not to mention totally insensitive to his CHILDREN!!!
Posted By: Sydney and Justin Simpson......sm on 2006-11-23
In Reply to: No - I did not watch the trial - Mimi
to have published this while raising his children at home - really REEKS!...........but then he's become a real no-role-model.......
Heisman Trophy winner? That was decades ago.....*lol*
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I should mention that I am 42, have 2 children and done with having children. nm
nm
I know, you always get those insensitive jerks SM
who just see your pain as an opportunity to make you feel worse. Can you imagine how miserable those people must be if they get on off on our misery? 
You've got to be joking - you are so insensitive
I read this post and couldn't believe it. She asked for positive feedback and you tell her this? What kind of a person are you? Sheesh. Her husband certainly does not sound like he has a lot of good qualities. To write a letter to your wife pointing out all the flaws. And then you tell her she is spoiled and unthankful???? With friends like you who needs enemies. “Ms. Done” sounds like she needs encouragement and reinforcement and some love and self esteem. Nobody should listen to your words. I don’t know who is worse you or her husband.
To Done: My situation is not as bad as yours but I’ve had my moments. Luckily I don’t have children, so I don’t have to face the situation and struggles that you do. I have been married for 25 years. My husband doesn’t beat me. We laugh a lot, but sometimes I can’t put it into words but sometimes I too feel like I’m no longer in love with him (not all the time, just moments here and there). Other days I just go through the motions of breathing, working, and daily routine stuff. People who don’t know you or your situation will just tell you in an instant to leave but its not that easy and they are not standing in your shoes. Years ago mine told me I was dumpy and acting like an old lady (I was 43 at the time). He told me that when I sit and do cross stitch I look like an old lady. He tells me in an instant if I'm doing something wrong. Once time I said something to him and he came back with “you must have been a mean kid growing up saying hurtful things. I’ll bet you didn’t have many friends”. Talk about being taken aback I was too shocked to even think of a response to say. For the most part we laugh a lot, but there are days that I wonder why in the world I hastened into marriage and believe that I have done something horrible thing in a previous life and this is karma. But that’s just my struggles I will deal with.
On another note, I am a child of an unhappy marriage. I won’t put blame on either my mom or my dad. They were going through their times and my sister and I were too young to understand the troubles or feelings they were going through. My baby sister died when she was 16 months old from meningitis and I know that was a big strain. Anyway…my dad stayed until my sister and I were old enough to understand what was going on, but it was not a happy home with all the fighting. When I turned 16 my mom and dad sat down with my sister and I and told us they were separating. I think I probably shocked them both because I said to them “It’s about time”. I told them all they do is fight and if they are not happy together why are they staying together. I said as long as they were happy I was happy and if being separated means them being happy then I’m for it as long as I can see them both as much or whenever I want to.
You might want to talk about seeing a counselor together and maybe they can help work out the problems with you and your husband. I don't know your husband or what he's like. I'm sure he has some good qualities, but if he does not want to contribute and work it out and thinks he is perfect and does nothing wrong and that writing you a letter pointing out your flaws is an okay way for a husband to treat his wife and if he won’t get counseling and doesn’t want to keep the marriage together then there are always other options.
I think most kids are a lot tougher than parents believe, and if you decide to leave with the help of a counselor or someone (other than your husband) to talk to them I’m sure they will make it through just fine. I wish my mom and dad had divorced a long time before they actually did so they would have been happier. It was very hard to see them both unhappy.
On the other hand you could be like me Irish friend and dish back to your husband what he gives to you. I’d say you should write him a letter pointing out all his flaws and insecurities. Then when he doesn’t seem too happy about it tell him… “There see how it feels? You don’t like it do you”.
Anyway…I wish you the best and hope you find happiness soon, and please don’t listen to EvaEv. She sounds like a real piece of work. – Hey maybe she is your husbands sister. Sounds like two peas in a pod! Just remember….you have great worth, and you are a good person and you deserve to be happy and your kids will be much happier knowing you are happy.
