You are soooooo wrong, mixed marriage
Posted By: Sammie on 2007-05-10
In Reply to: it's a restauranteur.............N/M - r u racist?
mixed kid. I am saying we should NOT under any circumstances be paying for feet bath just because of their religion. We are not allowed to have anything religious put up, be it a cross, nativity scene at Christmas, the 10 commandments. Why in the crap should they be treated different. Wake up and smell that strong coffee that is brewing and I do not mean Starbucks.
Complete Discussion Below: marks the location of current message within thread
The messages you are viewing
are archived/old. To view latest messages and participate in discussions, select
the boards given in left menu
Other related messages found in our database
Wrong. And why do you think a same-sex marriage
a heterosexual one? The ceremony is exactly the same... we're not talking voodoo and witch-doctors, here.
Unlike too many other parts of this country, SF is more tolerant and forward-thinking. I know that's a scary concept in some places, but homophobia, violence and hatred towards people who appear 'different' is a scary concept out here.
I love SF's diversity, color, vibrance and tolerance. That's why even though it's ridiculously expensive to live here, especially for an MT, I just couldn't stomach living anywhere else.
Nothing wrong with believing in man/woman-only marriage,
By getting married, same-sex couples aren't 'forcing' anything on anyone. Nor are they hurting or threatening anyone. They're just trying to practice their own religious beliefs. If they're not religious, then they get a civil union, or don't get married at all. Exactly the same as the rest of us. It's just NOT any big deal.
As an equal partner in this marriage, why is it wrong for me to express my wants? (sm)
You seem to imply that because he wants to live here, I have to whether I like it or not. I have lived here for over 10 years. Why is it wrong for me to want what I want, but okay for him to impose his wants on me?
OH THANK YOU SOOOOOO MUCH!!! IT WORKED!!! SM
i'm going to write that down so i'll remember. hopefully it won't happen again. i told 5 y/o stick to playstation!
thank you so much!!!!
None for mixed breeds willing to help.nm
:-(
Mixed feelings
I had extremely harsh and unforgiving feelings toward ANY sexual misconduct/abuse situation.
Then, one of the young boys in my family was found guilty of such.
It has split and torn my entire family apart.
The agony of loving this young man and despising his act is killing the soul. His parents are especially suffering.
Before I was in this situation, I simply felt we should put them all to death. Now, I'm not sure what to believe.
I do believe he should pay his consequences and I am relieved that the court has to do this terrible job. They can be objective. It is harder when you know the individual.
I want him to suffer the consequences of his actions. I want him to rightfully bear the conviction, the shame, the social retribution for it.
At the same time, I want him saved, rehabilitated, redeemed.
He is mortified of how he will be treated for the rest of his life. I remind him that one reaps what they sow.
I have great sympathy for him, for his victims (this was sexual misconduct, not rape), for all of us in this situation.
I'm not sure why I'm even posting this other than remind everyone: The persons who commit these acts are someone's child, too, regardless of age. Someone loves them, too.
Sorry, got your post mixed up with sm
I read another post where a vet was involved, sorry. I do have experience though with depressed family members (some vets) and my parents would get depressed as well over money, so I know what you're going through. The sad thing is they didn't try to help themselves and I let it weigh heavy on me and like you, I could not enjoy things myself sometimes. I know what you're going through. You have to tell yourself, you didn't cause it and can't change it, as much as you want to. Just keep praying, it does help! Pray that they "get the message."
Mixed drinks.
mixed feelings
I have mixed feelings on this subject. I think a lot of it has to do with the owners but maybe there is something about the breed too - not sure. But yesterday a friend of ours had to shoot his neighbor's pit bull. . The dog was known to be mean and is usually kept inside but it was out and came after our friend's 2y/o grandchild. He got the child inside and when he looked out, the dog was going after another neighbor's child. He got his gun and shot it. . However, I will say, the owner of the pit bull is a known drug dealer and not a very nice person, so that could be why the dog was so aggressive.
Is your pit mixed with boxer?
He looks like my boxer a bit
to me, the girl definitely looks mixed -
In the one picture I saw, the girl is mixed. the boy, I agree that could go either way, but I still say if he says it is his, then its his. Never saw the baby in pictures.
One year I mixed up all the 4 kid's names
example.. put Debbie's name on Scott's gifts, Scott's name on Mark's gifts, etc. Just let them keep shaking and guessing on the presents.. that were not even their own... It was a real payback for Mom and Dad to see the looks on their faces on Christmas when they recieved their real gifts, with the wrong names on them and they realized they put all that work into guessing and trying to figure out what was in boxes that were not even theirs! LOL
Honestly I have mixed feelings on this.
