The teacher was wrong, but
Posted By: OldMT on 2009-03-31
In Reply to: Son's teacher tells his classmates he has ADHD... - Stressed mom of 3
I can understand her frustration. I think she was trying to help your son. I think these other kid's parents need to be informed of what their kids are doing. They're bullying your son and no child should have to go through that. There are policies against it in almost every school district. If these other kids can't control their mouths and actions, then maybe they need to be suspended or moved to another class. I'll bet if their parents were told that, the kids would straighten up in a hurry. Name calling is just as much bullying as actually touching somebody.
Complete Discussion Below:  marks the location of current message within thread
The messages you are viewing
are archived/old.
To view latest messages and participate in discussions, select
the boards given in left menu
Other related messages found in our database
If SHE (the teacher) brought it up then it is very, very wrong. If a child brought it up
it is still wrong for her to answer with the truth -- but lying wouldn't really be acceptable either. In the case of the child asking her she should tell the child to ask their parents.
I would assume the scenario was something like one child telling another child that there was no Santa and that child then asking the teacher. Not wanting to lie about it the teacher told the truth. Anyone teaching children that age, at this time of year, should have a prepared statement for that type of situation. "You need to ask your Mommy or Daddy that question."
You ead my response wrong, terribly wrong
I am trying to ask what does she think it will help, not being nasty- tell me and I will try this. I would stand on my head and gargle peanut butter if I thought it would help - I wanted to know why a letter? They are thumbing their noses at the courts - commanded to appear- I was there and they werent.
teacher
The law better get to her before I do!!
I had a teacher like that when I was 7, and I
went from never wanting to miss a day of learning at school, to depression, stomach aches (both real and fake, to get me sent home), and from then on detested every minute spent in school. It only takes one rotten teacher to ruin your future.
Where is the teacher from?
Where I am from, everyone uses terms like sweetie, honey, hun, sugar, etc., interchangeably for males and females. They are terms of kindness and not necessarily terms of intimate endearment or disparaging sexisms. Now if she called your child something along the lines of Sugar Britches that would be another matter.
From a teacher's
perspective. I taught Adult School but I had some high school students in my class. We were mandated by state law to report all weapons, threats, signs of abuse immediately. If a report was made to a teacher it had to be reported to the administration and administration had to report it to the local authorities. If administration took no action in your son's case, heads should be rolling about now. I would contact the local police department (go in in person if you can) and report the incident to them. Tell them what your child has witnessed, been threatened with, overheard, the "harm list" etc. and ask the police to handle the case. If the school knew about it and didn't act on it and heads roll so be it. I would rather have a school administrator fired than have even one child injured/killed let alone another Columbine incident. It is the school's responsibility and they have apparently dropped the ball, so go over their heads. One more question, who is this kid? Someone high up in your city, parent's have money, pull or social status? In other words is it being glossed over because of whose kid it is?
That was the letter he was given by the teacher. nm
x
What a good teacher you are. sm
You're not only making the parents happy, but showing a good example to the kids. Good for you and Merry Christmas.
Yes I would - it's not the teacher's place to do this....sm
shouldn't they be spending time teaching anyway instead of being worried about what kids do and don't believe in outside of the classroom?
Teachers are being allowed to do whatever they want this day in time. My high schooler listens to her biology teacher rant and rave each day about the "evils" of eating meat and she's sick of hearing it every day and is anxious for the end of the semester next week to get rid of this obsessive teacher.
To the teacher? Sadly, nothing. To my son: SM
I just told him that sadly some people don't believe in Angels and God, but that we know they are for real. I told him about different things that have happened in our lives that showed us that they were real and told him we should just remember to pray for his teacher at night and to just not talk about it with her at school.
I was really mad at her and practiced in my head what I wanted to say to her, but unfortunately (or fortunately) I never had the guts to confront her about it. I thought I was over it (this happened 8 years ago!), but I'm feeling angry all over again right now. Oh well...let it go Chickadee! :) 
Chickadee
teacher's gift
If your kid has the teacher in the above posting, you could send him a few good lesbian porno websites.
Don't everyone tell me how rotten I am - it was too funny to see this post right after the one about the teacher with the porn on his computer.
