it seems awfully hard hearted for people to say to ignore him...
Posted By: Kendra on 2008-12-23
In Reply to: I think my dad needs to be committed..sm - sm
After all, he is your dad. I do not know what you should do, but I don't think that cutting him out of your life is going to help him any. Sometimes, I think people do things for attention because they need attention.
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I still find it hard hearted...
Comparing your father in law to a father is not the same thing. This woman is an adult and her father was there while she was growing up. I just think that raising children earns a little compassion and respect. Call me silly. I also think that it is a little unfair that we only get one side of the story. I just hope that she does not write him off and live to regret it. Heaven forbid we act as caring people during the holiday season.
Well i have SEEN certain people that make evolution hard to argue!!!
nm
Is it hard to find considerate people these days? sm
seems like no one is considerate of anyone else anymore. I dropped a few friends because of it. A recent friend is being inconsiderate also, husband wonders why I still do things with her. Well, you know, you can't just not have any friends and since everyone seems to be that way, what else can you do? People are late, don't follow through, are self-centered, etc. The way of the world these days I guess.
What a good-hearted boy he is!
I'm sure he will grow into a fine man and some lucky girl out there will hit the jackpot, husband-wise!
Congratulations on raising a fine son!
Broken hearted. SM
Last Wednesday evening I called the police regarding dog barking right next to my house. It was just terrible all day, 12 hours the dog was at the door and they did not let it in, then they left. I kept leaving the house and coming back to avoid it. It was day off. This has been a problem with these people,who have beautiful dogs. Some days not bad at all, some just terrible. I finally could not take it any longer. I waited for the police to come out in front of theh house and the neighbor and his wife drove up shortly afterwards. When the neighbor first saw the police he apologized for his barking dog, which was still going crazy. When I, trying to be upfront and honest, told him I called and was sorry for doing so, things got bad. He was swinging his arms around, denying everything, etc. He said the next time my car is stuck in the snow I can just remember what I did to him. I never ask for anyone's help, but a few times he helped get my car out. I take care of myself and never, ever ask anyone for help. Now it is silent next door. I love dogs more than anything and just wanted the police to help me speak to him. The policeman said that the guy handled it very immaturely and told the guy he was blowing this out of proportion. I am sad and feel terrible living here now. Please help.
Marilyn...you are a big-hearted
woman and a positive role model for those children. I applaud you for stepping in.
I just want to say what a kind-hearted post this was!! (sm)
If only everyone in the world could be so understanding of each other!
Some of us are fortunate enough to NOT be cold-hearted shrews!
who care only for themselves and nobody else. We care deeply about our loved ones and it is extremely difficult to turn them out, even if it is the right thing and only thing left to do! It's not about backbone, lady! Where's your compassion? This is painful for her. She is watching her father sink further and further into mental illness and she feels helpless. She wants to fix him, take care of him, and make him better, but she is realizing she can't. That's a painful realization -- the realization that no matter how much you love them, no matter how much you try to help, it will never be enough, you will never succeed, and the only thing left to do is save yourself.
Curious Girl, will eventually do what she needs to do, but doing what is right can be just as painful as something that is wrong. What she needs are shoulders to cry on and people around her to tell her she's a good person NOT criticize her and tell her she needs to grow a backbone!
How do you deal with unreliable but kind-hearted friend? (sm)
I have a friend who is so sweet and kind, wouldn't hurt a fly, but never has her act together. Chronically having financial issues, phone turned off, electricity turned off, borrows money, phone back on, phone back off, etcl, still more financial issues. Always cancellig plans at the last minute, sometimes with no call, because of course, phone is turned off. She has a fairly good job, and although I know money is tight, it seems she keeps overextending herself. But she is so nice and good-hearted. But I am still frustrated with all the no-shows and cancellations and constant issues. Have you ever had that type of situation and do you just keep dealing with them because they are sweet people or do you just stop dealing with it? Does dealing with it make you an enabler?
Rose, the good-hearted, animal-loving ditz!! But with
s
Don't ignore it
How close are you to the niece? I have several nieces and nephews that I am close to. They aren't teenagers anymore, but a few of them went through similar situations.
