With the holidays fast approaching...
Posted By: sm on 2008-11-10
In Reply to:
I am wondering how your kids found out about Santa. My son has never led us to believe he doesn't believe, although we have wondered since he is in middle school now. I found out that he told a young cousin about the truths of Santa, E. Bunny, etc. My husband and I feel like we should approach him about this, not with the intent of being in trouble, but just to let him know that he shouldn't spoil it for the younger kids. Under the circumstances, I think he said it to be spiteful because he didn't want to go to bed for the tooth fairy to come.
I know as a child I was afraid that the holidays would cease to exist if they found out that I (the youngest) knew the truth. It was my older sibling who finally talked me into spilling the beans so no one had to get up early in the morning. I wonder if it may be a similar circumstance. Normally he is very open and honest with us and asks questions and discusses things that most other kids would find embarrasing, etc. He is a very good kid and I was very surprised to find out that he did this.
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I can see that time fast approaching...
well, not without my hubby, but the kids are getting to be moving-out age, and we see less and less of them and have more time to ourselves. I enjoy that. But in the winter, my husband works very long hours. I'm home alone all day, working or doing what I do. I have an active life away from my family and enjoy my friends and community. If I had to, I could live alone, but I really don't want to.
Now, an occasional break from the family life is always good! I do solo backpacking now and then, a weekend or several days at a time. I love living by myself with everything I need on my back. It's a real confidence builder!
We thought about approaching the ex-inmate
but we don't think it would be a good idea to have any contact with him. We're trying to keep our distance. Secondly, because this a small town, we are aware that this guy has quite a temper. He's had the cops called on him in the past for harrassing the staff at a medical center where my friend works. He's just not a stable guy.
We also talked about taking him to another league, but that would cause a problem for us next year when we try to bring him back to this league, which we want to do because my dad is going to take a team and we have 2 other children who play in this league. If we take him to the other league this year, they'll make him sit out next year before he can re-enter this league.
Thanks for your input. We are just hoping this doesn't affect our son too much.
Weatherman just said we could espect "drifts of many feet" from the approaching blizzard. sm
Being an MT, you can probably imagine the visual image that produced.
Probably a lot of MTs do that who are alone on the holidays. sm
I live alone, but am not alone, and celebrate with my family. I just get in a few hours before light is up. And maybe some later on in the evening. It works out fine. 24 hours in a day, after all.
As far as holidays go
I don't have a problem with kids being taught about different beliefs, but don't take down Christmas decorations, just add some for the other religions. Before I get blasted - this is way I feel this way:
When I was in elementary school, my best friend was Jewish. At Christmas, when she didn't participate in gift-giving, etc., it was awful for her. The kids used to tell me "don't play with her, she's weird". And when we were all singing Christmas carols, she would be in the corner doing her own thing. How awful that must've been for her!!! I don't see why my teacher shouldn't have been able to let my friend tell everyone about how she celebrates. Again, I know some don't agree, but my little friend's face when she was left out is forever burned into my memory!
Holidays
My family is spread across three different states so it is very rare that we get together for the holidays. Most holidays are spent with my husband's family which is absolutely fine because they are wonderful people who make each and every holiday a special one.
Honestly, this year, I am not worried about spend, spend, spend so much as being grateful for what we have this year as 2008 has brought a lot of lessons and blessings into our lives. I will be making homemade gifts for family vs. buying expensive presents. It is the thought that counts after all.
Holidays
I too am dreading the holidays this year, especially Thanksgiving. My son committed suicide last year the Sunday after Thanksgiving. I want to do something different this year than last. My mom wants to go out to eat and my boyfriend wants to cook at home. I can never make them both happy. Christmas will be a challenge too as my boyfriend is laid off. Luckily, my family is small so there aren't a lot of gifts to buy.
Need help fast!
Is there a way to get a certified copy of a birth certificate in a couple days? Other than driving to the county where you were born? I live in California and I have looked at some websites but the fastest I can see is 3-5 days and I need it in like 1-2. Any help is appreciated!
Not so fast!