On one hand...I feel it is your body, you can do what you wish. Who should say what you do with your body. Providing it is willing, agreeing, consenting adults, that should be their choice.
On the other hand...I think some, if not many, who get into prostitution, it is a bad life...they have low self esteem, no respect for themselves...and they are at their lowest and do not know what to do or where to turn. Many times they are so involved with drugs and alcohol, they can not think clearly.
But at the same time...the ones who are "low", are going to do what they can to make money....whether it is prostitution, selling drugs, stealing....illegal or not, they will do it if they are that desperate.
Heck, there are women and men out there selling thier bodies, making good money...or at least money...why not make it legal so you can tax them!
I think I'd add some mixed shredded cheeses & scallions to this. Yum! nm
s
mixed drinks . summer or winter?
x
Oops - got my name and subject line mixed up above
Guess its time to call it quits. :-) The two are backwards.
Whether full pit or mixed pit, loads of shelters will NOT
let them be adopted out. I was at a shelter the other day, lady came in wanting to retrieve a pit her daughter had taken from her home in a drug bust. The person was told could not let go, it was a pit and the woman said but it is not full and the answer was NO difference, mixed, full they are a danger to society and the people who would adopt know this. The shelter has sign on door (pits have green signs on their individual place) and the sign says no pure or mixed pits adopted out. Don’t you just think maybe these people who have had experience with the breed probably onto something? Naaaa, people just want to keep thinking otherwise. Your life, not mine.
I got a vase of roses and other flowers mixed in ...sm
delivered from the local florist to my house. It was sweet.
Years ago had a mixed breed (1/2 pit) and he was allergic to the carpet! sm
We tried everything and finally had to put in outside. My husband built this beautiful kennel for him. He actually thrived outside! I missed having him to snuggle with, but seeing how his health improved outside it was the best for him.
I love Bell's Seasoning mixed in with mine.
...along with the ol' standby's of mayo, onions, black pepper, and I line my bread with cranberry sauce.
Now I'm really really really hungry!
Early riser...margaritas (mixed drinks)
My son loves fruit juice with vanilla yogurt mixed in, over ice.
ikl
You ead my response wrong, terribly wrong
I am trying to ask what does she think it will help, not being nasty- tell me and I will try this. I would stand on my head and gargle peanut butter if I thought it would help - I wanted to know why a letter? They are thumbing their noses at the courts - commanded to appear- I was there and they werent.
That would definitely not be enough for me to consider it a marriage. sm
why do you all think you need some obviously lame guy to complete you? Is it just youth and hormones?
marriage
You are so fortunate. In this day and age, everyone is all about "me". My husband has no CLUE what it means to "work as a team." He simply cannot grasp it at all. He does what he wants to, when he wants to and how he wants to, whenever he wants to. If I ask too many questions he gets angry at me. I am now figuring out 15 years later that I made a pretty big mistake by marrying him. However, we have three beautiful children, and the one thing we do agree on is that they need both parents to raise them. My husband would argue the color of the sky if he was in the mood. He is contrary simply to be contrary. I give up. He gives me the information he thinks I need to have. I don't ask him for anything anymore because he absolutely will not do it (help with getting everything done, i.e., housework, paying bills, makign phone calls, etc.). All of the concerns I had before we got married (which I did bring up to him) have come true. I should have known it. People just DO NOT know how to work together anymore.
marriage
I think we are raising our sons to be "mama's boys" and not be the proper leaders they need to be. Plus, in this day and age of no boundaries, children have no guidance and absolutely no direction. My husband does not have a plan from one minute to the next. It is absolutely crazy. he cannot set a goal and reach it if his life depended on it. We just wait to see what he is going to do next. I honestly never know what he is going to come up with. He absolutely adores his children, and they feel the same. I have seen what divorce does to the children, I will not do that to mine. But sometimes, I just want to scream. Thanks for allowing me to vent. I have asked him to go to counseling, but he doesn't see a need (he has everything he needs). I will teach my children what to look for in a mate and the warning signs. Hopefully they won't have the trouble that I have had.
Marriage
Marriage is a relationship that you have to take care of each other first and always. He should always think about what makes you happy and you the same. You both should be covered at all times. There needs to be ongoing communication so you both can determine what makes things work for you. Most marriages fail because people don't want to talk and would rather "mind read" or assume. You know what they say about assume. You should always treat your spouse like he/or she is the most important person in the world and is first in your life. If you have someone that takes advantage of that and does not appreciate it, then that is not the one for you. Ignorance and immaturity takes kindness for weakness. A mature man or woman knows that that is how they should be treated and how they should treat their mate.
