Update on son graduation/nephew wedding
Posted By: Silly Girl on 2008-12-24
In Reply to:
For those of you who may remember - my son is graduating high school this year and my nephew decided to get married in the same month. I had received an email from my SIL stating that my son's graduation best not interfere with her son's wedding. (longer story - that's the condensed version).
Anyways, my son's graduation is May 15. While at my SIL's today, they announced the wedding is May 11. SO, definitely no conflict (whew) but after a few minutes I realized that the 11th is on a Monday (apparently it's cheaper to get married during the week). And the wedding is in another town which means trying to get off work, get changed, gather all the kids, travel out of town (hour and a half away) and then get back home since the kids have school the next day and the adults all have to work the next day. (definitely not going to stress about it though and will be planning my son's graduation party for the following weekend )
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Looking for graduation party ideas for son's graduation. I have a few friends helping me sm
but any new ideas would be great too. This is my first born graduating so I'm kind of clueless what I'm doing. One friend suggested a poster board with lots of his pictures. My sister suggested putting his trophies, awards, acceptance letter from his college, etc. on a table. As far as food, we are having sloppy joes, meatballs, pulled pork sandwiches, possibly some sausage sandwiches, fried chicken, pasta salad, macaroni salad, german potato salad, olives, pickles, nuts, cookies, chips/pretzels, dip, cookies, cake, etc. Any more ideas?? I'll be doing this three more times (oldest son is 18, youngest son is 3 so I have a while in between - hopefully I'll be a "pro" by the time the youngest graduates!! XXXXX)
You need to send a wedding gift if you attend the wedding - sm
If possible you should drop it by the brides or grooms house, etc. so you don't have to take it to the wedding, and so they don't have to worry about transporting the gifts from the church or the reception. You should always send a wedding gift if you attend the wedding though.
This wedding, the wedding party will be releasing butterflies!
Apparently, you can buy live butterflies, individually packaged, that can be released after the ceremony. The bride and groom are 65 and 68 years old, for crying out loud and this is their second marriage. This wedding is the craziest thing I've ever seen!
graduation
A few years ago, we had 5 in our family that were graduating, 3 from jr. high & 2 from high school... then again 3 from high school so we all ended up giving them $40 each.. I think it depends on what you think is affordable.. the gas card sounds great... I will have one this year graduating, a nephew, then one nephew next year & then my last child in school in 5 more years.. I'm gettin old.. lol
The school should know when graduation is - sm
contact them and inform the nephew of the date and the aunt.....and hope the graduation will be after the wedding or they may have a zillion excuses not to come as too busy with wedding stuff. Or ask the nephew just to have his wedding in June, or April. Good luck.
housewarming vs. graduation gift
My grandma got me luggage and my mom got me a pots and pans set.
graduation gift for high school sm
I know this subject was brought up before and some said up to a thousand dollars for high school (grandparent). I cannot afford this and it is almost being hinted that the kid needs money although already has a brand new car, is working and is going to a local community college to save money. The kid literally has everything, nice home, clothes, etc. We have worked our fingers to the bone literally and can't just "hand over" part of our retirement savings. If we give anything from a store it is always taken back for the money as it is never "good enough" and with the parents' approval. I almost want to get something nice engraved so it can't be returned.(Luggage is out.) How much would you take out of your savings, I don't know what to do. What would your limit be for a gift to an 18-year-old? The kid is a good kid and not the kid's fault, kind of a "tradition" to expect "cash" as a gift.
We had my son's graduation party this past weekend which turned out great! please sm
Now I'm just wondering if I should do anything for the family/friends that helped with making some of the food, setting up, etc. Looking for advice from people that have been through this. Thanks
I used to pay my nephew to ..sm
Take care of my sheltie for part of our vacation because my DH would come along to the beach for a few days and then he'd be home the rest of the week we were gone. I'm glad DH didn't go last year because my dog died while I was gone. I don't know what my nephew would've done.
My nephew is so cute :-)
He's about 6 month old now. I put him down for a nap and he refused to put his legs flat so I could cover him, so I put the blanket over his legs the way he was. He proceeds to put a foot on each cheek, reaches between his legs and pulls the blanket up to his chin. He looked some someone with fake legs with his feet like that. I was tearing up laughing. Such a cutie pie. lol
My nephew did the same thing
but he came around eventually. Have you tried any of the books for kids like "Everybody Poops"?
