hydrocephalus
Posted By: sm on 2007-03-26
In Reply to: Well I had a friend at work who wanted a baby badly - and at 7 months along found out the baby
When my mother was pregnant with my last brother, at 6 months of age, her body tried to abort the baby. She bled and bled and wound up being put in the hospital (this was in the late 1950s). They did not have all this technology, but they tried to keep her from having the miscarriage and succeeded. They sent her home. She had to stay in bed for 3 months and during that 3 months, almost lost my mother several times due to hemorrhaging.
Anyway, when my brother was born, he was simply beautiful. He had the bluest eyes I have ever seen on any child. He was perfect we thought. When he was 3 months old, he started to run a very high temperature and mama called the doctor to come out to the house (they made house calls back then) and when the doc came out, he told us that we needed to get my brother to the hospital ASAP because he had hydrocephalus. His head was larger than normal (longer from front to back and his soft spot was tight). My little brother spent 3 years in and out of the hospital, multiple surgeries, was never able to talk, never grew. He looked the same as he did as a newborn. I loved him so much. I remember this all like it were yesterday...visiting him in the hospital, seeing him in convulsions, and occasionally we could take him home. I would hold him almost all the time he was awake.
Well we lost him when he was 3-1/2. He died in the hospital. How did he die? He died of falling off of the bed and the shunt breaking. This baby could not turn over or move. He was in one position all the time.
This little life made a difference in ours. Unfortunately, they told us that he could never see us or hear us (though I really cannot believe that as sometimes he did respond). Each little person makes an imprint, but that was no life for my brother.
I am pro-choice. I believe these tests were developed for reasons such as this...not to avoid a problem, but for the parent to make that choice because there is a risk to the baby. Either way, that baby would make a difference in our lives, but what kind of life is that for a child.
Now, there are different degrees of hydrocephalus...it depends on what is causing the hydrocephalus. Hydro is just a symptom of an illness. Therefore, that is a hard decision for someone to have to make...and those who have had to make that decision did what was best for them and I am sure not easily.
Just because a child has hydrocephalus, does not give someone an instant "I want to abort." There are decisions to be made. I think it right that there is a choice, but that decision is not an easy decision to make no matter what way a parent chooses.
If a parent chooses to go on and have that child, just like the poster below, her child is precious to her and is her world. These are special children.
What I am saying is that either way, these children are special...whether we choose to have them or whether we choose not to put them through a life that is unknown.
God bless the mother below whose daughter is doing well. I know how much you cherish your little girl. I wish my brother had done well, but under the circumstances, there was no way he would have ever functioned normally. I loved him so much and we were heartbroken. I will always remember him and to this day, my mother has never mentioned that she was sorry she gave birth to him, though there weren't choices back then, but had they known then what they do today, I doubt they would have tried to keep her from miscarrying.
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FYI.. I gave birth to a child with hydrocephalus
She'll turn 7 in August, is in first grade, loving it, developing "normally." We had a tough go at first with surgeries, a shunt infection, and finally got her home from the hospital at 6 weeks old, and then had an abrupt shunt failure when she was 5 with emergency surgery. Other than that, you wouldn't know that she has medical issues at all. She is absolutely the light of my life. I can't imagine having snuffed out this little light before it even had a chance to shine.
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