The guest list is up to the bride & groom....sm
Posted By: Georgia Gal on 2007-04-24
In Reply to: Son's wedding - Grandma is insisting - that certain people be invited that our son
no one else! Of course if grandma wants to foot the bill for the wedding then I'm sure they'd consider her desires.
Complete Discussion Below:  marks the location of current message within thread
The messages you are viewing
are archived/old.
To view latest messages and participate in discussions, select
the boards given in left menu
Other related messages found in our database
stick to your guns and let the bride and groom decide who they would like at the wedding(sm)
Twenty years ago there were 150 people at my wedding. I knew MAYBE 20 of them. My parents INSISTED on inviting every single long-distance cousin and relative, most of whom I (and certainly my husband) did not know and had never met. Granted, MA and Dad were paying for the wedding but I've always felt like I missed out on having MY wedding because, in order to stay within their budget, I only invited about five or ten friends. And my husband and his parents felt like they COULDN'T invite anyone because of the budget restraints and my parents' guest list. We ended up with about 20 people on my husband's side of the church (basically his immediate family), three of his friends, five of mine, and the rest were mostly my distant, DISTANT unknown relatives (with a few close relatives scattered among the many distants). I look back now and wish that I had taken better charge of the situation. It certainly would have cost my parents less money because I wasn't going to invite that many people.
Are you the hostess or the guest for this Thanksgiving? If a guest, what
s
Rotten Tomatoes list the 50 best scary movies. Good list.
xx
I am a very happy mother of the groom
Having an only child I have never experienced preparing a wedding previously. I had fun but I had no idea how much work goes into one of these weddings. However, it was a beautiful ceremony, beautiful day, and a whole lot of fun. The kids are married and extremely happy. The mother and father of the groom cannot ask for anything more and our blessings go to our "children." Just had to share this wonderful experience!!
RE: Help on mother of the groom dress - see message
I'm only 47 and don't want a "matronly" dress. Wedding is in 6 weeks and I need help. Any suggestions?
Beautiful bride!
Congratulations to ALL of you ;-)
Are you serious? What bride pays for the dresses? LOL
x
You are not unreasonable...the bride sounds..
like a pain, I feel sorry for the groom! If she does not like your dress she can buy you a new one and any accessories you might need to go along with it. Or you can simply not be the keeper of the guest book, which is what I would do if I were you! Good luck and don't feel bad! If this ruins her "special day" she is pretty shallow!
Gaaa.... what a snotty bride! Here's what I would do -sm
Tell her you'll 'look around for something, but at this late date you don't know if you'll find anything.' Then WEAR the red dress. Totally do your hair and makeup, and you're gonna look SMASHING. Go ahead and look better than the bride. Serves her right for being so snotty.
And oh, yeah - 'Guest Book Monitor' - BLEAH. The first wedding I ever went to was my best junior high friend's wedding. But I guess I was no longer even a 'good' friend in high school or jr. college, 'cause at her wedding I was left out of the wedding party and told I had to be in charge of the guest book.
I stood by it in the church, and that allowed me to have my preferred seating.... way in the back of the church! Then at the reception, there was that danged book again, and her mom telling me I had to make sure EVERYONE signed it. Well, I lasted maybe 5 minutes, until I smelled food. After that, I left the book to it's own fate, and went in to the reception and ate to my heart's content. As soon as the cake had been cut, I got one of the first pieces. I'd been seated at a table with a bunch of older people I didn't know at all and had nothing to talk about with. Never did see my friend all day, other than walking down the aisle! So, I developed an 'upset stomach' and left early so I could go home and go for a nice long, QUIET bike ride. Didn't say goodbye to anyone. And I never signed the Guest Book, either.
Bride 65, grooom 68, 2nd marriage for both. No
asd
9-year old bride "marries"
See the link below.
I'm a guest
We go to my parent's house every year. We usually just bring some cornbread or some type of dessert.
Guest...