What an extremely tacky and insensitive
x
Amen Sister! She is totally unrealistic! Totally. Loved your post! sm
My grandparents (from VT), will tell you that my grandfather began farming at 6-7 under the supervision of his 10 year old brother. haha No major incidents - his mother tended the home and ran a nursery and she did have the siblings watch over each other. I didn't even think about all of this until you mentioned the farming post. I loved it!
I, for one, need plenty of sleep - so I must work during the day while they are here...Oops, I gottah go! My 2 year old just fell off the kitchen table.
just kidding
Children having children not a new thing, where do you live?
My son, who is now in his early 40s, told me years ago when in high school about all the teenage mothers that were at his school and said they brought the babies to school, and he seemed to think it was like the girls having playdolls like when you were little. This is not new and apparently folks think alright to have their children sans marriage, be it preteens, teens or adults. I guess my years alone do not make me shocked at anything anymore. Others talk about this job being isolated and your post says some of this if you were shocked at what the son said.
Totally, totally agree.
You feel inadequate and no matter what you do - you feel like it is not enough - and that is depression. Get on some medication, or get some therapy and start taking time for yourself and enjoy life. Been there and done that myself - STOP FEELING GUILTY - you deserve better!!
You must a) not have children or b) your children are young
I don’t see them as being spoiled- I see lots of kids in the age group of one (30+) who are totally in the me scene, not just the 1 I have- she married and her husband same - a me type person. The other not spoiled but just got nasty when he did not get the money left to me and he thought he should. Just to think, this was my chosen 1 if I had to choose. Oh well, live and let live is the way I see things now.
And not to mention
that the Feds are always illegally targeting and collecting info on individuals who have done nothing wrong. Which is why our Mayor of Portland opted out of the Terrorism Task Force- he knew they had a history of doing this and without being given the security clearance to be able to oversee his cops and be sure our civil liberties were protected he was not going to have any part of it.
And God help you if they have erroneous information on you-you could be turned away from boarding a flight because of that, God knows what else, and trying to fix it will make correcting your credit report seem like a breeze.
And then there is past history to go on- The TSA promised not to and then turned around and collected millions of personal records to test its Secure Flight pasenger screening program.
When Bush was trying to sell the Patriot Act he specifically said that wire tap requires a court order, that nothing had changed there. We all know what that was worth.
And yes, the feds will blackmail the states into complying by pulling funding for all kinds of necessary services. They did it to Portland when we were the only city in the country who had the audacity to not follow the script.
Brief novel, but must mention...
Watched an MSNCB special the other day (couple years old) about a lady who's hubby was burned beyond recognition (12 pounds left) in a car crash. She got $150,000. She had an infant and a 4y/o from prior marriage. Within short period of time she had new BF. "Jake". 4y/o started showing out. Family curious. ?'s asked. They faked the death. Jake was the husband, with just a hair color change. Dug up a mentally handicapped elderly lady's body from her grave and put it in car and sent it over cliff. That lady's last wishes was that she not be cremated!
Reason behind them faking the death, not insurance money...He was fixing to serve time for raping his niece and they did not want it to ruin his life because he would have to register as a sex offender after that! She saw no wrong in this. Did not see anything wrong with desacrating the grave, said that was "just a body". Did not even seem to think she did wrong by telling child his father (step) was dead and then bringing him back with a different name. People are sick.
Moral of that story...You never know!
How odd you should mention that
 I was just telling a friend last night I was thinking of just loading the dog in the car with me and taking off a few days. I just got out of a 28 year marriage and think it would be lots of fun! Let me know how it turns out for you. Best of luck!
Just to mention
I just read on the internet that Helio's fiancee of 6 years broke it off, maybe the poster below asking if he has a brother, does not need a brother, maybe she can go for the real thing!
Did I mention...
You sound so much like me! And I am 36 also! I am already dreading the daughter-in-law thing! You know with girls, they always want their moms around, with boys, it is pretty much up to whoever he marries! I wanna babysit the grandkids! Time to kiss butt to the new daughter-in-law, hope I like her!!!! Does anyone have any recommendations as far as good companies to work for? You know, not too big, with good QA people. I don't need fulltime or benefits. Thanks for any info!