Nephew and car -- sorry it is long
My nephew is a Police Captain and this is what he has done with his boys. Oregon also has a law stating that for the first six months of having your license you can only drive with family members in the car, which they did. They had an older car that needed some fixing up and so and my great nephew (his oldest son and I) I went to junk yards, got the pieces that were needed, and then he and his step grandfather put it together and made sure it was mechanically safe and that was his car. Because he was in the Honor Society, he got a cut in his insurance but if he ever dropped his grades he would have to pay the difference. He had a part-time job while playing baseball and making All Stars and got a college scholarship for baseball and paid for his gas and running around. Then when he graduate and started college he got his own car and could not believe it but this kid does not care about fads or whatever and got a Ford Taurus because it was in good shape, could haul his baseball equipment and had air condiitoning. He paid for it himself with graduation money, jobs, etc. He is still doing well. The second one was basically the same. He drove the older car that we fixed up when David got his new car. Again they were not embarassed or anything. They just wanted transportation. He then got a part-time job, he was not in sports so could work more, saved up money and bought an older Blazer because he is fisherman and wanted the 4-wheel drive. But he again has good grades, and stays out of trouble. But they are responsible for the up keep on their cars, etc. I think it all depends on the kid and what they are involved in and so on. They appreciated everything that we all did to help them, they take care of their vehicles and are proud of what they have done. But I think that by running errands and doing things for you she is paying for the car and upkeep. If she is busy and has good grades and stay out of trouble, help her all you can. If her attitude is great, again help her. Just as long she doesn't expect it and appreciates what you have done. And not one of them have gotten a ticket or been in an accident and are 18 and 20 now.
Have guy cousins in early 20s and my nephew
is 17. They shop a lot at Macy's. We're in the NY area. Apparently certain brand names are "in" like Ecko, Sean John, Polo, etc. but can be very expensive. As far as hairstyles, maybe check out the hairdos on some of the clothing/store websites. Here's one from Macy's. If I lived near you; I'd help with the makeover :) Sounds like fun. lol
http://www1.macys.com/catalog/index.ognc?CategoryID=11345&PageID=11345*1*24*-1*-1&kw=Sean%20John&LinkType=EverGreen
Heard from my nephew in Iraq!
I have written briefly about my 19-year-old nephew who is involved in this latest operation in Baghdad to route Al-Qaeda insurgents. Since it had been announced that his Division/Brigade was one of the primary groups in this action, we've all been just sick with worry. I just wanted to let you guys know that I had a very brief "I'm ok" email from him last night. He can't really say what he's doing or anything (naturally) but we're just sop happy to hear that he's okay. I can't think when I've been happier to open an email in my life! So I just wanted to share that happy news and to thank those of you who are praying/sending good thoughts/etc. for all of our troops. It means more than you can possibly realize.
On behalf of my nephew and other GIs overseas, THANK YOU
My nephew reports to me that the anonymous gifts to guys in his unit have been pouring in, lifting their spirits and reminding them of why they are so far from home at this Christmas season. Obviously, I don't know who all of the packages are from but to any of you who have remembered any of our servicemen and women overseas, thank you from the bottom of my heart. These kids (and they are mostly kids 18-25, in my nephew's unit at least) have seen awful things and mostly have to always be on the alert - how BEAUTIFUL that they have been remembered.
My SIL changed a couple weeks before she had my nephew.
She had to work it out with her insurance who would be paid what but if you aren't comfortable, don't go back. I'd complain to the hospital about the nurse too.
Clueless too and that's what I need to know! I snooped on my nephew's my space...uh-oh
I didn't sign up or anything - I just did a Google of his name with my-space and found it that way...he's not private. He's 18. So how would it/he know who I am? Anyone?
And the best is when I told my sis (his mom) and she said YOU DID?!?!?!?!?!??
I said, didn't you?
She said yeah.
LOL!
