Thank you all for your posts! Thanks!
Posted By: MTFORU on 2009-05-27
In Reply to: No One Can Ask You To Leave Your Own Home - Fingers
Not being physically abused here, emotionally I feel like a dog on a leash-- a short one. All this info is like music to my ears. The house is in his name, but I do buy all the food/pay some of the bills -- insurance, internet and I pay for clothes ect for my children. I cannot thank you all enough. I will look into free legal help. I think that is in my state. We always had separate bank accounts so I'm okay there.
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Goldbird
Where did all the posts on this go?!
This was a rather lengthy thread with a lot of feedback and support....but it all has disappeared. I noticed that happened with some other threads as well, like when admin shifts them from one heading to another (like a Word Help question getting posted under the Main Board). That's a drag because a lot of helpful things are getting lost in the shuffle 
According to the above posts, am just
glad it was lotion and nothing else… what about that Ben-Gay? I loved that one.
According to most of these posts
So no matter what means you got pregnant. Abortion is murder. I don't agree with that mentality. I believe in choice no matter what the circumstances.
Thanks everyone for your posts (sm)
I appreciate all of the info as you don't find a lot of the true problems experienced when researching on the net.
I would like not to have surgery, but I don't think my husband would be willing to get a vasectomy. I can't go the hormonal route and have been told I cannot have an IUD as I have never had children. So, I'm pretty much left with the TL option.
Thanks again all for taking the time to respond with such good information for me to consider.
It's right above the posts.....
with the autoimmune link, mental health link etc. It's the last one.
CANNOT SEE POSTS - WHAT IS GOING ON?
Any monitors out here? What is up?
Why do the above 2 posts have to keep up with
their daughter's periods- is that just to make sure you have enough feminine products or just why? Neither my mother nor I ever kept up with mine. Is this a new fad or is it wanting to know if your daughter gets pregnant or just why? Both the posts are really new to me.
Not so, those posts came in after
she posted it. Try again!
You don’t have to say it but your posts
come across strongly as really hoping for them not to go- you said showing them off- I guarantee the majority of grandparents want to show their g'kids off, either in person or in pictures they carry around. This is NOT unusual. Why do you find this strange? You have the undertones of not liking this person. Your children are picking up on this.
Thanks, I appreciate all the posts here
NM
Thanks to all for the posts!
I read each and everyone and cried with each. I know I am still in a sad state just a few months after her death and perhaps I have felt guilty because of the sadness. I do know I tried any and everything I could for her, when she got too weak to make it to the bathroom I carried her and helped her, I spoon fed her with baby food and more caloried kitten food when she was a grown cat, trying to help her regain weight, she was so thin at the end, I was her eyes when she had her stroke earlier which she recovered from and it has hurt me so bad, my heart still aches. I have replayed things in my head like 1 said- time and time again- especially of the fact that I did not hold her when she died- and 1 person said animals lots of time want to go away to die- I know this- but yet when another person on this line said that it helped me think well, ok, she might have wanted to be comfortable and alone - well she was just in the next room from me then. I realize that probably the guilt I have felt is possibly the fact I am still grieving over my loss. Gosh, I never knew a little furgirl would mean so much to me and how I loved her. Another person stated about think about the life I gave her and she probably would not have had- that is true because her mother (when pregnant) came to my door and oh course I let her come in with her babies and my furgirl was born at my home- so see we had been together all those 18 years. My husband got me 2 other brothers furguys and I do love them. I would like in my furgirls honor to adopt another homeless girl from our humane society and hope to do that before long- not to replace- no one can replace her but to give another 1 a good home. Thanks again everyone for the kind words- I really appreciate everyone taking the time to write.
As you can see from all these posts,
it is very important to have a gynecologist skilled in epidurals.
I got my epidural immediately when I came to the hospital and 12 hours later I delivered. The epidural was in there the whole time, probably on a low dose. I had no pain at all. After giving birth I felt bad and I vomited, maybe from the morphine. The nurse kept sitting at my bedside for 2 hours, engaging me in conversations, she told me I should not go to sleep, only after 2 hours, this was a little strange to me.
This what is, the 2nd day I got up and 2 days later I went home. I had never had any bad after effects, no pain on the insertiion point in the spine, no side effects ever. Good doctor.
At my first delivery nobody gave me the option, natural or epidural, I had no idea that epidurals existed, so I delivered without painkillers at all. Had they asked me, though, I would not have accepted the epidural, because it was the first delivery and I had no idea how painful it is.
I remember that I thought to myself that I will never have sex again.
But, ...3 years later I had my daughter, with an epidural.
So, my advice is, take the epidural, but make sure to have a skilled doctor.
I may have been a little harsh in some of my posts
and if so I apologize. I truly do feel bad for you, I have sisters and I know I would be devastated. I hope someday soon you can both put this in the past and make up. I'm sure Thanksgiving may be a bit sad this year for you but I hope you can find some happiness and enjoy the day as best as possible.
