Very excellent post - see message
Posted By: me on 2009-05-22
In Reply to: see message-- - ks
Is there such a term as "very excellent" ? :-)
You are right on and I couldn't agree with you more.
The only problem is that the govt would never "regret" anything. If they get their way and force this child to take chemo and the child dies, their view point is "oh well, at least we got our money" I have found over time the govt does not really care about the people, as we can see what is happening in our govt today.
This should be a matter between the parents and child. Not the government.
I believe the mother should do everything she can to save her child, and if something happens to him at least she tried and she should have no regrets about that.
But yes, there is plenty of stuff in my life I regreted doing, but I have learned to live with my decisions. As you sais - it's our choices and this is how we grow and expand our minds.
I do hope she makes it to wherever she goes and he is able to get alternative treatment and everything works out for the best for them.
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Very excellent post - see message
Is there such a term as "very excellent" ? :-)
You are right on and I couldn't agree with you more.
The only problem is that the govt would never "regret" anything. If they get their way and force this child to take chemo and the child dies, their view point is "oh well, at least we got our money" I have found over time the govt does not really care about the people, as we can see what is happening in our govt today.
This should be a matter between the parents and child. Not the government.
I believe the mother should do everything she can to save her child, and if something happens to him at least she tried and she should have no regrets about that.
But yes, there is plenty of stuff in my life I regreted doing, but I have learned to live with my decisions. As you said - it's our choices and this is how we grow and expand our minds.
I do hope she makes it to wherever she goes and he is able to get alternative treatment and everything works out for the best for them.
This is an excellent post.
How awesome that you took so much time to reply to "exhausted" and yes, it's all very good advice. I've been there, done that also. I wish I had this board to come to years ago, but the advice here is right on the money.
Excellent post...
This is the same thing we have done with our 19YO...he's responsible, calls and checks in, and is home at a decent hour, so he does not have a curfew. Although, most of his free time is spent with our local Sheriff's deputies...he's yearing to be a deputy one day. Thank goodness he's not quite old enough yet though!
Excellent post!
xx
excellent post.
x
That is an excellent post from "Now". sm
Very practical and wise. There are those hidden resources out there that no one really looks into or knows about.
EXCELLENT POST! I'll be shopping right along with you. Thanks!
nm
excellent common sense post!
So true! Great post!
see message with above post, please.
nm
See who I picked in my message on first post.
xx
I agree with your post - see message
I have 3 jobs and keep putting my resume in for jobs doing whatever it takes to get hired on somewhere that will give me benefits.
You are so right that in our industry you can't depend on just one. I have seen companies fail and if you are dependent on one you are going to go down with them - and they never tell the employee ahead of time. Also with the economy the way it is there is just nothing that is guaranteed anymore.
I have a husband but he doesn't work (can't finding anything, and think he's going through a midlife crisis), so that leaves just me. I'm the one who has to do it all and I do and I don't complain about it. When he sees me typing all the time he says he feels bad, but I told him I do what I gotta do because we have bills to pay and need to eat and have a roof over our head. I was brought up to believe you do what you have to do and you don't complain about it. If you are unhappy then you change the situation. We all make the lives we live. For us this certainly is not the perfect situation but I'm doing my best to change and improve it.
I too am in my 50s and I've been taking home study courses (along with working 3 jobs), also to transition to something different. One never knows what path the MT will be. I hear more and more about jobs going overseas, or the current administration doing whatever they are going to do to health care and that could change a lot. I just think it is wise to have another skill.
To the OP - if you are reading this all I would suggest is that if you can't stay with relatives try looking for a studio or something very cheap. It may not be your ideal place, but do whatever you can to find yourself another job. Search, search, search the local newspapers, employment boards here, there's a ton of websites for jobs. If you have to work every day and more than one job do it. Take whatever you can get and then work on getting something better. I wish you all the luck.
forgot to put see message in my post. And it is only Monday. nm
nm
Before the post gets buried below regarding credit - very long message sm
I just wanted to share with the posters who were considering bankruptcy.
