched show on stem cell research to cure paralysis. There were two young woman, both with paralysis, who were so inspiring. Watched another segment on Current about blind people using their voices to "see". That had to be seen to be believed. Anyway, positives offset the negative.
Again, sorry if I said anything out of line.
Nope, no kids with him, all of our kids are 20 and over.
I would think that some of the $12,000 A YEAR he paid in support for over 9 years should have been enough to save some for college. He paid his dues so to speak, always paid the support on time, had insurance for them, etc. He told them straight up to pay for their own college. Is there something wrong with that?
ESL kids have a label =$$$. When the illiterate kids get a label slapped on them - they will get a
Most public schools do not teach children to read with intensive phonics. It has nothing to do with class size IMHO. The method of reading instruction is what determines if the kids will learn to read or not.
Consider homeschooling her.
Each child represents a $ amount to public school administration. As long as the child attends they get their $. They still get X amount of $ for each year they teach or do not teach a kid to read.
Their compensation is not reduced when they produce illiterate adults.
I didn't say she should sue them. I said that
her sister legally is obligated to pay for it. Me, I would have probably told her I was unhappy with her, learned my lesson and would have moved on.
If I was the sister though, I would have admitted my fault, at least partial fault, and made amends.
Yep, I didn't know that either. Thanks. :) NM
NM
I really didn't know all of this.
thanks
She didn't come with us.
NM
It must be because I didn't owe very much
I had my husband take extra out of his check every year and most of the time it's enough to cover mine too. Last year I owed under $100 as I made more than I planned. I am an IC and use my SS#. I don't remember how much you have to owe for the fine/quarterly taxes either, like Patti stated.
well thank you! I didn't know being in --sm
the 50 year age bracket was young, but I appreciate the comment! Maybe in 20 years I will be able to retire.
I can't believe the mom didn't take him to the ER...
Wow.
No, I didn't know that...but (sm)
I don't have Soapnet...so! But thanks for the update...
Do you know for SURE he didn't
make an effort to see you all these years?
My friend of 30+ was told by HER mother that her father was dead. Come to find out when she is her 20's he's not only alive and well, he's happy to meet her.
It's always a good thing to take what ANYone tells you with a large grain of salt.
As to how to approach him? I would find out where he works and send a letter there - that way it can't be intercepted by his wife. Alternatively, you could call him on the phone, but that option does not allow him time to absorb the news he's been "found" by you.
Provide all your contact information and ask him to at least meet/talk to you once. I would be very surprised if he does not grant your request.
|
