You hit the nail on the head, so to speak
Posted By: (sm) on 2009-03-30
In Reply to: How did you first know you were pregnant? - curiousmt
When I read your first line, I was going to post about the swollen/sore breasts. That was definitely what clued me in. I think it actually started before the first missed period with me.
Good luck! I really hope it's your time!
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Wow. You SO hit the nail on the head with this one--sm
It seriously sounds like you have been there before and found your way out of it somehow. I so applaud your way of helping this poor exhausted woman, and I feel badly for her, because I have been there too. My ex was ALOT like this, controlling, passive-aggressive, and had a very abusive anger problem, as well. She did not state how long she has been with this man, but if things don't change, I fear abuse may be the next step. In my experience, people like this do not change. You do. Sometimes the only way to change the situation is to leave it, entirely. forever. I am also sorry to say that when I left my ex after 13 years of abusive control, he moved on to the next one...she took her own life after 14 years due to the same treatment. He married again after that, with the roles reversed and his wife controlling him...he took his own life last year. The ones who suffer? the children. MY children, his children, who will never be the same because of all of this. Think about all of this *exhausted*. It is only meant to help you open your eyes, see your options, and ACT on them...for your sake, and your children. Hugs to you, as well. Your post brought back some very unpleasant memories for me. Good luck to you!!!
you hit the nail on the head! Thank you for saying better than me. sm
He did not offer to pay for the car. When you are in marching band in high school you don't always have the luxury of working. He taught music lessons. That was enough for spending money not car payments. He has a scholarship but other than that I pay for everything.
We had a good talk this afternoon. I told him that there would come a time in the not too distant future when that trip would be allowed. However, I want a phone call before he leaves and one when he gets there. I want to know he made it safely. Honestly, I told him I was not mad about this and I understood that he wanted to see her, but lying is wrong. End of story. When I asked him if he was there I wouldn't have been near as upset if he had told me the truth but he kept digging his hole deeper and deeper.
I don't know what my husband is going to decide to do about the car. I asked him to consider leaving it. I told him I don't think my son will do it again. I told him that it is important that the girlfriend's parents like him and pulling crap like this is not going to endear them to him.
I put the idea in my husband's mind that maybe he could take a picture of the speedometer when he gets there tonight so that we know the milage. He is going to talk to him tonight. If he did that, he will still have local use of his car. I don't know. Everyone is pretty upset right now. Me, my husband, my son, his girlfriend, her parents.
I actually think that maybe he understand where I am coming from. I reminded him what if I got a phone call saying he was in an accident and severely hurt or worse and I think he is safe at school.
Wow - you hit the nail on the head - for me (sm)
"...hung onto the relationshipeve afer it was obviously not good for us. I think we just had to prove that we were good enough to be loved." That is exactly how I ended up in this marriage and exactly why I have been in it for so long. I was so determined to prove that I was good enough to be loved. Unfortunately, now there are children involved and I have to figure out what is best for them.
OMG! - you have hit the nail on the head!
x
Very well-put. You hit the nail on the head.
.
I think you hit the nail on the head.
I have also had a few more days to think about what the other posters said too. Whether I want to admit it or not, hormones do make the moment seem worse and make me want to snap into all or nothing.
You have some great ideas. I agree that she didn't need to get me a gift if she wasn't coming to the shower, and probably would have preferred that rather than get me a gift of the wrong gender. At any rate, I will send her a nice thank you and call her to see how her wedding went since I was not able to be there for the big day. I will also make mention to her that evening before I leave that I would still like to see her, if even for a few minutes. It's a male/female shower at a sports bar so if nothing else I would like to get to know her husband better.
I don't want this to ruin the small bit of friendship we still have left or my shower but she was honestly the only person I was really looking forward to being at my shower. but I must get over that and be greatful that we are still friends in some way.
You hit the nail on the head....sm
Everyone be thankful that you do not have anyone in your life doing this to you. You can say well don't answer the phone, don't answer the door, call the police. But when you do all those things and it still does not do any good you don't know where to turn. He has literally knocked on my door 4 times in 1 hour tonight. That is just one hour not the rest of the day. You would think after you don't answer it the first 5 times he would take a hint. Nope. I am friends with a deputy around here. My husbands uncle is also a deputy. They cannot do anything about it. He is on his own land. All I can do is move and looks like that is what I am going to have to do now. It definitely is not fair, but life isn't fair.
