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he wants your attention; take an hour and play with him

Posted By: -spend time each day with him - n/m on 2007-12-19
In Reply to: Me again! I am so frustrated, scared, and upset over here. I'm sorry, but sm - Mom

nm


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I think someone liked the attention
The "I'm so appalled" act is just that, an act.

I can't imagine being that needy of male attention beyond high school or college age, but that's what I'm reading into this one.
Most likely it was done for attention, like
everything else she's been doing. That's what you have to do when everybody has already seen your shaved nether-regions, I guess.
She does it for the attention, especially if she's sm
grinning at you afterward. I would just put her in the playpen or in the middle of the livingroom floor where she can't bang into anything or hurt herself and walk away. If she doesn't get a reaction, it won't be fun anymore. Good luck. They can be real stinkers, even at that young age.
He only wants attention
He only wants back what he had before, which was someone taking care of him financially and other ways. His threats of suicide are only to make you feel sorry for him and do what he wants. basically a form of manipulation. A person who truly wants to end his life will not "threaten", but just do it. been there with others in my family. If you "allow" him to manipulate you, you are feeding his problem. Make him stand on his own and either make it or fail. If he fails enough, he will learn to make it on his own. Don't take up his whining. Don't give into his "demands." Don't answer the phone. Don't answer the door. When he can't find someone to feel sorry for him, he will move on to the next target, or try it on his own. He has just never grown up. He has been catered to all his life and wants that to not change. My mother is the same way. You have to be strong. You have to disassociate. It's hard, but "tough love." good luck to you.
Just pay attention
to what he says and does in the future. It may have had harmless intent, but if he really is looking to use you, it will keep showing up in various ways.
ya really think the cashiers even PAY ATTENTION????

She's getting waaaay too much attention
I heard she was offered a half million dollar contract to be a spokesperson for an adult DVD company.
THANK YOU for bringing that to my attention

I totally agree, and I signed the petition. I wish they would pass a similar bill about childbirth. Some women can only stay in the hospital 24 hours after their child is born (or it may be 24 hours total, I'm not sure). Or at least that's all their insurance will pay for, if it is a healthy birth with no complications.


I am currently fighting with my HMO about a medication that I desperately need. At the moment I am buying it through a "Canadian pharmacy" (based in New York state) and it is sent to me from Mumbai, India. In the U.S., the medication costs $10.00 a pill!!!  Through this pharmacy, I get it for $1.77 a pill.  But it is still more than twice what my normal co-pay would be if the $#@%#$ HMO would cover it.


So any kind of insurance reform bills that ANYONE knows about, PLEASE pass the info along. Thanks!


This sounds more like a way to get attention.

If he's feeling like he wants to do things himself, then let him.  I think if you feed into it then that would make him do it more.  I would simply say to him "Okay, if you're not going to be nice, then Mommy is leaving the room now".  Tell him to let you know when he can be nice and you'll come back to play or show him things.  He does probably know this behavior causes quite a stir with you.  He'll most likely grow out of it though.  I think all kids have temper tantrums.  It is part of growing up.  Some adults even still to this day throw temper tantrums, so go figure!  I'm sure things will work themselves out. 


P/S:  Reward him for good behavior and time out or not giving him attention for bad behavior.  Put a chart on the refrigerator so that he can keep track himself when he is nice and watch how fast he wants to be nice so he can put the sticker on the chart or what have you! 


Sounds like he got a LOT of attention
x
I'll bet if you pay attention
you will discover some fears. Some you might not recognize as fear but insecurities are fears and everyone has some.
I think that attention-seeker should definitely
give her poor mom a break, and quit sponging off her. Then she could hire a couple Super-nannies to take care of all those kids, and pay her own medical bills for them, instead of us taxpayers.