Unless you are on the verge of losing your home, I would strongly encourage you to consider another option. Bankruptcy does not just go away after a few years. It's there forever. Even if you rebuild your credit afterwards, it's still there - a haunting demon. A friend and my in-laws also filed bankruptcy in the past.
My in-laws filed over 20 years ago and have recovered financially but it's still there.
My husband is a credit card spender. I would only spend when I had the cash and did not depend on credit. It didn't matter though. Our spending habits combined nearly led to our financial demise a few years back too.
This is what I did and I hope you give it a try and it works for you too.
I started with a complete inventory of all of our bills, separating them into three categories.
Home (mortgage and utilities)
Credit cards - (lowest balance to highest balance regardless of the APR)
Miscellaneous bills (entertainment, clothing, food, gas, fast food, etc.)
Since the Home category is pretty consistent every month, I set up a budget for that first. I went back through our utility bill for the year prior and chose the highest month bill of the year and added that amount to our mortgage amount.
Next, I reviewed our telephone, internet, and television (satellite) bills. On average, I was paying about 230.00 per month for them all combined. Way too much in my opinion. I started shopping around and found a bundle package with Verizon. Now I pay 153.00 per month for unlimited long distance telephone, satellite TV, and DSL service. Saved $77.00 per month, just doing that.
Then I added this amount to the mortgage and utilities. This totalled amount is what I know I absolutely have to pay every month and I better make sure it's in the account.
Next, I did the Miscellaneous. I'm a paper keeper, meaning I keep EVERY receipt and then purge them about every 3-4 months. I started going over what was spent where and learned that we spent a lot more than we really needed to. I set up a weekly grocery budget and a fun budget. If there was anything extra at the end of the week, it was divided evenly between the two and added to the next week. I do this every week until the end of the month. If there is anything left over, that amount is divided in half again and half is divided again and added to the following week's budget (grocery and fun), the other half is locked away in the savings account.
The money for monthly gas was a little trickier when the gas prices skyrocketed. I first had a set limit for gas each week but did have to adjust that. I did manage to adjust it a little bit upwards and still be able to pay the cards down (see below.)
Also, every time I spend cash, no matter if the amount is $5.01 and all I need is a penny, I don't. Instead, I will give them $6.00 and get 0.99 change to put in my giant size espresso cup of change. When the cup gets full, the change is rolled and turned in to the bank as a deposit into the savings account. My cup last gave me $281.00 change to put in the savings account. That was in March. It's full again so will be adding at least that much to the savings account again very soon. Nobody touches the cup! They might lose a finger or even a hand!
That being said, and having two set amounts for each budget, I then subtracted that amount, plus the Household amount from our combined monthly income.
Lastly came the dreaded credit cards. To be honest, I was floored when I learned just how much credit card debt we had. My husband had wracked up over $40,000.00 in credit card debt alone. Since he paid his own credit card bills each month, I had no idea. Even worse than that, he is very inconsistent about paying his bills on time so he had late charges and the interest rates were way the heck up there. It was terrible.
I took each of his cards most current statements and started from the lowest to highest balance. The lowest one was about 1200.00 but the interest rate on it by that time was 22%. This is where I started.
I had him call the company and basically gave him a script to go by (my name wasn't on the cards or I would have done it myself). He requested a decrease in his APR on each and every card. Two of the five card companies agreed on the first call. The 22% card was reduced to 11% so they cut it in half. Not as low as I would like but it was a start. Another card was up to 31% and they reduced that to 20%. The other three didn't budge the first time.
This is where I made two 'necessary' purchases. The first one was MS Money software. I highly recommend it. You can set up your checking, savings accounts, print your checks, balance your checkbook in about 5 minutes, pretty much a no brainer software that really keeps you in line with your bills and spending as long as you remember to faithfully enter any debit card purchase in your check register provided with the software. It will also link to many banks to update your balances online. You can also set it up to remind you for upcoming bills. (Maybe if the husband had used this earlier, we would not have been in this situation?)