A teacher at my son's school...
on the radio! Isn't that AWESOME...especially since teachers are highly underpaid...just wanted to share...
for teacher of 6 years
My son is graduating from 5th grade this year. He's had a most wonderful speech therapist at school for the last 6 years, and I would like to get her something really nice, but appropriate. She is a super speech therapist, and just one of the sweetest people. She really helped my son with his speech impediment, and I'ld like to show my appreciation in some way materially. Any suggestions? Thanks
I would talk with the teacher first
some of the above posts are wanting to tar and feather- it is NORMAL having a period. Do you stop your life when pregnant?? I was talking to the post about why get an excuse from a physician to lay out when on a period. These children now are a lot more advanced than we were in years past and boys, even in their immaturity, know about periods and such. Kids are going to sex classes together long before 13 and OMG, they learn things such as this. I would never ever listen to a child before talking with the adult involved and make sure the story is straight- then and only then would I either talk with the teacher 1:1 or if no satisfaction then, talk with highers. I posted to the listing above saying to get excuse from physician. That is laughable.
Talk with the teacher
I would schedule a meeting with the teacher. Tell her your daughter handles the tasks concerning her with no problem at home and ask what exactly is going on that has her concerned.
I would also talk with your child to see if any of her comments shed some insight into how things are going at school and the type of interaction with the teacher.
Kindergarten teacher
My little one just started kindergarten this year, and already I am getting flak from the teacher. She called me to tell me that my daughter is having problems putting papers in her folder, and that it seems like her hands get flustered when shes trying to do tasks like this. She also tells me that I need to make her do things around the house, like clean up her toys, take her dinner plate to the sink, etc. (all of these things that she has been doing for a while now!), so of course I just say okay, not wanting to seem like a smarty pants by telling her she already does these things. After I got off the phone I gave my daughter papers and a folder and told her to put them inside. She did, without a problem at all. Well, I was dropping her off this morning and I was walking her downstairs to her class and I had her lunch box in my hand from when we got out of the car, and they have this basket that they put the lunches in that sits outside of the door. So as I am walking out I just put it in the basket and go to leave, and the teacher (who was heading towards the classroom) makes it a point to stop in front of me and tells me that I need to let her do these things on her own and not to do them for her. It took all I had not to explode in her face! If I happen to be carrying her lunch box and just put it in the basket myself, I see no problem with that. Its also the demeanor of this teacher that I don't like...kind of like one of those people who "tries to be helpful and nice" but is actually condescending and rude. I wanted to say, Lady, why don't you get your nose out of my business and go teach the class? UGH. She just drives me up one side of the wall and down the other!!
daycare teacher
Ask her about it. See how she reacts. Maybe she is in the military. Maybe she doesn't know its posted. You just never know. Ask her.
I would definitely talk to the teacher -sm
and have your child moved aware from this nut case. When I was in 2nd grade a boy came up to me on the playground and stabbed me with a pencil in my forearm, nice puncture wound.....I do not remember anything being done to him in terms of a punishment, cannot ask my mom as she died a few years ago. I hated that kid from that day on though. Get this, he is now a doctor.
Here's to my Home Ec teacher!
All this discussion reminds me of my Home Ec class. We took the class in grades 5-8. This would have been 1973 to 1976. The boys took shop class, and the girls went to Home Ec. In 8th grade, we were allowed to choose shop or home ec, and I still chose Home Ec.
My teacher was Mrs. Moffet, and she was wonderful. The women in my family were also great teachers, but Mrs. Moffet was great, too. In our small, close-knit community of Italian immigrants, I don't think there was a young lady my age who didn't already know how to make bread and pasta by hand, sew from a pattern, and clean house. Still, Mrs. Moffet taught us lots of great things. We made clothing and had a fashion shows every year. And I still remember her teaching us how to make doughnuts. LOL I've never done that since, but it was fun that day. We snacked on warm doughnuts and drank REAL hot chocolate that we made. I do still make real hot chocolate, and every time I do, I think of Mrs. Moffet's smiling face. She was elderly in those days, so I'm sure she's no longer on this earth. Mrs. Moffet, wherever you are, here's to you!
::: raises cup of cocoa :::
I would say something to the teacher of the class
They should be the one to stop this chick from preventing other kids from having one.
I wouldn't say anything to her parents, though. That is the teacher's job if they feel so inclined to do so.