I think you hit the proverbial nail on the head! sm
I attribute the lack of sexual morality among young people today, both boys and girls, to the lack of a strong father figure such as you had. (And I am not discounting the role of a loving mother in a child's life; however, they play an entirely different role.) I'm not talking about a tyrannical overbearing father but rather one who not only loves his daughter but also his wife and demonstrates the way a girl/woman should be treated. Skyrocketing divorce rates as well as otherwise absent workaholic fathers today have removed a very important piece of the machanics of raising moral children who have more self-respect for themselves than to go on rampant sexual escapades in search of a way to fit in with their peers.
I think you hit the nail on the head as far as comparing
Adam to Steven Tyler. In the early days of Aerosmith, I LOVED them, but after he developed his 'signature scream' and did it in every single song to the point of sounding stupid, it got so monotonous that I can't stand him anymore. I still like the early stuff though. Adam is like Steven Tyler now that he's not good anymore.
you hit the nail on the head; the only way they were able to "prove" his age was by school rec
my mom also works at a prison and she says about 75% of them are illegals so we not only foot their education, we foot to take care of them after they come here and commit their crime for life.
why can people immigrate to the US if they don't yet speak the language? Canada you have to speak
We briefly looked at emigrating to Canada. They have a point system for admission. You must know at least one and preferably two of their national languages to be admitted (English and French). You also must be young, healthy, and either independently wealthy, or educated and highly skilled in high-income professions. You cannot have a family member with a chronic illness, even if they are not coming with you, because you might send your income home to help them rather than spending it in the Canadian economy. Every child or dependent you have is measured against your wage earning power and if it looks like your family might tax the social system too much, you are turned down. This all makes perfect sense even though it may seem unfair (we looked at it before and decided not to go due to their arms laws. Now they wouldn't take us anyway because I have been diagnosed with MS since then).
This is very, very different from the US who it seems will take anyone and everyone.
I heard about a US chicken processing factory that was working with Welfare to put people to work because their supply of immigrant labor had run short. So, why don't we limit immigration until every American is working who can? And pay them a living wage with healthcare (illegal immigrants are too afraid to ask for these things and so the wage drops and benefits are not provided).
Oh! Head in the SAND! I thought you said head in the CAN!
x
You have hit the nail on the
head. This is exactly what I am talking about but never knew the words for them. I will show to my hubby. The ones I have read off the list are cute and I know so many of those. Thanks!
Usually with a nail.
e
They come off when the nail sheds. Then you
Still a better option than declawing or getting rid of the cat. ALSO... many shelters in our area consider declaws 'un-adoptable', and often euthanize right off the bat, since many have behavior and/or litter box issues, and frequently get returned to the shelter after adoption. My declawed kitty had been taken to a shelter by her original owners, and the only reason she wasn't euthanized right away was she was a purebred Persian, and the Persian rescue I got her from pulled her from the shelter.
nail polish remover
i used nail polish remover
didn't remove color from couch either, also have tan leather and 2yo got a black marker left by 16yo brother
How about nail polish remover?
NM
did ya try acetone or nail polish remover?..nm
.
Anyone know of a trick to get dark nail polish off a light rug? Help!
nm
I use finger nail polish remover. It stinks though.
x
I agree with the nail polish remover, just make sure sm
you have the type with acetone in it. The acetone-free stuff won't work. My son got super glue-a big, think chunk-on his eyeglasses and nail polish remover got it off.
Acetone is nail polish remover, already said that earlier
NM
Anyone know a good way to remove nail polish from carpet? - sm
My daughter spilled nail polish on the carpet in her room, so now I have a long line of pink nail polish on the carpet. Tried with nail polish remover, but not much help. Any ideas? Thanks.
Change the locks on your doors, nail the windows shut
and fill out a restraining order against him.
I would say no, I speak though as one of the few who cannot -sm
breastfeed though (apparently something is missing or does not work right anyways ), so both my kids were formula fed. It is dangerous to have it drilled into you that you should breast-feed. I tried and tried not knowing any better and my poor daughter basically starved her first week of life, once the doctor's realized I was not making any milk they/we got her on formula right away. I had been giving her about 4 ounces a day of formula anyway once we suspected something was wrong, but they basically yelled at me for doing that. Luckily my child made it through okay and boy could she suck it down once she had something to drink. Too much emphasis is put on breastfeeding, etc. Most of us were probably formula fed and I am sure we all turned out okay.
Please, you cannot speak for all of us...
because I happen to be a Jewish person who believes ALL PEOPLE are the sons and daughters of G_d......and let us not forget that Jesus was Jewish!
We are all the sons and daughters of The Lord......we all need to open our minds.
Have a GREAT Saturday and Shabbot Shalom!! 
Me too, but only if I could speak
nm
I can't speak from experience, but (sm)
by what you describe, it sounds as if it was caught early. This makes all the difference, from what I have read with all cancers, but especially with ovarian cancer - very hard to detect. So that cyst was probably a good thing for you!! I will keep you in my prayers. Let us know how things go.
