a believer in God, personal relationship with God
Posted By: not into ANY organized religion today, by choice!. on 2007-04-09
In Reply to: I have - ANON
My spirituality comes from many places...
Mother Teresa said:
People are often unreasonable and self-centered. FORGIVE THEM ANYWAY.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of ulterior motives. BE KIND ANYWAY.
If you are honest, people may cheat you. BE HONEST ANYWAY.
If you find happiness, people may be jealous. BE HAPPY ANYWAY.
The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow. DO GOOD ANYWAY.
Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough. GIVE YOUR BEST ANYWAY.
For you see, in the end, it is between you and God. IT NEVER WAS BETWEEN YOU AND THEM ANYWAY.
-----------
And that, my fellow MTs/MEs, is something we all should contemplate!
Have a GREAT week!!!
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I'm a believer....
I did the music for my best friends wedding. Their dance was to Rascal Flatts - The Broken Road. She was 49 and he 46. They had a beautiful backyard wedding with about 150 people. We chose a beautiful wedding march done on harp, a Yani song while the wedding party came in, "I do" by Mark Wills while they lit the candles, which seems like it took for ever. When they were finally through and the preacher introduced them as Mr. & Mrs., I played Smashmouth's version of "I'm a Believer" as they came back up the isle. Yes the Shrek version! It was absolutely hilarious. "I thought love was only true in fairytales". She had on a full white gown with train. The maid of honor grabbed the train and threw it over the brides arm and the bride reached down and grabbed her dress up at one side and she and the groom danced crazily back down the isle. We had kept it a secret and nobody was expecting it and it was an absolute hoot. Really put everybody in a good mood! If you want something to break the seriousness, it works. It was so much fun. Made me wish I had done the Monkey's version when I got married.
Etta James -- At Last
Valentine - Martina McBride
A site with some good selections of fast and slow attached.
Believer
Whether it is true or not, you have to put merit into what your 6yo believes is true and that he is coming to you for help and to feel safe.
I don't believe in letting kids sleep in the parent's bedroom but that's a matter of opinion on how to handle a situation and only you know your child.
Personally, when I was 15 I lost someone in my immediate family. Who knows if this was a psychological thing or real but I felt that I saw that person a few days after their death in the middle of the night and that they tucked me in bed. What I can tell you is that it was (and still is in memory) very real to me. In a way it was a comforting feeling, in another it was a bit frightening. For a while I slept in my sister's room but eventually everything went back to normal. Find what will work to make him more comfortable, maybe a flashlight in bed or 2 night lights, you to stay until he falls asleep, a special blanket or stuff animal.
Having a pet is a personal choice and it should be kept on personal property
nm
I am a total believer and do believe that
kids see things before they are old enough to think they are not supposed to. I still will smell my dad's aftershave every so often. I just think of it as he is coming around to see how I am doing. (My BF thinks I am crazy by the way.)
How is your relationship with God? If not God, do you have sm
any spirituality in your life at all? I was exactly where you were....then I found Jesus. Late in life. He has given me purpose and pure contentment.
Nothing satisfies like Jesus and I've done it all: Alcoholism, rx drugs, bad relationships, etc.
Now I'm teaching a Bible study class, have a thriving marriage (after a horrible divorce) and am just very, very peaceful and happy.
Whenever someone like you comes to me with thoughts just like yours, I tell them about God and His saving grace. Will pray for you that you find the contentment you are so searching for.
relationship help
My fiance and I live together - been together 4 years - living together 3 months - supposed to get married this year. . Most of the time, everything is great. He gets stressed out about finances, makes a rude remark to me about my lack of house cleaning ability, I get mad and go off by myself for a few hours - he gets even madder and starts saying our relationship is over, etc. . He leaves for several hours, comes home and we make up. . I am having a hard time with this. . I feel like I have to react a certain way or this whole blow up is going to happen. . I love him and know he loves me - I just don't understand how something so small can turn into something so big. . Anyone with any advice?
MIL-SIL relationship has nothing to do with
SIL's feelings for the daughter, just like MIL's feelings for him have nothing to do with her feelings for her daughter.
relationship
Is this how you want your life to be because he will not change even if he decides he is "ready" to marry you. Everything he does now he will continue to do. You definitely deserve better. Good luck.
she was in control of that relationship
x
Yes, your relationship will change sm
The first three months or so you will both be so tired you won't know how you can possibly make it, but you will. If you have family close by to help, that is great (I was an Air Force wife, so we were far from both our families). Hopefully, though, you will start to see your husband in a whole new light. I know I did. He had never had much use for children before, although I knew he loved animals, so that's always a good sign. He would spend hours playing with our cats, and he loved to sit and watch TV with one or both of the cats in his lap. To me, that showed a loving heart.