If it were me, I would first talk to the niece and ask her if these stories are true. Explain that she needs to protect herself - not use birth control pills and condoms but staying away from alcohol and drugs which put her in a dangerously vulnerable situation. Does she understand how many young people will spike her drinks just to see her get loopy?
If you thought she was playing Russian roulette, you wouldn't hesitate to get involved - talk to her and then talk to your sister.
Best of luck to you - I really do understand your feelings.
Please ignore the meanies
You obviously needed support/comfort today, and I'm sorry that certain posters who did not have anything nice to say would not just skip your post.
I do hope your ex will change his mind and let your son visit, for you and for him. If not, my hope is that you will be able get through the disappointment and try to look forward to the next time he is able to visit. It sounds like it is best not to "argue" with your ex on this, and perhaps by "turning the other cheek", so to speak, and not letting him know you are upset with him personally about this, just disappointed, he may let your son visit for part of the summer??
Whatever happens, try to keep your chin up and look ahead.
Please ignore the above post
My hubby often does not listen to me but I know for a fact he is not having an affair.
I have just quit listening to him as well. It has become a joke in our family. Not to make light of your situation, I know yours is more serious, but don't assume he is having an affair. I guess it is possible, but how the above poster "knows" he is having an affair is ludicrous.
why not just ignore my post and be on yours
x
a little too coincidental to ignore...
x
Don't be so quick to ignore it
I had something similar happen to me but it was a phone call. Would never have suspected it but it turned out to be true. It is much better to know than to be fooled. Check into it and you will find the truth. I found proof from the cell phone numbers. Very easy to find a pattern. Good luck. I truly hope it is just a prank. Not a fun thing to go through.
My ignore list.
Any kind of meat
Sweet Potatoes
Yams
Pizza (sadly, that is a recent addition. My stomach can't handle it)
Raw eggs
Plain iceberg lettuce
Plain hazelnuts (which I just recently discovered are aka "filberts." Ha.)
Unsalted peanuts
Boca burgers
I'll only eat tofu if it's in a very spicy Thai dish
Totally inappropriate, but I think I would probably ignore it.
nm
Ignore the trolls....they are just looking to cause a stir.
I wish everyone could be guaranteed the day off from work to do with as they wish.
it IS MOST rude to ignore any RSVP....got it?
I would totally ignore them. Difficult as it is
if you do not give them a moment of attention or let them know you are offended - they will eventually stop. Why play their game - stoop to their level? Then they have won
She's just trying to stir stuff up - ignore her - sm
Notice she didn't mention having to chase after and care for children.
Maybe her kids are grown. I don't know about you but I am always on the go with the kids. My mom rarely had time to do stuff with us when we were kids and WE cleaned HER house too.
KitKat sounds like a troll.
oh, it occurred to her, she chose to ignore it...
and these people had to pay $7000 income tax on these vehicles so most of them sold the vehicles instead. However, giving a car isn't as bad as a plasma TV in my mind for the homeless because at least they could sleep in the car(s)......cellphones and plasmas for the homeless made no sense whatsoever to me.
I would just ignore and move on, she sounds - sm
a bit confused, is dementia setting in both mom and the grandma, or are they just drauma queens? As for both of your kids going to a birthday party, who cares, if only one is invited what is the big deal, maybe the kid inviting is not friends with the brother, or there is a big age difference, etc. I have 2 girls and don't take both of them to the party that only 1 was invited to, very bad manners as you point out to invite your other child so they "don't feel left out", which sounds like your mom and grandma think. Maybe your younger son is more spoiled than the first one (hard not to do) or is more social and has more friends. Totally screwy. I'd just invite her, not ask her about it, and just go on like nothing happened.
If you're sure it isn't true, ignore it
It's certainly an easy way for someone to try to make trouble for your husband. I wouldn't pursue trying to figure out who sent it. Don't give them the satisfaction.
I was taught to "always ignore the ignorant."
