Your relationship is truly blessed and an inspiration to others. Congrats and Love long! :) nm
Posted By: wanderer on 2007-01-25
In Reply to: Working at marriage, can you explain? - Lynn
s
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Long Distance relationship
I think you answered your own question without realizing it. You still want to see new places, experience something new. To move back would mean you would probably never get to do those things...they are dreams you have, don't live your life wishing you had done what you wanted to do. Great relationships are easy to have when there are so many miles between you, when you are living together everyday it will be a whole different situation. Right now you have so little time together you make sure those few hours are perfect or as close to it as they can be. If you stay in this LD relationship you can still move someplace else and see exciting things, you will just find a way to see each other from another location.
What would you do if you got a fantastic, once in a lifetime, can't turn it down opportunity for something tomorrow, would you take it or would you throw that chance away to move back home where you don't really want to be? When you answer that question you will have your answer.
Are you considering a long-term relationship
with this gentleman? If so, you might want to give some serious thought to his money issues as they could very well become your money issues.
His joke was probably just an attempt to be funny, though rather clumsy and thoughtless. Since it bothers you, you could discuss it with him and tell him why it made you angry and base your next move on his response.
It would be his actual money issues that would be of greatest concern to me.
long distance relationship - dead end?
I've been in a long distance relationship for over a year now. About 1000 miles apart....we see each other once a month and it's great for the most part. We miss each other a lot, talk everyday, and almost never fight. We get along great and truly prioritize and look forward to our meetings.
Our only problem is....the long distance thing has no end in site. Neither of us are planning (or willing) to relocate to the other's location just yet. He feels that I should 'come home' back to where our friends and family are, where we both grew up.....I feel he should get out and experience new things while we are young.
I still want to see new places, maybe move again, experience something new again, and am simply not ready (if ever) to move back. So what should I do? Bite the bullet and move back? Does this mean we have reached an impasse that will not work? Sometimes I worry that we are on a dead end road, but I could not imagine splitting because we have such a great relationship.
once the trust is gone, so is the love, and the relationship..sm
be completely honest with him..now, before he gets out of rehab. If he is doing it only for you or to get you back, it is never going to work and it is just a matter of time before HE feels comfortable enough to start drinking again. You sound pretty sure that you want it to be over, so see a lawyer and start divorce proceedings now. don't wait for him to get out and start things all over again. You have to be up front about YOUR feelings, as well. Do not lead him on thinking there is hope. If telling him how you feel puts him back into drinking again, that is his problem and not yours. It would only serve to prove that he was not serious about stopping drinking anyway, and helping himself, but only a means to get back into your life. Do not take on the guilt. He is responsible for his ownself, and you are responsible for you. But do not let his expectations of coming back go on any longer. He has a right to know how you feel now, before it is too late. You already know in your heart that things will go back to the way they were before, if you let him come back. Show him how serious you are, be honest, and start the actions you need to extricate yourself from the situation. He will not change.. trust me on that one. I have been there too.
I have a love/hate relationship with the thing.
Keeps me roasty toasty...In that picture there the wind chill put the temperature to -25, the kind of cold where your eyes steam and then that steam frosts your lashes up. It's very dangerous.
HOWEVER, these coverall things are designed for dudes with no curves, so the crotch winds up going down to your knees and you wind up walking like a penguin. I have wiped out in it and I feel like the blueberry girl from Willy Wonka where they have to roll her away.
No way, no day would you find me in California or anywhere outside of New England. It's best I don't venture too far away from my mental health care providers, know what I'm sayin?
I just some at Tractor Supply I've got my eye on (Man, I'm such a hick!) that are actually specifically tailored for women, so a set of those are on my wish list along with that split keyboard.
I love him.What a character Cedric is already. My lab/dane mix is Walter - such a kick. Congrats! nm
Sorry, got happy way too soon, congrats to Steelers, still love Kurt.....(really-a-Patriots-fanatic,
nm
love my long hair
I'm approaching 50 and my hair is waist length. Like Patti, I don't look or act my age and people are surprised when they learn my age.
