drinking for 2 years is not trying it out
Posted By: s/m on 2008-06-30
In Reply to: Thank you for the advice. sm - worried
Your daughter is headed down the wrong path. If she's been smoking for 2 years, she's not trying that out anymore, either. Apparently, both of these new habits "fit" and she's taking them home. The fact that she says she feels relieved not having to hide it anymore is a sure sign she has no intention of quitting. I strongly urge you to discipline her. Children need discipline. She may hate you for it now, but your job is to be her mother, not her friend. Both of these habits carry dire consequence over the long-term (which I'm sure you are aware of) and both of these habits only get worse over time.
Yes, I tried alcohol and cigarettes when I was 16 (no drugs) but only a couple of times. To this day, I still don't like the taste of beer and never drank any other alcohol until I was over 21. When my mom/dad found out what I was doing, I was severely disciplined - grounded, spanked (yes I said spanked at 16), and was stripped of any privileges. This definitely deterred me from participating in these things after I was allowed to resume a normal life. This may sound harsh, but I'm thankful today my parents put an end to it when they did. I intend to do the same with my children. I think that's the problem with a lot of today's youth -- they're parents are too worried about being their friend, instead of doing their job as a parent.
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And the drinking age is....
This might have changed since my kids were growing up. When the kids and I visited Jamaica, no drinking age there and so my 15 year old son was allowed to drink, even his much younger sister could order from a bar but in the US the age was 21 and so that was what I expected out of them. I personally would hold any parents legally responsible for letting under aged kids drink at their home. I am too much of a stickler for the laws of the land.
husband's drinking
I think, from what I have read, is that he can only help himself in stopping. Has to hit bottom....after AA and being sober would be the time for your support. I think by staying with him now you will be co-inabling. He knows you are there, so he probably feels "so what, she's still here and I'm still drinking". He has to want to stop, until then he won't. Remember, it is a disease, and it can't be cured, but can be taken "one day at a time". Best of luck.
What is Nicki drinking?
I know she is drinking the drink that David drugged, but it looks like white wine or champagne. WTH? It certainly dosesn't look like sparkling water or whatever the recovering alcoholic normally drinks.
I would not drive after drinking it!
Use in place of wine:)
drinking soda
I think that drinking soda aggravates that. Cranberry juice and herbals teas calm this sort of thing down for me.
Legal Drinking Age
Many of the states that have chosen to specifically prohibit alcohol consumption by those under age 21 have a variety of exceptions. For example,
Some States allow an exception for consumption when a family member consents and/or is present. States vary widely in terms of which relatives may consent or must be present for this exception to apply and in what circumstances the exception applies. Sometimes a reference is made simply to "family" or "family member" without further elaboration.
....
Some States allow an exception for consumption on private property. States vary in the extent of the private property exception which may extend to all private locations, private residences only, or in the home of a parent or guardian only. In some jurisdictions, the location exception is conditional on the presence and/or consent of the parent, legal guardian, or legal-age spouse.
Some States also allow exceptions for educational purposes (e.g., students in culinary schools), religious purposes (e.g., sacramental use of alcoholic beverages), or medical purposes.
http://www2.potsdam.edu/hansondj/LegalDrinkingAge.html
if he quits drinking and changes for the better, you have your answer
nm
Lowering the legal drinking age from 21 to 18
I didn't know this was going on.....
The article is long so I didn't copy all of it. See the link below:
College presidents from about 100 of the nation's best-known universities, including Duke, Dartmouth and Ohio State, are calling on lawmakers to consider lowering the drinking age from 21 to 18, saying current laws actually encourage dangerous binge drinking on campus.
The movement called the Amethyst Initiative began quietly recruiting presidents more than a year ago to provoke national debate about the drinking age.
"This is a law that is routinely evaded," said John McCardell, former president of Middlebury College in Vermont who started the organization.
"It is a law that the people at whom it is directed believe is unjust and unfair and discriminatory."
Drinking 9-12 beers a day means he is
No, sure donot see that. Was he drinking the beer
on the unicycle? LOL
Try drinking 8 glasses of water a day...(SM)
I just spoke with a friend whose husband was advised by his doctort to drink a lot of water for his back problem. He did and it worked and he feels better overall. Could be the bones in your feet are dry and building up with calcium.
