Yup, I feel your pain, but I solved things this year.
Posted By: Laurie on 2006-12-26
In Reply to: Need to Vent. - before I explode
I bought myself a pair of boots I've been wanting forever, and a new purse, and a tennis bracelet - told him they were going to be from him to me. I bought 'em, wrapped 'em, and enjoyed them big time!! I deserved them! My DH means well, too, though just is clueless as well. Rather than sit and feel like crawling back in bed, this year I was right on the floor opening gifts with the rest of the bunch! Sometimes we women have to do what we have to do! 
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- Need to Vent. - before I explode
- Yup, I feel your pain, but I solved things this year. - Laurie
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I feel your pain
It is the same way here. My husband is disabled and could help some with my youngest, but does not. It is up to me to do it all. My MIL used to "butt" in all the time, but thankfully that has stopped. I have a teenager who could also help and does not. Ironically I live with 3 others in my home and I have never felt so alone. There are days my DH will take his disabilty out on me and it is not right, but I don't have to walk in his shoes so I try to be understanding. Men will never be mothers. We surely do not get enough credit! We have to work 24/7 365 days a year. I know personally I work 6 days a week and my "day off" I spend cleaning, doing the errands ect. What day off??? I know it takes longer, but I stop and tend to my kids even when I am typing. It stinks, but a mom has to do what a mom has to do. I just know if I don't help my youngest no one else here will. It's sad, but true. That is why I am still working from home as a MT. Lord only knows what would happen if I weren't here. I pray things get better for you. I can relate to just how you feel. Take care of you!
I feel your pain here also..sm
My sister passed away back in Nov. after 12 yrs in a vegative state resulting from injuries in a car wreck. My mother had chosent have her cremated and wanted to have her ashes spread in the ocean since she was a "sungoddess" by secondary nature! She wanted to wait until the summer time. We are planning to do this about the 2nd week of July. I was thinking about releasing butterflies as a surprise for the family.
As previous poster said, you could also check parks in your local area and have a bench in a nice peaceful area dedicated to her with a plaque. Some parks allow that type of donation. Or, if you are near an ocean, maybe you could to a bench there.
I feel your pain!
I get these little tiny things that look like sugar ants...until they BITE! I have horrible reactions to their bites, much like fire ants. I, too, have cats, so I have to be careful spraying. I also rent, so that eliminates lawn service. Darn ants!!
I feel your pain...s/m
My 7-year-old has asked me several times if we could "move away from daddy". It's hard when you are at a crossroads and your situation sounds a lot like mine. I wish you the best of luck and hope everything works out for you and your child!
I feel your pain (sm)
We have a similar (although not as serious) situation with my in laws. Thank God we have not had to face the kinds of issues you have, but it still hurts. My hubby is their only child, and they just don't care anymore. They were decent parents while he was growing up and in the past few years, and then about 18 months ago, bam! They act like they've been brainwashed.
I won't go into the details, but suffice to say that I'm finished trying to bridge gaps. It just is not worth it. We are going to make our own "family" from friends who actually like to spend time with us and give us support, and when good ol' mom and dad get to that point in their life when they have regrets or, more likely, get too old to wipe their own butts, well honey, that is why we have nursing homes in this country. The sad thing is that my parents are gone, have been for a long time, and I hate to see hubby lose his parents before they are even gone. However, it just is not worth it.
I think you did exactly what you needed to do, even if just to make yourself feel better for a while. It may not have been the most thoroughly thought out action in the world, but you have so much stress on you right now, I think that can be forgiven.
Good luck to you and your husband, and try to stay strong. You have enough to worry about without the in laws adding to it, so just pretend they don't exist for a while. Know that you are not alone, and that you can always vent here if you need to. We'll understand.
HC
I feel your pain
Boy do I ever know where you're coming from! I went on vacation with a bunch of girlfriends last July and I looked at the pictures and thought "who the heck let the elephant in the room!!!" It was horrible. I am going on vaca again with the same women in July and I have vowed to be at least a little bit better.
You do have to lose weight overall to get the double chin to go away. In extreme cases there are people like AL Roker who lost weight but not really much in his face. I'm betting you're not that extreme, though.
My sister and I started walking together three mornings a week. It's not much yet, but it's more than we were doing before, which was nothing. Find a walking partner and try to walk for 30 minutes several days a week and you'll see a change.