Ask to speak with his supervisor and also
write a letter to the bank (and headquarters) telling them what happened and make sure you get the man's name and refer to him often in your letter.
speak for yourself SWEETHEART--sm
but not this person. Just stay away from me...I don't want to get hit by any lightening bolts aimed at you. lol. and please stop trying to shove your atheist beliefs down my throat, too. It is all BS as far as I am concerned.
Excuse, did not speak about yours
you must have been trying to read between the lines and never said anything about your dear one. You imaged.
consider yourself blessed - not many speak same
It's your husband who should speak up for you, but
know that the situation may never change to a warm, loving relationship with your in-laws. I'm in something of the same situation, but nowhere near as bad as yours. I haven't really had to have my husband speak up for me, because in my case, I don't really care to socialize with my siblings-in-law. My MIL was always nice about sitting for the kids, but now that my kids are grown, that's not a factor anymore. The last time we all gathered together was at my FIL's funeral last year.
It is harder when you have little children, and your own supportive family is 3000 miles away. But where you need to place your focus is on your husband and yourself. Talk with him about it, calmly. What does he say? Is he willing to keep his relationship with his family to the courtesy sort of functions where ALL of you are invited? If so, HE should tell them why he is keeping his family (you and the children are his family now) from this toxic situation. And if they agree to have you all at their functions but still treat you badly, then it's your husband who should address the situation with his sisters and mother. If you are the person at the front of this, you will never win. Your husband has to realize that you and his children are his first responsibility, and that he should defend that relationship at all cost.
I do not see how any siblings could ever speak to him again
Maybe they have forgiven but I have heard (not from my friend) but other members of the family he is a gambler, womanizer and really not someone you would want to be around. This, though the friend says, had absolutely nothing to do with wanting the name change but parents are not always someone you can look up to and honor. I respected my father until I found out about the molestation, then no more.
What is the "pop" of which you speak?
Not trying to cause trouble, just don't understand what you are saying.
To the OP - hang in there! It will work out.
I would suggest she also speak with
the hospital administration about this issue. I would think it is a definite violation not to have him in an isolated room, which would be indicated outside the patient's room. Not only are they being exposed, but the patient may be being exposed to other viruses in an immune-compromised state.
It does speak to his character.........
Others can try to sugar coat it or find excuses, but it does speak to his character and what he deems important. Did your daughter speak up and say anything to him about this or did she just sit idly by? I have had the same situation and it does speak volumes for both.
do you speak with your hands - and I don't mean
My husband does not listen to me either. He looks like he's paying attention but he misses half of what I say. Couple thought I have is. Awhile ago we were watching a TV special it said that people listen and remember what you say when you talk with your hands (the study was done on school children). Well I don't talk with my hands. Never have and don't know how and when it do it just looks odd. I told him maybe I should start talking with my hands because then he would remember what I tell him.
I'm not sure if this is a normal thing for guys or not. We've been married 26 years and he hardly ever listens to me. I have to repeat things 2 and 3 times. Once we were getting ready to do 3 errands. As we were driving I asked where he was going and he said to this place and I said no, we have to hit these other 2 places first and he claims I never told him. I said I told him twice and then he became irate as though I was pointing out a mistake (he does not take kindly to me pointing out that he made a mistake even if I say it nicely, but he has no qualms in telling me whenever I made a mistake). Anyway...I don't know when my husband stopped listening to me either. Maybe about 10 or so years ago. He'll listen, but I think a lot of it is if I don't say what he want's to hear he just tunes me out. Our things are not major life threatening issues, but a lot have to do with "what he's going to do when he grows up". He's been out of work for about 5 years now and he doesn't know what he wants to do with his life (he's 50 years old). We will talk and talk and talk and then the next day it's back to square one like I never said anything.
Sometimes what I will do that helps is I take scratch pieces of paper and I write notes on them and them leave them all over the place. Like I keep a running list of errands we have to do and keep it on the corner of the table and a couple times through the week I will say we need to to this or we need to do that, and then I ask him when he would like to go do them (usually it's just the grocery store, or the place to pay our bills), but at least that gives him the option of feeling like he's in control of when its going to be done, when actually I am the one in control because the bill will need to be paid in the week. He too can be disrespectful of me and look at me funny if I'm telling him something, so what I've done is if I get the look from him I immediately stop talking. Then I will say the same exact thing he does to me "your not interested in what I'm saying?"
Maybe the note thing will help, it does with me. I wish you luck.
I guess I can't speak for everyone..
but I did not have that difficult a time stopping. I had tried before, but I could always come up with excuses for myself to keep smoking. For you,it could be different. And, of course, I had the meds. I do hope you will quit, for your health's sake, and I wish you luck. I never meant to sound offensive.
