What would you do?

I just broke up an argument between my 2 sons, ages 8 and almost 11.  What started out as name-calling between the 2, escalated into my 8-year-old pushing my 11-year-old hard enough to knock him into the wall and onto the floor.  My 8-year-old has a terrible temper.  Anytime he feels threatened or teased, he resorts to violence.  After breaking up this incident, I punished my 8-year-old by sitting him on the dining room chair.  I told him to sit there until his dad comes home, which is 4 hours.  I know that seems harsh, but this has been going on for some time now.

I've tried counseling for him, and that doesn't seem to work.  I've tried spankings but that hurts me more than him and I can't do it anymore.  I've tried taking things from him, but he says he doesn't care.  I've threatened to send him off to the Boys' Home, which is seriously looking like an option.  What else can I do? 

• What would you do? - at the end of my rope
  • military school? it worked for a guy i know. nm - MTMT38
  • Same situation - long message
    • Forgot to add... - sm
      • I guess he is being good now - anon
        • He is... - sm
      • Thank you -- it helps just knowing - at the end of my rope
        • can I share a situation with you I will never forget - mtmomof2
  • Nanny 911 would say he is angry about some injustice once - Yo
    • After 6 months of counseling, - at the end of my rope
  • Important - Tonya
    • The child psychologist didn't - at the end of my rope
      • there is a reason and why would you consider sending an 8-year-old to a home? - you need to counsel. no message
        • First off, I was very upset when I wrote - at the end of my rope
  • Make him repay every mean thing he does to his brother with 3 nice things sm - MeMT
    • Oh and DON'T back down. Make sure he follows through sm - MeMT
      • That's an interesting form of punishment - at the end of my rope
        • Why wait for dad? When you do that, you imply you are the weaker parent, for lack of - better term. Set boundaries and stick to them. sm
          • I know exactly what you mean - at the end of my rope
  • Tell 'em you're going to SELL them to the - highest bidder.
  • i know it is wearing on you but the recommend amount of timeout is 1 minute for each year of age. - that is all their little minds can handle or they
    • I know the timeout rules all too - at the end of my rope
  • You won't like my answer ... SM - Fire away, folks!
    • it will work at what cost? Your child learns to - associate love with hitting
    • I don't necessarily agree you should "wear them both out" SM - RockinMT
      • When I came out to the room they - at the end of my rope
        • Sounds like he got a LOT of attention - this afternoon. Maybe what he's looking for.
        • Proof positive that time-outs are nothing but - a WASTE of time. Give 'em a SWAT.
          • I thank you for your input, but I know - at the end of my rope
            • I can't say - spankedMT
          • Never have to spank mine and they listen very well nm - Disagree
    • What do you mean by "wear both - at the end of my rope
      • Spanking. - nm
        • That's what I thought you meant. - at the end of my rope
          • Haven't spanked hard enough. Believe me, I know. - Make it memorable and they'll quit.
            • believe it or not, some kids don't - at the end of my rope
              • temper, temper - truffle
                • Thank you -- my husband works - at the end of my rope
  • update - at the end of my rope
    • I think you found your own answer... - quote he pushes my buttons unquote -
      • I think you're right -- thanks n/m - at the end of my rope
  • temper - mom of boys
    • I agree - this sounds like our cousins son - kd

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