He had a lot of learning to do, but he became a wonderful father. Seeing that, I fell in love with him all over again. He became much more open emotionally, primarily with our son, but some of that spilled over into our relationship as well. And having a child together bonds a couple together like nothing else. Here is this wonderful being who is a part of BOTH of you, and who you both love like you never thought you could love another human being.
Sure, there will be difficulties. There will be times when he wants sex and you are so exhausted all you want to do is sleep for a week. There will be times when you are so focused on the baby you won't realize you are neglecting him. But if you are aware of all these possibilities, you are less likely to let the situation go on so long that it becomes a problem.
Good luck to you, whatever happens. 
The whole relationship should have been a no-brainer
Frankly, I thought he should have been given more punishment myself, but I don't think the DA/ADA really put a lot of effort into it. As I mentioned, they were going to accept the SIS until I pointed out that I didn't approve on the basis that it's not like another conviction would be destroying a lily-white record, at which point the ADA flipped through the file and said, "Wow, this guy belongs in jail." Going into it, the 'scoop' on the judge were that the 3 things he hated most were drunks, deadbeat dads, and woman-hitters, and the ex was the trifecta (he's about $1100 behind in his child support), but somehow he got to skate away. I do have mixed feelings about the sentence; I wasn't really injured, but on the other hand that was only because I called before it got worse.
I have my own share of self-esteem issues, which is why I stuck it out as long as I did. The only thing Dr. Phil ever said that made sense to me was, "We generate the reality we think we deserve." So I'm spending some quality time channeling Stuart Smalley and doing my self-affirmations, have blocked his phone, and am generating my new reality.
re the relationship with your daughter...
My sister-in-law, a wonderful woman, has a 30-something daughter, and she is struggling with their relationship. She has recently decided to let things go for a while - for her own sanity. She tells me that there have been problems with their relationship since her daughter was just a child. It pains her to think that she may never have a good relationship with her. My sister-in-law has 2 other children that she has a wonderful relationship with. I think, sadly enough, that sometimes it just works out that way. We have discussed the possibility of her daughter having psychiatric/emotional issues that could be hindering the relationship process - I don't know whether or not that could be an issue with your daughter. The bottom line is, in my opinion, you can only do what you can do. I don't think a parent should EVER give up on their children, but there may come a time when you have to realize that it is what it is, and you just have to accept that and worry about taking care of yourself. Good luck to you.
Dont know where your relationship has gone wrong but
my husband and I have been married now for 7 years and he is feely, smoochy, kind, considerate, loving, can have a grab each and any time he wants it. I thank my lucky stars to have found him at my late age. I dont know what has turned the love to disgust for you but I do not feel normally this would be a turnoff for most women, certainly not me. My love just deepens every minute we are together. I will say that I have an ole high school friend (this is her second marriage) that says identical things as you are saying. She and the fellow have no children together but frankly, I would not stay because of the children, never. Your children will suffer in a situation like this. My children grown when I met the present husband but I was divorced, raised the children and would not subject them to more unpleasantness. I think my friend and her husband will come to divorce eventually. Just do not believe you can overcome the disgust when it should be pure heaven by his touch.
I agree - no kids, why do they have to have a relationship?
nm
does anyone besides me have a bad relationship with a grown daughter or son?
with one of your grown-up kids, or is it only me? My oldest daughter and I do not get along, never did. I love her, but am not sure if I like her. She is very selfish and self centered and it's all about her. Everyone else see's it but her. Of course, there's a lot more to it, but last night she sent me a letter saying basically she's done with me.....not sure at all where this is coming from. I really, really don't need this right now. So, is anyone else in any kind of a similar situation with an adult child? She's 38.
I'm so glad you have that type of relationship! That's how it should be. (sm)
She has every opportunity to come here and let them get to know her and then they would probably be happier going to her house. She is always so busy every time they see her. I would love for them to want to go to her house. It is so ridiculous for people to say it is me influencing them.
Death of someone you have a close relationship
even if they are not related by blood.
In 1990, my husband and I decided for the first time since we had been married to spend Thanksgiving with his family instead of with my family (we always did a Sunday Thanksgiving with his family before because my family was so large and his family was smaller).