Funny you should speak of this
My now deceased MIL raised some piggies and she named them. I could not go and eat a friend I had named and raised, would be like eating one of my kitties. You know the older I get the more vegetables get to looking better to me just because more appealing to me. Have you ever had any problems like anemia for not having meat in your diet?
Can't speak for Pugmom - but when I see () or J**B
I would much rather read Pugmom's posts than her hater's posts. The poster above needs to learn how to spell. No wonder she is so angry. She is an MT that cannot spell or make a proper sentence. 
Speak to the director of financial aid
Ditto the advice on Voc Rehab.
You should be able to get food stamps *if* you qualify for work-study OR work at least 20 hours/week. I would appeal their denial ASAP. Ask for the caseworker's supervisor and say you want to appeal their decision. They should send you a letter with a "hearing" date on it.
Call and ask to speak with the Director of Financial Aid. Be persistent and keep asking for him. If you can't get through go to the Provost office or some higher up at the college. I've done it with a 18 month old in a stroller at my side! :)
One more thing - every single school I have ever attended had some sort of emergency loan for students. It's usually called a short-term loan or something like that. Also see if you can get $ on your ID card for the cafeteria. That can put that on the loan too.
The writing is on the wall, so to speak
You make a difference in the g'parents- your children are picking up on this. I had a similar thing going on with my son- my mother did all the loving, fun things he wanted- my father (they were divorced, each remarried) was strict, no fun to be around, hardworking but I believed in their being able to share and I did. Both are deceased now and I do not regret having him spend as much time with 1 as the other. Oh, BTW, one of my most enjoyable things as a child was when I spent time with my father and his wife- they had a small garden and I absolutely loved to dig up the potatoes- used to beg to get to do it. You should have a good talk with everyone and insist spending time with all- don’t let your feelings play into their hesitancy on going. Grandparents are not always right but she wants to have some time with them. Not all g'parents want to be bothered with kids, believe it or not.
Excuse me, I speak Jive.
I would love to see a clip of that part again!
Not judging honey, believe me, I speak...
my mind and you could tell if I was judging others. This place is teeming with unhappy, whining, complaining women (just look at some of the posts all over this site) and that is not a judgement, it is fact. As far as being in the same situation as others one day, if you read any of my posts you would see that I have been there, done that and changed my ways. Should something happen, we have learned to save money, have enough put away to last a year and not have to touch any retirement, etc. That took a lot of determination and hard work on our part and we are proud of it.
I am get a good chuckle out of some women who accuse other women of "living off their husbands" and "where would you be without his money". I can make my own money, but my husband doesn't tell me that i need to work and doesn't tell me how much I need to make. He is the provider in this family and has never once asked me to work harder, earn more or get a different job. Remember when men used to do that and our mother's stayed home and raised the family and didn't work? Are you jealous of your girl friends or family members that don't have to work or who live debt free or do you hold that judgement for those you do not know?
Enough of this for now. I'm sure someone will have something to bash me about later on...go ahead, it just shows how very immature some women can be.
You are so true when you speak of the furkids
I lost my older girl last January and she was born and died at my home- she was 18. My grown daughter still can hardly speak of her, gets all misty. I have 3 more but they never take the place of the one who is gone. Each is their own little separate kitty. I told my hubby never could run around, not enough time- got to see about the pets, feeding, watering, treats, it goes on and on all day.
you should speak to your spiritual advisor
Do you attend a church or other religious program? If so, you really should speak to someone there about your situation. I know several of my local churches offer to put together Christmas dinners for those who can't afford to and they've also given cash to them to buy for their families or help with their bills. People are more generous than you might realize.
Do you have children and/or a significant other? Depending on who you need to "shop" for, we may be able to offer nonmonetary suggestions that will make you feel good and the person you're giving the "gift" to.
Things are always worse than they seem. Hope your spirits are lifted soon. Good will.
Take it easy! How many languages do you speak? ..sm
Give some respect to people who are bilingual and even trilingual.
MTing is probabaly the only thing you can do!
The OP complained only about the position of the month and day in the date, geez!
I am planning as we speak to move in the next . . .
1-2 years. I have lived and traveled all over and have been in Georgia for almost 20 years. I hate this backwards state!! I am originally from Virginia and that's where I want to live out the rest of my life. It is the best and truly God's country.
Different parts of the country speak
differently--did you ever consider that. I am from the South and am always having something said about the way I say certain words. You need to calm down a little.
First, go to Alanon. Second, maybe speak to a counselor sm
about your feelings. If he truly does change, is there anything that would make the marriage worth salvaging?
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