Second marriage
I'm planning to get married for the second time. My last marriage was 17 years ago and I've been on my own with my 14 y.o. son for almost 10 years. For my last wedding I dotted all the I's and crossed all the T's but I was so exhausted I didn't even enjoy the wedding. I think I have a mental block for wedding planning now because I never really thought I'd be doing it again. However, I have zero doubt that I want to be with this man. We both just want to be together and can't decide whether to just go on a trip and get married or have something small with our families and a few close friends. We think it would be nice to have our immediate families help us start our marriage off but I can't seem to make myself think about planning things and picking things out. Mainly I'd just like to wear a pretty dress (not necessarily even a wedding dress and definitely not an elaborate one). It seems if you start planning to have one thing it calls for another. I've looked at some of the wedding checklists and it makes my head hurt to think about picking out cakes, etc. I don't want anything tacky but I don't want to spend a lot of time on details. Any ideas? Also, what are your thoughts on giving your future husband a wedding gift. A do or not? Thanks so much for any advice you have to offer. I don't think we are going to wait long at all so I won't have much time to plan a lot anyway, which suits me just fine.
Second marriage
I live in Eastern North Carolina. There seems to be a lot of placed in Tennessee that look pretty romantic too. I'm browsing through those now.
Second marriage
Lots of great ideas. Thanks so much. I really like the iPod idea.
I think she needs to get out of the marriage - NOW!! (sm)
That could end up being a dangerous situation as well. I have had female friends from this type of cultural background who had to go into hiding from their own brothers to keep from being beaten to death for the crime of dating a white man. She really needs to get out now before they have children.
What is there to think about? Marriage...
is taking a vow.
vow verb [T] to make a determined decision or promise to do something, which includes not sleeping with other women and no cheating WHATSOEVER. He broke the Vow.
Marriage is a vow.
Of course I understand that marriage is a vow. Marriage is also a commitment. Problems that seem insurmountable sometimes are not, given time.
Before your marriage, did you or did you not....
Let your DH see you in your wedding gown?
Marriage Help
Am hoping to hear advise from other in my shoes. Been married 18 years and completely and totally unhappy. Husband doesn't beat me, is a good provider, just not in love any longer. Kids involved under age 14. Do I stay or do I go? Trying to stay until kids leave house but very hard - hard to even look at him. He has told me i am average but he love me, has corrected all my mistakes throughout the years, because only he and God are perfect oh but he loves me more than anything! A year ago he wrote me a letter that pointed out all my flaws and could not understand why I wanted him to leave. Please advise. I am so terribly sad and miserable and don't know what to do. State I live in very expensive and would never want to move my kids elsewhere. Hints on staying in an unhappy marriage would be great.
Bad marriage
Hi Done:
I left last September after 30 years. I am happy being on my own even though it means I must work long hours to support myself. My husband and I are separated, not divorced and I took no money from him.
The marriage was not so terribly bad - no physical abuse, very little verbal, but the interesting thing is that my children were way more aware of the underlying unhappiness than I would have imagined. I thought we never really argued - they thought the atmosphere was tense all the time.
I will say that I feel lucky that my youngest child is 17. On the other hand, she chose to stay with her dad (as well as my 21 year old son) and that was/is heartbreaking. But I did not have the right to choose for her. I moved into an apartment across the busy street from where I lived. My children can visit whenever they want.
It seems that my children are actually happier now too. Can you arrange a trial separation? The thing is, nothing has really changed in the situation between my husband and I, and it doesn't seem like it will. We both have an incentive not to make things final with divorce - mine is to keep his good insurance coverage, his is to avoid needing to give me any money.
I feel I had a lot of issues in the marriage due to the incest I suffered as a child and he had issues too. We just were not able to make any progress on this stuff in marriage therapy and neither of us has made any inquiries to each other about the possibility of trying again. And do you really think people can change? I just don't know. I think you have to really want to change. And someone who thinks they are perfect and points our your flaws all the time and tells you that you are "average" is probably not looking to change.
You deserve better for yourself. Just do it on your time and at your convenience. It is possible to stay for a while longer until your children are older. I thought I would wait until my youngest was out of school, but there was one of those "last straw" kinds of episodes last year and that was it.
I wish you the best. But just know that your children are aware of what is going on and do you want them to use your marriage as a model for themselves?
If it's you second marriage and the first one
Didn't workout - then don't spend ANY money on the second one. Save it for the divorce - LMAO
Before & After Marriage..
Before marriage.....
He: Yes. At last. It was so hard to wait. She: Do you want me to leave? He: No! Don't even think about it. She: Do you love me? He: Of course! Over and over! She: Have you ever cheated on me? He: No! Why are you even asking? She: Will you kiss me? He: Every chance I get. She: Will you hit me? He: Are you crazy! I'm not that kind of person! She: Can I trust you? He: Yes. She: Darling!
