What's her reason for moving out of dad's house?

• Troubles with 17-year-old - Troubled Mom
  • Trouble with daughter - grandzila
  • What's her reason for moving out of dad's house? - sm
  • Personally, I would consider it lucky that - see message
    • Thank goodness some people still see it that way!! sm - me
      • You have to remember - sm
        • it's exactly what she meant, you know. - nm
          • Actually, no, I don't know that... - sm
            • almost 18 - anon
  • Why doesn't she get her own - apartment and find a roommate.
    • Why don't you be a mom and take care of your daughter until she is an adult? sm - Disagree
      • 18 IS legally considered an adult. - exasperated
        • Legally, yes, but how adult were you at 18? nm - yes but
          • at 18 - anon
            • Did your parents help? I lived on my own but (sm) - yes but
              • parents - anon
    • Ditto. - CG

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in fair condition about 10 years ago, got into some medical problems, and have just now paid off the mortgage.  Hubby and I agreed we would do nothing to the house for remodeling because we wanted to pay it off first, then the medical bills.  I need to know of some websites/magazines/books to start researching for how to go about this.  These will be major repairs - roof, septic, basement, windows, pretty much everything except wiring.  Where do we start?  Maybe hire a general contractor just to do an evaluation and give us recommendations?  Hubby is a handyman but cant seem to get a handle on where to begin.  We would like to do as much of the work ourselves as possible - labor of love and all that...   

Thanks for any and all kind suggestions!

I'm not a novice to moving.  Between 1996 and 2005, I moved 9 times, always with a U-Haul and hiring day workers to load and unload, except for the last move when I hired professional movers and it was smooth.  I will be using professional movers again this time.  Expensive but only 4 hours down time and in the MT business, time is money.

Here is my problem.  When I moved in here 2 years ago, it was with my now 25 yo son.  He has since moved out and now I am raising my 4 yo granddaughter.  I've never moved wtih a preschooler underfoot (I'm single).  I also thought I would be here a very, very long time, so I started making this a *home* again by buying nick nacks, restocking a respectable kitchen, hanging pictures, etc.  I've gained a lot of weight and only have a drawer full of clothes to pack, but the 4 yo, oy, she has clothes and stuff animals and little bitty tiny things that seem to move around the house while I'm sleeping at night.

I decided to finally get rid of things I've been hauling around since 1996 (french lead crystal, a really nice Mardi Gras collection of dolls, faces, beads), shoes, clothes I now realized I am NOT going to be getting back into within the next year.  Basically, I decided if I haven't touched it since I moved in here, I'm going to get rid of it.  It is all going to the thrift store or dumpster.  But, I'm finding that I am spending so much time organizing the getting rid of stuff or just throwing unusable stuff away, I'm not packing!  I don't feel organized at all and I'm the type that NEEDS to be organized.  And now I'm starting to feel panic that I won't be ready on the 28th when the truck pulls up.  Of course, every time I organize one area, the 4 yo comes along with her stuff and I can't walk across the room without stepping on her stuff, so that sets me back.  I've scheduled a service to come in 2 days after everything is moved out so I don't have to worry about cleaning, thank goodness.

What do I do?  Am I doing this backwards?  Should I go ahead and pack the stuff I want to take and THEN deal with the stuff I'm not going to take?  I am limited to 50 boxes.  I have so many collections of breakables now and the company won't let me pack them in the dresser drawers.  I can only put cloth items in my drawers.  It would be so much easier to pad the breakables in linens and clothing in the drawers, but I can't.

I wish I could just send the 4 yo to someone for the next 2 weeks, but that isn't going to happen.  On top of that, I scheduled myself for a really heavy work load these 2 weeks because I'll need extra money for rent on the 1st.  The new place is $300/month more than where I live now.  I'm moving because the school district rezoned the street where I live and it's not a good district and little one starts school in August.  I'm moving to a much better district.  The daycare across the street will be $200/month less than the one I use now, so that will help offset the cost of the new place, but I won't feel it in my pocket until the middle of next month.

Please give me some tips and maybe a Valium!