Why isn't the teacher of the class saying something as it happens? nm
x
Are you going to tell us what happened when you confronted the teacher?
x
Absolutely. Is teacher teaching sex ed also? nm
//
what are you giving your child's teacher
I was thinking some sort of gift card...I'm sure she is overloaded with trinkets and Christmas ornaments, etc. Any creative suggestions? 
MERRY CHRISTMAS...
another female teacher found having sex
with her students, 14 and 15 yo boys! This makes me sick. I swear, if a teacher ever touched my son I don't know what I'd do.
more on the perp - teacher referred him to
this was one very disturbed young man...
http://www.wdbj7.com/Global/story.asp?S=6384077
There are reports tonight that a Virginia Tech professor was so disturbed by a work of fiction written by suspected shooter Cho Seung-Hui, she recommended he get counseling.
The website, thesmokinggun.com, is featuring a play written by Cho Seung-Hui. It involves a chainsaw, profane language, and ends with a deadly blow to a teenage boy.
In it, the boy accuses the stepfather of murdering his dad. In one part, the 13-year-old character repeats how much he hates his stepfather and rambles on how he needs to kill him.
Classmates say that on the first day of a British literature class last year, students took turns introducing themselves. When it was Cho Seung-Hui's turn to speak, he said nothing.
The professor then looked at the sign-in sheet, and noticed that Cho had written a question mark instead of his name.
The professor asked, "Is your name 'Question mark?"' A classmate, Julie Poole, says Cho offered little response.
She says he then spent much of the class sitting in the back of the room, wearing a hat and seldom participating.
Poole says, "We just really knew him as the question mark kid."
It's nice that teacher won the money, but they are not
highly underpaid. Both my sisters and my brother-in-law teach or have taught in the past and they were paid well for the number of hours they work(ed). Yes, they have to go for 4 years secondary education and they have to put off with misbehaving children for 7 hours a day, but they are not underpaid.
What would your teacher sisters say to your views?
kli
Being a student is completely different than being a teacher.
io
Something I've done for each teacher my kids
have had is to get a frame from Things Remembered and engrave the year on it with a picture of my child. They all loved this gift a lot. You could always engrave something along with the year if you wanted. If you want to add something to it, I know most people love to get a $5 or $10 gift card to somewhere like Starbucks or get her a nice box of chocolates.
I would have a meeting with principal or teacher.
Wow, how inappropriate of that teacher! I would definitely talk to the teacher's higher ups or to the teacher personally. That is unacceptable. Your poor daughter! Could she possibly be switched to another class instead of swimming for now? That gym teacher seriously crossed the line into territory that was none of his/her(?) business and will probably continue to do it to her and others if no one stops him/her(?). I would be very upset if I were you too!
I agree that the teacher was out of line.
Absolutely, no way, no how should a child be humiliated in this way, and a conference is absolutely appropriate.
Regarding the issue of tampon use, I'd like to put in my 2 cents. We are all built differently, we all have different tolerances and thresholds of discomfort. For me, I will tell you that I won't go near pads at all. I had my first period at 11 "back in the day" when we had giant thick pillows crammed between our legs with nasty little belts that clipped to the pads and twisted and turned whenever you moved. I hated them. I asked my mom about tampons. She was horrified! She was sure that using them would destroy my virginity and turn me into a wanton woman. (My mother is kind of repressed.) I've always been extremely independent, and yes, somehat defiant. So, without mother's permission, I used my allowance, went to the drug store and bought my own tampons. In those days, tampons were little more than cotton lollipops. But I preferred them over the icky pads we had back then. I have been using tampons ever since, with is now over 35 years. Tampons have come a very long way. There are many different styles, and for many women, we'd never use pads unless we absolutely had to. I'm 46 with no sign of menopause yet. (sigh) But, I'm thankful for tampons. I've been able to be more active, hiking, swimming, running, etc., during my periods.
I suggest that once your daughter is comfortable with this new stage of her life, you buy an assortment of different tampons. Examine them, read the inserts, let her try some, and maybe she'll actually like them.
In the meantime, that teacher needs to be set straight! Surely, in a school that includes swimming as part of a PE program, the issue of menstruating teens has come up before and will again. Everyone needs to get on the same page and have some compassion for the girls.
