Wrong ways in life.
Posted By: Nyria on 2008-12-16
In Reply to: Since we are talking relationships on this board --- - anon
Why are you "waiting" on someone to marry you. First of all, the guy you have been with for 10 years is not marriage material. He has told you that and you are really wasting your time. The sentence "so and so could take care of me" is sad. Why don't you take care of yourself? Do not WAIT on a person to do what you should. You have 2 feet, stand on them. You need a job, to work and be self sufficient. The days of old are gone when most women stayed home and the men "took care of them." You are wasting your life staying where you are and one day you wake up past your prime and wonder what happened.
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Sounds like he's blaming everything that's wrong in HIS life
Will he go with you to see a marriage counselor? It's time he faced up to HIS issues - being overly controlling, emotionally abusive, holding you to impossible standards then blaming you for not meeting them.
If he really wants to start over, the first step should be marriage counseling, AT LEAST once a week, twice would be better. If he won't agree to that, tell him to take HIS half of the equity and get out. And don't let the door hit is @ss on the way out.
I have a life, a great life at that. I just happen to include my canine family
t
Office; Life on Mars; Lost; Life; Pushing Daisies
nm
don't know how many ways....
But I just did a consult on a patient that was suspected of having endocarditis and he was not an IV drug user. He had repeated infections with streptococcus viridans and poor oral hygiene. His oral hygiene was stated as a risk factor for endocarditis.
I am sure there are other causes as well.
Yes, you can get it other ways - sm
I have mitral valve prolapse and have to take antibiotics before any dental work or surgery, etc. to prevent endocarditis. However, IV drug abuse is the most common cause, but not the only cause.
Hope this answers your question.
I see it two ways.
I work days and my DH works nights. He sleeps during the day and I can't get in the room during the day. I have to keep my clothes, personal hygiene supplies, etc., in the linen closet so I have access to them. Also we have blankets over the windows blocking out ALL light. I would like an alternative to having the blankets on the windows for one thing.
Secondly I would almost like the second bedroom because I could go to bed when I want. Sometimes I stay up late because he gets up an hour or so after I want to go to bed.
Otherwise I wouldn't want a suite with two beds or two bedrooms.
A few ways to get around this - sm
You can make your appt the first of the day, that helps but no guarantees of course if the doctor makes rounds or if he has a long traffic filled commute, or the first appt after lunch. I find the latter is the best. I go to a dermatologist where the wait in the waiting room was 45-60 minutes; I got really sick of that and moved my appt to the first after lunch, wait time about 10 minutes. The other docs we see are very good, maybe 10-15 minutes, granted they have bad days too but not nearly as bad as those listed below 2-5 hours is just too crazy; I think anything over 30 minutes is out of hand unless there was an emergency. If I was kept waiting consistently at every appt I'd "fire" the doctor and write them a a letter saying why. --Also I would not have paid for the visit co-pay as you did, I would have just left telling them you had had it with waiting and left.
I know it's still a ways off but what do you do?
My husband informed me he will be gone Thanksgiving this year for deer hunting. It will just be my 7-year-old son and I. My parents live 4 hours a way and won't drive down for that holiday and his relatives all scatter to their various in-laws. Anyone else out there go through this? What do you do?
For those that don't go through this, I'd still love to hear what you do for Thanksgiving. I've always wanted a huge family especially for occasions like this!!
this goes both ways!....nm
nm
You ead my response wrong, terribly wrong
I am trying to ask what does she think it will help, not being nasty- tell me and I will try this. I would stand on my head and gargle peanut butter if I thought it would help - I wanted to know why a letter? They are thumbing their noses at the courts - commanded to appear- I was there and they werent.
That's all well and fine but it goes both ways
Then Christianity and even the mention of God should be kept out of all forms of government, local to federal.
I guess only Muslims can be terrorists. Was McVeigh Muslim? Stop generalizing.
Oh, and what is a mosk?
I'm sure if I was an American Muslim I would be welcome at a mosque.
I'm sure you'd welcome a Muslim with open arms into your congregation.... after he goes through the metal detector.
Okay, I'm done.