Funny you should mention that
When my son confronted me about Santa (I forget his age but had to be older than 7) and I told him the truth, he was outright mad, but more so, hurt. "You lied to me." I felt absolutely horrible.
But I guess it's a tradition that we parents do *for the kids,* but I wonder if it's not for us.
We love to see their faces when they believe there might be some real magical fantasy person out there...
Not sure how my daughter (7 years younger than my son) took the news. I think she heard it through the grapevine and still plays along for my sake -- she's 19 LOL.
I seriously do not think it's wrong to not do the Santa thing, but I don't think it's appropriate subject matter for the classroom... hope my son never becomes a primary education teacher!!
Oh, forgot to mention....
there was absolutely no need for prepainting, Kiltz or anything. The job turned out really good and neither 1 professional. All you have to do is buy white indoor paint or whatever color you want.
forgot to mention--sm
if you go to rembrandt's website, you can view Griffin House video of *Waterfall*, plus hear some others of his music. In case anyone else wants to hear what I am so excited about. he he.
not to mention philodendron (sp), as well..sm
main reason why I do not have live houseplants in the house. Cats will eat them out of instinct. I get grass plants for the cats, and maybe an occasional cat nip plant. (love to watch that!). Holly is deadly, as well. Poinsettas, too. Too many to think about.
You did not mention if he is neutered or not, if not
t could definitely be stud tail. If he is neutered, it would not be. To treat stud, a bath is usually in order. Believe it or not, to ready my stud male for a show, I put mayo on that area, rub it in and wipe it off with paper towels for a few days before his show bath, then his bath comes out really nice and he is nice and silky.
forgot to mention
that we did this for less than two weeks and they started to turn black and fall off. You need to make sure that you tape it on there really good so that the acid can work its magic with the tape keeping the air from the area.
You're welcome, don't mention it..*S*..sm
and again, try to have a relaxing weekend - good news can be celebratory!!! CYA next week!!! 
because you mention paleontology
. . . this is one of those friends cousins exboyfriends brother-in-laws best friend had a buddy whose wife once knew someone who . . .
you get the idea, but the owner of a security company I worked for went to college with David Schwimmer.
someone much closer to me has eaten lunch with Wayne Williams (YIKES!)
P.S. I currently am without the apostrophe, so please pardon the above.
You didn't mention their age sm
If they are under 10 years of age, I would hesitate to get them real diamonds because, even though I am sure they would be very careful and take good care of them, there is always the chance that they might lose them. And here I'm not concerned with the value so much as how bad they would feel about losing them.
There are some really beautiful semiprecious stones out there - garnets are my favorite, deep, deep red. Also topaz, jade, pearl - lots of choices.
JMHO. I think it is really nice of you to want to give these girls a gift, and I don't see anything inappropriate about it at all. I have recently been reunited with some family members who have children and believe me on the children's birthdays I plan to get them something VERY nice!
You did not mention if a father of your son
is around or involved in any way. I think your first attention should be towards your son, not the BIL because apparently your child is doing some acting out and it tends to escalate. When parents of young children oohing and aahing about them, I think about how it turns like your story now a lot of times. I had somewhat similar bad behavior (although never went against my telling no), some drugs involved. I just told my son would send to my daddys home- would have been worse than prison for him and I knew that- ole timer- early to bed and early to rise, take no junk type person. My son turned around because I always told both my children I did not have time for crap- I had to work and make a living for them and I would never put up with backtalking, walking away and doing what they thought they could so, swearing, hitting or the like.
Forgot to also mention
Black Beauty. I was an absolute nut for horses when I was a young girl. 
Funny you mention this - (sm)
My parents were telling me about their neighbors, and I thought it was a cute story. These people moved in maybe 18 months ago and have a son, about 11 years old. This little guy came by to see my dad, who was working outside. Pretty soon he announced that he was good at that kind of work too, apparently wanting my dad to give him something to do! This amused my dad because that's how my older brother was. So he put the kid to work, helping him out in his spotlessly beautiful yard. Pretty soon the kid's parents came over and kept chatting with my parents, not leaving. Finally my mom asked if they would like to come in for a glass of wine, and apparently that's what they were waiting for, because they said SURE and went right in the house for some indoor socializing. Sometimes people are just waiting for an invitation I guess.
