The father has as much rights as the mother to make decisions....sm
Posted By: Georgia Gal on 2007-04-09
In Reply to: Holiday custodial woes - Grammie
about the child, gifts, etc. I know you want what is best for the child but it's really between your daughter and ex-son-in-law to discuss this. Even if your daughter doesn't want this, there's nothing she can do about it other than educate the child about how much candy to eat at once is appropriate.
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- Holiday custodial woes - Grammie
- The father has as much rights as the mother to make decisions....sm - Georgia Gal
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It was the father-in-law and mother-in-law..
of the men's volleyball coach and the father-in-law died...
If the father is only 1/2 black and mother white...sm
then of course the child is not going to have a lot of black features with only 1/4 black heritage. Not like a child with 1/2 black heritage. These children of MJ's are supposed to be 1/2 black. They do not look like they have any black features. I have always believed they weren't biologically his. They doesn't make them any less his children, but to tell the truth I never really bought into the fact that his children could be that white. First of all, he did not want to be black himself I don't think. Why else would he lighten his skin to the extent he did? Also he never married a black woman. He preferred white both times he married. It just screams out that he wasn't comfortable with his race.
Her mother is a piece of trash. So is that biological father.
nm
his mother is 100% white - father is indian and black - nm
xx
mmmm.. decisions, decisions...
Vincent D'onofrio (cause I LOVE him), and Gerard Butler cause that accent is just too sexy. We have a doctor here that has an accent similar to that and we all fight over who gets to type him, LOL.
A single mother by choice does not make them a welfare
recipient and/or a bad person. Heck, I would be more inclined to put that person as unselfish and determined. You chose the easy way out, the single mother took on her commitment and took the responsibility.
Decisions, decisions
I would go for the cheaper place - because I would be out doing things. I would not pay for the amenities unless I was planning to stay in the condo all the time and sit by their pool.
The guys will have no trouble finding a golf course - they are all over the place here in Florida. The condo owners can probably help you with the course fees and tell you which courses would be likely to have tee times available at the time your guys want to play.
Have a wonderful time! Remember, it's rainy season here and you may be holed up in the condo for half the time you're here - so bring some books to read, DVDs to watch, or plan some indoor activities like museum visits, or movies, etc.
FLA-USA - GO GATORS!
husband decisions
Sounds like my hubby. My kids absolutely adore him, but they work for everything they get from him. He must be a bit of a control freak, too. I am really tired of my husband making dumb decisions that I don't agree on and putting us in difficult situations. He gets "tunnel vision" and sees what he wants to see, there is absolutely nothing I can do. He nags me to the point of giving in. He is worse than the children. Then HE gets mad when I get mad,and tries to turn it back on me. He's very manipulative. It's exhausting also, especially the situation you described. Not fair; if she worked for four hours, she should get the same amount as big bro, don't care what she did. I hear you.
I know - and I really want out of transcription NOW - thus, the decisions! nm
x
Do you ever question your husband's decisions? Does he get mad? (sm)
 My husband got our kids to rake leaves Sunday for about 4 hours and told them he would pay them for it. Son is 10 and big for his age, daughter is 7 and smaller. They both worked hard, to the best of their abilities. I was cleaning the inside of the house while husband was raking with the kids. I went out several times and told them they could take a break if they wanted to and brought them water. He never offers them a break and he got aggravated when I did that. Last night he brought home the money to pay them and gave my son $20 and gave daugher $8. She was upset because she worked hard too but was afraid to talk to him about it. I encouraged her repeatedly to go outside (where he was) and talk to him and state her case, but she wouldn't go. Finally, reluctantly, I went out and tried to talk to him and he was furious with me, as I knew he would be. He said "what are you even doing out here talking to me about this??" He said he paid her what she was worth and that a 7-year-old girl can't accomplish a lot. I told him that the point was she had done her best and worked as hard as she was able. He then started fussing at me about the fact that I had gone out and offered them breaks and said that I was always worried about him "working them too hard" and that is why our son is overweight (adding to that a comment about the size of my rear). I told him that overworking an overweight child occasionally is not the answer to him losing weight. It just went on and on until I was very hurt and upset. Then he walked in the house and told my daughter, "Don't worry sweetheart, daddy is going to give you some more money tomorrow." and acted as if he had intended to all along and wasn't upset about anything.
