been there, walked out and sm
Posted By: wondering on 2008-12-17
In Reply to: Yes it has all crossed my mind. Have you been in this situation before? (sm) - anon
didn't look back lady. There is help out there if you want it. What do you think domestic violence shelters are for? Why do you think these morons do this stuff? BECAUSE THEY GET AWAY WITH IT! If you stay, your son should be taken from you. I am not nswering you anymore. You obviously do not want out. some women just like drama!
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I think mom is getting walked all over.....nm
X
oh and YOU have walked in her shoe(s)????....
How often does he get walked and for how long?
I watch a lot of Cesar Milan's shows. One of the things that I always notice is when he has a dog like yours a big part of the problem is the dog is not getting out enough or for long enough time. Not saying this is the case with you, but that's what I've observed on his show.
You have to start when you get his leash out and reach for the door. Never let him run in front of you. If you watch The Dog Whisperer, the dogs he's working with are always on a very short lead. They never walk in front of him. When your dog starts to get excited, make him sit and calm down. Then put the leash on him. Don't let him go out the door in front of you. That's letting him be the pack leader and you need to be the pack leader. Hold him back and make him stop - as calmly as you can - and then walk out the door with him at the same time. The same goes for the actual walk. When he starts to pull on the leash, stop and make him sit down. He'll figure out pretty fast that pulling is a bad thing. At least this works when Cesar does it.
http://www.cesarmillaninc.com/tips/basics_masteringwalk.php
I'm walking in your shoes, but I walked further
There is only so much you can do. If she is a danger to herself or others, you can get an involuntary committment from a court to have her placed in a psych ward. It depends on your state how many witnesses you need and how far gone she is.
My dd stays with her dad (my ex) and I have had to cut off all ties. She finally got into a methadone program and got a job (which she quit when she got a garnishment on her paycheck for past-due child support) and is going to the local county health department where she was placed on a mood stabilizer. Every time I have talked with her over the past year, it seems she is worse than the time before. I don't think she is on the right meds. I have had to cut off all contact with her because I am raising her child and I just do not have the energy to be everything to everyone.
Like your child, my dd was depressed - I even saw it starting at about the age of 9 months. She was cycling in manic/hypomanic moods by the time she was 7 years old, only back then we didn't know what it was. We just thought she was high strung and spoiled. When she was 11, a close friend of hers from school committed suicide and she began self-mutilation. At the age of 14, she got kicked out of several psychologists offices because she lied and manipulated them. She lived on the streets in New Orleans at the age of 15 and it took us a year to find her. She finally came home with her boyfriend so she could get off the street and promptly got pregnant. She was "okay" while she was pregnant, but after the baby was born and the guy left, she got into drugs. OxyContin is her drug of choice. She chose that life including stealing her dad's credit cards and lots of other things I would be ashamed to post in public. She chose that over her child. I am now raising that child and I don't see things getting better even with all the "help" she is getting.
I'm sorry you are going through this, but one thing I do know is this: If you keep giving her money, a place to stay, food to eat, clothes to wear, she will NOT have any personal motivation to get better. She can sell the food and clothes for drugs. She can use the money for drugs. She will use you until you are all used up, and then what good will you be when she finds she really needs you for something important, like making different choices for her life? I wish you all the best. I know how heartbreaking this is for you. Funny thing is, I get okay with not having a relationship with her until I talk to her, then I fall apart for a few days and have to disconnect again to keep going ahead with my own life. So for me, I have to allow her to make her own choices even if it means that one day soon I could be attending her funeral.
I'll do it. I walked him last night
along with Sasha. He is not a big puller, a bit of a wanderer and sniffer, but he was happy to follow Sasha's lead and all of my gentle directions, which is fantastic! There is no need to give strong corrections to this dog. When we came to a corner and had to turn right and cross the street, I told Sasha, GEE (which means turn right in musher's terms), and she instantly turned right. To my surprise, Cedric instantly followed her. To me this means that he is very happy to have strong leadership and has no need to be a dominant dog (although as Cesar Milan says, if a dog feels a void in leadership, he will always try to take over and fill the position). So for this reason and the other training I have started and seen quick improvement, this is going to be a very easily trainable dog. Yay!
I agree! My BP & I have walked out of restaurants without paying (sm)
if the mgr. wouldn't ask the people with a screaming baby or out-of-control toddlers (running around & actually eating off of other people's plates! Gaaack!)to do something about it. At movie theaters, if people bring screamers in with them, we go out to the mgr. and ask for our money back. My mom raised 6 kids and went to church with all of them every Sunday. If anyone (including the infant-du-jour) made any noise, they were removed immediately. Older kids had to sit in the car (with H*-to-pay when we returned home!), and babies/toddlers sat with her outside 'til such time that they calmed down again. And weddings? Forget it! She never subjected any of her friends' weddings to small children or babies. And we were trained, at at APPROPRIATE age and ONE AT A TIME, how to behave in restaurants. We had to use our "indoor voices", keep our napkin in our lap & our elbows off the table, and eat with the correct forks, etc. And in fancy restaurants, we were trained beforehand that we were NOT allowed to even ASK for a hamburger. That alone prevents many restaurant-meltdown scenes!
Shoulda walked over and said,"Here, honey. Let me
x
wow? You're a whole lot nicer than I am. He finally got the hint when I walked right past sm
him and didn't glance his way once. I'm so bad, but who in the world wants to be intimate after typing on colonoscopies where a patient was not properly prepped?! OR on a patient whose genitalia is basically inside out and she's having every ectomy, otomy, and repair known to mankind?
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