And all the guests bring a covered dish, a dessert, and a drink. The hostess does the meat (turkey) and a veggie or 2, plus desserts...plus all the cleaning, planning, etc., which is why I'm glad it's not my year to hostess!
Was it rude of my bride friend to register for...
My friend just got married. When I went to the store and requested a copy of the bridal registry, I found several $200-$600 items on the registry. I was shocked.
I do not know if it is proper or not, but I have always been told you "pay for your meal" in the gift you bring, so I always assume at least $75 to $100 for a sit down meal. But, she and her fiancé are both middle class at best, so I was not initially expecting a big wedding.
When I saw so many $200 to $600 on the registry, I concluded, incorrectly, that they had decided to throw a big bash. I bought my gift very late and the registry still did not show that ANY items over $150 had sold. I spent $150 on my gift, which was more than it looked like anyone else was paying, but if you wait until the last minute, your options at the low end are very limited! That is my own fault!
They actually served a very low budget buffet, prepared by neighbors and friends, for the meal. It was actually a lower budget wedding than I expected. I am not criticizing their decision to save money on the wedding. I think lots of people spend way too much money on weddings. BUT, I do think it was rather presumptuous of her to register for such pricey items when most of her friends and family cannot afford them and when she was not throwing a fancy wedding.
I am not complaining about spending $150 and not getting "my money's worth" from the meal...that is NOT my point at all. BUT, I do think if you are going to put items like that on your bridal registry you need to consider who your friends are and whether or not your circles can afford such items. I am in a financial position where I could decide to buy a $150 item, but not all of her friends could even go that high and there was very little below $100 to choose from even if they were the first ones to shop.
Is it really typical for middle class people to request such high ticket items for wedding gifts these days? Or was it actually as presumptuous as I perceive it to be?
Until they become family they are a guest...
and should sleep in the guest room like anyone else! Totally agree :)
Guest books are not new
I had one at my wedding 22 years ago. I was also guest book attendant for a friend from high school. Got there early, got to see everyone as they came in and say hi to people I hadn't seen in awhile. Not that big of a deal. Of course, she didn't tell me what I had to wear, either.
No, I mean she is the ONLY guest of honor and I am ignored (sm)
We have to celebrate how she wants, where she wants, etc. and she is lavished with attention while I am barely acknowledged as being a mother that day at all. Of course she still qualifies as a mother - but I am one too!
The bride magazines say no white, ivory, too sexy, and don't
try to match the brides maid colors. Ask the bride for her ideas of color, styles. The style should be similar to the mother of the bride, if possible, such as length. A 2 piece suit would be nice and tasteful, short for day or long for evening.
The majority of bridesmaids buy their own dresses unless bride's family
is extremely wealthy.
I've never had a bride offer to pay for the attendant's dresses. nm
s
This is tthe same bride?!?! lol, the one having bridesmaids, flower girl, etc.
and was upset about you wearing red? I absolutely thought you were talking about a much younger gal like in her 20s!
She is 65? This is just way too much!
LOL.
Why do they need someone in charge of the guest book?
You leave it on the table by the placecards, and people sign it when they get their table assignments. I have never seen anyone in charge of a guest book before. Talk about micromanaging.
Your post, she is always the guest of honor?
even though you are still raising children does not make sense to me. Do you mean once a child grows up you don’t qualify for a mother anymore?
Is it rude to ask a house guest
how long they will be staying. My MIL came Sunday to go to a doctor's appointment Monday. Well, the doctor appointment is over and it is already Wednesday and she is still here. She does tell us pretty much when she is coming but there is no end in sight. She is super sensitive and cries a lot with "you don't want me" so I don't know how to ask without any water works. I just want to know what to expect.
This is a REAL contract a bride asked her bridesmaids to sign...
*Bridesmaid’s Contract*
Hello my beautiful bridesmaids! Let me just say again how happy I am that you are going to be a part of my special day! Below are just a few guidelines for the wedding that I’d like you to review, please initial by each point, sign at the end and send back to me. Just want to make sure they’re aren’t any surprises! The planning bride is a happy bride!
