Who's jealous? I'm not overweight. I just choose not to dress
Posted By: SM on 2009-02-25
In Reply to: Don't be jealous of those who are thin...most CAN do something about their weight if they tried. - nm
like a prostitute, or someone proud of their anus hairs - lol. I've obviously struck a nerve with you though... Don't worry, you'll grow out of it someday and realize you're worth more than that.
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So does my cat. She is overweight. Actually,
xx
Thanks - other than being overweight
He's healthy. He could stand to lose about 50 pounds (but I could stand to lose about 75 pounds) I understand the question of Alzheimers/dementia. I didn't make that real clear in my last post. It's not stories that he repeats over and over, its just what he wants to do. Like he'll come out and say he thinks we should move to another location (larger town where there is more work), then he'll come in 5 minutes later with all this stuff he found on where he thinks we should move to, then about a half hour later he'll come in talking about the same area, and 1/2 hour later comes in telling me more stuff about the area. To me it's a repeat over and over and over. This is all while in the middle of me trying to work, then he gets mad and says I'm not interested cos he's the only one finding the info and I have to be involved blah, blah, blah. So, it's not really a repeat of stories like that, just more of a discussion of the same topic over and over and over. But I understand exactly what you were thinking. If it could only be that easy. I've had close family members (an aunt had dementia, and a grandfather had Alzheimer's) and I helped family take care of them and I'll tell you...that was a lot easier than this is. It's probably harder because he doesn't have them and he thinks he's sane and this is normal. I did tell him once, fine, lets pack up everything up the following week and move and then he got all p!ssy at me and told me forget it if I was going to have that attitude. I said to him all I keep saying is lets take a drive there, lets do more research, then make the move wisely and not just jump. As for the other issues of doom and gloom and end of the world scenarios...well I told him life has to go on and that's what I told him. I always hear people say prepare for the worst and hope for the best (think that was in a movie), but I just can't live like everything is going to end in the next couple days. There has got to be some hope.
Being overweight. I'm not
happy with the way I look or feel & am very self-conscious about it.
Being overweight sure is a choice, just like sm
smoking cigarettes or doing drugs is a choice. If you are making the right food choices, exercising, drinking water, or even following a Weight Watcher's plan, you will lose weight, unless you have a problem with one of your organs where you retain "water weight". I, quite frankly, am tired of people sitting around asking "how do I lose weight" when they are not making good food choices and not staying active? If you have trouble with arthritis, then you can do aqua therapy (get in a pool even if it is heated). Anything that gets your heart rate up is exercise. The "government" is not at the grocery store holding your hand or at that fast food restaurant making you buy those burgers. I'm sorry, but that is JMO. 
Unfortunately most men say that to women who are overweight.
Pay more attention to who he is checking out/drooling over on TV - bet it isn't Roseann Barr or Camryn Manheim! lol
I'm not overweight or a smoker,
and since I'm not an addict, I can see clearly. Smoking makes no sense, which is why people are trying to educate children, who then assume you don't understand the risks and try to educate you. Logic states that if you understood the problems tobacco causes, you would not smoke. That is why kids are kind to you and try to educate you on the subject.
I have a very overweight beagle....sm
She just went to the vet the other day and he didn't seem too concerned. She weighed 40 pounds. She weighed 30 before being spayed. I told him she barely eats much. There is no way the weight can come from overeating. He said she is fixed right? I said yes. He said well that happens sometimes. They gain a lot of weight due to the hormone changes. I knew it had to be that cause she didn't get like that until we had her spayed. So I figured that was it and it is. So he said not really much you can do. She is very lazy though. My husband said put her out in the backyard and make her get some exercise. Well the backyard is fenced in so I put her back there and she lays out in the grass and looks at me after going potty. I said come on get up and play. She just looks at me like I can be lazy inside or lazy outside but I am going to be lazy. LOL
I was "only" 65 lbs overweight with 2nd pregnancy...
but I was so horribly ill with 24-hour morning sickness that I walked out of the hospital 12 pounds lighter than I was at the beginning of my pregnancy. I certainly wouldn't recommend that method of weight loss! I was in and out of the hospital the entire time of my pregnancy for dehydration and IVs. Every moment of that pregnancy was a struggle with food; thinking about it, trying to keep it down, worrying about the baby.