The second purchase was about $8.00. An accordion file folder for the monthly statements. Husband always threw his away and I can't even begin to tell you what a dumb idea that is. KEEP them. Organize the tabs for each bill and put your statement in when you pay each bill. I also write the date and the amount when I make a payment somewhere on the statement, then keep them in chronological order.
The actual payments came next. The smallest balance card was paid off first. All of other cards only got the minimum payment PLUS $1 more. I started doing this just for my own peace of mind I guess but I learned later that this actually helped us a bit when negotiating the lower APRs on the three more stubborn cards. It may have only been $1 extra but it was EXTRA payment and, believe it or not, they do look at that.
Excluding the card to be paid off first, I added up the minimum payments of the remaining four cards (plus the extra dollar to each of those) and decided on an amount to pay the lowest balance card to get that balance moving toward 0 as fast as I could.
In this case, I decided on 200.00. This left me with a little over 200.00 extra (I call it mad money but it really goes into savings anyway -planning ahead for birthdays, auto insurance, Christmas, and emergencies.)
I had that card paid off relatively quickly in a few months. When it was paid off, the card was cancelled and that 200.00 was added to the minimum payment (plus $1) on the next lowest balance card. After the first month of this, once again, had the husband call his credit card company and ask for a reduction in his APR. This time it was granted. Should also mention that this card was one of the three that refused the request the first time.
The first six months or so of this was a mildly painful transition. He was used to whipping out a credit card, I was used to having cash on hand for whatever I wanted. It wasn't going to happen anymore.
Finally, I was down to the last remaining card (754.00 per month payment by this time, having applied the payments for each card to the next as they were paid off.)
When I got to this point, I started shopping around for cards with rewards programs and started comparing those cards. The last card I was paying on also had a rewards program but not quite what I wanted. I wanted to know if the terms were negotiable. It was! How about that!
So, instead of losing a valuable customer the card company decided to keep me.
Now I get 3% back on purchases of most things as long as I pay the balance in full every month (which I do). Any kind of air or rail travel purchased with the card is a 6% reward.
I no longer use a debit card. The husband is not allowed to get a credit card again but instead, takes a certain amount of cash every week. Say what you want but he got us into this mess pretty much so he has to live with it now.
It's been a few years now working with this system but it has been very good for us. I find that I average about 400.00 per month AFTER the rewards bonuses kick in so essentially I am able to bank another $354.00 per month in savings. It adds up quicker than you might think.
Should also mention that we have two teens still at home and they can really be expensive. They were made a part of the plan and do their part to help out too. Their contribution is mostly the avoidance of fast food all the time. They can come home and have a meal or eat before they leave. Things like that.
Sorry for the lengthy post but hopefully I can help anyone else get out of a potentially bad financial situation like we faced.
the underlying read-between-the-lines message of the insurance lobbyist's message was (sm)
to, yes, appeal the denied claim. However, she lobbies for the insurance companies. She comes across sounding like she's on the patient's side but in reality she is on the side of the insurance company. The insurance company gets to deny whatever claims they want right off the bat. That leaves the SICK patient (who needs the coverage NOW when they are sick) to have to go through the appeals process. That could take quite a while. Imagine a cancer patient being denied some form of treatment that is going to help them. They now have to go through the appeals process (or pay out of pocket) in order for that treatment to be covered. In the MEANTIME their cancer is progressing. From the point of view of the insurance company, if they drag it out long enough they don't have to pay for it at all. That same insurance lobbyist was on 20/20 a little while back and basically came right out and said that the insurance companies COULDN'T AFFORD to pay for coverage for sick people. She's not on the patient's side.
EXCELLENT! Whatever you do, please
dont mutilate their claws! I have adopted two lovely males who were butchered in this way and they are OVER-aggressive to compensate for their lack of natural defense.