These posts come across as not being very professional,
in their jobs, just the opposite. I might (and underline that) throw the clothes in the dryer but what you hear are women crying about what to do with their children, how to do their house chores around their work time- Good golly, what I am saying is I do not think a majority of the MTs on here would be able to hold down a job outside of their home because their home interferes with their work. I say either work at a job, not cry about it or do housework. One post said if inhouse would probably stand around a water fountain, that is a hoot!! No work, no production, no money. So simple.
Not sure what posts are below re marriage
but you sound so very well grounded and truly in love and love your husband and obviously he reciprocates. You are blessed but you also sound like a wonderful person who knows how to compromise when necessary and probably pick your battles - if you even have any!! I am also close to your age and going on 25 years of marriage and watch little things in the marriages of my children and I realize how much I have grown and how truly unimportant some stuff is - but sometimes you just don't see it when you are younger... wisdom definitely come with age!! You are blessed! :))
I have read all of the posts here and --sm
in my opinion, it is time to do what you have to do. She already has feelings against you, so what difference does it make. try to protect her as best as you can. protect your gd first and foremost. Get her some help, for YOUR peace of mind. God knows what you have done to help in your lifetime. Do not worry about your siblings or what anyone else might think. Do what you have to do..it is time. good luck to you, and God bless.
Posts being deleted - SM
Sometimes threads are pruned in order to scoot them back over out of the left-hand margin.
I suggest in the future if you have questions about your posts, e-mail them instead of complaining loudly on the board.
The thread you are referring to was pruned. It had nothing to do with the content of yours or anyone else's post.
Goldbird
I never said that - don't put words into my posts....
no need for sarcastic posts
I said pot.....
all you mentioned is most assuredly highly addictive...
been there, done that - need no lectures from an anonymous sarcastic poster 
I love all the posts concerning the
different marinades but I do believe with the MSG I can tell because of feeling like a sudden weight surge, like your bra gets a little tight and you have to unloosen it. I think this might be what they are talking about but then again I love all these brands, Lawry's included. Marinating the meat in dressings, etc. really helps the taste.
Now that I read your posts..
I'm figuring that's what my problem was. I had a tubal ligation after my third child 15 years ago. I had endometrial ablation done last March because of heavy periods, which was the best thing I ever did. It was to the point that I sometimes had to get up twice a night to change everything. My doctor told me that I might need another ablation sometime down the road or maybe a hysterectomy eventually.
That's okay. Both posts showed up sm
withing seconds of one another. I am so glad your family is okay. This is just awful.
True. But nn's posts often... sm
Come across as negative, bitter, judgemental, abrasive, argumentative, lecturing. This isn't the first time, so there does seem to be a pattern/problem IMHO. Seems like a very unhappy person, spreading that unhappiness around...
I agree with below posts sm
We went to New York this past summer and my drama class son had the time of his life. My daughter has a part time job, she works about 11-15 hours a week (that equals 2 days a week for her) and every 2 weeks she gets a paycheck of about 100.00 to 120.00 dollars a week. She could easily raise the money without taking away to much of her time or yours driving her to and from work. My daughter works as a cashier in a grocery store. I don't think you are being a cheapskate but I would do anything to make sure she could go.
After reading the below posts sm
I have to laugh. I have HP and have no trouble at all. It is the same thing with kitchen appliances. Have mostly GE and am not happy but many surveys say GE is one of the best.
So many posts against my views
but I posted about where I lived, in an association, and many came back against my saying it was so nice here, quiet, no loud music, no bullies to threaten your kids but yet people seemed to think I was being I guess "uppity." I only had 1 problem since 2004 and that was the pit sending flames into the trees next door, unattended, with their wooden area adjoining mine. I stand by what I said but if you are moving, got the perfect place for you. I am so happy here, not like others think an association is. The people here are really nice, not bothersome and we take pride in how we live. Oh, here goes the flaming!!!
These posts are a hoot!
I am so laughing reading about your babies. I just so love these sweet things and would never turn my back on him, even if he swishes when he walks!!
I have not read through all these posts, but
I had a cat pee on my daughter's new bed and was horrified. We got urine gone from wal-mart and that fixed it totally. Hope you find a solution!
Regarding our posts about suffering below (sm)
I am the one who said that I am a Christian but that I don't understand the suffering in the world either. I also disagree with Christians being self-righteous - this article/video shows that Christians and Muslims should be able to live together in harmony and we should all realize that when we become too intellectually/religiously arrogant, we forget the whole point.
http://www.cbn.com/CBNnews/214912.aspx
I can't read posts either...
Can't read posts either!
Thanks you all for the positive posts.
I didn't think anyone would tell me not to let him go and that is exactly what I needed. I guess all along I knew I would not be able to keep him here, my heart would hurt too much to see his heart hurt if I did say no. I know I am supposed to just turn it all over to the Lord, but sometimes that is really hard to do. I will continue praying about it and I know that will help give me some peace. Thanks again to all.