My daughter was drinking heavily, she didn't know that I knew but she would
act strange and when I would try to come close to her casually, she would pull away. I waited til she fell asleep and could smell the booze on her breath. The next day I told her I would buy lunch if she could go grab it and when she left I went in her room and found to stashed bottle of some cheap rum. I know it sounds bad but I put some ipecac in the bottle and then waited. I didn't put much, but it was effective. She blew chunks and blew and blew. She thought she just got sick, but about a week later I did it again and after she got sick that time, that was the end of her drinking. Smart girl, eh? She somehow figured out that drinking rum made her sick! I may sound like a terrible mom, but I also don't have a drunk for daughter now either.
Red Cross told me excessive tea drinking could cause anemia.
o
Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit drinking.
Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit smoking.
Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue.
Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines
Try drinking lots of water today, bet you feel at least nm
x
It's the other guy's wife that's strange. I can see guys drinking, watching
xx
I would have called the police right from the start, especially with underage drinking.
the mother could be brought up on charges of furnishing aldohol to minors for starters. Don't put up with it for another minute. The police will not tell who called, they just show up on the door step and take care of business.
Good luck.
EXCUSE ME! Smoking and/or drinking does not make you a bad parent! sm
I smoke. I drink margaritas when I choose too. This does not have any effect on how I raise my children. One is a straight A student. The third is an average student. Then I have my 21yo who is excelling in the nursing program and just told me tonight I was a great mom no matter how she used to argue with me, which she did and regularly. Smoking and/or drinking does not play a role in life unless you are an alcoholic. Just because someone drinks, they are not and guess what... they can still be a mom/dad and raise wonderful children.
If you want to pick something that is wrong, how about a church that teaches children to fast when they are only 11 and already underweight (not mine but a friend's). That is more wrong.
It is just like drinking Coors light determines you will have a boy baby and Miller Lite a girl. sm
I have heard that actually; however, it is not true.
I did hear that too much Mountain Dew makes one impotent!
Don't know who dreams this stuff up, but I would have to say it is not true at all. My hubby only drinks Coors Light and we have a boy and a girl, go figure! LOL
My husband is 7.5 years younger. Been together almost 20 happy years...nm
nm
My feelings; people shacking up together for years and years
and then all of a sudden deciding to get married don't need a thing, obviously. A shower should not even be given. I lived with my now husband a while (nowadays who doesn't!) before we married and I also had been married before years ago but he was not....so of course HIS mom wanted a shower. I told her absolutely not unless it was just the immediate family, his mom, sisters, etc, more like a celebration/get together. And so that's what we did. Showers are tacky, period. Unless it's a couple of young kids getting married straight out of the house and that doesn't happen much anymore.
Been with a man 13 years older, now with a man 4 years younger.
Younger is better, at least in my case ;)
Sorry, meant 75 cents. Still, that was years and years ago.
xx
I studied to be a scopist years and years ago
Back in the early 1990s I took a course called Note reader Scopist. They read court reporter notes (those long skinny papers that looks like a cash receipt) and types them into documents. I had found the course through something called At Home Professions but just didn't finish it because it was too expensive for me. But I am familiar with them and even found my book from the first course I took. Looking back I think it would have been a blast if I had kept up with it.
It is definitely legitimate. A lot has changed since the early 90s, so I'm not too familiar with the industry now. I do remember what was really weird was it didn't take a lot for me to learn it. For instance I could look at a line of court notes and see something that looked like: NV p srn - and I seemed to know exactly what it said. Just weird. My DH used to say that I understood it because I was an alien and my ship crashed in Roswell. HA HA HA Anyway...that's what I know about it. But if you Google note reader scopist or at home professions i'm sure you could probably find a lot of info.
I have been vegetarian on/off for 35 years, was vegan for about 5 years sm
not that hard. Right now, I am having so many issues with food allergies and celiac disease, having to give up nightshade veggies...nothing left to eat. I am eating some meat now, but not when the gastroparesis sets in!
Being vegan is not hard...unless you are a celiac. This is how I figured out the celiac part because so many of the meat analogs and vegan packaged foods use gluten for the protein and I got really sick from it. I gave up all the premade things and the whole grains with gluten and I was fine.