Thanks a bunch! Love ya!
-The Bride-To-Be
______ My hair will remain at the length it is now or longer.
______ I will not change my hair color without first consulting BRIDE and providing a sample photo or hair swatch for consideration.
______ I will use Sally Hansen’s “Maximum Growth-Daily Nail Growth program” every day for the 4 months before the wedding day.
______ I will not gain more than 4lbs from the weight I was when I was asked to be a bridesmaid.
(Sarah and Anne only for the point below…)
______ I will join a well-known weight loss program and through whatever means necessary will lose the desired amount of weight as previously discussed with BRIDE at the time when asked to be a bridesmaid in her wedding.
______ I swear to attend all showers, (lingerie, kitchen, bridal & bachelorette) to arrive in a timely manner and do everything in my power to support and “be there” for the bride.
______ I will purchase the DESIGNER style # 464 dress below in Pistachio/Ivory within 3 weeks of today.
______ I will NOT knowingly get pregnant without notifying BRIDE at least 6 months prior to the wedding so a suitable alternate can be found. I will also give my purchased bridesmaid dress to said alternate.
I do hereby swear that I will adhere to all of the above & other understood bridesmaid duties for the wedding on DATE, 2008
X_________________________
(sign, print and date)
The other day Racheal Ray had a guest with a good suggestion.
She soaked a cotton ball with vanilla extract, placed in a cute, little glass dish and set it in her fridge. Bet that would work for you!!!
I once was assigned guest book duty.
Like you, I didn't know what that entailed. When I arrived at the reception, I was told to hold the thing as people walked up and signed it. Basically, I was a human podium. If that's what the bride wants you to do, tell her to leave it on the table! How rude of her to expect so much! Show up in the red dress and don't even sign the silly guest book!
This new guest book thing is dumb anyway
something else to add to the list of a gazilion ways to fawn all over the couple! Gag. Who really cares? Can you believe people are so full of themselves these days? It's truly mind boggling. And with the divorce rate being 50% or higher, why do they even bother?
I'd definitely be there in my red dress for sure, would maybe even stuff my bra so my cleavage popped out!
Anything to get out of the dumb guest book thing!
It's actually insulting, you too are supposed to be a guest :)
Let us know what happens!!!
Missouri wedding guest...please report in! :) nm
s
What's the point of a guest book, anyway? They'll have the cards and
s
Totally agast, unwelcomed guest, how to handle
Last Christmas my husband's nephew was invited for Christmas breakfast and his friend came along. They were from out of town. They about ate us out of house and home and the friend after breakfast helped himself to the remote, changed channels and then spread across the couch and decided to go to sleep. These guys have no manners (older group here and they are hip-hop type guys). They later went to another family's home where they again were unmannerly. Get this, now the nephew calls (we had invited some other people) and he told husband he said he would be glad to give these people a ride! I know he probably is planning to have another dinner here (now not only his friend is in town but also wife and 4 kids). I would be so mortified to have all those folks show up, I probably would be very, very rude and it would be Christmas. My husband is not confrontational and did not say anything when his nephew said he offered to bring others and from another state. Ok, what would you do in this situation? Thanks!
Brunch guest who can't have dairy or salt - snowed in!
Out of ideas! Also, looking for simple recipe for brunch requiring stuff I have on hand. Martha always has some confounded ingredient I never heard of. Lost my hash brown recipe. Have frozen hash browns, sour cream, cr. chicken soup, butter & chips, forgot how I put them all together last time. Locked in, more snow coming, zero degrees in NE, don't even know if people will make it here. I'm frustrated. Have a spiral ham on hand, thank goodness! Sounds like I'll be cooking but will they come in the stormy weather. Darned if I do, darned if I don't! The no dairy, no salt thing is driving me up the walls.
Oh well, have a happy holiday. Tip: Put furniture polish or cooking oil on your snow shovel and the snow won't stick.
A guest book attendant is not a bridal party member and should
s
None on this list but have a list of my own!!
Hanna, Tigger, Sophie, Ethyl, Wally, Pipin, Morris, Tito and Moshee.