Just took my 10 y/o nephew to see The Last Mimzy. What a great movie
t
That's for sure, but my nephew's wife is a school teacher and
actually lost a job some years back because she took a child by the shoulder to calm him down after disrupting the class. They are not permitted to do anything, and God knows so many of the homes these kids come from don't offer any kind of structure or discipline. It is a shame, but we are just letting the morals and beliefs we once stood for be taken over by thugs. The neighborhood I grew up in as a child was once a very nice neighborhood. No one dares go there now. It is in bad shape and filled with drugs and violence. It breaks my heart.
Holiday gift for nephew in Iraq
I'd like to send a gift/gifts to my nephew in Iraq. This is his first Christmas away so I know it will be hard for him. If possible, I'd like to include something personal just for him and maybe some stuff for his buddies to share. I asked him point-blank what he'd like and, typical guy, he says "anything" which is of NO HELP at all. I have no clue what they're allowed to have or not have.
You guys have any ideas? Thanks!
Warren Jeffs' nephew speaking out - see yahoonews
Apparently the boys, including himself and his brothers, are also molested by this monster. So he is just a horrible child molester who has brainwashed women into giving birth to new victims for him!!!!!
What would you all do? My SIL is making my DH attend my nephew's HS grad in Texas this June...sm
We live in Illinois.
He would be taking my youngest son with him also. The total cost of the trip for the two of them would easily be $2000 since my DH does not get paid for taking time off work. If he takes this trip that would mean no vacation for me or my other two kids next year since that's pretty much all we can afford is one vacation a year. She is insisting her only brother (DH) be there at the actual ceremony which is on a Tuesday evening. Then afterwards they plan on going out to dinner to celebrate - no party that would be it.
I would rather we go the following week, drive the entire family and stay the week and celebrate the whole week with them. My son graduates high school in two years and I don't expect her to be at the ceremony for that. We probably wouldn't have enough tickets for her anyway.
DH doesn't have the guts to tell her "No" since she's laying the guilt trip pretty thick.
Do you think we are obligated to go to the ceremony? She has more than enough family members that live over there that could attend (grandparents, aunts, uncles, her other children).
Thanks for any input.
Admit it that YOU put yuor nephew's and your SIL's inheritance share into your POCKET.
It is me who 'got it' very clearly.
I wish we could all go the week of the graduation but their graduations are always a week earlier th
ours. So actually all three of my kids are still in school this week while all of hers will already be out. My youngest is actually missing school to go but my two older kids have finals so they can't go at all that week.
Thank you. I guess I'm just trying to find a nice way to say it without causing friction and keeping the peace.
My DH is your typical male, just deal with it when the time comes whereas I want to take care of things right away without hurting anyone's feelings.
LOL; were you at *my* wedding?
I think it took me almost a year to get them all out - but 100+ is a lot of handwritten thank yous! I know, no excuse ; )
The Wedding
Yes, you are just being petty. Obviously, you love your dad, but really ... What difference does it really make to YOUR life how much he paid for the ring, how much they spend on the wedding, etc.? Rejoice in your dad's happiness and grow up. You only go around once in this life. Let your dad enjoy his golden years. I say, "Good for him - go Daddy!"
Lilly
When is the wedding and where are
you staying?
wedding
Wedding is 05/17 at Mandalay Bay but we are staying at New York, New York - this is my first trip to Vegas and I'm pretty excited. . We are staying 3 nights.
Would you go to a wedding of
a step neice that you have not heard from for over 20 years? I am so against this, plus I have not talked to her mother or aunts for the same amount of time. I cannot afford to get something to wear with the paychecks I have been getting, giving a gift, etc. I think the only reason I was invited was for the gift. I am trying to get out of it but it is my stepfather's granddaughter and he has been very good to me so I would be doing it for him only. How could I get out of this without hurting my dad? It is this Friday and I have done absolutely nothing to get ready for it. Unfortunately, I already sent in the RSVP card for dinner.
Wedding
If it were me, I would just send a card with a small gift in it. This way you won't have to spend any money buying something to wear. You are probabably right about just wanting the gift.
Yes - the wedding was on TV, he married
he did marry the air-head, he called her princess.
Wedding Ring ?
Do you have more than one? I have a wedding and engagment ring that DH gave me that I used to wear all the time, along with a diamond band my mom gave me years ago. Last summer my mom gave me her engagment ring that she really never wears anymore. Since then, I haven't been wearing the engagment ring DH gave me, I wear the plain gold band I got married in, along with my mom's two rings that she gave me.