There is vegan and then there is VE-GAN. By definition, vegans don't wear, use or consume anything that is derived of animals...no leather shoes, most shampoos and toothpastes are off the list, as are deodorants. No wool or silk. Anything with soap usually has animal byproducts. It is very involved and rather difficult to do.
Giving up meat, eggs and dairy is no big deal, except for cheese. You hear that ad about "comfort proteins" in a baby formula and there is such a thing. Mother's milk, be it human, cow, goat, whatever...contains a chemical that triggers the release of endorphins in the brain so that feeding feels good in more ways than one. The purpose of this is ensure that the nursed young want to nurse and thrive. Human milk has a lot of these, so does cow's milk and cow juice triggers the same reaction in the adult human brain. Cheese is concentrated milk and therefore these chemicals are also concentrated. As a result, cheese is an addictive substance. This is the hardest thing to give up when going vegan. Vegan cheese substitutes are nasty and they don't melt. If a dairy-free cheese melts, it contains casein, an animal protein and not vegan.
I studied this years and years and years ago
Most definitely is legitimate. In the late 1980s I studied to be a note reader scopist through a group called At Home Professions. I loved it, but unfortunately could not continue due to no funds. It was reading the court reporters notes which looked like a grocery receipt with a bunch of letters scattered on it. The weird thing was I found it extremely easy. For instance I would see a line that looked like: av e cr, and for some reason I would know what it said. My DH told me that's because I'm an alien and my ship landed in Roswell. HA HA. Well I know that a lot has changed, after all it's been over 20 years since I took the first course and know a lot of it is computerized now, but it is most definitely legitimate and I've heard people like to do it. I think I remember one of the courses was in medical terminology and another course was in legal terminology. Should be able to find a lot of it on google, or maybe go to your local college if they offer it and talk to an instructor.
This has happened for years and years, where have you been?
Frank Sinatra, Elvis, the Beatles, and on and on. This person is acting very normal like the age she is. You would have to have been under a rock to think differently, like this was an abnormal behavior....
Lost my mom 23 years ago and dad 18 years ago.
My son was not even 1 when my mom died....she was only 50. My dad died at age 59. So even though I feel your pain....I would have been very grateful to have them into their 80's. I guess we take what we get and be thankful. Sometimes it is hard though.
I was married for 13 years and 2 years
after my divorce I met the most incredible man. He was also divorced, we both have 2 kids, and though we are not married, we have been together for 9 years. They are still out there, you may have to go through a few marginal ones before you find him, but they are out there and available.
Was your kid almost THREE years old?
tt
I am and have been for 3-1/2 years....sm
feel free to e-mail me any questions you may have and I'll answer the best I can. For me, foster parenting has been a very rewarding experience.
this years
x
I had it done 5 years ago.
The good: Surgery went well. Lost from 420 pounds down to 175.
The bad: Became depressed, lost my hair, damaged a kidney, and eventually gained the weight back. Weight 350 pounds now.
If you can't change your habits now, you probably won't change it then either.
Only 5% of those who lose weight (even with surgery) keep it off.
DH had one about 5 years ago....
It was a breeze for him, and only a $10 copay! He tried to be macho though and lift something pretty heavy 2 days later, ended up home for about 4 days and pretty sore! All in all everything has been A-OK, he has never had a problem. Didn't slow him down any either, he is still quite the man, if you know what I mean! LOL! Good luck, hope it works out for you.
We do...even after 21 years.
About 17 years ago,
I had an ex-boyfriend that owed them money. Don't know if he was buying it or selling it, and never had heard of them before that, or since then.
WW as of 2 years
I did WW 2 years ago. They have 2 plans, the core and flex. I did the flex. It is a point system. Basically you eat anything you want. You keep a diary of what you eat and add up the points at the end of the day. The points was based on the number of calories, amount of fat and fiber I think too. I don't know anything about the core plan. I did loose weight the 3 weeks I was there. I went from 196 to 189. I quit when I got pregnant and never went back. I would love to go back but I don't think I would get much out of a meeting anymore. I have a 5 year old that gets bored and a 16 month-old that won't sit still. I think the cost back then was $11 a week.