My father died that Thanksgiving night. It took me 10 years to forgive myself for not being there that day. I have empathy for anyone who suffers a loss around a holiday, but hey, that's just me.
I'm glad they have a good relationship, too, but it's NOT
superficial to know your spouse's past history including his education. Why be so secretive about something so mundane? Is she going to love him any less (or more) whether he did or didn't finish high school - probably not. Is it going to change how he treats her now if she knows - probably not. Even if it changed everything about their relationship, she's still his wife, and to not know his education level after 30+ years of knowing each other is just a wee bit strange to me. Once again, in my opinion, he's supposed to be her best friend, her confidante, the one person in the world she can trust anything to. Why the evasiveness? JMO 
I feel so sorry for you. Please rethink your relationship with this man.
.
Long Distance relationship
I think you answered your own question without realizing it. You still want to see new places, experience something new. To move back would mean you would probably never get to do those things...they are dreams you have, don't live your life wishing you had done what you wanted to do. Great relationships are easy to have when there are so many miles between you, when you are living together everyday it will be a whole different situation. Right now you have so little time together you make sure those few hours are perfect or as close to it as they can be. If you stay in this LD relationship you can still move someplace else and see exciting things, you will just find a way to see each other from another location.
What would you do if you got a fantastic, once in a lifetime, can't turn it down opportunity for something tomorrow, would you take it or would you throw that chance away to move back home where you don't really want to be? When you answer that question you will have your answer.
Are you considering a long-term relationship
with this gentleman? If so, you might want to give some serious thought to his money issues as they could very well become your money issues.
His joke was probably just an attempt to be funny, though rather clumsy and thoughtless. Since it bothers you, you could discuss it with him and tell him why it made you angry and base your next move on his response.
It would be his actual money issues that would be of greatest concern to me.
I mean:..'not a very close relationship....nm
nm
once the trust is gone, so is the love, and the relationship..sm
be completely honest with him..now, before he gets out of rehab. If he is doing it only for you or to get you back, it is never going to work and it is just a matter of time before HE feels comfortable enough to start drinking again. You sound pretty sure that you want it to be over, so see a lawyer and start divorce proceedings now. don't wait for him to get out and start things all over again. You have to be up front about YOUR feelings, as well. Do not lead him on thinking there is hope. If telling him how you feel puts him back into drinking again, that is his problem and not yours. It would only serve to prove that he was not serious about stopping drinking anyway, and helping himself, but only a means to get back into your life. Do not take on the guilt. He is responsible for his ownself, and you are responsible for you. But do not let his expectations of coming back go on any longer. He has a right to know how you feel now, before it is too late. You already know in your heart that things will go back to the way they were before, if you let him come back. Show him how serious you are, be honest, and start the actions you need to extricate yourself from the situation. He will not change.. trust me on that one. I have been there too.
y huby and have pretty much the same kind of relationship as you mg
We have both learned where our strengths and weaknesses are. When our children were toddlers and it was bedtime I began losing my patience. Their constant getting up and fighting sleep didn't seem to bother him, so he handled bedtime. We share homework duties, I do the laundry and most of the cooking, he and the children clean up after dinner. He likes to cook on Sundays. It has been working great for 19 years.
Well, any healthy relationship should be close to equal
My husband works FT and still helps out a lot around the house. I only work PT, so I usually do the cooking, helping our daughter with homework and most of the cleaning. My husband always cleans the kitchen after I cook (and vice versa) though and he cleans the bathrooms. We also alternate doing the laundry. So, I'd say everything evens out to be pretty close to 50/50 in our relationship. We are truly best friends and we treat each other as such, and I would never dream of "serving" my man - that's just a ridiculous statement! I even had that part taken out of our wedding vows! If it becomes a problem where you feel like you're being taken advantage of, then you need to sit down with your husband and let him know that he needs to pull his own weight or you won't be happy. Good luck!
Anyone had a relationship with a person in jailr or prison?
Is it someone you knew or have you gotten to know them since they went to prison? Do you write them or visit?
I have a love/hate relationship with the thing.
Keeps me roasty toasty...In that picture there the wind chill put the temperature to -25, the kind of cold where your eyes steam and then that steam frosts your lashes up. It's very dangerous.
HOWEVER, these coverall things are designed for dudes with no curves, so the crotch winds up going down to your knees and you wind up walking like a penguin. I have wiped out in it and I feel like the blueberry girl from Willy Wonka where they have to roll her away.
No way, no day would you find me in California or anywhere outside of New England. It's best I don't venture too far away from my mental health care providers, know what I'm sayin?