And this solution really does work. If you say HEY loudly while you spritz them eventually just the HEY will work... they are trainable to a degree.
If you can't get a scratcher box, even a sheet of cardboard will do - good luck!
There is an excellent one, but I don't think
xx
Wow - those are excellent
If I was really into music and guitars or knew anyone really into guitars I'd definitely buy one. The quality of your craftsmanship is excellent!
Hope you do really well with them.
Excellent - way to go for your mom
x
Excellent tip - thank you so much
I always get those two mixed up and have to stop and think about it. Thanks for the tip.
Looks excellent, bet its even better with
x
EXCELLENT joke! *LOL*.........
Excellent reply!
Happy Hanukkah by the way!
Does it start today or tomorrow? I have two calendars that conflict each other.
Excellent!!! More women should do this....
I have an excellent recipe if you want it. sm
just make a note under this message, I'll check later and type it in.
that is excellent advice. sm
i guess my will power just isn't very good right now. we have five acres and i try to get out every day and walk our fenced area, which about five or six times around is a mile. i guess i should put up a picture of myself when i was thinner and have that be a motivation
Excellent suggestion
x
Thank you all SO MUCH for your excellent info!!! sm
I knew I was doing the right thing to ask you gals. After telling my hubby everything you all said and researching online a bit, he and I agree that - although we THOUGHT we were going to DISNEY WORLD, our kids would actually probably like Universal and Sea World. (And my youngest is 48 inches and rides every roller coaster Six Flags will let him on). Looking at the TV/Movie themes between Disney and Universal, I hate to admit it but they all seem to have outgrown Disney a bit. Is there any sense in staying in the Disney resorts for the specials/perks but mostly going (DRIVING) to other parks? Or if just staying off would be better? I just want to spend the money wisely.
The book was excellent!...sm
I read that when I was around 16 and couldn't put it down. Check it out!
That is an excellent point! - nm
x
i think that's an excellent idea. Nobody should pay for your
x
Quite the contrary, it's an excellent and (sm)
proven way to reduce weight and improve your health. There are different phases to low carb. Not all do it for the weight loss, in fact, but the energy and good overall feeling that comes with eliminating processed carbs. If you've never tried it, don't knock it. Once one has achieved their desired weight loss with low carb, they can still maintain a low carb lifestyle without further weight loss. It works and it's proven. The energy that you get back is the biggest plus to this LIFESTYLE - yes, it's a lifestyle, not a "diet."
Wow -these are excellent suggestions
Thank you, thank you, thank you. I am 49 years old (feel 69 right now). I'm 189 pounds and lead very very sedentery life. No kids, no activity. I know I need to do some activity but I just can't get motivated. However, I do have an exercise video called Callanetics...very low impact aerobics (slow movements with very relaxing music), so tonight I pulled it out and starting tomorrow going to do that at the end of the work day.
I too have to have my caffeine and one day without it I sure can tell. I'm what you would call "semi-organic" (at least that's what I call it). I refuse to take any medication (not even aspirin when I have a headache). I'm trying to go vegetarian (or more vegetarin) but I do like meat. Just got to lose weight and a bit more exercise.
I'm also ticked as I'm 48 and haven't hit menopause. Bummer big time for me. Just ended my weeklong visit with "my friend" and I can't tell you how much I hate it. I have no kids and don't want any kids ever. Had ectopic pregnancy years ago so only have one ovary and tube and I'm thinking...I'm not a "baby producing machine", yet I'm cursed with these blasted periods. Okay - sorry, that's more of my own emotional problem I have to deal with. I just want the periods to end. Your suggestions of herbal supplements are most interesting and I will be looking into them. Thank you again for your post.
yup it is excellent and dependable
Never had a problem with it in the three years I've been using it.