Your return only equals about "10% or so" assuming that the stock or fund you pick stays flat or goes up in price. If you lose money on the stocks, the 100 bucks they give you at the end may not even get you to break even. You also have to subtract the cost of your trades. 10% a year is a killing in this market.
You can learn to read charts & screen stocks at www.clearstation & www.morningstar.com.
You have to have a strong stomach to be invested in anything other than a passbook savings account right now unless you are in a VERY conservative fund, in which case there is no way you are going to make 10%.
Rule of thumb is the closer you are to retirement, the more conservative the fund has to be. The further out from retirement you are, the more time you have to make up your losses (and there WILL be losses).
So be very careful. I hope you're not planning on day trading.
As fast as I could! nm
nm
working holidays.
I am working Thanksgiving, schedule just fell that way. As far as Christmas goes, I'm am also scheduled to work, didn't request it off, but I work 3rd shift. I did request to work Christmas Eve and New Year's Eve to have a couple of days off for my brother's wedding that is 12/30. Working holidays doesn't bother me too much since I'm 3rd shift, but I could see how it would be a pain for those who are required to work and work days or 2nd.
working holidays
I'm right there with ya! Love that holiday pay! lol
Sadness at the holidays sm
Hi, tried E-mailing you but they would not accept it. I have had horrible Christmas stories such as yours, with parents, a younger sister dying and a dear pet who got killed on New Years Eve. One New Years my husband was in a horrible accident and I had to care for him at home in a hospital bed, then 2 mos. later my trusted surgeon diagnosed me with breast cancer. I am not a born again (although there's nothing wrong with that) but I do believe in prayer and that when you're this low only a higher power or spirituality can get you out of it. You can't do it alone. Just venting on the board should help you. Just know that others have walked in your shoes and relate to you and hopefully are praying for you as they read your post. Believe me, although all looks pretty bleak right now, you will come out of this and things will get better. My thoughts and prayers are with you this day. I had a horrible day yesterday. One of my DIL's has been giving me a hard time for 20 years and she did it again to me and is coming tonight. I went to church alone last evening and prayed for the grace to get through this evening. I lit a candle and prayed to St. Jude (the patron St. of the impossible, I believe). I am not angry anymore and I know I can face her with dignity and strength, no matter what else she does to me. She's a bully and I feel sorry for her, that she can't see how bad she is. I know I'm going to be okay. Your situation is different, I know, I lost my younger sister to cancer, the Christmas was awful knowing she was dying. My Dad also was on Hospice at Christmas and my whole family was fighting. But I'm here this morning writing to you and praying that you will find the strength to get through it all. "Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger" and that's the truth! All my best, and a prayer from my lips to God's ears for you, your family and your pet (I love animals)! God bless you. Still kicking and well - 6 years out, docs scratching their heads - ? misdiagnosed).  There is something greater than ourselves out there - just ask for strength - you'll get it, you'll see!
Man-made holidays...
but you are all so quick to forget that the Bible from which you quote from was in fact man made as well.
And if we are to only quote by the Bible as to what rules to follow to get into Heaven, you exclude a ton of other religions who believe they will get into Heaven or where ever based upon their man-made books as well!
Is the Bible the only true verse? If so, then Christians are the ONLY true believers and will be the only ones to get into Heaven. Bull...
Like I always said though, whatever floats your boat.
Me personally, I do not want anyone in my room preaching to me on my death bed unless I personally asked them to do so.
You mean the glitz is only for the holidays?
Gosh, I have sweaters and blouses I wear some of them year round and they have the bling aspect. I love it.
celebrate the holidays!
You are a very mature, thoughtful person. Just enjoy the holidays and if he is as mature as you are, it should not matter. Go celebrate!
For holidays in my family-
My family, which consists of two brothers, two sisters, many nieces and nephews who are all married and have children and my son, daughter-in-law and granddaughter, started several years ago having our Thanksgivng and Christmas holidays on the Saturday before the actual holiday. That way, they can all stay for the day and then spend the actual holiday with the other side of the family. It works out really well. We really enjoy having everyone stay for the day and they don't have to run around on the holiday either.