After marriage.... Simply read from bottom to top.
marriage
Once 39 years and we did not live together before either.
Marriage
I know what you mean about smothering. DH has several guys he works with whose wives won't do anything without their husbands. DH and I have always said we have very little in common except how we feel about each other. He doesn't ask me to get out of our warm bed at 5 a.m. in 20 degree weather to go deer hunting and I don't make him go to the beach with me in the summer and get sand in his shorts. It works perfectly for us. Our 24th anniversary is next month and we have 3 awesome kids. Definitely had our ups and downs but it's all been worth it.
Marriage
Well said. I was just thinking that. My husband just told me I have until the kids get out of school next week to get out. This all started over a milkshake of all things! Why are most men jerks? Looking back I have lost over 20 years of my life for a lot of similar reasons. Friends tell me the same info about God ect. But does God want us to be so unhappy???? That doesn't make sense to me at all!
Marriage
Living with someone is hard work, married or not. My parents have been married 45 years. My sister's marriage lasted just under 3 years. I've never been married but have lived with my SO for 3 years. We would get married if the marriage would be recognized everywhere as a valid marriage.
Sounds like your marriage is over
NM
Not sure what posts are below re marriage
but you sound so very well grounded and truly in love and love your husband and obviously he reciprocates. You are blessed but you also sound like a wonderful person who knows how to compromise when necessary and probably pick your battles - if you even have any!! I am also close to your age and going on 25 years of marriage and watch little things in the marriages of my children and I realize how much I have grown and how truly unimportant some stuff is - but sometimes you just don't see it when you are younger... wisdom definitely come with age!! You are blessed! :))
No, he has a son from a previous marriage, but they have none together. nm
m
OMG you just described my entire marriage..
I am waiting for tax returns and I am OUT OF HERE!! We tried counseling, and for US, it just made it worse. We have 3 children..7, 8, and 10. They are sick of him too and have actually BEGGED me to get us out of this house. I know in my area there are a lot of "programs" to help in these situations and I am hunting them down!! Good luck to you and dont sacrifice your life to be unhappy.
I have a great marriage, and i will tell you what we do
First off, there is no "serving". I am home, so I do all the bills, take care of the kid and cook most of the meals, housework, etc. He takes care of the lawn and brings in a lot more money. He is also very helpful on the weekends. Easy enough.
We are extremely nice to each other, and I spoil him rotten but it goes both ways. The best advice I can give you is to be yourself. We go all out for birthdays, valentine's day, our anniversary and anything else we can find an excuse for.
When there is a problem or something unexpected, we split the responsibility for it or the duties that come with it. Everything is 100% equal. I believe he is the head of household in some ways, but in others, I am. That keeps me from being too much of a pushover and keeps him on the chase.
I have the same questions except it's a second marriage? SM
A friend of mine is getting married for the second time. The first time around it was a huge, and I mean HUGE, affair with an engagement party, bridal shower, bachelor and bachelorette parties, huge Catholic wedding with a huge reception with food and free booze, etc. They registered at Macy's and expected everyone to get their presents from there. There China was over $100 for a place setting!
The couple divorced and now she is getting married again and has sent out invitations to all the festivities. She's planning another huge wedding and she has registered again at Macy's! Now, personally I feel this is just wrong. I think a small tasteful wedding is in order for the second go round and I don't think it is at all necessary to register anywhere for the second wedding. How much China can one person use? I mean, she got almost everything in her divorce!
I'm sort of a down to earth, pratical kind of person so Wal-Mart dishes are fine with me, so I guess maybe I'm not the best person to understand wedding traditions and etiquette, but do I really need to go to Macy's and get another expensive wedding gift?
When I was in bad marriage, I escaped in my SM
work. Whenever he would yell, which would be all the time, I put on my headphones and escaped into my work.
Now divorced, remarried to wonderful man, daughter grown and succesful, beautiful grandchild, wonderful stepchildren, AND I AM DEPRESSED!
I dread work, I dread putting on those headphones.
Group therapy anyone?
Have you tried marriage counseling?
Would your husband be willing to go to counseling? My marriage has been very rocky, and there have been times when my husband and I separated and I really didn't think there was a chance we would get back together. We tried several marriage counselors before we found the one who worked for us. But now - after 27 years - our marriage is finally a happy one, and has been for the last 6-7 years.
But it definitely takes two. If your husband will not go to counseling, then I agree that you should move back closer to your family where you will have the support system you need. Tell your husband he can move this time to be closer to his children.
You can have a great marriage too...
To be miserable. Marriage is work, lots of work, so is parenting, but it takes 2 to get both the jobs done and done right. Talk to your husband, heart to heart, and pray...Good luck!
|