I just some at Tractor Supply I've got my eye on (Man, I'm such a hick!) that are actually specifically tailored for women, so a set of those are on my wish list along with that split keyboard.
Can you close the door on your relationship and not look back? sm
Of course, you will need to be in touch for the sake of the children, but you as a person need to be able to look back and have no *what ifs* to ponder about. You need to know in your head you have turned over every stone and mustered every bit of strength in your possession and tried everything you possibly could before you end this. Otherwise, it will forever sit like a huge weight on your back and make it hard on in life. You also need to be able to speak about your husband in an objective manner for the sake of the children. I agree with the other poster who suggested counseling for the children. Please consider that no matter what else you decide for yourself. Oh, how I do wish my parents had done the same for me as a child. Their relationship has left me with wounds so easily reinjured and made some things in life very tough for me. Best wishes to you.
relationship question, pls need confirmation/advice
A younger (like 20 years younger) has fallen for me. He knows what he wants in life; tired of the young girls who play the mind games, etc. What are our chances of having a good relationship together. I am definitely attracted to younger men always.
Thanks for any advice or any experience you may have.
long distance relationship - dead end?
I've been in a long distance relationship for over a year now. About 1000 miles apart....we see each other once a month and it's great for the most part. We miss each other a lot, talk everyday, and almost never fight. We get along great and truly prioritize and look forward to our meetings.
Our only problem is....the long distance thing has no end in site. Neither of us are planning (or willing) to relocate to the other's location just yet. He feels that I should 'come home' back to where our friends and family are, where we both grew up.....I feel he should get out and experience new things while we are young.
I still want to see new places, maybe move again, experience something new again, and am simply not ready (if ever) to move back. So what should I do? Bite the bullet and move back? Does this mean we have reached an impasse that will not work? Sometimes I worry that we are on a dead end road, but I could not imagine splitting because we have such a great relationship.
ANY relationship based on lies is doomed to failure
Your relationship is truly blessed and an inspiration to others. Congrats and Love long! :) nm
s
Normal nerves, BUT you and your relationship w/hubs will change & evolve, hopefully
s
Sent you a personal msg. nm
s
A little personal but
when my hubby and I want some "alone time" the dog can't stand to be in the room. If we don't realize the dog is in the room and we close the door, he lays at the door and cries to be let out.
I have nothing personal....
against pit bulls in particular. I think all dogs can be dangerous given different circumstances. I don't think it is right to single out a particular breed and just take away an animal from its home without just cause.
However, my elderly mother, who suffers from MS, has been plagued by horrible neighbors with many dogs. They do not keep their dogs in their own yard. Not only do they tear out my mother's trash, but they use her back yard as their own personal bathroom. Their one dog bit their own daughter and nothing was done. They are always barking at us when we are in my mother's yard. I had one come at me and I picked up a shovel that was thankfully near me to protect myself if the dog continued it advance. Their little dog frequently gets under my mother's feet and her balance is not good due to her age and medical issues. We have called the Humane Society and they will do nothing.
I personally think that people should have a right to shoot any dog on their property that shouldn't be there. If it weren't for getting in trouble for animal cruelty, I would have shot any or all of the neighbor's dogs in my mom's yard. A 60-some, widowed woman with health problems has no rights to keep destructive, mean dogs off of her property but hey....don't shoot a dog or you will get fined and maybe even jail time. Sad when a mut as more rights than my mom.
Any irresponsible owner shouldn't have a dog no matter what breed. I will get off of my soap box now. LOL.
This may be to personal for some of you but...
How is the economy crisis effecting you?
Your budget, your retirement, your family, your FRIENDS families.
How is it effecting the circle you run with? Do you discuss this with family or friends?
It is effecting my family. The gas thing alone is cutting our budget! My youngest started college and is driving back and forth. I've called my aunt who lives close to the school and asked if he could stay with her a few nights a week to save gas money. The drive for him one way is 1 hour. It has already saved us $$$. The fact that he can't find a job isn't helping either. There are no jobs for young people. Even in fast food!
Food prices have effected what we eat! Have you priced CHEESE lately? A 2 cup packages of shredded cheese cost more than a gallon of milk! Food has gotten outrageous.
We have our primary home and we have a small cabin that we go to on weekends. Our primary home is paid for and has been but we do have a mortgage on our cabin. LUCKILY and by the grace of God, we are in a fixed rate situation but it's still difficult. Did we spread ourselves to thin? Sometimes it is tough but we budget and try to be careful with what we spend. Our payment is nowhere near the $1500 per month mortgages people are talking about - and at that price point with an adjustable RATE - I don't know how people are living.