My husband's family is another story, ugh! We are expected to be there on Thanksgiving day at noon, Christmas eve at 6:00 p.m. for an immediate family Christmas and then Christmas Day with the entire family. In addition, I always work Thanksgiving and Christmas. It makes for an exciting couple of days. They won't change anything...it's family tradition. Whatever!
Good luck with your plans.
upcoming holidays
Does anyone get stressed out and/or depressed during the holidays? I am already starting to feel down because of finances and the stress Christmas puts on us to spend spend spend, and also just family issues. I never had a Hallmark family, that's for sure. The whole thing is kind of depressing to me.
Holidays - Bah humbug!
I have nice holiday memories. My mom was not the Martha Stewart type but they were filled with lots of food, friends, and family. Very happy times. This will be the first year that I cannot go home for the holidays. We will still spend it with my husband's family but it is not the same for me.
I am also stressing about the holidays because his family is all about the presents and I grew up differently. His family says they are cutting back this year but I wonder what that means. To them, it is probably only $500 per person. I know its the thought that counts and you should only do what you can but I still feel bad and guilty if we cannot do for everyone else. I have suggested putting a limit or drawing names or making gifts to exchange but they look at me like I speak a foreign language.
This is the first year my husband and I will not exchange gifts for each other and our son won't get much either. To top off the financial crisis facing the entire nation, we are also expecting a child in the very early spring so that has added to our expenses and dipping into our savings.
For me this winter came very quickly as well which does not help. I haven't had time to ease into my least favorite season. It's been so gloomy the last few weeks I am glad that I don't have to leave the house to work but know I should leave the house occasionally to feel better. I just want to be a scrooge right now. Soon enough I'll have to put on the happy thanksgiving face to spend the afternoon with my in-laws while missing my family.
Birthdays with holidays.
Sometimes I like that the birthdays are around the holidays because then I can buy extra stuff and look at it all and decide how to split it up between the 2. Other times, like this year, we don't have much $ so I would really prefer them to be separated more but can choose that one!
My husband normally leaves the lights on all night. Turn on when he gets home from work and off in the morning...not this year. I think its reasonable to just do a few hours each evening. I don't think we'll put up as many as we normally do either. Usually we line all the windows, roof, bushes, etc. Probably keep it simple this year.
Holidays are hard
My parents were divorced so my sister and I spent many years shuffling between two houses. When we each got married and had our own families the situation got even more complex. My parents are now deceased and my sister and I are estranged (even though we live in the same town), so in some ways life has gotten simpler. I still get very emotional and depressed around the holidays because of my dysfunctional childhood and negative expectations, but I don't have as much guilt and stress anymore.
My husband's parents and family are back in our hometown 600 miles away, and for the last few years he's gone back there for Thanksgiving and/or Christmas with our youngest child. I don't begrudge him that because his folks are elderly and I don't want him to have any regrets later. I can't go with him because we have a lot of animals to take care of, and frankly, I'm really comfortable just hanging out at home with them anyway. We have adult kids too, and two grandchildren, and I encourage all of them to live their lives without the burden of guilt and feelings of obligation. If they can come by and have dinner or visit that's great, and if not BIG DEAL. Honestly, it's just a day. Things got easier for us when we realized we didn't necessarily have to celebrate a holiday on the exact day it was scheduled.
I really understand your not wanting to let your mom down, and I would feel the same way. Your husband is a big boy and has made a choice, so that's on him, not you. He's probably being a bit immature and stubborn on this one. I hope you'll extend the invitation to your husband one more time, then go to your mom's and enjoy yourself whether he comes along or not.
Did you go into debt over the holidays?
C'mon, fess up!
Did you use credit to buy things for the holidays, or did you pay in cash?