I think she'd be an excellent porn-star. She's halfway there already.
People should pay attention and put posts on
nm
Media and attention seekers...sm
There is nothing wrong with "children today" anymore than children of any other day.  Half the problem is the media and all the attention they are giving this and other similar things of this nature.  The media are reporting every shooting, every violent act they can get their hands on and grouping them together because people watch this crap.  Bad things happen every day and will continue to happen.  It's just part of life.  The more media attention things like this get, the more people wanting attention will copy it.
Pay attention to post above hypothyroid too
because I, after taking Synthroid for years and having the excessive hair loss among other things, came to this board and was told about Armour and I went to my physician and told him that was what I wanted and got onto that. The itching immediately went away, the coldness stays with me as soon as the temperature dips, have cold extremities always in the winter months and as I said before, still have moments of absolute exhausation where I take time to just recline and spend about 30 minutes there. I told my daughter about my diagnosis but could not find on my maternal side a previous diagnosis. Asking my father, he was unable to give me any history on his side so I figured we just ought to do a DNA. Just kidding. Good luck!
They need it all - Love, attention and Discipline (sm)
Not saying my two will never do anything wrong - they are 10 and 7 - but I shower them with love and attention - However, they know what lines not to cross too. However in the case above, it just sounds like pure out neglect -my 10 year old would not be somewhere without me knowing it to begin with (nor when he is 12 for that matter)and it would not even cross his mind to do something like that. I would think he had gone totally insane!
Could be an attention/jealously thing too - sm
Why did dad take both kids to the game? Yeah its a lot harder with a little one but he needs to learn how to act when out in public too. We started taking ours out to dinner with us at a young age. They know how to act in a resturant and behave because of it. As for his comment on how hard can it be, this Saturday I'd dump the 3-y/o on him and go out for the entire day and see how he copes. My 2 (girls) have always been pretty good, they have had their moments and I have used time-outs, spanking, taking away treats/toys, etc. But are you right on target ignoring it, just walk away and let him scream, if he makes a mess have him (help) clean it up after he is done wailing. As it maybe being a cry for more of your attention or your husbands, are you working more than usual right now, do you spend any 1:1 time with him for say 20-30 minutes a day? If he doesn't get much of that then try making some time for him and get your DH to take him somewhere too just the 2 of them (granted if he is anything like my DH he never has the kids.....mine just started doing stuff with them on his own about 2 years ago when they were 5 and 7, so I get the rare 3 hours to myself on Saturday if he takes them to the movies or bowling). But your DH definitely needs to get a clue.
Sounds like she is trying to get attention to me and it is working. sm
Can you not call and speak to the counselor yourself rather than your son? I couldn't confront the mother either but the counselor could if she saw it fit.
But look at all the attention you get every time you post about it. sm
As Dr. Phil would say, you're getting something out of this drama. You're getting all kinds of attention and pity. You spend a lot of time recounting all the details of every encounter on here.
I think lots of times it is the 1 you don't pay attention to
How about the 17 year old in Germany that killed so many today. He was an average student, blended in, no problems before in his life and suddenly goes on a rampage, goes back to his old high school and shoots at random. I probably would be taking a 5 years old's comment like this with a grain of salt knowing the age. I would let it go this time but if it continued then I would think who would be the most objective, the parents, someone at school and that is who I would approach. The parents might even be worse than this kid. I have seen really bad kid before and what do you know, the parent just as bad.
And I think someone is jealous, what's wrong, no male attention for you? lol
I totally agree with the OP. I too have been inappropriately treated by men, uncomfortable staring or smiling or flitatious comments and it gets a little tiresome. The problem is that men never grow up. They would do this into their 90s if they could still see!
yup - back and CRAVING attention, as usual...n/m