I will, however, never forget being in New Orleans and sitting at a bar next to a man who was a hair stylist who told me I was too old to wear my hair that long. He thought I should cut it to just at my shoulders, and honestly, it probably looks better that way...BUT, I love my long hair, and he was an admitted "tri-sexual" (when I asked what that was, he said he would try anything!!!) lol!
What an inspiration!
You weighed exactly when you started what I weigh this morning. I so like the posts you have sent telling us how you did and what you did and sharing. This board continues to help me in all kinds of ways in my life. Thanks again for sharing.
Thanks for the inspiration, I need it - sm
I have to get this done soon before I start having health problems. I guess my fall and shoulder injury are a sort of wake up call. I plan to diet too at about 1100 calories a day, have a plan, just need to stick to it. I guess I will start out with 1 walk a day (1 mile each) and build up to 4-5 miles in the long run (10,000 steps). Figure I will add a mile each week over the next month or so at the minimum, will add faster if I feel up to it though until I am doing 5 miles a day. Just have to get used to using my treadmill on the rainy days! Thanks again.
What's for dinner? Looking for inspiration.
:x
I think you are an inspiration for wanting to do this....sm
 I guess a lot of us can relate; I have 2 or 3 people from my past that have moved far away and I have no way of finding them right now, but please believe me, I truly want to do the same thing, go to them and make peace, to say be able to forgive each other and leave things on good terms. Regrets and guilts can slowly eat away, and it is good for your own personal health to do this, you must feel so much better. WE all mess up, we all need forgiveness now and then, or to grant forgiveness. You are a lovely person with integrity, honor, and caring to do this, such a lovely post to read!!!
If you're asking and the love is long gone, it's time. Make copies of all important papers,
s
The Wedding Singer or if you need inspiration (sm)
Blue Crush is a kind of a "Females can do anything" kind of movie, but it depends on your taste in movies.
Shoulder pain on inspiration?
Hey, any of you out there have a clue what could cause shoulder pain on the right with inspiration? I was feeling fine yesterday and then all of a sudden got what felt like a right chest pain... then I realized its a shoulder pain when I breath in. It doesn't hurt whatsoever when I lay flat on my back, but otherwise burns really badly and sends s sharp pain when I do more than shallow (very shallow) breathing in. Is it a pinched nerve or something? I had my husband rub my back and my shoulder, but although its better this morning, its not really gone much at all. I fell asleep flat on my back and with my knees up last night just to go to sleep after 3 Advil Liqui-caps and had restless legs like a monster! Anyways, having trouble researching it online, so figured I would ask.
You are blessed...
And should feel very fortunate to have wonderful in-laws. Merry Christmas!
you have been blessed!
take care and thanks for sharing!
I too am blessed....
to have a great one. It is not bragging, simply the truth. I married a man, not a boy, and he is respectful, as I am of him.
You are blessed!
Enjoy it! They sure can amaze you, huh? When you least expect it, they can make you feel sooooo incredibly LOVED!!!!
I'm blessed to have two.
There was a time when I didn't think I'd ever trust or be friends with anyone again, but since rekindling a friendship with a woman I knew since I was 20 it's been great. We go walking once a week. So far I keep it to just one day of talking with her so that time we do walk, we chitter chatter about anything and everything under the sun. My other friend's been there for me for almost 15 years. We have our ups and downs, but I think I can confide anything with this friend and vice versa.
You are so very blessed!!
I'm almost speechless. What a wonderful way for things to turn out! Even the hardships, when you share them, can bring you closer together. It sounds like there's a lot of love in your family. Thanks for that uplifting, optimistic post!
Depends if it is long with pregnant pause um no. If it is long and juicy like an op YEP! Short ones
x
i'm so blessed but most people don't know
that i was molested as a child, that i have been held up at gunpoint, i escaped pursuit of a car-full of guys when i was on a bicycle, experienced date rape before there was such a term, had an intruder in the night that even opened my bedroom door when i had a broken pelvis (and i said 'who are you' and he fled)...was the subject of an attempted kidnapping and rape in a hospital parking lot and even a few other things. All this has impacted my life, my emotions, etc, but i am by most standards extremely blessed not only with my life still intact, my basic health, a good husband, happy healthy children, grandchildren, animals etc etc. God can bring us through it all, if we hang on to his hand.
consider yourself blessed - not many speak same
Talk about blessed
Go to myfoxatlanta.com and watch the video of a construction crane collapsing on a woman's car. Miraculously, she was NOT injured...wow!