Good luck!
I feel your pain
You, my dear, have picked up a stray troll... There is a special place in heck for people who get their jollies torturing people. Just remember that YOU are normal, nice, and decent, and obviously a brilliant mother, and a troll magnet, as am I unfortunately!
Tomorrow is another day!
Love,
Regular troll victim
I feel your pain!
My mother-in-law sent my sone $2 for his birthday, not $20, $2, so what I did was add another $15 and got him a toy I knew he would love and told him it was from his grandma and grandpa. I then called and told them what they gave him. I didn't have grandparents growing up and although it is tempting to let him know what an a**hole his grandma is, it isn't going to do any good now and he will figure it out eventually on his own. Right now, I just want him to feel loved.
Yup, I feel your pain, not hard to
imagine at all as I have many of those on a daily basis 
Honey, I feel your pain..
We have 5 friggin kids..THREE of which are teenagers and the oldest is almost 26 but going to college full-time so I have footing that bill along with all of his other bills he has acquired as an adult..Then, we have the almost 20-year-old daughter who is unable or just doesn't want to work..so we took her back out of the homeless spectrum and got her a home..which we are footing the bill for...Thus, is the reason mom has to work 2 FT jobs..So, my answer to our kids thinking they are EVER moving back home when we boot them out is this...We're buying a motor home when they're gone. On the back it will be named "Kid's Inheritance." Then, as we pull out of the driveway, and if we see them in the rearview mirror, we're hitting the gas!!! and it's like this.."kids, if you can catch us, you can move in, but we won't be doing the speed limit." How's that !!! As you know, as a parent, you have to spend your time laughing or you will just start bawling uncontrollably until they come haul you away.
I feel your pain! (See my posts to other threads above) nm
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I'm so sorry to hear about your loss, i feel your pain nm
n
I feel your pain too, but not spending my money is not going to help you - nm
x
I feel your pain, been down that road many times over the years - sm
I am so sorry for what you are going through. You need to take her to the vet and let her go. That way she will not be suffering any longer and you will know you eased her pain. It sounds like it is time. Again, I have been through this many times over the years with my cats and it is hard each and every time. I will be wishing you all the best.
I feel your pain. I have a grown adult in my face 24/7.
The man needs a job.. He wants to be with me so he sits/lays behind me a lot of the day until I tell him to do something constructive like clean the house..his job.. As I tell him, you've been assigned a job description, now get on it. I will say that I wouldn't spend three or four hours arguing with him, he knows better. I'll knock his block off. :)
I feel your pain... sometimes I consider shaving my head!!! I just keep it short so as not to mess
nm
Cuz you're numbing your brain so you feel no pain! Flavored brandy
s
I feel for you! Let us know how things go. nm
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One day my 3 year old son was looking in the fridge reviewing things
x
But......a whirlwind year of GREAT THINGS!!
nm
I don't want to compare war stories, but I know exactly how you feel. Last year, on my way to vis
family member out of state, I was alone with my 2 children on a major US interstate. As we were leaving a big city and began accellerating, we immediately came to a stop. I almost rear-ended a trailer in front of me. I looked to my left and across the median (a grassy, hilly median) there was smoke, a tractor trailer on the side almost tipped over, and a manged Ford F-150 lying across the highway blocking all oncoming traffic. The accident had happened a minute earlier. I swear you've never seen a truck to mangled. The top was missing, it looked like a convertible, and under the tractor trailer lying face down was a young man (a teenage boy), just under the tires. IN THE TRUCK was a young boy who was apparently sitting in the back but half of his body was in the front. He was twisted like a circus acrobat. Going in and out of consciousness. And the driver of the Ford walking around bleeding in a daze trying to wake up his brother under the tractor trailer. Only 1 person had stopped, and for some reason my instincts told me to immediately pull over (I was in a large SUV with 2 kids in the back - what was I thinking?), but it was a godsend.
So, I go over to the boy in the truck and begin talking to him. He's still breathing. Barely. I lay hands on him and begin praying for him like crazy. Apparently, help had already been called. By the time I was finished the fire trucks and police had arrived.
I walked over to the boy under the trailer and he SITS UP! I thought he was already dead.