In many ways she has changed
Far from perfect but definitely better and being with Nick has definitely helped. Of course, she was just recently holding over Sharon and Brad's head their affair and could go to jail for it, so I guess that is the Phyllis you remember. I have only been watching the show for about 3 years.
There are other ways. Declawing is actually -
an AMPUTATION of the entire distal phalanx in the cat's toes; it isn't just the claw that is removed. It's one of a cat's most sensitive areas. Imagine having your finger and toe-tips amputated, and then having to walk around on them! Some cats go on to have problems afterward with their personalities, or stop using their litter-boxes because it's painful to dig. Even though an indoor cat is SUPPOSED to be indoors, unexpected things can happen: A door accidentally left ajar, a handyman forgets to close it as he dashes out to his truck for an extra tool, unknowing friends or visitors who forget to keep the door closed, or a kitty who is an escape-artist can lead to the cat getting outside. Or, in the midst of a catastrophe, such as a flood, fire, earthquake, etc., the cat could end up outside and on its own for anywhere from hours to months. Their claws are their first line of defense against attackers, and their ability to climb is often their only hope of escape.
What I do with my cat is TRIM all the claws regularly with a nail-clipper. Takes about 5 minutes, and is all she needs. Another, rather STYLISH option is using "Soft Paws". They are little plastic tips (and can come in a rainbow of colors!) that are glued to the tips of the cat's nails. They last until the outer part of the nail finally sheds. That would certainly be worth the time it took to apply.
I once adopted a rescue-kitty that had been declawed in all four feet.
Even though she was a gorgeous, purebred, show-quality chinchilla Persian, she had been in four different shelters, and kept getting returned after being adopted because of major litterbox issues. Former adopters had returned her time and again, and she had been scheduled for euthanasia when she was pulled from the shelter by a rescue organization. I adopted her, even though she was 10 yrs. old, because I knew that otherwise she'd probably spend the rest of her life in a crowded rescue setting.
Her poor little feet were so sensitive that she wouldn't let you touch them, and it took a while to get her using her litter box because didn't like to dig in the litter. Even playing was frustrating for her, as she could rarely successfully catch the toy she was chasing.
Also, depending on what state you live in, declawing may not be legal. I would suggest talking to your vet, or even a local rescue organization or other cat expert, about the different ways you could solve the problem without giving up your cats or mutilating their paws by declawing.
I feel so much for you right now. In some ways SM
our situations were the same. When you are in need of someone you are terribly vulnerable. That is how I was at the time, and this man has helped you learn about your brother, and that, too is hitting close to your heart. We tend to fall for those who rescue us, be kind to us in a hard time, etc. I know the psychologist I saw some years ago was lookin' pretty good to me, too! He was there for me, spoke kindly and told me I was worth so much. It is easy to fall, and I know that. I am afraid for you and I feel we are friends who share this. We are only human, and no one is blaming you. I just know how strong a thing this is, but believe me, and I promise this is the last thing I will post about this. . . It takes even more strength to deal with the hurt. Good luck to you, dear. Please value yourself above all else and do what is right for you.
They could research ways that
regular people could go "green." The list could show the most fuel-efficient cars, how to make and set up rain barrels and how to compost and use organic fertilizers. Then they could offer that article to all their parents' home owners associations to print in newsletters. Some churches might put it on their website or bulletin board. They could probably make and sell rain barrel setups, for that matter, and profits could be donated to charities. You know there is paint that works on plastic now, so they could use the cheapest barrels, which is likely those ugly blue plastic things, and paint them neutral colors that would blend in.
My name is one that can be pronounced two ways (sm)
My name is pronounced two different ways and can also be shortened into a nickname. People call me different things. When I go around my old family members I know what they are going to call me. He has every right to be called whatever he wants on a daily basis, but when around family members who have known you by a certain name all your life, it is very unnatural to them to try to call you something else. It seems very fake and superficial. They love him as a person, it doesn't matter what they call him. He can get by temporarily being called something else. It is no big deal.