Oh you wouldn't believe all the free stuff that is available. Whenever I'm looking for something there seems to always be something you can get for free that is equal in comparison (well except a foot pedal and head phones that is. HA HA)
Here's another funny fact - has nothing to do with MT, but DH just found a website and you know all these courses they teach at the big wig universities - you can watch the classes online for free. These are courses from MIT and really expensive universities. So if you were interested in getting your degree completed you could watch the courses, take a test and get your degree for a tenth of what it would cost you to sit in the same lecture class at a fancy university.
That is one thing I love about the internet. There is a wealth of information and knowledge all for free. Talk about living in a great country!
Excellent point!
Excellent response!
Short on time and brain is toast but hey, want to know, keep me in mind and I'll answer too tomorrow probably. I enjoy conversation, even at odds with someone, that is not like what I see up a little further on this page. Thanks.
But, she and her ex are on excellent terms
They see and talk with each other every week, no animosity there so that is not a problem. If fact when she was here Thanksgiving she had invited him if he were going to be in town.
Thanks everyone - every one of these ideas are excellent
I'm printing them all out and anything that maybe added later.
I'm so used to just going to the grocery store and buying what I need/want. Gone are those days after going to the tax man. My taxes doubled this year and also I'm now stuck with a tax bill for last year, so have got to keep food to 100/week cos that's all that's left. With all these suggestions I know I won't have a problem.
I love the idea of making my own bread. Used to do that as a kid with my mom and also my own pizza dough. Looks like all these suggestions will make meal times fun too.
These are excellent suggestions!
Good suggestions for others who may be facing the same situation down the road.
This one I found sounds excellent! May try it myself.
INGREDIENTS
1 (8 ounce) package elbow macaroni
5 tablespoons butter
5 tablespoons all-purpose flour
1 quart warm milk (110 degrees F/45 degrees C)
salt and pepper to taste
1 pinch cayenne pepper
1/4 pound cubed ham
5 ounces cubed Cheddar cheese
5 ounces mozzarella cheese, cubed
5 ounces Monterey Jack cheese, cubed
paprika to taste
DIRECTIONS
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Grease a 9 x 13 baking dish. Bring a large pot of lightly salted water to a boil. Add pasta and cook for 8 to 10 minutes or until AL dente; drain.
In medium saucepan, melt butter and stir in flour to make a roux. Cook 1 to 2 minutes, stirring constantly, then whisk in warm milk a little at a time to make a white sauce. Bring to a boil, then reduce heat and simmer. Mix in salt, pepper, and cayenne, and stir frequently until sauce thickens.
Remove pan from heat and stir in cheddar, mozzarella, jack and ham. Combine pasta with sauce and stir well. Pour into baking dish. Use paprika to make a decorative pattern on top. Bake 45 to 60 minutes, or until top is the desired crispiness. Let rest 20 minutes before serving.
Excellent News! Thanks! Now I can watch it again!!!
I am sure Elizabeth and Joy are thrilled to pieces!!!! LOL
I read it is an excellent test, but
I also heard it really smarts.
SAW HAIRSPRAY LAST NIGHT EXCELLENT GO SEE IT NM
NM
The new digital ones give excellent
pictures and you probably won't have to get any of those extra pictures they used to have to do a lot. They can see better all the way out to the skin, so if you have a mole or something it won't cause confusion; they can see exactly what's going on. Therefore it's worth calling around and seeing if digital mammography is available at any centers in your area.
I believe it is going to end the cycle of mammo/US/bx my mom has had to go thru in the past that always turned out to be just scar tissue (after the first benign bx).
Excellent advice. One more thing...
I use doormat for scratching "post". It is one of those thick choir mats. My cats love to dig their claws in it. It is important for cats to "claw" something, but NOT furniture, although I have a wicker chair which has also seen better days. As stated, they love to dig their claws in stuff and will USUALLY stay away from most furniture.