In the end, it worked out. He was born 2 weeks early and was 8 lbs, 2 ozs. Within 24 hours I was eating like a horse again, and I was great while nursing for 6 months. But eventually, the glory days of eating and not gaining weight were gone. Now, 17 years after that pregnancy, I'm 80 pounds overweight. Sigh.
Why do very overweight/obese women
wear tops that show all the bulges and fat rolls that they have. It does not look good and I just do not get it. It looks like the tops are about 2-3 times too small. Any answers on this?
I am confident but also overweight and I have the common sense
to not wear clothing that I look like a sausage in. I have upper arms that do not look good in short sleeves so I do not wear. I do not think it has anything to do with confidence, I definitely am not short on that and admire myself in good looking clothes but I know what and what does not fit properly. Any woman who likes her fat rolls showing, her midrift bulging and several different bellies hanging down all at once does not ooze confidence to me, rather seems like they are insecure and dressing so maybe someone might notice.
I agree, depends on face shape....I'm not overweight
but I have a fat face! lol
I agree! Many kids are overweight, lazy and don't want to work hard for anything!
Good luck to them in the working world...how many do you think will actually do well? It's a scary thought.
I am jealous of you
I am jealous of all of you......
I have 2 of the most standoffish cats on the planet. Lucky is my 3-year-old female that I rescued at 3 weeks of age or so when her mother abandoned her and her sibling. I bottle fed her and everything...most pitiful thing you have ever seen.. You'd think she'd be a little grateful. No, she's not. At least she has stopped biting now that she is more mature. I accidently tripped over her in the dark one night on my way to bed...she raced me upstairs, ran under my bed and bit my foot as I was getting into bed.
Tripp is my almost 1 year old male and he a little more sociable. Right now, he is sleeping on the couch in my office, which is what he usually does in the afternoons. He loves to play, but hates to be handled or petted. He actually ducks when you go to pet him. We've had him since he was a kitten, so no history of abuse. Just needs his space, I guess. I've always had cuddly cats it the past, so these two are a disappointment to me in that department. But I love them anyway.
I'm SO jealous!
I'm in Texas and we are pushing 90 degrees! 
jealous
I'm probably the most jealous, insecure woman in the world. No way would my husband be that close to a woman, job or not. I'm ashamed of the fact now, but DH and I had a very long-term affair before we divorced and married each other. He is a bartender and I know exactly how people stray. Has everything to do with both the person and the environment. Put anyone in a conducive environment and see what happens. No one is immune. If people think so, they are fooling themselves. I'm not a kid anymore - 52 - talking from experience. Blast away, ladies - like I said, I'm ashamed now, but still remember vividly!
I'm jealous!
Here in the south, we can't even get rain, much less snow! Enjoy some for me...I'm jealous...
I AM SO JEALOUS!!!! nm
nm
I'm Jealous!!!!!
x
Sorry, that was mean. I'm just jealous
mm
Dress
Every year they change the rules in those bride books. At my daughter's wedding, which was semi-formal, but outside (????? is this congruent?????) the mother of the groom wore white! My one pet peeve is that the mothers not wear white too! However she is a tacky woman, so what should I have expected? She was given the color scheme and the bride's mother has first choice, was asked not to wear white or pants, but not only did she wear white, she wore pants! May I add that she looked ridiculous because she chose some hippie-dippie flowing cotton things that would have looked okay at a parade or a yard sale, with huge pantaloon legs and wore flip-flop like sandals. (Pain is still coursing through my body from this faux pas 12 years later). But, having done this before more than once I found that at Nordstrom's they have wonderful salespeople and great dresses and they will bring you things to the dressing room that suit you and your budget just tell them basically what you want and what you want to spend. Stay away from bridal stores, they try to sell you "bridesmaid dresses" and will ooh and ahh over you even if you look like a clown and most of the dresses show too much skin or have ruffles and bows attached in all the wrong spots if you are over 23. I took my daughter whom I trust to know me and what I like as well as what looks best on me. Good luck! Hope your new in-laws are more fun than mine! They are still tacky, but then I rarely see them! 
Red dress or no dress.
Having a guest book attendant is popular in the South and is supposed to be an honour. Here is a website with some info but it does say coordinate color somewhat.