I need persausive ways to get my
son and husband into counseling for their anger issues....threatening doesn't work.. I will speak to them about it and they will be "good" for a while but then it comes back eventually. Any ideas would be greatly appreciated!!
ps my son is 28-YO and this is a learned trait unfortunately (tried the counseling route when he was 15, husband went to one session with him and refused to go back) pulling out my hair
well of course they have paid for it in other ways.
for the poor. That's a just society. I would gladly pay $6 a gallon for gas if my health care were free and my children were going to college for free. That would be a bargain!
there are MANY ways our government
and I believe there are many people angry about the money spent on this war.
They are both amazing in different ways (sm)
There's room in the world for both of them :-)
frugal ways
I cut my own hair and my children's. I switched to a Trac fone and got rid of cell bills. Food is a huge bill of mine so I try to make every meal stretch further (leftover meals etc). No more fast food or grabbing coffee out. I take out library books instead of buying them. They even have movie rentals for the kids.
A couple of different ways to do it.
The lazy way is simply Fritos with Chili on top, but in the Lone Star, we wouldn't dare think of serving chili without fresh shopped onion and grated chedder on top, heated through really good so that when you stir it up, it melts the cheese. Other garnishes used can be lime juice on the fritos, chopped avocado and cilantro on top of the cheese. If the chili is on the spicy side, some folks put a generous dollop of sour cream on the chili before the onions and cheese.
An alternate method would be to layer Fritos, chili, onion, and cheese twice, ending up with generous cheese in a large casserole dish sprayed with cooking spray (or a 9 x 13 baking dish with one layer) and bake at 350 for 45 minutes to an hour. Let cool for about half an hour so it will set. when prepared this way, it sort of cuts in wedges.
The cole slaw is a good complement for this because it is creamy and helps take the edge off the spices in the chili.
If you imbibe, a tall, really cold longneck beer is an excellent side kick for this dish or dial it up a notch with a pitcher of frozen margaritas.
There are a few ways to disagree. You can
respectfully diagree, and you can be nasty and bash. The latter would be the troll.
boss of the ways
Here's one: When my son was 4 we were on vacation, lost, and I kept telling my husband, Go this way, go that way, etc. My son got frustrated with driving around for so long aimlessly had some ideas of his own, and yelled, "Hey, I am the boss of the ways!" He is 19 now and we still use the phrase.
Ways we save
My husband has a 401K plan and we also have mutual funds. I had a very large retirement plan with my previous employer that we rolled over and invested. We're definitely not touching any of it, but it's nice to know if we got into a huge bind we'd have the money available.
That can work both ways
I quit seeing my grandkids because of my son, their father. They were about to graduate high school. I recently saw the youngest, g'daughter at a place where she was working and tried to explain, no I did not give them up but would not come around my son, too toxic. I gave her my new number and said the road goes both ways. She and her brother both driving. Told her to give me a call. That was about 3 months ago. They live about 15 minutes from here. Did I expect a call, not really. I wish them well.
thyroid manifests in many ways
Thirty years ago, a friend's daughter, 15, was thought to be manic-depressive, having breakdown. She was diagnosed with Graves' and medication made immediate difference. Today she's a happy grandma and still doing well.
you did right, and her bratty immature ways will
nm
One of the best ways I've found to
avoid holiday stress -- a Christmas Club. The first year, we just did a $500 one - that's $10 a week. Then after that, we decided to go with a $1000 one - just $20 a week. I know it sounds like a lot, but think about how many times you pick up a $5 lunch at McD's or buy something in the grocery store you really don't need. If you pay it out of your check first (or direct deposit right into the club account), you don't even miss it.
Another way to avoid stress (I have 3 kids, so I do get stressed) for me is to have each of my kids write their lists early, usually early November, after they've had a chance to study the JCP Christmas catalog. Then I get on line starting in November to check for the early Black Friday ads. The more stuff I can cross off on Black Friday, the better for all. I have gotten great deals on Black Friday. Yes, it's sometimes stressful to get up and get those deals, but it can be done.
Lastly, I try to emphasize to my kids that it's the spirit of Christmas that's important, creating traditions to pass down. Kids appreciate that more than anything under the tree.