Also lucky that we do not have credit card debt. I've read where the CC companys are raising limits to increase spending while increasing the payment interest as well? I see more and more credit cards being used at the grocery store.
It's all just very scarey for me.
We have some friends who are building their dream home. They have worked and saved for 15 years. The economy is blessing them in some ways since there are a lot of people looking for work but hurt them in others as the price of materials skyrockets!
Really personal
I think it takes us all. :) Those with children and without. I have four kids to help make up for those who chose not to have any. :) I was in my early 30's before i decided to have kids. I adopted my 2 oldest, and then got pregnant with my younger 2!
why were you on his *personal* computer anyway? sm
It sounds like you already have a trust issue with this person. Since he is still your BF and not your DH, I feel you had no right to invade his privacy. Maybe he had viewed those things a long time ago, prior to you being his GF. Besides that, I learned a long time ago not to go looking for things, because inevitably, you will find it. You snooped, now you are hurt, and have a very different view of this person. Your relationship is probably doomed now, because you will not be able to get past this. I am sorry for both of you.
I just tell them I have a personal policy
related to telemarketing and take my number off their list. They have to do that by law once you tell them. Eventualy the calls do stop.
not personal, just in general...
So many nasty comments...the point of my post was (and this is the last post I'll make on the subject)a teacher won 10grand...woohoo!!! GREAT for him, a hardworking professional (and yes, underpaid) catches a break! I'm happy for him...end of story! Have a lovely day...
My personal experience has been that --sm
you get what you pay for. I have little trust in their products, although the prices seem good. There are other more reputable places out there.
On a personal note -
 Does anyone have any personal experience with subcutaneous lipomas? I have one the size of an egg in my left lower quadrant and the doctor says it must come out pretty quick; thinks it is attached to the muscle so open surgery is in my future. Anycomments or anything about it? I sure would appreciate it!
My personal thoughts
on the matter - - get out! My husband cheated on me the first time (at least what I knew as the first time) 24 years ago. We stuck together and he said he would never do it again. Well, 5 years ago, it happened again. I wonder now how many times did this occur that I did not know about, or find out about.
Can, but might not. I know from personal experience. nm
x
My personal observations as a
mom: I am in my 40s and grew up back in the old days when discipline for kids in school and at home was okay; however, methods used then are now taboo. It looks like *traditional* discipline (which I feel was not necessarily always sensible) has been replaced with an either hands-off approach (due to fear of lawsuits, retaliation, etc.) or extreme measures, as described in the above post. This brings to mind the question: How much more effective are we these days with these approaches?
I feel for kids these days as well as future generations - looks like they'll have their hands full, if society continues this way.
Not my personal situation but I think
a lot of the people you hear bragging about their refunds are those on some form of public assistance or single parents who are getting the earned income credit. Although I think you can get an advance on this, most do not.
Personally, I like to get around $2000 back for the year. I know I could be saving that on my own, but it's not always that easy. If it were in my account, I'd probably end up spending it. The small amount of interest I'd make on it for the year wouldn't be worth the stress of having to save it.
I haven't done my taxes yet this year because they're probably going to be a mess. We lost our house in a fire in October and were underinsured. Now we have to file some sort of tax deduction for that. It'll probably be more paperwork than it's worth, but we'll see.
just a personal opinion...
I think this can be a little tricky with kids. Children's imaginations are developing and they are learning so many new things, not to mention they do not always know the meaning of things or understand reasons for the way things may be done. Adults on the other hand, I think their dreams do mean something. I think it is their subconscious talking to them. Things they regress coming to the surface. I know I have had some kooky dreams before and they seem to take place when I am struggling with something. I wouldn't put too much into it with an 8 yr old, I have a child who is 10, sometimes they just have bad dreams at that age. If it is something that happens regularly or your heart tells you your child is struggling with something emotionally, it might be worth looking into therapy.
I have no personal experience....sm
with esophageal cancer, but I just wanted to say how very sorry I am to hear of this.
personal proof? does it have something to do
did ya see a ghost or just have one too many drinks??
It's a personal decision...
I researched this topic extensively and I came to the conclusion that circumcision was not right for my family. We've had no problems because of it. I can see why both sides have their opinions, but ultimately it is up to the individual to decide what's best. For us, no circ has worked. My child is very happy to be intact, as he was created.
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