Also, I tend to look back at decisions I made and (sm)
question whether I made the right decision. I will blame myself for things...but then often when I look back and think through exactly how I came to the decision that I ended up with, I remember how things were at that time, and how I felt, and I know that if I was in the same situation again, I would make the same decision. I bet you would too. You don't seem like the type of person who would make a big decision like that lightly. I am in the process of making a decision about divorcing. I am a Christian and I think I have probably stayed way longer than I should have. However, I have been praying hard lately, and asking others to pray for me, and things have been miraculously lining up and I believe pointing toward divorce. I am not expecting a bed of roses, nor to be rid of my husband, but I am hoping and praying for some oasis of peace in between his visits.
nobody has taken your rights away...sm
however, I personally think you are wrong to think abortion is okay and that you don't believe in god. but that is none of my business either. I am not stopping you from doing what you want to do. But even though you do not believe in god, you must still have a conscience and know that killing another being is wrong. JMO. may god have mercy on your soul.
My rights
Okay, so the school takes the kids on a field trip to see the gay marriage of their teacher and this is a because the school considers it a learning experience? And so, too bad to those people whose religion this goes against. But if I were a teacher or ran a school and it was decided that we would be taking our children on a field trip to say a Christian church or maybe Israel where Jesus lived and died, you know totally as a learning experience and to teach them the history of a man that many people, even those who are not Christians, believed to have lived, there would be world wide riots! Parents would be spitting mad, the school would be sued, it would be national news and I would be fired. It would be againts people's beliefs and I would be "shoving my religion down their throats" and blah blah blah.
Being gay is a sin. I didn't come up with that God Our Father and Creator made that one up. The Bible speaks VERY plainly about it many times. Tolerance does NOT mean agreement. Tolerance is NOT accepting something that is wrong. Saying that it is wrong is NOT intolerance. I dont think that someone who is gay should be shunned, beaten, publically humiliated. That is tolerance.
If you already have visitation rights. sm
Sounds like her rights to see her son are totally controlled by the dad.
You can but no one else can? Exercise those rights
x
Gays have been trying to get rights
since the 1950's. Gays only want to be treated and have the same rights as heterosexuals. You have such hatred for gays that I feel sorry for you but then again, it is fear and ignorance that people such as yourself feel this way. There is a high suicide rate of gay children because of the bullying. We are no different than you and I can assure you we do not shove any type of agenda down your throats. I am sure you are the type that if your son or daughter came out to you, you would disown them. Now you tell me what kind of a parent is that? We pay our bills, taxes, own houses, etc., so what is so different from you and from me in daily living? So sad there are still homophobes this day and age.
I think I agree with you - first amendment rights.
Personally I would come down hard on the kid at home, but if I had to I would get ACLU to defend his right to say it.
What about 1st amend. rights of mom who posted
x
I am exercising my first amendment rights!!
nm
Where are the rights of the child being told she has
as
We are not talking about denying their rights. If anything
they would actually be getting more rights than heterosexual students because they would be getting a school designed for them. Plenty of heterosexual high schoolers are harrassed and bullied and nowhere is there a school dedicated to serving these kids. They are referred to counselors and support groups designed to teach them how to cope. It's segregation pure and simple, only now it's a minority group segrating itself from society. And let's not forget this isn't a private school where the homosexual students pay tuition, this is a public, state funded school. The cost of running this "special" school comes out of the pockets of all taxpayers. How is that fair? If they want their own school, it should be a private school that requires them and their families pay a tuition.
What about Gay Rights and FOCA (abortion) then?
hmmmm?