I spoke with the driver and they were all 3 high school students on break for lunch. He told me he was in BIG trouble because he took his dad's truck and wasn't supposed to. He knew his mom's work number and called her and I walked away as he began telling her what happened.
I was there for approximately 30 minutes. the police and fire dept. were so kind to me asking me for every little detail I had, which was none since I didn't witness the accident. When I arrived to my destination that night (shaking and crying almost the whole way), I looked on line for information and found NOTHING. Still to this day I have not heard anything about the accident. Not sure if the boy in the truck made it, but I did pray so hard for God to save him. I didn't care that I was bending over his body as people all around me were looking on at the accident scene. It's an experience I will never forget.
I came home and wrote about it in my journal and it took about 10 pages. I still have nightmares of seeing the boy under the trailer lying face down first. But then I think about how he sat up and I feel so much better. It will take time, but the wounds will heal.
I feel so much for you as I had a dear pet to leave me this year
She was born at my home 18 years ago, gosh I loved her. She just died on the 12th of January and I miss her terribly. I doctored, pampered, spoon fed, medicated her for various things and tried. Vet told me about 2 weeks before her demise she had organ failure. I buried her in my yard, had bought a pink receiving blanket for her the day before her death, knew her kidneys were shuting down and held her and told her ok to go. I still get misty-eyed when thinking about her a lot although at first totally not comforted in my grief. I understand your feelings and so sorry, really am.
Don't feel like sending Christmas cards this year
Christmas is next week. Got pix of the family to put in the cards, and tons of Christmas cards from last year's Christmas sales. Every day, I say, I will do these cards. At least to grandma and grandpa on both sides. Every day, I put it off. DH got a roll of stamps and he has the cards sitting on his nightstand with pix, he has not done any either.
Thus far we got several newsletters from people, saying they did this, they did that, they celebrated this birthday, their kid did this and that. We don't plan to do a newsletter this year, b/c it seems to me these newsletters sound so self-centered! They are not even from family members, they are from DH coworkers and such.
My friends send me e-cards pretty much or we chat over the I-net. We send holiday greetings and catch up that way. My son will be getting grandma and grandpa's on both sides presents the end of the week, and I think I will just put the pictures in the packages when I send and forget about the cards.
This is really sad. Years ago, Dec 1 we'd get a bunch of cards and have ours sent out. Different colors of ink on the envelopes, red and green, holiday stamps, it would be so fun. All the cards we'd get my dad or I would put on a board in shape of a tree and we'd put it on the wall.
Now, it seems with snail mail, and so many other worries about cutting budget, finding enough work, I am not in the mood to write cards. Maybe it will become a thing of the past, and the boxes of cards will accumulate dust in the top of the closet.
Anybody else in this predicament? Thanks in advance for sharing your card stories.
'scuse...keep calls short as I feel I must do these things in order to make money. No babies
s
Ask HIM, not us! Can't get anything solved if you don't
s
This problem solved itself for me....
Once my father-in-law came in and found us in bed, he never came in without knocking again. :)
these are the never-solved questions of life
You can *feel* that we will all see them in heaven - but it's the age-old never-solved questions of life............no matter what your preacher, minister, reverend, Iman, or rabbi says. Nobody knows! Nobdy even knows IF heaven exists............
All we can do is try to be as good people as we can and try to put all our OOMPH into our work and positive things and trying to do only good things and we can all hope!
pain and not wanting pain is understandable cuz of medical reason
I mean come on, when he has pain somewhere, does he not want to do something? Seriously, is this a true medical pain problem? If it is, then anyone could understand.
My cat solved my un-filed paperwork problem - sm
... she PEED on them, and I had to throw them all away!
AAAaaaaaggghhhhh !!!!!!
Buy him a hearing aid for Christmas - Both problems solved! hah. nm
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Adam Walsh mystery solved
The guy who did it confessed on his death bed. It was the guy John Walsh always thought did it. I'm glad they will finally get some peace now cause 26 years is a long time to wait.
So change your deductions. Problem solved. nm
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Sorry...should be paint store not pain (maybe pain...hehe)
X
I've heard good things and about things about taking prednisone. My mom was on it for SM
for awhile and it made her look so swollen. I sympathize with you.