I would be mad, but if she is not the teacher or coach then her opinion is just that,
I would tell your how you feel and that it was rude of her to say that to you.
Your daugher has valid excuses for missing, but you should not have to explain them to anyone but the person in charge of the team. Maybe if you dont want to say anything, just give her the cold shoulder and she might get the hint, then if she says - why the cold shoulder? - let her have it!
Would like opinions about a school/teacher
Just looking for outside viewpoints about this scenario:
A child with autism, so perception issues, believes that his teacher hates him and the teacher is aware of this. So, a couple of weeks after discussion with the teacher, she states to the class, "You know what I hate about ______ (insert child's name here)? When he acts like I'm a complete idiot . . ."
Aack! I'd be having me a talk with the teacher
or if you are not comfortable just one on one, requesting a meeting with the principal and with the teacher. My son also has perception issues (in the process of being evaluated for Asperger's, has come home before saying his teacher hates him) and I would NOT be happy if his teacher said such a thing!
You need to talk to teacher before believing what a
x
When my son was 3 he once said to his nursery school teacher . . .
"Do you have nipples". Came out of the blue. Just ran up to her one morning and blurted that one out. I'm sure it was related to the fact that his little brother was an infant and nursing. It had us all laughing, but I was still embarrassed. No lead-up to that one at all! I was glad he only went two mornings a week. At least I didn't have to face her EVERY morning! :)
a transcription teacher told me,
"Say you will, and then go to it, that's the only way to do it!" I wrote that in my Taber's 30+ years ago, and still like it :)
My son's kindergarten teacher calls him
that all the time. How old is the child we are talking about and the sex of the child/teacher?
There's just not enough information to give an opinion.
With you it's ok, you are a parent, a friend, whatever, but a teacher?...nm
nm
I was a teacher's and parent's dream
I was the sort of kid who'd ruin the curve for everyone else. I studied all the time, had straight A's, was the Editor of the school paper and the yearbook, worked in the school office, and graduated at the top of my class. About the most outlandish thing I did was get a part-time job at Burger King. eek!
My experience as a substitute teacher is that this is very normal
behavior for children at her age. Please remember that we just got through a worldwind of holidays and their schedules have been off as far as structure. Almost every child right now is going through this disruptive behavior, because believe it or not, children truly want structure in their lives and thrive upon it. No, it does not make it acceptable and I am the biggest stinker about my children acting appropriately in school. Like I tell my children, I cannot make you gets As in all your subjects, but I can make you responsible for your behavior.
Anyhow, I think the apology to the teacher itself would have been an appropriate punishment at her young age, as children truly want nothing more than acceptance.
BTW, her age level is tough right now. After the winter holidays they ALL seem to get tattling and boisterous and whenever I have to teach kindergartners in the Sprin I pray VERY hard. It is all part of them establishing their identities. You are a very good mother for being so concerned and proactive, but just try to take this stepping stone with a little bit of patience and glory....she is growing up!! Hugs to you!!!
High school teacher rudeness...sm
My daughter got a role in the upcoming spring musical. The drama teacher hasn't published a practice schedule and so far my daughter has called every day with the time to be picked up. I've sent the teacher 2 e-mails asking for a written only to get no response. Today I've sent her another e-mail with a CC to the principal stating this is very rude of her to not publish a schedule and expect parents to be available "whenever" she feels like having practice end with the kids not being told the schedule until they arrive to drama class. My daughter says that several kids have told the drama teacher that they couldn't stay on some of these days she's called practice after school.
Have any of you ever encountered such rudeness and unpreparedness by a teacher? If she doesn't give us a schedule by the end of this week then my husband has told our daughter that she will have to drop out of the play. Practices so far have ended anywhere between 4:30-7:00 and I'm not going to sit around every day trying to guess what time they'll be done. Plus my daughter doesn't have a cell phone and we're not getting her one just to use for this. She's having to go to the school office to call us on her lunch time and miss part of lunch to place this call.
Where is this school district. My daughter the teacher has
ikl
Can you afford at least a 50% paycut? Here in the SE, our teacher's aides don't sm
make more than 10.00 per hour and that is for experienced TAs. You will probably start out at 7.50 to 8.00 an hour.
But, if you just need a little spending money and think that your peace of mind is worth that much in pay, then you should go for it.