So I am from California, my little sister has been in North Carolina where her husband is stationed at the Marine Corps for two years.  They just had their first baby (the first extended family member) and I flew back there for the birth

08-18-08 8 pounds, 3 ounces 19 inches long

And now that I'm back home (only got to spend a week of her life with her) I am missing her tremendously!  The rest of my family is here on the west coast, but I'm feeling like I want to be closer to my niece.  My mom thinks it is because I am at the age of wanting babies, but I don't want my own yet!  Is this a crazy idea?  I mean, most people are not able to take their work where they go, and I don't want to pass the opportunity up.  I wouldn't live in Jacksonville, NC where they are, I was thinking more along the lines of Myrtle Beach SC... two hours away so they still have their privacy and I live somewhere where I think I would love (but have no idea really, I visited there one time)... I just don't know how you go about making plans to make such a huge move...

Any thoughts, suggestions, advice?

Obviously this is a quick assessment of my lifestyle, but I am willing to do it, but is it crazy to think i want to be around my niece enough that I would move 3,000 miles away from my home?

Thanks for the input

and i attached a pic cause i can't help showing her off! :)

This is Allyson Ayn!

but as far as when it will air, I really don't know as there have been some issues with the transfer between the producers and Bravo. There is an injunction against Lifetime from Bravo to where they cannot air the show until the legal mess gets sorted out, even though the season has been filmed, except for the finale.

I do like Top Chef on Bravo but it comes on the same time as Life on Mars, so I have to catch it on reruns.

Hi, I am looking for a little advice.  I am moving from my apartment after 3-1/2 years.  I am asthmatic and the lady under me is a very heavy smoker and the smoke infiltrates my apartment so badly that I have often thought of going to a hotel for the night. That is really not my issue. This lady has her rights and it is just time to move to a healthier apartment for me and my severe asthma.  Here is the big question:

My landlord has been asked on several occasions to try to find where the smoke is getting through to my place.  I have never made this a personal issue with the smoke, just a structural issue that might be resolved.  Everything they tried to do never really worked.  However, for the last 1-1/2 years, this landlord has been promising to put my DH and myself in another two bedroom apartment in the same complex. The time kept passing and it never happened.  Finally, I had enough and decided to ask to break my lease (with a doc's note).  The landlord THEN said to me "there will never be another 2 bedroom apartment because if another smoker moves under you, you will have the same situation."   Probably this is not the case, as the buildings are 40+ years old and the particular building I am in has "settled" leaving cracks in ceilings, etc.  Some of the other buildings do not have this problem.  SO, my question.... Keeping me signing a new lease in the hopes of getting a new apt and then telling me no, is that not DESCRIMINATION against my asthma?  I have been very patient and kind to everyone involved, and find that I am just getting kicked in the butt.  I know that smoking is a brittle issue with a lot of people, especially smokers who have been kicked out of just about everywhere and made to stand outside.  I understand that and I have not made this a "smoking war".  I have tried to find a structural way to solve it and if it cant be done, then I am just moving out . Easy as that.  Still, I can't help but feel bitter at the landlord who promised me another apartment and didn't deliver, saying I would have the same issues.  I have lived in apartments all my life and never had an issue like this, probably because this lady is an extremely heavy smoker (4 packs a day) and she does not open her windows.  The problem was inevitable. This is not a normal "smoker" issue.  Any comments on where I could stand legally would help. I know this is a "constructive eviction" which means the apt. was not habitable for me because of my asthma and I moved due to that.  any help is appreciated. tks in advance.  Sorry so long.

a townhouse.  No more upstairs/downstairs issues.  People along the sides, but pure wall with no obvious way for smoke.  This should be better.  I will have two floors and nobody under  I live in PA and there are no clauses in my lease for non-smoking so it is time to smell my own fresh air.  It's a shame the LL didn't afford me the same rights as the smoker.  Sure, my neighbor has the right to smoke in her own home, but I have the right also to not breathe her smoke in MY home.  I know in some cases this is called trespass, but I am just too tired to fight it anymore.  Next weekend I will be free free free!  Thanksagain for your comments.  I can always trust this site to give me a little support and lift my spirits. 

still praying for all those folks who got hit in the 40-mile range that this tornado went through......

Prayers will continue of course.  Thanks for keeping us updated, I was wondering. 

I think she didn't think AJ could ever be a Tony...provide for her in the way Carm is provided for...just a guess. Love that show, absolutely the best writing and acting bar none! When that goes, so does my HBO, but I do like Big Love too!