I'm happy to report that for the 13th year, we paid in cash.
not in the fast lane
It doesn't really matter what lane I'm in, but in fact I hardly ever drive in the fast lane. I always move over for people who want to pass me because I figure, That's the guy who's going to keep me from getting a ticket. The point I'm making is that they ride my butt when they were getting off the freeway anyway. I go to the trouble of moving over, & then I see them in front of me, pulling off at the next exit. Like they couldn't have just gotten off while they were still behind me without having to make the big macho statement, or if they were so bent on passing me, there is normally at LEAST one lane to my left that they are welcome to use, since they are almost always going over the speed limit. And on the rare occasions when I am in the fast lane, if someone is riding me I ALWAYS move over. Always.
Jeez. I didn't expect to have anyone get in my face over such a benign thread.
Run, run fast and don't look back!!!!
Being a step-mom to kids who have no idea what the meaning of respect is SUCKS. Especially when the father has no interest in teaching them! Been doing it for almost 10 years now, don't put yourself through it. If he doesn't "get it" after this he probably never will, and will never change.
I'm headed nowhere - fast. Or perhaps to
We had DVR'd it and just fast forwarded
through that part.
We clerical help to them. Yes I work holidays, sm
because I enjoy and count on the holiday pay. But I NEVER make the mistake of thinking that I am really a part of patient care, or my immediate turn around of a document is that important. It is important to the bottom line of the company, but not to patient care. There is absolutely nothing I produce, even in producing documentation of trauma or critical care, that has anything more to do with anything other than company profits. I come to believe this when I get reports, simple discharge summares, on patient who were discharged months ago, and the doctors mark it as a "Stat". LOL. ok. If you think you are that important, then you have been conned.
I never work on major holidays...
because I work for a small company that closes for all major holidays. I've been with them for almost 2 years now and they are definitely one of the best! They even send me a Christmas gift every year! I would never sign up to work for a company that was open on holidays, as I have no desire to work on holidays.
Since when do men deal with all the details of holidays and
x
Back away now, and do it fast. Then you will find out. I think he is not the one, but you sm
will learn quickly. (he sounds like a jerk to me).
Netflix -- fast. Love it.
nm
Mine also, and I go very fast driving over them
and hold my breath or pray pretty much. Years ago my sister had gone over a bridge traveling to Tennessee just before it collapsed and I never forgot it.
On the news today they said something like 70,000 bridges in the country are in disrepair. I say put our taxes to better use! Do something constructive for a change.
Scary stuff.
No stead-fast or gal or man or whatever, this one has improved
.
is there a reason you were in the fast lane?
haha since that was my pet peeve, i had to ask... i mean i may be the one riding your butt if #1) you are going BELOW the posted speed limit or #2) there is NO ONE in the other lanes you are passing!!
and you know... you NEVER know why people are going fast. Sometimes they are just irresponsible, but sometimes they may be heading to somewhere that constitutes an emergency for them you know? not that they should put others in danger but i have learned to come to that conclusion...
Run away fast from this tramp and don't look back! nm
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It would grow old real fast for me - sm
so I can understand you being annoyed, and no it is not heartless. Is he short on cash? Can he afford to feed himself? Obviously is money is an issue then it is a different story. Were you very close before the divorce or is this new behavior? I presume the GF does not want him there for dinner presuming it is a loneliness issue for him. But as you said he is probably keeping an eye on your mom since he asks about her every day, I would presume the divorce was her idea? Or is he having buyers remorse? I would set some ground rules for dad and tell him as much as you enjoy seeing him, etc, that you need some nights to yourself, and to limit it to maybe 3 days a week, MWF or something like that. So he still gets to see you (and stalk your mom) but not monopolize every evening. Or else starting making things you know your dad dislikes!
Thank goodness for fast forward on DVR! - sm
One word - LAME!!
Not only around Christmas but other holidays as well. Things that can't be explained any other w
nm
Nah - it's not you. Many people are "crabby" and unpleasant around the holidays!
Just think, you probably put a smile on their face when they opened that card. Just because they don't smile at you, does not mean you did not touch them in some meaningful way.
Feel good about yourself, you did a great thing.
Some people find the holiday season very difficult to get through, either depressed, loss of a loved one, and so on. Some do not even realize they are "crabby".