Given the circumstances, if she really felt uncomfortable with what you are wearing, I would keep it pleasant, it is after all her day and you might feel the same way if in her shoes. I myself would just explain to the bride (especially if you were asked to hold this position until the last minute)...
"I am honored that you have asked me to participate in your wedding, but since I was not expecting this, the red dress is the only one that I brought with me and I honestly cannot afford to purchase a new one right now. If you are still uncomfortable with me wearing this however, I would truly understand if you would like to choose someone else for the position."
That will leave the ball in her court. If she wants to offer to buy you one, so be it. The choice is strictly hers.
Wikipedia had some interesting info on the colors. Red for auscpiousness meaning luck or promising, and how white was originally for mourning and blue was the color associated with purity.
It should not matter to her as long as you don't outshine her. If anything guests will be talking "bad" about you not her, and in that case I wouldn't give a flip!
How about help her with a dress? sm
The dresses are extremely expensive and maybe if you could help financially with the dress of her choice, that would make her day the most memorable as well as beautiful pictures. She basically needs to feel like a queen.
You could pay for her to get manicure/pedicure, buy her jewelry, pay for picture setting at a photography studio, or school pics if someone else is not, pay for her to get her hair done or makeup done.
Ultimately, you cannot control the eating that day and activities unless you teamed up with her date and coordinated that with him to make sure he could afford a really nice place or pay for it for them.
I would suggest you going down and setting up a time before their prom activities to take some really good photos of them, play ones, serious ones, etc depending on their relationship. Just went through 2 proms recently with my DD and our pics we got are way better than any of the school pics. Sending them to Walmart to be printed as soon as I figure out what I want! Their pic packages are really reasonable. You could even put together a photo album of pics for her for later of her special day. Email me if you like, we have some adorable pics of my DD.
Jealous of what? Because she can drive
NM
Of course they choose the most vulnerable--sm
women to prey on. If they chose a stronger woman, their controlling ways would not work. My ex did the same thing regarding the counselor. He went to two visits, said the counselor was a quack, and he would not go back. Anything that was ruined or destroyed during his anger fits were my things...never his.
as far as leaving...I had three kids to take care of, and survival was an issue for me too, but it can be done. Please do not just stick around because you fear not being able to take care of yourself and your kids. You are basically doing that now and you would have less stress to deal with. My kids were small too, two in school and one not. I HAD to do it, or I would be dead today. My ex husband never changed his ways...never. He took his own life when he could not control his last wife the way he controlled the others. I would never say this to my kids, as they were devastated when he took his own life, but between you, me, and the fencepost (Lord forgive me), I feel he was a coward. Rather than change his ways to make HIMSELF happy, he chose to end his *suffering*, with no regard to who he left behind to deal with their own suffering. It is hard. It is a big step to leave, but it gets better with time. Trust me on that. I make good money now and take care of ONLY me. My kids are grown and on their own, all with anger issues of their own, and I worry about that. But please, please, don't stay where you are just because you fear not being able to take care of yourself. God provides. Just ask. and that is the truth. good luck to you. If you wish to email me, you can. God Bless you and yours. May he give you strength and peace. You deserve nothing less.
We do have a choice. We can choose to keep our
undies on and not engage in sex or we can choose some form of birth control (albeit it fails from time to time).
CHOOSE not to take it so personally
The key word here is "elderly" - remember she is the one with the ailment - and she's not THINKING this might hurt Kimmie's feelings. She's frustrated with the problem and the fact that what you got didnot work for her - and she's probably being considerate in paying you.
Have you considered that you may be looking for reasons to be offended?
You can CHOOSE to see this whatever way you want. If you feel real hurt was intended then you deal with that directly: Aunt ___ I felt a bit hurt by your response to ____.
COMMUNICATION is a great thing when we do it - and it always takes at least two.
Good luck! P.S. what was the stuff you got her? I might be able to use it!! :)
Whatever it is you choose to wear...
just make sure it compliments the bridal party's ensemble.
It doesn't necessarily have to be a solid color, but if you choose a dress with floral patterns, make sure it doesn't clash too much with the MOB or the rest of the bridal party.
Go here (but in case it does not show) Smarter.com and search mother of the groom dress. It will give you several online stores. At least you can get an idea of what you might want.
http://www.smarter.com/---se--qq-mother%2Bof%2Bthe%2Bgroom%2Bdress.html
I'm jealous, I wish I had such an account
as a secret one so I could sock away some extra $$ !!!