Unfortunately, I've run into people like that before, and I just ignore the comment, make nice chit-chat for a few minutes and "see you later alligator." At least, I demonstrated what my values are and did not degrade myself to their level. The main word here is "ignorant." There are so many people out there that are ignorant of their own manners, ignorant of other people's feelings, just tactless mules.
I really think a lot of it is just to get a response. Ignore the unfounded remarks and let's SM
just go on as usual praising the dogs and all the things that make us smile!!!!
Agree...and the gang mentality thing is often quick to surface when challenged. Ignore these
s
you can give the people the facts, but the decision making process should be left to the people
This is what our country is founded on FREEDOM OF CHOICE! I'm laughing already; you are just as mortal as the rest of us, and don' even attempt to that you've never done anything in your lifetime that was unsafe or unhealthy. NOT gonna buy it.
it is wonderful to see how many people have such strong opinions about people in debt.
I thought that the purpose of this board was to be able to post without being judged unfairly or have somebody tell you how wonderful their personal life is, and therefore you are causing their life to be less wonderful with your irresponsibility. Well, the saying "walk a mile in my shoes" is a good one in this case. Since you have no personal information about the person you are lambasting because they are looking for information on their debt, you can feel superior. Had you had personal information about them, you might act in a more human manner. Consider fighting cancer for 4 years, working and being debilitated while you do, suffering the effects of chemo, going into debt to maintain your home for your children and looking for a way out of debt SHOULD YOU EVEN LIVE THROUGH THIS!! Thank you for the kind comments. To the judgmental people I say please take a step back before you judge. You do not know who you are talking to and if you knew the personal information maybe your comments would be kinder.
I get frustrated by the double standard they use when judging people. They let certain people go sa
What do you think about the voting process?
People who go around calling other people "low class"
have their own issues in life. Ignore them. Nothing like a misplaced superiority complex to make a person feel good about themselves. Like they've never done anything gauche or made a faux pas. It must be nice for them to be so perfect and live in a glass house.
For that matter, you probably saved your piggy's life by popping that mondo zit! It could have gotten infected or something.... (yes, I have a zit popping fixation myself, but you were really descriptive on that pig zit. gag LOL)
Man, you would have appreciated the time one of my relative's popped a HUGE cyst on her face. I was standing right next to her at the time and leaned back because I knew it was going to blow. It did! Big time! All over the wall, mirror and light fixture. I'm still disgusted by the thought of it 10 years later. LOL In a revering kind of way...
some people did, some people didn't. It's their choice.
x
I know how hard it is......sm
I understand what you're saying. God didn't give us the ability to forget, just the strength to get through it. Have you talked with your husband. Does he seem happy to have this child or has he ever said he was sorry for ever wanting that now that the child is here? Maybe if you could hear him say he was sorry for ever wanting that and couldn't imagine your child not being here, maybe that would help. Seeing true remorse in a person goes a long way in helping you deal with this.
Hard to say
If I had it to do over again, I probably would not have married my husband. He and I are not very well suited to each other at all. But then I wouldn't have my wonderful son, so I can't say I entirely regret it. And after 27 years of marriage, my husband and I finally have a great relationship, with the help of an excellent marriage counselor. What's that saying - I've been happily married for 8 years, but we were married 27 years ago.
I'm sorry - I know it must be hard for you (sm)
I don't have experience with it, but at lesat she is making the decision and you don't have to make it. There are also assisted living facilities that are not so much a nursing home, if you think that would be an option for her. Best wishes to you.
i know it is hard to believe
but I didn't see a pay phone in the dorm. You can get a room phone installed but it is expensive. I guess that is a thought though.
Even if I could contact AIM, I don't think I would. He is 18 and really I can't tell them not to let him use his free account. He's an adult (at least in terms of the law) even if he isn't acting very mature. The way it is now, I can see if he is online and talk to him. If I did something like that he would jsut make up a new screen name that I wouldn't have at all. I just don't think that is a good idea.
This is so hard
Your dog is beautiful. I know how attached you get and how much love these little guys give us.