We can legalize Gays and Abortion but prostitution, pot, marijuana etc. (much lesser evils) should be "prosecuted heavily", oh come on .... It's all about "feeling good". If gays 'feel good' with each other and teenage moms 'feel good' to abort then what's your issue with pot or marijuana users? Don't they have a right to feel good with all the economic benefits for government?
He gave up his parental rights; end of story.
x
It is in the not-so-distant past that women had very few rights! (sm)
My mother was sexually abused by her stepfather - it was the 60s - she went to the police and they told her to go home. She ran away from home and they took her back. She told family members and they told her to keep it quiet. She eventually somehow pressed charges and took him to court...and the judge told her to go home and forget about it.
Actually I have a very good tenants' rights BOOK - sm
from Nolo Law. Mentions everything but the kitchen sink - EXCEPT renovation evictions. STILL, now what am I supposed to do when applying for a new apartment? All the applications ask if you've been evicted, and yet having lived here so long, none of my previous landlords is even ALIVE. Do they have to tell a prospective landlord I've been kicked out, even if it wasn't for doing anything wrong (except for living here too long)?
Debbie Rowe's rights are intact -
A judge ruled that there was no psychological evaluation done of her when she gave the kids to Michael and dropped the custody case, so even though she gave up custody, her parental rights were not legally severed.
She will be the one to benefit from this situation unless somebody else pays her off again.
Debbie Rowe's rights are intact -
A judge ruled that there was no psychological evaluation done of her when she gave the kids to Michael and dropped the custody case, so even though she gave up custody, her parental rights were not legally severed.
She will be the one to benefit from this situation unless somebody else pays her off again.
read a Tenants Rights brochure for your answer
nm
Gays march for their rights to be involved with their long-time partners
health care should a drastic decision be made. It is usually a family member...even though we are the ones who take care of our partners when they are sick or dying. We fight for the right not to be thrown out of a shared house by the partner's parents. We want to honor our partner's wishes when they die as we are the ones who have spent years with them - not the family. These are just a few examples.
As far as your comment that we influence young people - that is absurd. All we want is to live our life and as pxmt said, be able to walk down the street without abusive comments, being assaulted, ridiculed, etc.
The school system is not segregating gay children - they are making it "gay friendly and teaching tolerance". Suicide is very high in gay children because of the parents who teach their children that it is evil and it is okay to bash a gay child. These schools are just trying to save the lives of young children.
As far as your comment that Christian's homes and churches are burned, sorry but I cannot recall one incident that I have read or saw on the news. Temples yes. As far as being assaulted for your beliefs, could it be because you stand in front of abortion clinics and gun down the doctors and nurses that come out or go into the clinic? Could it be that you bully the 15 and 16-year-olds who have been raped and want an abortion?
Sorry to say this, at least we (gays) are not violent and just want to be left alone.
Whatever my mother-in-law and mother are cooking--lol
we go to my in-laws for Christmas Eve and usually have ham and kielbasa (we are Polish) and then my mom usually has turkey or roasted chicken on Christmas Day
I agree - a mother is a mother and a daughter is a daughter for life sm
despite the problems they had, which i truly believe stem for anna's drug problems. obviously her mom wasn't too bad or she would not have raised daniel for a while. i think the mother wants her buried in Texas so the grave will be close enough that she can go visit it without having to come up with expenses of going to the bahamas to get there. although i contradict that too in poor anna needs to be buried with her son.
At that rate, I could make in a week what I make
x
I think she said the father did not want her around
so really she should take that same stance. I think you just cannot sometimes may an enabler understand what they are doing wrong. My deceased husband, I talked to him about his enabling with his daughter and he told me he would do until his last breath and he did. She was a total invalid after that, did not have a clue (at 30 something) how to make her way. Oh well, glad I wasn’t the mother.
You ask about my son's father?