Excellent Work Chair
http://ellen.warnerbros.com/2008/01/hawaii_chair.php
Excellent suggestion on the dentist
He has a cleaning scheduled in June (the soonest we could get him in without missing school) and at 17 he has never had a cavity. Well, the last time he was there was about 8 months ago so he was 16 then if we want to get technical. LOL! Whew, I finally slept last night. Definitely starting to feel a bit better, but I did make his fav. dinner last night, lasagna, and while he ate just fine, normally there are very few leftovers and not even half was eaten. DD suddenly decided yesterday she no longer likes lasagna so all she ate was salad and bread. I know my radar is up now and I will be picking everything apart. Watching what he eats, if he goes to the bathroom shortly after eating, etc. Even though this has been tough, I put my parents through so much more. I really owe them an apology.
You sound like an excellent parent
I do not have any children, but having grown up with parents who sound just like you I am grateful for what they did for me. I didn't have what every other kid had and I had to earn what I did get. We were involved in girl scouts and my mom was the leader of our troop. She was involved in everything we did and she did not believe in using activities as a babysitter. For babysitting she hired a girl down the road. So I am grateful to have the parents I had (mom's gone but dad is still alive). They instilled values in me and if I ever had kids I would raise them the same exact way my parents raised me. So good for you and I know when your kids are grown with kids of their own they'll remember what you did for them and will be thankful to you. I wish more parents were like you (my sister could take some lessons for sure - but that's a whole nother post).
Thanks! Excellent website! Unfortunately, I've
plastic sheet (my cat PREFERS plastic, so it attracts her), and the hamster bedding. Considering the amount of litter I go through in a week, the hamster bedding may be a bit pricey, but at this point anything is worth a try.
One thing I should point out is that she used to poo in the box, and pee on the floor. Recently she's begun to do the opposite.
Things I've done include:
- Vet: Blood & urine done, no evidence of infection or kidney problems.
- Crate training. (Effective for a while, but not forever. She's on her 4th crating session right now.)
- I'm anal about the litter boxes - scoop them out (I have FOUR!) every time I walk past & see something in them.
- Currently using Feliway Comfort Zone, don't see any improvement.
- If I stand there and watch her, I can say "in your box", and she'll use it. The minute I leave the room, though, or in the middle of the night, then she's back to messing on the floor at night. She is currently being crated all night so that I don't have to spend the first hour of every morning cleanin up after her.
- Re: Stress, it's probably a factor. She's a naturally tense & wary cat. (Adopted from a rescue, which she ended up in because of her litter problem. Original owner was going to euthanize her at the age of 1 year, & vet called rescue.)
- I don't use ammonia-containing cleansers on the floor (ammonia encourages repeat offenses), but do use vinegar alternating with Nature's Miracle For Cats.
- Have tried tossing out older cat boxes and replacing with brand-new ones. Have also tried using a VERY big box for more "elbow room", but she liked that the least.
- Have been using rewards when I see her even set foot in the box. It works, but only when I'm there watching. She's a wiley little devil.
Another thing I haven't tried yet (because of the expense, and also because the Feliway has proven to be a bust) is something like Prozac. Has anyone out there tried an SSRI for their floor-peeing cat? Did you find it effective?
You all sound like excellent parents
I don't have any kids myself and I was reading all your posts and you all sound like very good parents (the kind I would want to have if I was growing up). Sounds like times have changed since I was a teenager (lets see....over 30 years ago - ugh!!!!), but I do agree that parents have to know what's going on in their kids lives. I see a lot of horrible things in the news of troubled kids (school shootings, bullies and stuff, kids into drugs, or kids being mean and all the other stuff that goes on) and always wonder if their parents knew what they were up too.
Excellent point - love that !! nm
x
excellent advice, I'm going through a divorce sm
and we have a signed, notarized separation agreement since the State of Florida doesn't recognize legal separation. I traded half of his 401K for health/dental and vision insurance for the next year (since my employer doesn't have good coverage) plus $1K a month for the next year. Hopefully in a year I can find another job that will have health insurance.
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