positive things

• Your Positive Event of the Day - ?
  • Had an incredible day - LinK
  • DH is taking me gambling tonight...can't wait! - mtme
  • My best friend emailed me and said she's - coming out to SF today, for the whole weekend!
    • PS: (Im the one who posted below that she's - the nicest person I know.) So what a -see msg
  • 2 things - Kaydie
  • The best thing that happened to me today? - Best things in life are free
  • positive things - sunnyMT

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and hope that it dissipates.  Big hope, I know.  I don't want to go through that again, either, only this time I will stay and hope for the best but be prepared for the worst. 

Let me start by saying I can't believe how low some people will stoop.  Just when I think I have heard just about everything, something else comes up.

My neighbor is the sweetest lady you could ever meet.  The whole family is very nice and very giving. I have known them since I was very little and she used to babysit me and my sibs.

Three years ago, her daughter was a junior in high school and ended up pregnant by one of the "jocks."   They dated for over a year but as soon as she ended up pregnant, he would have nothing to do with her (typical huh?.)  I might also add that while his family is fairly well off, her family is not as fortunate but they are comfortable.  The daughter decided to keep the baby and raise him with the help of her family since she was not getting help from the father of her little boy.  I have kept him on occasion too and I just love this little guy. 

Stacy finished high school and struggled to get her nursing degree, making a nice living for herself and Michael. 

Last April, Stacy's dad passed away suddenly and now that everything is settled, she and her mother have come into some insurance money.  Not a gigantic sum of money but nothing to sneeze at.  Let's say its a couple hundred thousand.

After almost 4 years of nothing from Michael's father or his family, he's come back around again.  Of course, he has heard there is some money now!   Apparently daddy has cut him off for some recent bad behavior and I won't say what that was.   Not only that, his mommy now calls Stacy all the time wanting to see her "grand baby."   Oh BARF!   Give me a break!  Michael will be FOUR very very soon and NOW they want to see him?

Something really stinks.  

Please send Stacy positive thoughts.  I don't think she will give him (dad) the time of day, nor grandma either since she encouraged him leaving her behind but, you never know.  

He really broke her heart when he just started pretending he never even knew her.  He doesn't deserve her or Michael.

What sayings do you remember your parents telling you?

Do unto others as you would have them do onto you.

you guys don't know how much you actually helped ole MTME4vr (that's me) thru some very dark days. 

It did get kind of strange and intense with all the crazy anecdotes and side stories during the guessing games.  Call me weird, I miss it terribly!!  HAA! HAA! 

Then everybody ended up either sick or injured, that was a rough spell!  

Hey do you remember the story about one of the gang, think it might have been MTSara, went to the door and her neighbors were out in the yard arguing in their underwear??  ZOIKS!! 

How long before they can straighten up and test negative?  Does this mean for the rest of their lives, they will never receive any welfare benefits becase they smoked a joint? 

Would I the taxpayer have to pay for the drug testing that is performed this one time or multiple times?  Would I have to pay more taxes when people are homeless?  Would we need more homeless shelters?  What would this cost the taxpayers in the long haul?  Is every applicant tested?  Where is this information for the results of the drug testing stored, in a police database?  What type of rehab if the test is positive would be offered, if any?  Would the person serve time for being under the influence?  Would this cause me to have to serve jury duty more often?  Would they also be screened for alcohol?  What type of future ramifications are in order if and when they do get a job?  Would the prospective employer be notified that welfare was not granted due to drug use/intoxication? 

Not an easy task is it?

http://www.wdsu.com/video/18244963/index.html

http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/us/2008/12/10/dnt.dog.saves.family.kwtv

Things other people fear that I do not include snakes (awwww, they so cute! they look like they're smiling!), rats, gangbangers (except Mara Salvatrucha, move them up to my "scary" list), poverty, death, traveling at high rates of speed with almost anyone sober, bats (CUTE!!!!!), homeless people, Sasquatch, most of my male friends, bears, mountain lions. 

Fear is such an odd thing, don't you think? So much of it is relative to our own experiences in life, yet at the same time some of them are downright irrational. 

So, how 'bout you? What will send  you running screaming in the other direction, and what things can you take care of when someone else goes running screaming in the other direction?

I went through a similar situation with my (now ex-) husband's family during the ten years we were married.

Your husband is NOT the problem, his parents are. You said that your husband tried (albeit unsuccessfully) to get along with his father. So, it seems to me that he *DID* try as best as he could. But, sometimes, no matter how hard you try, things don't work out. So you do what the song says, "You have to know when to hold up; know when to fold up ..."