I forgot to mention
it was suggested to me throughout this process that the cat could have a urinary tract infection. I guess it is common that they will use the litter box and other places if this is the case. You can buy litter that changes colors to see if there is an infection. It's very difficult to get a sample from them. I found the litter at Wal-Mart.
funny you should mention it
 My daughter, who is 39, is hooked on it also after being at a party where they snuck it from the 8 year old kids!!
Funny you should mention it!
I was at a birthday party Saturday night and "Rotel Dip" was served among many other things. Needless to say, it was the hit of the night! (By the way, I am in Texas!)
I was going to mention Target as well
My daughter had a doll but we bought a lot of furniture and clothing over the years at Target and she was tickled with it. How old is the person you are shopping for?
I should mention that it is very time
consuming and can be messy, but we had great success with it. I did it on Sat. morning so we would have plenty of time. I also used Danorex shampoo on them the night before I did the Cetaphil. Wet hair and massage in, cover head with plastic bag and let set for 20 mins, then rinse out. If they withstand the stinging from the shampoo, it will kill live lice. Then we did the Cetaphil treatment.
Wow, I remember that, too, now that you mention it. sm
I don't so much remember seeing people smoking, but I remember cigarette butts being on the ground pretty much everywhere, and I was a kid in the ྂs. I also remember people going barefoot in public a lot more, including the grocery store. To this day I still call it "Winn-Dixie feet" when somebody has dirty feet!
not to mention exhausted!
I might give it a try if it also included a 7 day challenge for housework! lol
Funny you should mention this
I threatened my 14-year-old daughter with both of them yesterday when we saw them side by side at the drugstore. LOL.
Forgot to mention this...sm
I used to have sugar and lots of it in my coffee, and I just couldn't stand the taste of the sweeteners but I gave it a try anyway. One day at the Dunkin Donuts I switched and asked for Equal in my coffee and now I don't use sugar at all. I even tried Splenda but didn't lose any weight for about two months and I was getting sugar lows. I switched back from Splenda to Equal and dropped seven pounds that week after not dropping anything for two months.
I did NOT mention in my above post
that circumcision is necessary for hygiene. I was asserting the exact opposite: that it is NOT necessary for hygiene. And I said that because we perform this procedure in a sterile environment, we have duped ourselves as a culture into thinking that it is less barbaric.
Cleanliness is easy: Pull back the foreskin in the shower & rinse away the smegma, & voila. Lack of soap & water is the sorriest excuse for surgery I've ever heard, & don't go quoting statistics about cancer unless you are prepared to take on the AAP. I'm just the messenger.
Of course you're going to fight the concept that you've been duped & that children have suffered as a result. I hardly blame you.
Forgot to mention
that he quit having his paycheck direct deposited into our joint account, and I had just sent a house payment, so now there's nothing left there. "His lawyer" (He also lied to me about hiring one.) supposedly told him he should be paying child support. That, to me means putting money in that account, even if he's not using it. It's in both of our names, so shouldn't we both be able to use it for stuff for the kids, if nothing else?
Tonight, his mom kept telling us it wasn't fair that he should have to come here to see the kids. She kept talking about how I "wasn't being fair" to him. Well, was it fair that I had to leave my home and my life because I couldn't stand to be treated that way anymore. I talked to a pastor about it even, who asked me why I didn't respect myself more (before we left) I told her the alternative sucked, too.
I don't really know what resources are available, but I am in counseling, so that has helped a lot.
Forgot to mention
When you live in a remote location, sometimes what they call off-grid living is actually cheaper.
Composting toilets can replace septic tanks, though not necessarily cheaper, just without hooking up to water supplies or requiring re-digging the hole in 10-20 years when the original septic reaches the end of its lifespan.
Solar water heater.
Solar or wind powered well pump.
Solar electricity for household power.
Propane tank and propane powered appliances.