When did parents stop paying attention?
I'm nearly done raising my kids, and they're good kids. In addition, I've been a boy scout leader for 12 years, so often I'm around a lot of really good kids who have parents who care. Tonight I was helping out a cub scout meeting with a bunch of bright-eyed, energetic cubs. Two of our older boys, 12-year-olds from the boy scout troop were also helping out. At one point, the kids all went outside with the den leader and another parent to do an activity. This was around 7:30 p.m. and it was dark outside. One of the boy scouts came back inside to get me. He wanted to let me know that they had to move the cubbies away from some "bigger" kids outside. Turns out, there were some 9th graders hanging out at the back of the school building where we meet. They were sitting near the playground, smoking and filling an empty 2-liter soda bottle with smoke, making smoke rings. They weren't particularly noisy, but their language was atrocious. Obviously, we didn't want that example near the little ones.
So I walked over and said to them in a calm voice, "Hey folks, I'm bringing some 2nd graders around here, and I'd like for you to move off the property." They just looked at me with an "I-hate-the-world" look, rolled their eyes and said, "Yeah, sure." Of course, there was no movement. I say, "I've asked you nicely once. You move now. You don't get another warning." One of our scout dads started heading over at that point. He's a big man about 300 pounds. These kids, two boys and a girl, started spewing language you wouldn't want a longshoreman to hear. I'm no prude, and I've done less than bright things as a teenager, and I've paid my dues working with some troubled kids. I wasn't shocked by the language, though, I didn't like it at all.
I did, at one point, say to them, "Look, can you do this at home?" The girl's reply was, "Yeah, my parents aren't old."
That one actually made me laugh. I said to her, "Well, if it's ok to do this at home, then that's a good place to be. You can't be here." She started screeching about how adults just don't show respect to her, and I laughed and said, "I'm sorry you feel that way, really sorry. Because that means you don't understand that you are being treated just the way you are asking me to treat you. In fact, I'm being way more patient than I need to be." I know she didn't understand. Nothing was out of bounds with these kids. The other adult with me made a remark to them about how little he thought of their parents because of their behavior. One overly-brave kid said that his parents were fantastic and let him do whatever he wanted. Yeah. That was pretty obvious. He told us we shouldn't be disrespecting his parents. I told him that I would never want to do that. Would he, therefore, please go home, tell his parents what happened and send them back down to me. I'd be there for the next 30 minutes. No one showed of, of course.
What gets me isn't so much the smoking, the lack of concern about the example they set for the little children nearby, or the language. Certainly, all of that was awful. But the big problem was the complete lack of respect they have for anyone else, especially adults. And as they behaved like obnoxious brats, they preached about how they should be treated with respect! I hear this over and over form kids. If I can get them to actually have a decent dialogue, I usually ask the kids to define respect. They generally give me a correct definition, but that's not what they are asking for. What they really mean when they say that adults don't respect them is, "You won't let me do what I want to do."
So when did parents stop teaching kids these basic rules of conduct, and when did parents forget to really teach children about respect for others and respect for themselves? I'd be absolutely sure the world was going to Hades in a handbasket if it weren't for the really wonderful kids I work with each week. "My" boy scouts are great kids!

Unfortunately, the 12-year-old boy scout who called my attention to the loitering kids saw most of the exchange above. But later he came to me and said, "You know what? Now I know why you are constantly on top of us about our language and our behavior at scouts."
"Really? Why's that?"
"Those kids don't even realize that what they were doing was so awful. They think they have a right to argue and yell and curse. They do it all the time at school, so they think it's o.k. If you were to let us do that all the time, we'd think it was o.k., too."
Now there's a kid who will go far! And it was one of my payoff moments in scouts!
Attention: Anon....website for stepmoms

Anon,


I read your post about your stepson.  I just wanted to let you know that I belong to a wonderful website that allows stepmoms to talk about their issues, give advice, share positives thoughts, vent, etc.  I have learned a lot from the wonderful ladies on there.  Here is the website if your are interested.


www.stepsforstepmothers.com


I blame the parents. Children are not getting the love and attention
xx
Pay close attention to the post above...It is righter than rain!!!
NM
Imagine that men are checking me out? Hardley the case! Starved for attention? Nope just asking a qu
other people's intelligent comments, I was not looking for ignorant assumptions! Starved for attention? Not exactly. Is that a problem that you yourself are facing?

Had you have read all of my posts (OP) you would see that I was only looking for comments from others to see if this was odd behavior or not...and I thanked everyone for their comments regardless of their answers! I was not looking to start a fight here! Please do not be nasty! It is not necessary! We are all adults here!
For an hour after OP, it was no where.
nm
at 3:00 p.m.; CST is one hour behind nm
x
If you think that one little hour or less of planning
These teachers don't get anything done on their planning period, because they're too busy calling parents who won't respond, trying to actually FIND a parent, talking to a student who is obviously having problems at home which is affecting their performance at school. They don't get paid to be a mentor, surrogate mom, social worker, assistance program, etc., but most good teachers do this becaue they genuinely care for their kids. That "planning period" is a joke!
8 Hour Sleep - sorry
should say 8
I can make between 20-26 an hour . nm
x
I was out before 8:30 and spent about an hour
shopping- I do not like to shop at all and mostly this morning bought things for me, like some flannel PJs and some sweaters at the outlet store. The crowd not bad at all- only 1 ahead of me in the checkout. I shop over the net quite a bit but had received flyer and things I wanted I got.
AI was just an hour long
It may have run over by a couple of minutes or so.

