moderator, we are so supportive of each other here
Posted By: MissAnthrope on 2008-07-24
In Reply to: how do you know if you have an eating issue sm - tadpole
i wish we had a weight loss board...has this been given any more thought?
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Thank you for your supportive response
I am still wondering what to do. After talking with some of his friends he posted something like this about 2 months ago. He has an appiontment tomorrw with a pyschiatrist. He doesn't know about it, I plan on just checking him out of school. Maybe this is wrong but at the age of 19 I swallowed a bottle of pills. My best friend was the only one that suspected I might do this and she showed up at my house totally unannounced. Now as a mother I think about the pain that mother would have felt because had my friend not shown up my mother would have found me. I can't just sit back and watch. If this were drugs or cutting we would all step up and take action immediately.
Thanks. My friends are very supportive (sm)
but my dad just told me I couldn't use his minivan for my move because he didn't want to be involved. He's loaning my DH money to get out of debt though. Family is funny.
Do not enable, but be supportive
and whatever happens, do not encourage a methadone clinc. Your son may need a dual diagnosis clinic to learn emotional coping skills and receive rehab. I am a little concerned that you automatically reject the idea of rehab without having talked to him. You need to learn pretty quickly that going into rehab is only for those who are self-motivated or are avoiding jail. You do not have to make your approach to your son confrontational. You can be firm about wanting him to make good choices for himself without being confrontational. Put your foot down about not having drugs in your home, even if it means he cannot visit within your home. No loaning a car to him. You don't want to lose either of those. No friends over. I've even handed my daughter a self-test at the door and made her give me her purse to search. She chose not to visit for the next 2 years and that was her choice...not the one I would prefer, but hers to live with. If your son is addicted to drugs, he will not get better until he wants to and not one minute before. The best advise I ever got was this:
_When something becomes uncomfortable enough, you will do something to change it_
Your son may have to hit bottom. It sounds like he is cycling with ups and downs (cocaine then heroin) and that is an indication of something pretty serious and tough to overcome. My faith is never tested as much as when I struggle not to do something to control the choices my adult child is making. Letting go while being supportive is very, very hard. Good luck.
Just be supportive and a loving friend/family member - sm
My son jokingly tells me that I have Super Gay-Dar because I have had a few friends out to me first.
When my friend Chris came out to me a few years after high school, he was a complete wreck.
He called me up one night after I had not heard from him for awhile and the conversation went something like this.
Him: I really have to tell you something (I could tell he was shaking terribly and just sounded so upset and scared.)
Me: Okay.
Him: I'm gay. There I said it.
Me: And?
Him: What do you mean AND?
Me: Are you serious? You think I DIDN'T know? How many times were we BOTH checking out guys "back pockets" in the mall? How many times did YOU help me pick out dresses for formal dances? How many times did my parents let you come over for slumber parties all the way through high school? Do you think they let ANY of my other guy friends do that? Did you notice there were no other GUYS at those sleepovers?
Him: He has such a funny loud, barking laugh and he just started laughing and then crying.
Me: You wouldn't be you if you tried to be a straight guy. You're more fun this way.
Him: I just love ya girlie, You're my bestest bestest girlfriend.
Me: You're my bestest bestest girlfriend too.
And that was that. We still laugh about it. He can always make me laugh.
Great, greatly supportive post from "Through the Mill". nm
.....
I have seen where the moderator came on
and took off postings for things they considered offensive as in flaming postings, calling others names, cursing and the like. My posting contained none of the above.
okay. Did not know the admi/moderator
have discussed this situation before. I do not come onto this board very much. I guess the above poster Junie did not know either.
The board moderator
Frankly, I think the moderator of this board does a very good job considering the many posts on a vast variety of topics, and with numerous personalities posting them. If I or my friend on this board would be doing anything that is unacceptable or inappropriate we would have been told. I am quite sure of that.
Why this person continues to make an issue of our conversations about the beauty of animals and the love we share for them and our animals is totally beyond the reach of what I can understand. Frankly, the last post two days after the first insult is an indication to me that it is ongoing. If anyone needs to be told, it is the one who won't leave us or the matter alone. We have done absolutely nothing wrong and have said absolutely nothing inappropriate. I am tired of the issue. It was ridiculous two days ago. No one is forced to participate in this board or made to continue to read what is supposed to be so boring and meaningless. What is meaningless is this constat back and forth over something that is not her business.
bless the moderator...
thank you
Thanks for explaining that moderator
as I was wondering why it was brought up after the "discussion" was last week although I did not get to read the post.
With all due respect moderator
I really do not think this is the poster. I have read her posts and she has always been very nice and compassionate. Not that it matters anymore, the poster that was starting arguments went under the handle of Z. I admit I was also nasty as she upset me by calling me a "goof" and kept escalating the discussion which then became a heated argument between the two of us. I apologize for my involvement in that thread and should not have let someone get the better of me over something stupid.
Hey moderator -- please help us out here, explain to
GP, did the moderator take down all the other posts here? sm
There were a whole bunch of posts having to do wtih cast iron, you and sam being from the same part of the country, etc. If the mod did take them down, why?? I did not see anything out of the ordinary. Or am I missing something obvious?
Cursing on here- Oh moderator.....
The truth hurts, doesn’t it?
email the moderator, they may have some suggestions--sm
It may be your browser or some such techi thing. good luck.
To Moderator: Can we please have a games board?
Besides the word association, there are other fun things to do which we can post on breaks for typing. Before, we had fun on the gab board but it polluted (I admit) the ability of people to read regular gabbing. Do you think you could consider making a board for word games, and other things like that? It would be appreciated. Thanks for your consideration.
My post was deleted...moderator why?
I was asking for positive energy for my daughter...why was it deleted???
I have the same problem and asked the moderator
yesterday on the main board but got no response.
Me, too! Were u on that board when Mary was still moderator? Nm
nm
TO MODERATOR: Would you please take the cursing off this board.
Let it go back to the politics. We are just fine here.
Why do you think the moderator bans such actions?
xx
In case I get banned, or not, that's for the moderator
to decide, I know it was you, 'daisy', because you announced it in your upper post.
Moderator, I am not the one who continued that argument. I made one comment which was SM
deleted. I am almost in tears over this. You have made a terrible, terrible mistake. I make no crude remarks to moderators, ever, ever. I am the one who posted about the beautiful dog at the ASPCA and talk of almost nothing else. I want you to check your addresses and personaly apologize to me. You have made a grave mistake in what you jus posted. I have thanked moderators in the past and have actually posted a few days ago saying I don't understand why people have to be so mean. You need to be accurate before you accuse me.
Moderator needs to see, unable to read posts and I am with Bellsouth, not comcast
Nothing here I guess
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