DH says he doesn't mind as long as I wear the wedding band that we got married in. I guess it's a superstition thing with him. He understands that I miss my parents (especially my mom), since they live in Florida and we are in New York.
How do your SO's feel about stuff like this? Do they even have an opinion about what rings you wear or don't wear?
She was a wedding present
From my husband to me. When we brought her home she weighed just 1.5 pounds. She was so scrawny. We almost lost her twice and boy did she cost us a fortune, but it was well worth it. We found out she had asthma when she was about two and when I found her she was turning blue. She was on steroids for a long time. She weighed 20 pounds, quite a change from when we first got her. Then she ate fake pine needles from our Christmas tree one year and had to have emergency surgery to get this huge wad of needles out of her intestine. She was the sweetest cat and wouldn't hurt anything or anyone. She used to sleep on my head (on my pilow) which drove my husband nuts. LOL. She purred like a race car. I'll miss that definitely. I still have a, what I call, a wacky 10 year old black cat at home. I think he knows she's gone. Thank you so much.
I had a no child wedding except for immediate - sm
family; so to hopefully appease the very few that could not bring their kids (3 couples) I just had my 2 nephews carry my dress train. We had a swim party reception and I did not want to have to worry about parents getting drunk or inattentive and having a child drown. I knew my SILs would watch their kids as they are both somewhat overprotective, plus they were used to doing this when all the family was over anyways. But the post below is good about the gifts, or maybe directing people to the guest registry; handing out the "favors" or whatever you may have there for the guests.
Wedding shower...
My niece is getting married in August and is having a shower in July. Long story short, they live together, have been for a looonnnggg time now. On the invite, it says "Money preferred" with a bunch of $$$ around it. They're calling it a "greenback shower"...Is it just me, or is this totally disgusting and greedy? Makes me not wanna go. Also, I am not even sure how much to give. We never see them, only at family functions (DH's family.....)...anyway, is it just me that feels this way?
wedding shower
I agree. I think they have a lot of nerve expecting guests to "finance" their life together. Are they getting married after so long just to make some bucks? Or are you supposed to help offset the cost of this wedding? Are they registered? I'd give her a gift (if that's what you'd prefer). If you feel you have to give money, I'd probably stay in the $25.00 range or whatever you feel comfortable giving. Of course, you could always make an excuse and not go. After all, they'll probably want money as a wedding gift also!
Wedding question. SM
Okay, I'm confused as far as the gift process. I am invited to the bridal shower and the wedding and reception. My question is this, do I get two separate gifts - one for the bride for the bridal shower and one for the happy couple for the wedding? This is an older couple (in their 50s) and this is the second marriage for both.
If so, I need some nifty ideas for a bridal shower gift. Nothing naughty like lingerie or sex toys (which would be hilarious) because the bride is very, VERY refined and would not find any kind of humor in it at all. Plus the bridal shower will probably be elegant and tasteful and will make Emily Post proud. So I guess I should wear a bra and show up with a tasteful gift.
Thanks!
Another wedding question... SM
I posted a question a few weeks back about a wedding I'm about to attend and whether I needed to give a gift at the bridal shower and the wedding...
Anyway, the wedding is this Saturday. I've been asked to be in charge of the guest book, whatever that means. The dress I bought for the wedding is red. Yesterday, I'm told that the bride isn't happy with that and that her wedding colors are periwinkle and some sort of pastel green.
Now, I'm very irritated. I'm told that I'm not part of the wedding party, but they just want me to make sure everyone signs the book. No one told me that I need to try and match the wedding colors and now five days before the wedding, I'm told the bride doesn't like that I have a red dress!!??
I came from out of town for this thing so this dress is the only dress I brought with me! I'm working from my hotel room so we could be here this whole week because my daughter is the flower girl and they needed to do a fitting for her and she had to be here for the rehearsal. Now they are suggesting I buy a new dress?
My response to the bride was if she doesn't like my dress, she can buy me a new one. Now her daughters are telling me I'm being difficult and ruining their mothers special moment. The groom does everything the bride tells him too, so he's not on my side even though he's my family. I have half a mind to get in my car and drive back to Missouri with my daughter and tell them all to take a flying leap!