$28 an hour, where do we all sign up? NM
.
yep for up to an hour they can still bite you- sm
there was a story on TV a few months back about some guy in the middle of no where, staying at a remote cabin for a week (was getting picked up at pre-arranged date a week after his drop off there), on day 3 or 4 killed a snake by the house by cutting off its head, and then for some foolish reason decided to pick up the head which is when he got bit. By some miracle he did not die, came darn close though, if his ride hadn't come he would have died though.
p.s. it should be a 12-hour fasting
blood test, and then done with the glucola stuff you drink...and checked more than one time. Also, things such as steroids can raise your BS readings. I would just about put money on the fact you are probably seeing a PA...but either way, read up on these things, webmd.com or American Diabetes Association... get informed. Everyone needs to be more proactive on their health.
We have a 48 hour turn on our Paps
x
You are kidding about paying $2 more an hour??
I find most Americans, regardless of their race, creed, religion, etc., etc. wanting to work. I have never had to worry if I hire the Mexicans here in town to work, show them what and your job is done. I have a lady who cleans (black) and I usually have to make a list and even then she wants to sit down most of the time. Have used all but found get my work done with south of the border folks.
20 miles is not far, 1/2 hour drive
if you can stay in his town, for now, and if it's better for the kids, and your first grader is comfortable with people working with him, and it's cheaper, maybe you can go visit your family regularly. A half hour is not far; people drive farther than that one way to work day.

also, it sounds like you agree there was nothing ever in common, it's okay, at least he is caring, and you can remain friends, and he is a good father. It's okay; you'll probably be happier in your own place.
It's a tradition with us! Only have a 1/2-hour ride. nm
s
I am in Lancaster about an hour from you. I just was down to the new Harrahs you have down there to
watch the sulky races.  I have only seen them once in my life and it was pretty nice watching that.  I am not much for slots but I like to watch the horses and I bet a whole $2 on them.  Not much but more fun to watch when you have a favorite picked out.  I never win anything but it is an inexpensive way to spend the afternoon every now and then.  I have only been there once.
nothing-it was an hour of past scenes of

like eric and jessica.......borrrrrrrrrrrrrrriiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnngggggggg.  I watched the feeds last night on Showtime 2 and across the screen it said that earlier in the evening, the Jury house sat with Daniele and ED and asked all kinds of questions and then went into deliberation until tomorrow night....but from the feeds, you wouldn't have known that this occurred - Daniele/ED must have been instructed to not discuss that on the feeds...and they did discuss some of the things that they were not to discuss over the summer last night on the feeds.


 


New Smyrna is nice but it's an hour or so away
We have friends who live in Orlando and New Smyrna is their preferred beach. It's a bit of a drive; we used to drive up and get a room for the night so we could spend the whole day and not have to drive back.
Gain an hour of work.. for me and DH
Both work nights :)
Nope. That's more than an hour's work
if you ask me. And the services won't touch dishes. The one I had broke more stuff than they cleaned properly, so good luck.
And what I do is add a can of Cream of Chicken about an hour before sm
serving to give you a good, thick gravy - it combines the juices of the turkey plus the good taste of the soup. No one can ever tell how I got the gravy so thick and tasty (over home-made mashed potatoes) but the trick is that instead of flour or corn starch!
a 4-hour visit? i don't think i could tolerate something like that
:)
Too much - how bout once every half hour or so
Drives me insane, although things have gotten so bad here were we live (crime wise) and peoples home are being broken into while they sleep so I sleep at night and he sleeps in the day/afternoon. But when he is awake he comes out of his room every half hour or so to tell me the latest in news/events. It drives me absolutely crazy.
But it's better than it used to be. However, I do love my time when he's sleeping.
I had a 30-hour gallbladder attack, and
it was rough. I'd just been diagnosed with stones and then had the attack. I had to wait a few days before my scheduled surgery.

My surgeon told me his story. His abdominal pain started and 3 hours later, he was checked and his GB was already gangrenous. What if yours is?
I live about an hour off the Gulf....sm
in south Mississippi. That is pretty funny but some of it is true.