5 awesome cats, 3 birds a-flyn' and a little dog in a pear tree!
Add another to the list (sm)
I confess I adored Clooney back in his ER days. Thought he was handsome until just a couple of weeks ago when I saw him with his Oceans 6,279 or whatever number it is gang promoting the film on a morning talk show. He looked like a little geeky guy sitting in his chair. The hair, skinnier, I don't know but something was different and it wasn't good.
Tom Cruise was great in his Risky Business days. He'd be better off now in One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest.
Josh Holloway, Liam Neeson, John Cusack and OMG I can't think of any more...any ideas?
My list
Who could only have one? They are like potato chips. All the Harry Potter Movies - do you have YOUR ticket for Wednesday?, Where the Red Fern Grows, The Big Chill, Pulp Fiction, Kill Bill I and II, Better off Dead, Gone With the Wind, One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, Casablanca, Driving Miss Daisy, Rear Window, Chronicles of Narnia - The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, The Passion of the Christ, School of Rock, The Crow, Braveheart, The Secret Garden, all the Jason Bourne Movies, The Labyrinth. I have to stop now and go watch one before I fall asleep! I am glad to see all those wonderful movies on here. Now I am reminded of old favorites that I want to watch again and ones I don't own for my collection I share with my daughters.
Add me to the list
My daughter and I pretend that we "miss" the actual real ending of the commercial, when the people come back and take this sweet doggie!
my list
Viagara, Cialis, retirement villages, multi million sports figures stating they drive a Buick or a Ford. Insurance salesmen with one foot in the grave themselves, on-line schools with degrees in 18 months guaranteed, mattress ads, especially designed by designers, you sleep on them for ,,,,sake, you don't wear them! teeth whiteners, wrinkle removers, energy drinks, hair growth products, More - breast enhancers, jewelry that is overpriced, self-help videos, miracle sponges and mops that clean by themselves, Chia, free-trial money-back guarantees (you never send them back), anything with 12 easy payments, no money down; free stuff where you just pay shipping. And that's only a partial list - no room for all of them and no room to make this perfect English or punctuation. There are on-line courses for this, just send them your credit card number and they will make you a college grad in no time!
Top of my list...
Friday Night Lights, finally back on NBC after being on Direct TV only since fall.
2-1/2 Men
The Office
Grey's Anatomy
2nd list....
sounds fun!
Now to find the time to do my own.. LOL
going to add to the list
One thing that I did when my kids were growing up in the80s was to make a "garbage omlet" (sorry for the typos working up until recently -- but what I did was if there really weren't enough leftovers in the fridge to make a meal, meat, veggies, etc, I would beat eggs up and combine everything along with cheddar cheese and I am on a very frugal budget right now as well -- our local Publix has had Hillshire Farm lunch meat on sale for several months at $4/for 2 packages - I clip the coupons which are $1 of for 3 -- I buy things on special when at ALL possible -- went shopping the other day and spent $200 but the freezer and fridge are packed and that is for me and when S/O is here for 3.5 days -- I basically "create" and one of the things I do is make my own wraps -- buy tortillas on sale, again, Hillshire Farm and for S/O'S lunch, wrap in plastic wrap to hold together -- he will also take leftovers.
One experiment that I did the other day and was great, but I made macaroni salad with no mayo -- took Albacore tuna -- a large can, cooked and drained macaroni, italian dressing, 3 hard boiled eggs -- 3-4 greek olives and your own "seasonings to taste" but here in FL with hot weather or any place NO mayo -- I can only give basic ingredients because I have SELDOM followed a book as far as making anything and this is from someone whom from back in the 70s couldnt even make Jello :) -- go for the roasts, chicken breasts etc -- but try to think too, of meals that rather "prepared you can make from scratch" A pork roast, beef roast, chuck roast, ham, can be sandwiches, BBQ, chunked into salads etc. Sorry, EXHAUSTED after working all day but trying to help -- OOPS forgot about this -- a PREPARED fruit salad with "lunch meat ham" shredded up makes a quick -- hot weather fix as well -- be CREATIVE and good luck
My Do Not Eat List
Oatmeal
Tofu
Sushi
Beans of any kind
Beets
liver
Sweet cereals
Salmon or fatty fish
Raw veggies (can't eat)
Know there are more, but all I can think of for now.