The father came around after the son grown and now lives with him. No money ever from him while my son growing up, not a penny, nothing. I have nothing against the father, just always thought he basically did good to take care of himself but not a father figure at all for the son. He was able to work, chose to live on the streets and finally got too old to be out there and my son and his family took him into their home. I was there but people have to understand what money does to people, especially if a lot of money, thousands and thousands. My son was upset about my inheritance and that is what happened. It is sad but not my fault he would choose the love of money over his mother. Wish him well.
your father
This is a touchy subject. Yes, it sounds a little like he may be trying to "take the easy way out" but really, what he is doing is self degradating and really desperate. I believe he needs help. Of course, he is not going to see it or admit it himself. That's WHY he needs help. He has threatened to take his life and spoken of wanting to die. I think you should call 911 or see if your town has a crisis team and tell them that he has said he is going to kill himself. Have him taken by ambulance or let the crisis intervention team figure out the transportation. Once he is at the hospital professionals will evaluate him and decide whether or not he needs to be committed against his will or long term treatment. They will give him counseling and even point him in the direction of how to start managing life again. The worse that could happen is that they say hes fine and send him home (which they will not do without at least providing him with information for outpatient treatment and other local agencies that can help him).
However, how will you feel if, God forbid, he does hurt or kill himself while you thought he wass just bluffing?
And even if it doesnt go that far...he will continue to harass you and your mom.
He needs help of some kind and as his daughter I think you should find a way to help him.
How do you know her father was
there for her? You are assuming that. As far as writing him off, it might be the best thing for her. Toxic people are very dangerous. Obviously you had a story book childhood and until you go through something like that, it is impossible to understand. Because it is a parent, it does not mean you have to put up with emotional and mental abuse.
Father in law
My father in law is an ok guy. One problem. He likes to come to our house and watch TV. On Saturdays and Sundays, I am off work, and I like to relax on the couch in Pjs and watch my TV. My husband drives an 18-wheeler, and a lot of times when he comes in if it is on weekends his dad will come over that morning and sit here ALL day long. My husband said last time you know I love dad to death and like for him to come visit but after a couple hours it is time to leave. Well now my husband isn't at home and he comes over to visit my son who is 11, and tells my son lets watch a movie or something. Well this is my weekend to relax and lay on the couch and watch TV. I feel like I can't relax in my own home. He doesn't have satellite at his house so he wants to sit here and watch. I am so fustrated. He needs to go home. I think he uses the excuse when my husband is gone to come see my son so he can sit here and watch movies. I would like to watch my own TV. URRRGHH! Any advice?
My father in law tried that with his indoor cat
and once they got outside the cat totally flipped out like a crazed wild animal. It was a very scary experience from what he described. So just be careful.
I do not live in 1 but my father had 1 and
when you pull the carpet up as I did when I got the trailer it only had cheap plywood underneath it. Having said this I was going to rent it out as eventually wanted to sell for the land it was on (6+ lake front acreage) so we put down linoleum (spelling?). A trailer is mostly made from the very cheapest you can get, thus the cheaper prices most of the time than homes. We took inexpensive commercial carpet for some of the bedroom floors and hubby put that down. These are about the cheapest you can do, don’t think your idea of a faux finish will work with the plywood but then you can always check on that. By the way, do you have to tar the roof of yours? Most trailers require this- did not know until after I had in possession- the only difference is a regular roof was put on this 1 - most are flat on the top and require tarring.
Actually he is a wonderful father...
who takes time out of his sleep schedule to be with them, eat dinner with us, go to kids' sporting events and the usual things people do without missing a beat because everything works out for their schedule. People who sleep during the night have no clue how hard it is to sleep during the day when it is light out, loud noises outside like lawnmowers, snowblowers, leafblowers, construction and more than you could realize. Nobody schedules meetings at 1:00 am so you have to get up after a few hours. Going to church on Sunday with your family and having family day requires less sleep because he works Sat. and Sun. night.