I'm a great advocate in doing what you love most in order to be happy in life. Have a dream or vision and then go after it no matter what it takes. Those kind of people live the healthiest, happiest lives. Good luck to you!
That's for sure, but my nephew's wife is a school teacher and
actually lost a job some years back because she took a child by the shoulder to calm him down after disrupting the class. They are not permitted to do anything, and God knows so many of the homes these kids come from don't offer any kind of structure or discipline. It is a shame, but we are just letting the morals and beliefs we once stood for be taken over by thugs. The neighborhood I grew up in as a child was once a very nice neighborhood. No one dares go there now. It is in bad shape and filled with drugs and violence. It breaks my heart. 
Wow - that sounds uncalled for on the teacher's part. sm
I think I would have had to bite my tongue not to say something too like stick your nose in your own business, LOL! I think I'd have a talk with the school counselor or principal and/or request a class change. You have that right. Teachers make a huge impression on our children and I would not put up with that.
IMHO school and teacher were about as far off base as you can go...
Anytime you work around another person, you subject yourself to being called names. The "American Public" needs to suck it up a bit. If a teacher can't handle being called a name behind his/her back, he/she has no business being a teacher or in any position of authority. Bosses get called names behind their backs all the time BY ADULTS who are quite well behaved, and children are notorious for wearing their emotions on their sleeves.
Had there been a threat involved, had it been done on school property, or had the kid called the name to the face (insubordination), then the school would have had a complaint. In the absence of any of the above, school has no business there.
Were it my kid, I would explain discretion and drive on. Some of my kid's teachers have been *****es, and I have no problem with calling a spade a spade, but I do have issues with insubordination. A personal blog from home is in no way insubordination at school.
FLAME AWAY, but the kid has as much right to state her opinion as anyone else, and sometimes the truth hurts. I'm fat. I accept that. If someone points it out to me, it hurts my feelings, but it doesn't make me skinny. BTW, I'm also a b***h in certain circumstances, and have no desire to change. As a society, we need to quit being afraid someone isn't going to like us or might call us a name and realize we're no better than spinach in that some folks will like us and some won't, and that should not change our individual purposes a single bit. Used to be we were taught "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me". Now we've decided that words are as bad as sticks and stones. When you cause someone to swallow their feelings long enough, something's going to break, and then you'll be lucky to just get sticks and stones. IMHO, this is where the root of much of the violence is, and if we'd quit trying to be Orwell's Thought Police, we might actually see a reduction in violence, suicide, and depression.
A wise 1st grade teacher told us...
"If you won't believe that I was mean to your kids, I won't believe that you had dog food for dinner last night."
Question about son, school, teacher, and boyfriend
Okay, please tell me I am wrong -
Today I went to my son's school for a parent/teacher conference. My boyfriend went on Monday to pick up his report card, as my son, daughter, and I were out of state at a funeral. My son did not do well at all this marking period and it is basically due to his laziness. Well, evidently, on Monday the teacher and the boyfriend had a lengthy discussion and came up with the punishment and the plan for the next 9 weeks of school. I was informed of his report card via phone call Monday night and told we needed to be there for a conference on Thursday - nope, no conference requested until now, so I mistakenly assumed he was okay in school.
Okay, go to the conference with boyfriend and from the start I can tell I am really not part of the plan by the seating arrangements. My son is at the front, they AR on each side of him and I am somewhere towards the back. Boyfriend takes control and the teacher pretty much turns all conversation to him and son. I try to intervene on several occasions and sort of get lost by THEIR dialogue. THEY decide that whenever there is a problem she will call boyfriend and let him know and then refers to both of us as "parental units" and I sort of start seething now. I try over and over to be heard and ask questions, all the time pretty mmuch brushed to the back burner.
Fast forward a bit - the teacher walk out of the room and I follow her and tell her that I am NOT a "parental unit" but his mother and that all and any conversations about my son's welfare will be had with me and to only call me. She looked at me like she was baffled
I know that I gave the boyfriend too much rope there (we do all live together) in the first place, but all I expected him to do was pick up the report card, not decide his life and the teacher never called me previously to tell me there was a problem in the first place, so why would I think any different Please advise me on this because I feel like dirt right now.
TIA!!!
oh, I definitely understand - just telling you what a teacher told me... nm
x
|