Had it when I was 11 years old. sm
I really cannot remember how long I had it before I was diagnosed, seemed to last a looong time though. Mine started out with one lesion on my torso, which itched but would feel like someone was stabbing me if I touched it... even if my SHIRT touched it! All of the lesions were very painful, but I remember that one most because it got infected. Turned a grayish green and oozed. I still have a large scar from it. Hope you feel better soon. It is very painful.
I took it for about 10 years.
I just changed to Effexor. Ten mg is an extremely low dose. To keep migraines and neck/shoulder tightness under control I needed 20. But 50 mg, even though that's still a pretty low dose, could cause daytime drowsiness for me. Other people might take 100 mg, I believe. And at 50 mg there was a little weight gain, also. If you still have trouble, you might try melatonin also. I hope you're feeling better soon.
I don't think 8 years is all that much, I think it would be a lot of fun!
x
My SIL had it done about 1 1/2 years ago; had no ...
real problems; lost about 125 pounds. I also know a guy who had it about 2 years ago and has lost about 175 pounds. He really has not had problems either. You really have to research the doctor, though, and a lot of people have had problems with it.
BF for 6 years
Also does not make me a crazed lunatic, either - as many of you have alluded to - you would be very surprised if you met me on the street - I look just as normal as any of you - only probably slimmer and with larger natural breasts - and remember large areolas (LOL)
Yes you can. I have done it for 20+ years, my mom
did it for 40+ years. I usually use parchment paper now, but before I knew about it I always used wax paper. I have never had a problem with wax on cookies or cakes and there has been no taste difference. Even some of the pre-modern cooking shows used to tell you to use wax paper on the bottom of your ringed cake pan.
The Wonder Years
I remember them well! Great suggestions above. What a great mom, and what a great son! Enjoy it!
When it comes to digging a bit deeper in those pockets, that's your cue: time for son to get a job and start pitching in!
I had them when I was 45 years old.
I had the Invisaligns, though, and those were great. You could eat anything because you took them out while eating, then brushed your teeth and popped them back in.
They were more expensive than conventional braces, but not by that much...and LOTS less noticeable.
Thanks, but I already get those. Been going for 4 years now.
:-)
Ten years old nm
She turned 10 on 06/03
The cat is about 3 years old sm
and is considerably overweight. We are working wtih the vet on that. I don't know if he just can't or has ever even tried. Our other cat goes over the fence all the time.
9 YEARS?!!!
Wow, my dear, you are dedicated.
I went through this sort of thing with my husband about 3 years ago. He was over-reacting, taking everything out on us, constantly talking down to me and screaming at the kids over every single little thing. After being utterly miserable for at least a year while things went from bad to worse, I kicked him out.
Now, three years later, he is a completely different man. Losing his entire family (we moved 600 miles away within a week of me telling him to leave) really impacted him, and, honestly, he hit complete rock-bottom - drinking, flaking on the kids for visitation, just being an all-around mess. And, you know what? One day he woke up and decided he needed to make a change or kill himself. So he changed.
We got back together in November, and I'm currently 6 months pregnant with our third child. There are times when he does slip back into old behavior patterns, but he recognizes it and stops and apologizes. They need to realize that it IS just a trained reaction, and it is possible to retrain your reactions, but he HAS to want it. Are you willing to wait for him to make that decision on his own? Can your mental health and/or your children's mental health handle it?
I know people are too quick to jump into divorce nowadays, but you have to ask yourself if staying is ultimately more harmful to both you and your kids - think about the role model you're being. I didn't want my kids growing up to think it's okay to walk all over their families because they've had a bad day, so I took action. I loved him desperately, so it was probably the hardest thing I'd ever done, but, in the long run, everything worked out like it should. 
I was 13 years old
and playing Monopoly with my best friend when her mother came into the room sobbing and told us that Elvis was dead. Of course, being insensitive 13 year olds, we thought it was funny she was so upset and just laughed at her.
over the years
Just as clothing sizes have changed, so have shoe sizes over the past years. What was once a size 5 it is now a size 7 - and so on - the what was once a size 14 dress is now near the size of a 10.
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