We just had to go through much the same thing with our 9-year-old lab, Murphy. He got pancreatitis and was very sick, started to get better, but then really took a turn for the worse. He was unable to get up and walk and just cried and cried. After a couple of days, we all decided it was best to have him euthanized. It was the hardest decision I ever had to make, but none of us could stand to watch him suffer any more. He has had this look in his eyes like he was saying let me go.
Not saying that that is the right decision for you. I think you will know in your heart when it is time. Just try to keep him as comfortable and happy as possible.
My heart goes out to you and Fox.
re: having a hard day/NC MT
It depends on where your degree is from, and where you plan to go to school. If your college credit is from a community college, it should most certainly transfer. You really have to check with a counselor from the school you wish to attend. Good luck!
I'm so sorry...I know it must be so hard (sm)
at least it has only been 8 months though...so you two have no children together, right? No having to beg for sex when you are a newlywed is not normal. I have a lot of marital issues myself thought not similar...please e-mail me if you want to talk!
7 is a hard age sm
Had a 2nd grader who was after much angst by all, diagnosed as gifted. I was able to put him in private school, quieter, excelled at everything, is now an entrepeneur and doctoral candidate. It was not easy to pay the bills, but worked harder than ever. The school had me thinking it was my parenting skills, or lack of them, his behavior, his needing more male positive image, etc., etc. If I had istened to them he would have been put in a special class with those with learning difficulties. All in all, I was crying every day. Took a lot of time and energy. Looking back, his teacher was at fault for mislabeling him and not appreciating his talent. I think he was smarter than she was. We shudder at even the mention of her name. Some don't deserve to be teaching. Don't let her be mislabeled. Thank goodness, I knew someone in the field who tested as I was transcribing his work. It's a very hard road you have in front of you. Don't be discouraged, please. Good luck with it, it's very difficult. Keep examining the whole picture. God bless you.
So sorry. I know this has to be so hard
but she obviously is in a very loving home. Take a little comfort in knowing that you gave her a wonderful life.
it must be hard
person... i mean if you have only felt the need to apologize one time that must be some sort of record. correct me if i'm wrong, but you were apologizing at that particular time even though you were not at fault?
I did it on my own. It was not hard. No one else will
It did take some time to educate myself but it was not difficult. Got Money magazine and started reading. Also read other mags. I did have someone to talk to but could have done it without this person. Also, the investment groups 800 numbers were able to answer questions I had. It was acutally fun, in an odd way, knowing I was taking care of me, without having to pay someone else to do it. And that someone else would also be paid, out of my money, for giving me advice I could find for myself.
It's so hard to know ....
It's so hard to know the truth when these stories are printed in the Enquirer and papers of that kind. I hope this is one of those stories that turn out to be just sensationalism. How sad for him if it isn't!
What's hard is that
we have been keeping all of our kids' college funds in the stockmarket. After a big hit in 2001, they were doing OK. But now that we're really having to use them, the money just isn't there.
I'm wondering if it makes more sense to keep the money in the market (waiting for recovery) and take out a loan for the college tuition.
No wonder it's so hard to get through - and why
And yet US hospitals are trusting confidential data to the people who built that tangled mess. Unbelievable.
It's really hard to tell ...
what the true tones of some of these texts are meant to be.
It seems what I am reading is saying to tell the truth in an abstract way, just not in a personal way.
If anyone cares, my kids are only 4, 5, and 8, so the subject of my experience with alcohol and sex would be totally inappropriate. I was just wondering if anyone had an experience where being truthful with their older kids (18+) about herself was helpful. Apparently not?
me too and its so hard! nm
x
Not too hard for me, either.
I probably only eat meat 3 times a week as it is. I've committed to a vegetarian diet several times before in my life, and kept it up the longest for about 3 years. The thing that pulls me back to the meat eating side is hamburgers. I don't know why, but I love 'em! Really good ones... not fast food "patties". Also, I don't have any issues about not eating animals. I think some animals are quite tasty. But I can do fine without eating them, too. Were I more committed to vegetarian philosophy, I'm sure it would be a different story.
Too hard for me
b
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