Bigger issue - a 16 year old living withi a 29 year old and liability
Are you still not responsible for him until he is 18, how can he tell you where he will live? Unless he emancipates himself and he does something wrong, can they go against you since you are his mother and legally responsible for him? I worry more about him living with a 29 year old sister rather than returning a house key to me that is a bigger issue.
My 14-year-old is going to be a mother-in-law (so funny) if you google it and 11-year-old daughter
x
Won $2,000 on slot machine on New Year's Eve. What a way to start the year. nm
!
Set my budget a year in advance, save all year and
nm
What a difference a year makes! Last year, sm
we had the same problem. Fines everywhere for watering.
Paid $60,000 on principal last year and this year
planning on another $30,000 after my taxes paid for the year. We are getting our house paid down very quickly.
55-year old woman has birthday sex with 12-year old
DAYTON - Gloria Murphy gave children celebrating her 55th birthday alcohol and then had sex with a 12-year-old boy at the party on Thursday, Jan. 29, according to police.
The boy got into Murphy’s bed at 5440 Rawlings Drive, where the married woman had sex with her adolescent neighbor, according to police and Montgomery County prosecutors.
Two of the children at the party ran home at about 6 a.m. Jan. 30 and told a parent they saw the boy and woman having sex, according to 911 audio.
The parent then called police at about 6:15 a.m., according to a police report and 911 audio.
Murphy did not force the boy to have sex, but since he is younger than 13, it is considered rape, Lt. Patrick Welsh said. No other children were involved in the sexual encounter, but some other children at the party consumed alcohol, according to police.
A 17-year-old would have the same goals as a 20 year old (sm)
Only the 20 year old is hopefully more responsible and based on what you say about his character, would be a better choice than someone her own age.
I have a 9-year-old son that sounds just like your 10 year old...
Lately he has been so negative about everything...trying to make him have a good summer and whenever I take him somewhere, he is just a brat when we get home...I think they are called tweens at this age...not quite teenagers but have the attitude like one---LOL
We skipped it entirely last year, and THIS year?
This 40-year-old got dumped for a 30-year-old
http://www.gqmagazine.co.uk/CoolNewStuff/Photos.aspx?StoryID=53859
This year will be our 35th year
The first couple years it was literally 5 or 6 times a day every day (more on the weekends). Over time it gradually slowed down (once a day) and over the past few years its been 2 or 3 times a week. Not sure that is average or not. There were times were I felt it was too much and him not enough, then there were times where I wanted it more and he didn't. Guess everyone goes through a phase. I guess because of how long we've been together, now it's just comfortable - nothing exciting about it. Just a routine. I have to make it exciting in my mind and pretend I'm someone else.
I don't know what it is, but you are correct...after awhile the lust and infatuation wears off and you get in a routine. I guess for us it was that we really didn't know each other when we married (we dated for 3 weeks then eloped). Once I got to know him it was too late. Now 35 years later it is just comfort (and amazingly we never once used birth control and never had any kids). My mom still tells me she's amazed at the frequency of our encounters that not even once did I even have a "close call" with getting pregnant.
But 35 years once or twice a week and 3 or 4 times on weekends. Not sure if that is normal.
Sorry your MIL is a pain..
Sounds like you both need a time out from each other.
Pain
Can you use your hot keys instead of the foot pedal? That works for me.
Lilly
So sorry for your pain
and also for your daughter's pain.
Pain
Everyones pain threshholds are very different. I have had three children naturally and was up walking right after. I had my tubal and was able to go back to work the next day and never needed any of the pain pills that were prescribed.
However my little sister was laid up for almost a week after hers.
So what was easy for me might not be for you I would say speak to your physician he or she hopefully knows you well enough to knowledgeably tell you what to expect. Just be sure no matter what you have someone with you when you get home to give you a hand just in case it is more than you bargained for.
I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers and hopefully it will be uneventful and as painless as possible. Keep us updated.
Arm pain
Has anyone had this happen. I sometimes wake up and my right arm from the elbow to the top of the shoulder burns/aches....very bad and to the point I need to wrap it in a heating pad. The rest of the arm is not affected by pain but my fingers sometimes are a little clumsy especially when trying to type. This has happened around three times now over the past year. It lasts for a couple of hours and then it goes away. I guess it is nothing to worry about but it sure does hurt! Ouch. Just wondering what it could be and/or what causes it.
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