Plus there are ways of making that extra day
There may be temp work to be had for 1 day a week (a good way to explore other jobs). Or devote one day a week to starting a small business of your own, such as on eBay, or crafts, or doing odd jobs in the neighborhood.
Another way is to spend the day working on the house. Things there weren't time for with a 5-day workweek, like finishing that deck or BBQ pit in the back yard, or replacing a leaky toilet or faucet, painting, weatherstripping, insulating etc. There are lots of things that can: add value to the house, improve heating/cooling efficiency, etc.
Or, maybe one day a week take a class at the local junior college, trade school, etc. It could pay off in just doing something fun or interesting, or in working towards an unfinished degree, or in learning a new trade altogether.
I do both ways, wash by hand and also
clean out food particles and wash in the dishwasher. I have no reservations about doing that. The only thing I don't like are family plates set on floor and animals eating out of those and reusing. Yuck.
Spiritual in other ways aside from God. Don't attend church.
s
Save your money, other ways better spent
NM
karma doesn't have to be tit for tat...it can come in non monentary ways!
x
Ways to maintain mental health...
 Hope these make someone laugh... Makes me wish I worked in an office away from home sometimes...
Ways To Maintain Mental Health
1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. see if they slow down.
2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.
3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "In."
5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
6. In the memo field of all your checks, write "For sexual favors." (I actually do this one!)
7. Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with The Prophecy."
8. Don't use any punctuation
9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
10. Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer. 
11. Specify that your drive-through order is "To Go."
12. Sing along at the opera.
13. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.
14. Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.
15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party
because you're not in the mood.
16. Have your co-workers address you by your wrestling name, "Rock Hard."
17. When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I Won!, I Won!" 
18. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling "Run for your lives, they're loose!!"
19. Tell your children over dinner. "Due to the economy,  we are going to have to let one of you go."
20. Share this with someone else... its called therapy.
Anyone know other ways of making at-home money sm
I have been transcribing for over 12 years - and I do like the profession and I am grateful that it has allowed me to stay home with my children. But I am getting sort of burned out....and want to do something different for a while at home. Have been looking at all sorts of online sites that advertise working from home but I don't know which are legit. I know this is an MT site but does anyone do anything other than MTing that has been successful? I am thinking of maybe doing MTing part-time to stay up-to-date with it, and doing something else part-time, or maybe just taking a break from MTing for a while altogether. Any ideas would be appreciated.
Dunno, but I guess there are many ways to be an abuser/user, huh? nm
s
forget his hair - it's his school yard bully ways
.
for the life of me..........sm
I mean this just does not make any sense. I had an adjuster come out who looked to be right out of high school, looked at our roof, said it had a LOT more years left on it. I went right to the phone, called my company, said to send someone out that knew something about a roof. I got 3 estimates from roof companies and an estimate to redo one of our bathrooms where it was leaking through. When I threatened to go public with how many roofs were put on homes and checks paid in the field, at the owner's home, standing in their yard, and knew this folks didn't need a roof, then they actually gave me enough to replace our roof. If I sound bitter, I am. This is ridiculous. I cannot help a hurricane blew through, but one could argue spilling bleach in one's floor is their fault, not nature. My mother has an old home, over 90 years old. She has done the best she can with what she has, but when they came out and told her that she would have to pay a deductible to fix part of her room, and then another deductible to fix another part of her roof, because both problems didin't come from the hurricane (like they know this for fact), I blew a fuse. I went ballistic on them. She did get a check in the field from an adjuster at first, but it wouldn't even cover removing the old roof, let alone replacing it with a new one. After the hurricane, she had leaking in several rooms in her home. I pitched a hissy fit. They then came back out and I got a roofer to meet with them, and she then got enough to actually replace the roof and supposedly to fix the ceilings in her house....though I don't think it would cover all that. I called our state insurance commissioner and let into him.....I told him I would expose the garbage going on. People 1 to 2weeks after the storm getting all kinds of paid repairs, but those of us who had to wait later on down the line for an adjuster, were being told they couldn't find a problem. No, the money started flowing out like a river, and then after a few weeks, they start telling their adjusters to tell anyone else they don't see a problem. Bull!