my list
Sushi,
or any raw fish, makes me gag
Liver
Eggs,
when not fully cooked,
Okra,
in a restaurant, only prepared by me
Eggplant,
in a restaurant, only prepared by me
Tripe
I have more pets than 10! Not one on the list!
Dogs - Ziggy Stardurst and Mello Yello, and Moe. Cats - Michael Jackson and Dr. Finkelstein (daughter's fave dictator), Rabbits - Dobby, Lupin, Binky, Marshmallow, Snitch, Fleuffer, George and Fred - are you sensing a heavy Harry Potter theme here?? Pumpkin and Radad. And my 2 black bear hamsters - guy and girl - Joey and Zora...Now does anybody remember that pair?? Other hamsters Bob, Faramir, Oompah and SweetTart. Any donations will be gladly accepted for my zoo........
Do not call list
 There is a national "Do Not Call List" that you can put not only your home land line on but also your cell phone number on. You sign up on-line via the Internet and you remain on the list for 5 years at which time you have to re-enroll your phone numbers. It is not enough to "ask" to be put on the "do not call list" you must go to the national website and sign yourself up. If you are called by a company after you have put your number on the national "do not call list" you can call the Attorney General and the company will be fined $1,500.00. Hope this helps! We have all our numbers on the list home phone/cell phones and our numbers are unlisted as well.
Do not call list
There is a national "Do Not Call List" that you can put not only your home land line on but also your cell phone number on. You sign up on-line via the Internet and you remain on the list for 5 years at which time you have to re-enroll your phone numbers. It is not enough to "ask" to be put on the "do not call list" you must go to the national website and sign yourself up. If you are called by a company after you have put your number on the national "do not call list" you can call the Attorney General and the company will be fined $1,500.00. Hope this helps! We have all our numbers on the list home phone/cell phones and our numbers are unlisted as well.
Restrictions you list..
All of the above restrictions are things that any one with a little bit of sense would WANT to do. They are meant to protect, not restrict. I gladly wear a seat belt, riding motorcycle helmet is for the person, not the government and the transfat---- that should have been banned years ago along with other food addictives that do nothing for our health and only hurt us. In my home we only use olive oil in cooking and do not frequent the fast food joints. We try to buy good food that is as pure as we can get for our cooking here. I do not care to have other folks smoking around me, definitely not in my home. I think what you named above are for our health.
I thought you were going to have a list
About the divorced men with kids living at home with their parents...I can understand their situation. After I got divorced, my kids lived with my ex and I paid child support. It was impossible for me to live on my own and pay CS, even when I got a job that doubled my yearly income. The more I made, the more my CS payment went up. I respect someone whose priority is being financially and emotionally responsible to their children after divorce, even if it means being judged a "momma's boy" for living with his parents for a while. On the upside of that, too, is the fact that not just any old new woman in his life is going to be brought home to meet the parents (usually). They usually wait until they find a special someone to bring them over to meet the family. Remember, I doubt that the ex-wife is just sitting at home twiddling her thumbs minding the kids. Most ex-wives DO date after divorce (otherwise there would be fewer blended families/second marriages), so I don't see any difference between the ex-hubbie and the ex-wife. JMHO
Anbesol is on my list....
Going to Walmart after my shift.
That was one of the most hated on the list! (nm)
x
cookies...quite a list..
This will get you in an early holiday mood.... and if you don't bake...send the list to someone as a big hint!!!
JUST CLICK ON THE NAME OF THE COOKIE AND BAM, THE RECIPE IS THERE. GOOD TO KEEP HANDY FOR THE HOLIDAYS.
Disgustingly Rich Brownies
|
 |
|
 |
|