Sounds like he is jealous (sm)
It sounds like he is craving your attention and just jealous of the younger sister to me. I think it is normal for kids their age to talk like that. I can't even tell you how many times my cousins and I and my sister and I said that about each other and there was anywhere from 1-5 years age difference. It was almost always over someone getting more attention and/or praise or something like that.
Aw - Poor Lil Ole You - Jealous, huh? (nm)
x
jealous...congrats wish it were me
Keep me posted...I want to know everything.
People get jealous sm
If you are doing well, I find people, especially other women, get jealous and mean. I literally knocked myself silly for a neighbor, I cannot tell you how many things I have gone overboard for her because the family was going through tough times. I even lost valuable time working and had to pull all nighters. She called me one day and said, "We can't all be you up in your office."Various other things were said that cut me to the core. I helped her run a fund raiser when she obviously did not know how to do it and it was a huge success and she took all the credit (at church). I was a true friend to her and gave my all. A plain thank you note or word would have done. The worst scenario was when I went in for surgery on my breast and she never called to see how I was. I called her and told her my biopsy was non-cancerous as the first came back DCIS, and she just said, "hmmm" as if "who cares." I'm done with false friends. From now on I only depend on myself or my DH, hurt too many times. She also told me she does not make thousands of dollars at a time, well, you have to work your buttocks off and by the time Uncle Sam and all the rest get paid, it's not always thousands. They are jealous because we are entrepeneurs in our own right, I guess. If they only knew - but they don't!
HMR is better - and you can pick and choose
My mother got NutriSystem and most of the meals are unpalatable and I can eat about anything (some were okay). HMR is actually good. Difference is breakfast consists of shakes/cereal.
We have 9 to choose from, not including
xx
and I have to confess, I am a little bit jealous of them.
I think it would be so much easier to live with a woman than a man. No more History Channel or freakin Dirty Jobs!
P.S. as you are divorced, it is YOU who can choose
with whom of your in-laws your children have contact.
Bridesmaid dress
My cousin is getting married in a few months and is in the process of picking out her bridesmaid dresses. Her dress has cranberry trim on it, so she wants our dresses to be that color and she also wants them to be long. I went to the boutique with her and she showed me her top three choices.
1. floor length satin, strapless with a straight skirt.
2. floor length chiffon and satin with spaghetti straps, also with a straight skirt.
3. tea dress (mid calf) satin with a butterfly beading design, netting under the skirt, bow tie spaghetti straps.
If you were the bride, which dress would you pick for the bridesmaids?
Really, what do they dress like, the Amish?
Or wear a burqa/burka? LOL
Complete with red dress...
Weddings have become such shows...it's ridiculous! I've been to 2 weddings in 2 weeks, neither one too showy, but just money spent on silly little things (no programs!) like bubbles to blow at the bride and groom, which no one was left by the time they left...candies with their names on them, etc. Boy, can't wait til my DD gets married! 
I'm drunk enough now to tell you that you may have my dress,
but you will never have my hat!!!!!
He didn't see me in it, but he saw my MOM in the dress.
I wore my mother's dress, and her wedding pictures were displayed in our house. So he saw the dress before we were married. I don't think that counts. :)
I believe we are still free to choose our battles here.
Just because you are an all-or-nothing gal doesn't mean I have to be!
:)
I feel bad for you but did she choose DNR status?
My father died last year and he was a DNR and had a Living Will stating *no heroic measures* - at that point they oinly do *comfort care*.......
Very sorry for your experience!!!!! *gentle hug*
Choose the correct path
You are walking down a road and you encounter a fork in the road and you do not know the correct way to go. There are two men standing at the junction and both know the correct road. One man always lies, and the other man always tells the truth, but you do not know who is the liar and who is the one who tells the truth. You can only ask each man one question, but it must be the same question for both. What is the question that would allow you to get the information necessary to choose the correct path?
Mexico is jealous of Miss USA
Speaking of bilingual signs....call any customer service number, including Social Security, and what do you hear.
I say press 1 for English, otherwise hang up!!!