Just some ideas for you.
http://www.lehmans.com/ is an awesome source for off-grid living (like the Amish)
yeah, and don't forget to mention--sm
that it is HUMID there 99% of the time, even in the winter. If you like to sweat, it is great! There is also the possibility of hurricanes, depending on how close you are to the coast, but even inland can get the effects of them. Just some of the cons. thought I would throw them in. I lived in SE Virginia, clost to NC border...hated it! Beautiful country!! but lousy weather! Glad I am back in WI.
Thanks, I'll mention it on my next check...
It's not really bothering me, per se, other than worrying a little about the ice wearing on my teeth, but I was curious to see what others thought. (Feeling gabby today!) :)
Thanks!
you didn't mention if you banged it or not....
and no, we cannot diagnose you, you need a picture, and they'll probably buddy tape it anyway......Ice, elevation, buddy tape and you'll be in good shape (I have broken every toe in my feet, except the great toes, during my lifetime and healed themselves with same treatment). Hope it feels better soon!
Hayseed you forgot to mention
that if you were Pres you would do away with outsourcing MT jobs and increase our salaries and bennies and ensure that we all got mandatory 4 weeks paid vacation every year! I know you were thinking it, you just overlooked! Hayseed for President!
Did I mention he's a horrible person?
Just wanted to make that point clear.
Re: "I'm not exactly proud of you."
He's lucky if you don't remove the source of all men's pride and joy, like Mrs. Bobbitt did. Grrrrr.
Don't mention it hon - Hope Fred comes thru 100%
I had a feeling you were going to tell me high up on the tail, close to the body.
Don't thank me - I so know what you're going through, my cat of 12 years died in 2004 and I have never gotten over him (he was just a sickly cat, whose life I extended, per the vet, with love and caring) and have since gotten another cat (it was 1 y/o when I got her) but it's just not the same.......tho I do love her now...took me 3 years though *laughs*.....the other one I had since kittendom.....
Still, keep us posted  and will pray Fred does real well....
I forgot to mention 2 other things
A screaming child cannot hear you if you whisper, so if you speak so softly they have to turn down their own volume to hear you, you get rewarded with some quiet. You can also tell them you can't hear them unless they speak quietly as well. When my GD is watching TV, talking over it and my headphones are in my ears, I about go nuts! I have started telling her lately that I need her to be quiet when my 'ears' are in so I can 'hear the voices in my head' LOL!
The other thing is talking about trust. "I want pancakes now!" and your response is "I'm in the middle of doing such and such...I can make pancakes for you tomorrow morning. Will you trust me to do that for you then?" Explain that trust means believing you will keep your word. That also works both ways. If you want good behavior on a shopping trip, talk about needing to trust him to behave on the trip and if he does, reward that trust.
I know that there is no one way to raise a child and you just have to do the best you can. Sounds like you have your plate full...I can SO relate to having to try different things. My little one has an oppositional defiant personality (sounds a bit like your 3 yo!) so it really does take trial and error to find a good balance. Best of luck to you. :)
Oh, did I also mention we were the same people? LOL! It was a blast! sm
I took a few ideas from here, but the chicken wings in the crockpot (flavored from Sam's) was the biggest hit! I had 3 ladies bring chips and dip! Anyways, he had the best time and the cake was out of this world!! Thanks for asking!
I forgot to mention the site :-)
http://tinyurl.com/6jsn6e
I had to mention the guy on America's Got Talent s/m
the other night who sang opera! What a talent and what a warm wonderful guy who broke down when he spoke of his mother, what she has done for him, and what this means to her! 
I just mention to family that I read
about such and such on the MT Board that I visit during the day.
I suspect that once I mention this to my husband
that he will side with his sisters and not give a darn that my son is graduating. I even expect he will have an ugly comment to make about it also.
Did they mention anything about pre-existing on this plan? nm
Very interested if they cannot turn you down but have major pre-existing issues. Thanks for the info!
BTW, I forgot to mention, when you try the plunger before....sm
turning the water off (if this doesn't work and you have to take the pipe loose) add some water in the sink so the plunger builds up some movement with the water and may break loose whatever is hung up in the sink.
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