Now, it seems to me that his parents are treating your children like "holiday turkeys," ... bring them to be brought to the table once or twice a year, but ignore them the rest of the year. Yes, that's pretty much what it sounds like, and my heart goes out to your children 'cause I know the pain they are suffering ... because of their grandparents.

I also suspect that the ONLY reason your husband's parents went to the event was to "stick it" to your husband, and not because of the grandchildren. When you love someone and are truly proud of them, you do everything you can to be part of their life.

The ONLY people who matter in all of this are your immediate family ... You, your husband, and your children. Do not let his parents tear you all apart. I think you all need to get into therapy (you, your husband, and the children), so you can work through this problem AS A FAMILY UNIT, 'cause you're the only family that truly matters. You're all in pain and all of your feelings need to be counted, by each other.

Take it from someone who lived it. 

Your writing my store.  I too went to court over 20 times due to custody battle with a dud.  After 4 years of being dragged in and out of court, I ended up the what I had before I started $100 a week.  I did get sole custody of my son though.  I spent probably about $20,000 on lawyers (4 of them).   I wrote a credit check for $5000 to hold is escrow because I had to sell my house and was planning on paying it after the sale of my house.  Well, the lawyer cashed my check and ended up in jail after he ripped off about $75,000 from clients.  I was out $5000.  

I also had a warrant out for my arrest becuse my ex took a notice I had to go to court out of my mail box.  Being that he was good friends with the neighbors from h&#%, I did get arrested and put in jail for about 4 hours which cost me another $250 for the bail. 

Keep your head up.  It will get better.  I haven't gone to court since 8/05 because both judges, the one in family court and the one in municipal court both told my ex to leave me alone.    Everytime I get the mail I'm expecting to get a notice to go to court.   Believe it or not, it wasn't so bad being in jail, a cell to myself, and away from the h$&% he put me through. 

So here I am, had to sell my house, broke as anything, living in a condo, but my kid is all mine. The ex moved 2 minutes away from me "to keep an eye on me" but what goes around comes around and I'm just waiting for the day he gets what he deserves.  My son refuses to go to his house because his girlfriend also took me to court a few times.  He is supposed to pick him up on Saturday morning and bring him home Sunday night every weekend.  So guess who has to give the kid money for the weekend - me.   That comes out of the $100 a week along with lunch money, clothing, food, etc.   I literally ended up having a nervous breakdown, 6 days in the looney bin. 

Keep your head up, I know exactly what you're going through and somehow it does get better.  ');>

Hayseed said, "No more breads, pastas, rice, or taters....all the things we really loved." That could be part of my problem. We've been eating a lot of pasta, rice and taters because hubby can't have dark greens, which includes salads, green beans, etc. because of gout and on Coumadin for AVR.  Don't know what else to make anymore.

We gave up coffee, now, too, because both of us were having stomach problems with it. Two cups a day was our limit. He can survive with it, I can't seem to do that. LOL

Dinosaur said, " I had undiagnosed diabetes and would just "poop" out when my blood sugar was too low (or even too high!)."  Diabetes runs in my family and I've been watching my counts for the past 10 years. So far, so good. I don't eat sugary stuff like pies,cakes, candy, soda. Don't like sweets that much.

I was checked for Lyme disease a couple years ago because I had 2 tick bites. That was negative.

The only allergy I have is my home. Ever since we moved to this house, I've had the flu, colds, runny nose, sneezing, coughing, etc.

Guess I'll have to make an appointment with a doctor and try to find out. Usually I'm one of those people who has something wrong that no one can figure it out. When I was 40, I had mono (rare for my age group) and was told I was "borderline Epstein-Barr and Guillame-Barre [sic]."

 I was also checked for B12 deficiency (borderline), Anemia (borderline), rheumatoid arthritis, etc. You name it, I had the test over a 2 year period. The answer? Nada. I'm beginning to think all these "borderline" tests are coming back to bite me.

Thanks for your help. I think I will make an appointment to get checked out again.

1.  Your house payment probably also has your taxes and insurance added in.  If paid off, you'll still have to pay these.  Mine account for about 1/2 of my total house payment.  Plus, 6% is low compared to the other interest rates.  

2.  Debt to credit ratio:  I've had all of my credit cards increase their rates to "default" rates just because my debt was a high percentage of all my credit (no missed payments, no late pays, etc.)  This will affect the teaser rates as well. 

3.  Your 401k is also probably earning some type of interest.  Take that "lost" interest from money you've borrowed into account.  That will help you better compare the interest rates. 

If you feel you have to talk to a debt counselor, there is no shame in that!  Just make sure it's a reputable company.  As with most things, there are a lot of scams out there.  Good Luck!