You are very blessed - I know there are a lot of graet men (sm)
out there. I have many friends whose marriages are great. When my husband complains I bring up one of our friends and say - well you know how Sally's house always looks great? She doesn't work, or she works part-time, and I have seen Joe helping around the house, and don't forget her mother lives in town and can keep the kids when she needs to do things. But it never seems to sink in. I see couples shopping together who look so happy. Sometimes I get in my car and cry because I don't have anything like that at all.
I never do this. But if you want to be beyond blessed this morning, please sm
email me and I will forward you this amazingly adorable thing about DOGS. I am not really a dog person, but after that, I am now! sniff sniff
I would love to share this with everyone. I rec'd it from my aunt this morning. Looking forward to hearing from a lot of you!
This is the email to use:
I'm with you on being lucky and blessed...sm
my husband is retired from the military and we get a very nice retirement check every month from that. He does the laundry and cleaning because he likes doing this and runs the kids to appointments as needed. I don't let him go to the grocery store, though, because every time he goes he goes way over budget by bringing tons of stuff home. He does work 12 hours a week helping in the ASP at a local school just for the heck of it. If we needed him to work full-time he would but we're content with our income and lifestyle, and I love my job so there's no reason to do things differently in our household.
you mentioned how blessed
if you believe in blessings, i would (here goes this word again) "assume" you believe in forgiveness also. i think you should be the bigger one and try to contact your son and make an attempt to straighten things out. at least you will know you tried and then the ball is in his court. :)
Thank you Lord, I am blessed.
Thank you Lord, I am blessed.
"A blessed event" nm
How is your relationship with God? If not God, do you have sm
any spirituality in your life at all? I was exactly where you were....then I found Jesus. Late in life. He has given me purpose and pure contentment.
Nothing satisfies like Jesus and I've done it all: Alcoholism, rx drugs, bad relationships, etc.
Now I'm teaching a Bible study class, have a thriving marriage (after a horrible divorce) and am just very, very peaceful and happy.
Whenever someone like you comes to me with thoughts just like yours, I tell them about God and His saving grace. Will pray for you that you find the contentment you are so searching for.
relationship help
My fiance and I live together - been together 4 years - living together 3 months - supposed to get married this year. . Most of the time, everything is great. He gets stressed out about finances, makes a rude remark to me about my lack of house cleaning ability, I get mad and go off by myself for a few hours - he gets even madder and starts saying our relationship is over, etc. . He leaves for several hours, comes home and we make up. . I am having a hard time with this. . I feel like I have to react a certain way or this whole blow up is going to happen. . I love him and know he loves me - I just don't understand how something so small can turn into something so big. . Anyone with any advice?
MIL-SIL relationship has nothing to do with
SIL's feelings for the daughter, just like MIL's feelings for him have nothing to do with her feelings for her daughter.
relationship
Is this how you want your life to be because he will not change even if he decides he is "ready" to marry you. Everything he does now he will continue to do. You definitely deserve better. Good luck.
you have been blessed with furry friends!!
I can't imagine life without them. They can really make someone's day. I especially love when I hear about the animals helping people in nursing homes or using them in libraries during children hours. I would love to be part of that. What beauty they bring to this crazy world.
Also blessed. And he's incredibly intelligent, too. nm
d
Blessed, Stressed, and Need More Rest
c
Blessed by the Body and Blood
...
consider yourself blessed/fortunate/lucky sm
went in with the best intentions, tried as hard as I possibly could, 15 yrs and 4 marriage counselors and countless tears later, I am posting the message below
she was in control of that relationship
x
Yes, your relationship will change sm
The first three months or so you will both be so tired you won't know how you can possibly make it, but you will. If you have family close by to help, that is great (I was an Air Force wife, so we were far from both our families). Hopefully, though, you will start to see your husband in a whole new light. I know I did. He had never had much use for children before, although I knew he loved animals, so that's always a good sign. He would spend hours playing with our cats, and he loved to sit and watch TV with one or both of the cats in his lap. To me, that showed a loving heart.