I feel sorry for you that you can't have an open mind enough to see that not everybody has the same life, same feelings, same jobs. If I can make him more comfortable including having a dark bedroom then I will and I asked for help in achieving this goal, not to have someone who doesn't know him or our family come on here and insult us. Not once did I say this was something he told me to do or makes me do..I am doing it because I love him. If he gets home in time in the mornings he gets the kids ready for school. Marriage is about give and take.
Your father was a 1 in a million.
A lot of men would have left being walked on and demoralized but your dad didn't want to leave you to suffer it alone. Usually, even when a mother isn't fit to raise a goldfish, mothers still get custody of the kids, and that's sad. There are a lot of great dads out there and they really need to be given the praise they deserve. What a great dad you had. I can see why you cherish him so much.
From what I can gather, he has only seen his father twice ....sm
in his entire 11 years. I think his great-grandmother raised him and also raised his mother (which would be her grandmother). Well, I think this lady just recently died and the child came to live with the mother and mother's boyfriend. The mother's 5-year-old lives with his father and I have noticed that the mother has him every other weekend. All of the kids except for 1 are from single-parent homes, including my own. I have been divorced for 5 years. I do not think that should be an excuse though. I am a very involved, hands-on, in tune, on top of things mother and I work my butt off to have what we have. My daughter sees her dad every other weekend sporadically. Yes, it does put a lot of responsibility, worry, etc., on the custodial parent but that is our job, not the neighborhood's job. There is another single mother who lives here and her husband is in jail. Her 2 sons are very well behaved. Then there is this mother and the single mother of the 2 girls who just suck at parenting. You rarely ever see them and they both take "nerve pills" and "sleeping pills." I've just never been that type of person and I have hard time understanding how you can bring children into the world and not take care of them. I don't expect the rest of the neighborhood to raise my daughter. Am I wrong to feel this way?
Father-Daughter
I don't know that one. Now I'm curious and have to look it up and hear it!
Can you talk to your son's father about this?
Can you discuss this amicably if you are on good terms, perhaps approaching it from the angle of what's best for your son.
father/daughter
My take on this whole situation is they are playing us. They probably both knew they were going to be in the house, so I would not take it too seriously.
Child should have father's last name SM
and should see father, unless he was abusive. No matter what a woman may think of the guy, it will be disservice to child to not let him/her see father.
A divorced woman can keep name or change back to maiden. Doesn't matter. I kept my married name, since I had it for 30 years.
My father was also child #5 and
12 years younger than the #4. He was always told he was not an accident but a suprise. I watched Jesus Camp and don't agree with that way of "religon" at all.
You did not mention if a father of your son
is around or involved in any way. I think your first attention should be towards your son, not the BIL because apparently your child is doing some acting out and it tends to escalate. When parents of young children oohing and aahing about them, I think about how it turns like your story now a lot of times. I had somewhat similar bad behavior (although never went against my telling no), some drugs involved. I just told my son would send to my daddys home- would have been worse than prison for him and I knew that- ole timer- early to bed and early to rise, take no junk type person. My son turned around because I always told both my children I did not have time for crap- I had to work and make a living for them and I would never put up with backtalking, walking away and doing what they thought they could so, swearing, hitting or the like.
My father-in-law after many years
was able to figure out his trigger and it is citric acid. He has to read every label because it is a common ingredient.
I'm confused. Who is the father?
x
I was my father's TV "remote"
I was very young and never questioned what my parents said to me and one day I asked my dad why he couldn't get up and change the station on the TV, to which he replied, "Because I have a bone in my leg." Seemed like a logical reason to not have to get up and change the television; until one day it occurred to me that WE ALL HAVE BONES IN OUR LEGS!!!!! I have told my kids about this and they just cannot believe how incredibly DUMB I was. I agree. They still tease me about it and, as unhelpful as that phrase is, we still toss it around in our home. LOL.
We do believe, thanks to Grandma, that every time you get the hiccups, it means you are growing. My kids have asked me on the few occasions when I have had the hiccups, what that means for me and I just tell them when you get older, you don't grow UP, you grow OUT. LOL.
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