Not so much jealous, as they just can't get a handle on why things
m
I have a MIL who was jealous of any time I spent - sm
with my family. It caused a lot of hurt feelings on her side, and just made me angry for the most part. You don't sound anything like my MIL though but it sounds like you did not push the issue and fight for the right to see your grandchildren. In my situation, I married 1 of 2 sons. The other has never married or had any children. We have the only grandchildren for my MIL. She was manic that we have kids though she was vastly disappointed when we had girls and has remarked on this several times in the past. It is true we trusted my mom over her in terms of childcare, etc. though my mom rarely watched the kids as she lived 4 hours away. I did visit my mom at least 4-6 x a year, but I would drop in and visit my MIL and my FIL almost every time as I literally drove right by their house on the way up to my parents. My DH rarely calls his parents, I usually call his mom once a week and chat for a while. She used to never call but lately has taken to calling every 2 weeks or so. We also used to see his parents at least once a month for at least 5 years (now it is every 6-8 weeks), day visits, while my parents only saw the kids 4-6 x a year, though I would stay anywhere from 2-5 nights when I visited. This where the jealously came into play. I was/am very close to my parents and my brothers, much like your DIL I suspect. But I was exceptionally close to my mom, when she died almost 3 years ago my world fell apart. But my MIL was always jealous of my relationship with my mom, it drove her nuts I think. My DH tried to explain to her how close were were but she just could not understand and it caused her (and me) many problems. I would catch such grief from his family when I told them I was going to see my parents/friends, it was as if they wished I did not have a family. Holidays were horrible though we did do an alternating schedule though she would argue with me about that. Things a lot different now as she now gets to be the only grandma, which I am sure she loves. My stepmother is actually better with the kids though and has a great time with them, though I will never be close to her either. My in-laws get just about all the holidays now since my mom is gone and my stepmom wants to be with her kids not her husbands, so I don't get so see my family much anymore, maybe 2 x a year. Much more complicated these days, though we still don't let them (my in-laws) have the kids as they lack in common sense bigtime when it comes to what is safe and smart for my kids. I am not saying that is the case with you as I don't know your particulars of course. But it sounds like you just gave up. I would not try buying your son's love as it sounds like you did try. I know my in-laws tried though we were up front with them with one money gift they gave us that enabled us to pay off our truck in 1 year instead of 4, that it would not buy them weekends with the kids, etc. We told them that if there were strings we did not want the money. Money does not buy love as the Beatles said, very true. I would write back your granddaughter and say you would like to have a new beginning with her and the past is over and done with , and if she ever does want to know the real story, tell her. As for your son, have you even called him and invited him to your new home, it does not sound like it. Sounds like you expect a lot and are upset because they don't do the same for you as they do for the daughter's parents. The daughter controls the kids for the most part (as do most women) so it is to be expected that her family gets their "favor" more. You need to step up and be assertive. My in-laws do do most of the visitings here (we have actually never invited them here, they just call us and say that they are coming down on such and such a day, kind of aggravating), we rarely go up there as my DH just hates going there and really does not like his parents due to a bad upbringing. They really did a number on him. Does your son have any anamosity towards you? Did something bad happen in the past? You are long overdue for a long talk with him though. But I work hard to keep the lines open with them as much as I don't like doing it, I do it. My kids love them and I would never deprive them of that. I hope you take the first step and write to your granddaughter again, and call you son. You have absolutely nothing to lose at this point. Good luck.
You are all so creative! I need help! I will choose the best answer sm
and so I hope you can help us!! My husband and I teach an adult Sunday School class married couples class. We need to come up with a catchy name to put in the bulletins, on-line, on the screen in the sanctuary to let others know about our class. We can't come up with anything! One couple suggested Married Rockstars! How hilarious is that? Of course, my husband and I don't look anything like rock stars. Couples of all ages and personality types come to the class. Can you think of anything?? It's been 2 weeks since we've been trying to come up with something! The ages range from 25-45 or so. Thank you so much!!!!!!!! 
If she wants to choose whether or not a baby results from sex
then she better choose to block that sperm from reaching the egg, because if it does, well then, a baby may very well result from sex. I mean, I understand when it's very, very early, but come on, abortion has really been taken way, way too far, to the point of murder of a full-fledged baby, and some people think, hey, that's okay, it's the mother's decision.
We all have a right to choose how we spend our time (sm)
If that makes you happy then fine. That would not make me happy. I am not "simpering" or helpless. Also not a slave.
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