He had a lot of learning to do, but he became a wonderful father. Seeing that, I fell in love with him all over again. He became much more open emotionally, primarily with our son, but some of that spilled over into our relationship as well. And having a child together bonds a couple together like nothing else. Here is this wonderful being who is a part of BOTH of you, and who you both love like you never thought you could love another human being.
Sure, there will be difficulties. There will be times when he wants sex and you are so exhausted all you want to do is sleep for a week. There will be times when you are so focused on the baby you won't realize you are neglecting him. But if you are aware of all these possibilities, you are less likely to let the situation go on so long that it becomes a problem.
Good luck to you, whatever happens. 
The whole relationship should have been a no-brainer
Frankly, I thought he should have been given more punishment myself, but I don't think the DA/ADA really put a lot of effort into it. As I mentioned, they were going to accept the SIS until I pointed out that I didn't approve on the basis that it's not like another conviction would be destroying a lily-white record, at which point the ADA flipped through the file and said, "Wow, this guy belongs in jail." Going into it, the 'scoop' on the judge were that the 3 things he hated most were drunks, deadbeat dads, and woman-hitters, and the ex was the trifecta (he's about $1100 behind in his child support), but somehow he got to skate away. I do have mixed feelings about the sentence; I wasn't really injured, but on the other hand that was only because I called before it got worse.
I have my own share of self-esteem issues, which is why I stuck it out as long as I did. The only thing Dr. Phil ever said that made sense to me was, "We generate the reality we think we deserve." So I'm spending some quality time channeling Stuart Smalley and doing my self-affirmations, have blocked his phone, and am generating my new reality.
re the relationship with your daughter...
My sister-in-law, a wonderful woman, has a 30-something daughter, and she is struggling with their relationship. She has recently decided to let things go for a while - for her own sanity. She tells me that there have been problems with their relationship since her daughter was just a child. It pains her to think that she may never have a good relationship with her. My sister-in-law has 2 other children that she has a wonderful relationship with. I think, sadly enough, that sometimes it just works out that way. We have discussed the possibility of her daughter having psychiatric/emotional issues that could be hindering the relationship process - I don't know whether or not that could be an issue with your daughter. The bottom line is, in my opinion, you can only do what you can do. I don't think a parent should EVER give up on their children, but there may come a time when you have to realize that it is what it is, and you just have to accept that and worry about taking care of yourself. Good luck to you.
I had it during my pregnancy a long, long time ago. Husband
aa
I am blessed that my husband is so thoughtful. He bought
put a lot of thought into them. He has always been that way. He is very caring and considerate. Our daughter is equally caring and thoughtful. I am a very blessed and lucky gal.
No problem, I hope you are as blessed as we are with our Anthony.
And incredibly mature and smart. You are blessed. nm
!
That is wonderful! I, too, am very blessed! Merry Christmas! nm
nm
Dont know where your relationship has gone wrong but
my husband and I have been married now for 7 years and he is feely, smoochy, kind, considerate, loving, can have a grab each and any time he wants it. I thank my lucky stars to have found him at my late age. I dont know what has turned the love to disgust for you but I do not feel normally this would be a turnoff for most women, certainly not me. My love just deepens every minute we are together. I will say that I have an ole high school friend (this is her second marriage) that says identical things as you are saying. She and the fellow have no children together but frankly, I would not stay because of the children, never. Your children will suffer in a situation like this. My children grown when I met the present husband but I was divorced, raised the children and would not subject them to more unpleasantness. I think my friend and her husband will come to divorce eventually. Just do not believe you can overcome the disgust when it should be pure heaven by his touch.
a believer in God, personal relationship with God
My spirituality comes from many places...
Mother Teresa said:
People are often unreasonable and self-centered. FORGIVE THEM ANYWAY.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of ulterior motives. BE KIND ANYWAY.
If you are honest, people may cheat you. BE HONEST ANYWAY.
If you find happiness, people may be jealous. BE HAPPY ANYWAY.
The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow. DO GOOD ANYWAY.
Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough. GIVE YOUR BEST ANYWAY.
For you see, in the end, it is between you and God. IT NEVER WAS BETWEEN YOU AND THEM ANYWAY.
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And that, my fellow MTs/MEs, is something we all should contemplate!
Have a GREAT week!!!
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