It is just like when you go Christmas shopping and everyone you meet in the mall or store are in a hurry, bump into you without even saying "excuse me" and just plain ole miserable.
Just keep smiling and being your happy self. Don't worry too much about it.
Happy Holidays to you! Here's a hug :-)
i'm athiest and I agree. Christian holidays have been
easter bunny, santa claus. It almost seems like businesses are exploiting your beliefs by pressuring you into buy bigger, buy more for your family than you did last year.
I like it cold for the holidays. Was in Florida last week and...sm
it just did not feel like Christmastime (temps in the 70s--not that I was complaining). However, I wish the temps here in WA State would get above freezing so that I can get my Christmas/birthday shopping done. Some roads are still a sheet of ice. Your 40-50 degrees sound perfect to me.
Does anybody know what helps get rid of fever blisters really fast. I just got some and they are
not very nice looking on my lips.
Get her professional help fast. Maybe family counseling. SM
Sometimes it just isn't one person in the family who has a problem. That came out badly, since I didn't mean you or any one in family in particular. Just dynamics of family life.
Best wishes to you. You will need a great deal of strength, but you can all come through this even closer as a family.
LOL! Good suggestion, they would leave you alone fast!...nm
nm
I am betting the good MTs make a lot more than you do, with paid holidays, too.
x
My family decided last year to just enjoy the holidays
We're all adults, no children, and live in small homes or apartments. I NEED tons of stuff, but have no place to put much of anything, and can't afford to reciprocate with a gift. Same with a couple other siblings. My mom's been impossible to buy gifts for, for probably the last 10 years. I was the first to bow out the year before last. I started the ball rolling because I just plain couldn't afford it anymore, and was too busy working all the time to spend hours on end in a department store. I had a new job, no PTO, and NO money, so I alerted everyone that I wasn't going to play the game that year. Turns out it was a relief to all! And last year, without all the holiday 'getting mauled at the mall' disasters, each of us had quiet, happy, stress-free holidays. So now that we've eliminated the gift-giving aspect of Christmas, I finally can look forward to the season and enjoy it again.
I'm praying that you get this poor animal to a doctor and fast!
It's your responsibility as Misha's owner to get her medical attention when she needs it. Please do that.
I hope she's okay too.
Slim-Fast here but I'll give ya my support.
Let's keep all each other posted on the progress. I also would like to lose 30 lb.
15 years, no weight gain, I walk a lot, fast.
nm
Many posts hafta read fast cause they are pulled if
x
Classic sign of an abusive is a very , very fast romance - sm
leading to marriage, which it appears you have done. He has successfully isolated you from your family and controls everything you do. He is deciding where you live, what "he" wants to do, work, etc. You don't mentions kids, and I hope you don't have any, but if you do you need to take back some control if you intend to stay in this one-sided marriage. Sounds like you have no say/input at all, it is his way or no way. My DH gives me grief when I visit my family, as do my in-laws, I go anyway. He doesn't like it but he cannot stop me from going. He knows better than to try. He will make my life living hell until I leave, trying to get to stay, but I think only one time did I give in and not go, and boy was I mad at him for quite some time (and myself for giving in). My DH is very passive-aggressive but most of the time I ignore him but other times he gets me all worked up ready to kill him and then he is fine, and I am all mad. Drives me crazy. But after 12 years of this I have learned not to take the bait so much, and have seriously though of kicking him out, though he's refuse to leave as it "is his house" (it is in his name only but we bought it 10 years ago while we were married, so it is every bit mine as his). So if you get to the point when you are sick of his controlling ways, go see a lawyer. I plan to soon myself just to see where I would stand in the event of a divorce. We both have our faults in my marriage and I think it is smart thing to find out what could or could not happen in the event of a divorce. You might want to see what your rights are too, cannot hurt. As for your sister coming, just say, Mary is coming to visit and tough cookies if this bothers you. She has never been here before and I want to see my sister and niece and if you don't like it make yourself scarce while they are here. ---Good luck.
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