Am I being unreasonable here?
WOW. Yes what a crazy wedding
Glad you have been demoted to program passer outer. LOL. Butterflies and 65 and 68 years old. CRAZY. Keep us posted about he reception. I am sure that should be a hoot too.
Enjoy yourself. It is almost over. LOL.
BTW - I am going to a wedding Sept 1st. They are going to have a pig roast. How about that?? I am from NJ and never been to a wedding like that before. Should be very exciting. Can't wait.
Going to an outdoor wedding on Sat.
where they are having a pig roast. Never heard of such a thing at a wedding, so should be interesting. Sunday going to my sister-in-law's summer home, as she calls it, (her trailer at a campsite). She loves it there and then laboring on Labor Day. Have to work. Enjoy the unofficial end of Summer.
Wedding poem? sm
DH and I are renewing our vows for our 20th anniversary. At first we didn't think this was going to happen but just found out it is a go and it is happening Wednesday. Would like for our daughter to read a poem. It will just be DH, DS, DD, myself, the preacher, and the Lord. Any suggestions. Am also posting on Christianity board for additional suggestions for DS. Thanks for any help!
What about Betsy's Wedding???
It is kind of an older movie with Molly Ringwold when she was very young and Alan Alda. This has got to be about the funniest movie I have seen. Also get Big Trouble with Peter Falk and Beverly De'Angelo, Robert Stack and others. This and In-Laws are about the funniest movies I have ever seen. Anyway we all get down in the dumps at times. I kind of dread the holidays sometimes because my sister's husband is so very rude and they are all very materialistic -- all they care about is money -- it is kind of hard to be around people like that. His mother just recently died and I don't think he shed one tear or even cared. It was just business as usual. Kind of shallow person. Oh well. Takes all kinds to make the world they say. So you just cheer up girl. Hope you feel better really soon.
Suzanne
destination wedding
I've thought about this - with just a few friends/family. . maybe a cruise or somewhere you could spend honeymoon?
This is just a simple wedding. Nothing more,
X
Met at my brother's wedding.
My Big Fat Greek Wedding.
xx
I have my wedding/engagement rings and now - sm
my mom's. My dad gave them to me after my mom died. However I cannot wear any of them since I have gained 70 pounds since I first married. My rings still fit after 30 pounds but now I just cannot do it. I bought 2 fake bands in larger sizes, but they are too tight now too. I am working now though to lose the weight and with any luck wear my rings again in about 5 months. As far as I know it does not bother him that I do not wear my rings, though once I get thin again we will see if that attitude changes, I have a feeling it may. As for my DH, he has worn his ring about 3 times, a waste of $750 (luckily that was a wholesale price and not retail--I have connections). He works with electron microscopes though, and it is dangerous for him to wear his ring, though he could if he really wanted to and was careful, but then he'd probably end up losing it. A co-worker had his on and an electron beam arched and literally welded his ring and finger to the gun in the microscope. Poor guy had quite a burn on his finger and quit wearing his ring after that. So most of the engineers there do not wear their rings. I do not have a problem with it though. He tells people he is married with kids if the subject ever comes up.
Son's wedding - Grandma is insisting
does not want at THEIR wedding. How do I, as the groom's mother, handle this. This has put us in a very awkward situation and I am not liking it at all. She calls me and then immediately calls our son and is leaving nasty messages on both phones. Threatening messages, may be a better word for it. By the way, grandma is also my mom.
Curious as to who is paying for the wedding?
x
La Venta Inn wedding - what to wear???
I've been invited to a wedding in CA at the LA Venta Inn the weekend of Thanksgiving. I would like some input on what to wear. Looks like a pretty nice place and I know they are trying for a sunset wedding ceremony - like around 4:30 with the reception at the Inn afterwards. I know it gets cool in the evenings, but if anyone has any suggestions on what to wear - I would appreciate it. Sounds like a formal or semi-formal affair. Thanks.
My father's 4th wedding was HUGE
They had a big Victorian wedding. They had a huge rehersal dinner, wedding and reception. She was married once before and had a small wedding. She wanted a big wedding. Maybe your father and this lady want to have a party with their friends and family?
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