Her life was more...
than Stephen King and John Grisham together could have conjured up. Maybe Howard Stern was a plant in her life by the millionaire's family or maybe someone else close to her was planted by his family. I don't know, but it is the most sensational story I've ever heard in my life.
life
I knew her from when she worked on the North side near the airport. She had Daniel with her at the motel not far away. I was a waitress and we had a meeting for all the employees of a new club and she came and had Daniel with her and I had my son (now almost 19) with me and they played for a bit and she would come to my house on occasion with him.
To be totally honest when in the clubs people are introduced as "family" so I dont know if her "sister" was actually her "sister".
I was a different person back then and unlike her I was able to get away from all of that. I wish things had worked out differently for her and especially for Daniel he deserved so much more.
I hope for Daniellynn??sp?? that she has her mothers spirit and tenacity and her brothers sweetness so that she can see through all this and know that her mother and brother loved her very much.
too bad; it's not WHAT you know in life..nm
Get your own life!
nm
Just another day in the life of...
I just read on MSNBC that China executed the ex-head of the Food and Drug Agency for taking bribes to okay substandard drugs citing, "Such cases have brought shame to our administration and revealed serious problems in approving antibiotics blamed for, at least, 10 deaths and other substandard medications." I sometimes wonder how much this sort of thing is going on in the rest of the world??
and Not in MY LIFE...........
Its her life though
You can't plan someone's whole life for them, or tell them they are ruining it because they have chosen a different path than you chose for them. She has to make her own mistakes and learn things in her own way. What you might call a ruined life could end up making her very happy in the long run. You do not have a crystal ball in that regard. Everyone has had a "bad boyfriend" or several and its a learning process. You can't choose who someone else is attracted to.
When I had children I realized they will not be a carbon copy of me, they will have their own experiences, feelings, etc. from day one. I made up my mind when my child was little that even though I might not like or agree with my child's life choices, I'm just going to have to grit my teeth and bear it. Its about what makes them happy, not about what makes ME happy.
Oh I want her life!
That is so cute! Anyone else allowed in that chair, or is that her's?
You know, I saw that plastic snowman in the window straight off! We had one like that when I was a kid too! I think we had a halloween decoration or two made out of that same funky chippy plastic. Very retro! Thanks for posting the picture!
She's got the life!
A vet told me years ago when I took in a young stray cat that the strays "seem to instinctively know the best places to show up" so they can have a good home. I think he's right! Looks like she picked the perfect home!
My life now could not be better
I am at a point in my life where I do not have to answer to others, can do what I want, have money to travel, don’t have to work 3 or 4 jobs to make ends meet, in fact working part now, have money in the bank, a loving husband, my daughter, family out of state. No one makes your happiness- only you can make it. I do not count on my children for happiness- I wish them well and that is all I do. They are on their own and hope they continue to be able to. I feel so blessed every day- I thank the good Lord above for my husband, he is a jewel. My daughter loves her stepfather - he had a birthday recently and she left him a message wishing him Hbirthday and tells me she is happy for my happiness. I would not wish to return to my earlier years for anything, so glad I am where I am in my life now. Totally blessed woman.
that was my life for the day, thanks.
I could see me wishing I HAD done all that preparation! If I ever go on safari, I'm taking you with me!
Life was fun up until about age 8,
and then it started getting more complicated.
From those early years I remember wonderful summer nights in Wisconsin with the windows open and cool breezes coming in, the June bugs hitting the screens, summer pajamas. I remember riding bikes and pretending they were horses. I remember shopping for fall clothes when we were lucky enough to get some instead of having them all hand-made from ugly Jiffy patterns. I remember the WI State Fair and winning 3rd and then 2nd prize in the twin contest there. I remember vacationing in cottages in Vermont when I was 4. I remember climbing our maple trees and being about 50 feet high and that was a normal thing to do.
I remember my first kiss from a boy when I was 3 and he was 2. He tried to talk me into walking down the sidewalk to watch a store being constructed and I had to explain my mom wouldn't let me do that.
From later years I remember good times camping with the girlscouts and the time we found a secret place to go near our house where there was a grove of sumacs you could sit under to get away from the world.
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