Before I even read the other posts
I understand what you are going through, having been through it TWICE - long story, I refused to be the 'other woman' both times. You have to change the way you think about this man. Maybe your brother did bring him into your life for a reason, to help you grieve and to show you some of the qualities that you want in a man - but at this time, this is not the man for you. It is very difficult to let go. I still wonder sometimes if I did the right thing by walking away, but I could not sleep at night knowing that I destroyed someone's relationship. For history, the first instance was my high school sweetheart. He went into the Army. We wrote letters all the time and talked about marriage. So, imagine my shock when he brought home a woman he'd met while in the Army. I had one conversation with him after that. I asked him if he was happy and he said he didn't know. He couldn't be sure if he'd done the right thing by being with this other person and not me. I KNOW I could've stepped in and he would've left her. But would it have lasted? Would he eventually regret what he'd done? After all, we were different people. So, I told him that I could not talk to him any more. It was too hard. If things didn't work out with this other person, I told him he could call me any time. He is now married to this woman and I pray that he is happy. I made the right choice, as much as it hurt to let go, and that is what you have to do.
I have been reading all these posts sm
and debating on what to say. Bear with me, this could be long. My mother's mother lives in California and has all my life. I live in Virginia. I havew seen my grandmother exactly 5 times and I am now 40. My mother died unexpectedly 3 years ago (she lived here and was extremely close with all her grandchildren). I knew that my mother and grandmother did not have a close relationship but they did love each other. The night before the funeral my father and I had such a long wonderful talk. He told me then that he never ever heard my grandmother say anything positive, not even anything nice to my mother. He wasn't trying to critize my GM but was just stating the facts. Two years ago my parents (dad and stepmother) decided to take each grandchild (4) on a separate vacation. My daughter really wanted to go to CA. Not necessarily to see her great-grandmother but wanted to include that in the trip. My parents asked me to go along. We flew to San Francisco and drove to her home about 3 hours away. Now keep in mind, my GM loves my father and thinks he put the moon and sun in the sky. We were only going to stay in her town over night simply becuase the woman is not enjoyable to be around. She has a very tiny home so we decided to stay in a hotel. My GM asked me if my daughter and I would like to stay with her. I did not want to but my stepmother really thought I should. We arrived and after spending some time at her house trying to show her pictures of the other grandchildren (she really wasn't very interested) we took her to lunch. I tried to talk to her about the likes of my other child as well as my nieces and what there life was like. She just kept interuppting and changing the subject. Mostly about my brother or to talk to my father. As we were leaving the restaurant my SM pulled me aside and said that we should definitely stay at the hotel. My GM has no other family except my brother and I. I still call her every week but the conversations are always the same. No interest in my life. My son's 17th b-day is tomorrow and he got a card from her yesterday. It was pink and covered in flowers. This is not a woman who I want to spend time with and never have for multiple reasons. I could write a book. Please don't "make" your children go. There are obvious reasons in their minds and you should respect that.
Thanks for your posts...yes FAFSA gives some
assistance but not enough, she still needs like $5000 for each semester (this is an Ohio public university)....education sure has gotten expensive, but you have to have it!!! Good Luck DW, stay in school,,if you can find a cosigner, Sallie Mae has what they call a Tuition Answer Loan, (you still need a cosigner) but the check is sent directly to you and the process really isn't bad...but the PROBLEM is getting a cosigner!!!!
After reading some of your posts,
it sounds like maybe he just wants to stay married so he can keep you under his thumb. I'm sure it's better for him financially if you stay together and he has someone to do the household chores as well. As for asking for sex via email, that is creepy. But, I would still wonder whether he is getting somewhere else. I think men would still continue to ask, just on the off-chance that you actually would say yes, but get it somewhere else, too. I'd be afraid of what he could bring home. As for the kids, I agree with the other posters. The kids will pick up on this, but sadly enough, they will grow up believing it's a normal relationship when it's not, thus the generation-after-generation epic of divorce. That's just my opinion, though, and I'm certainly not an expert.
Now, back to you, I'm sorry that you're not getting any with someone who loves and respects you. So often, it is just assumed that the woman doesn't need/desire intimacy, when in all honesty women crave that intimacy even more than men. It's not necessarily the physical aspect of the intimacy that women crave, but rather the emotional. The fact that he asks for it so bluntly via email on a daily basis is his way of degrading you. Don't let it go on any longer. I would be headed straight to the divorce lawyer's office. Many women have been through divorce and made it through okay. You're children will support you once they see how much happier you are without him. Good luck to you. 
Some of these posts unbelievable!
I will say I do believe a 14-year-old is too old for a whipping but having said that, the issue about her writing a report is really silly! I posted below when my son was made to write, I think, 200 times a sentence I shall not (whatever) and when he finisehd, wanted to know could he do that again! Some children actually love to do that- you have to find what they dislike most and that is their punishment. If they love to go to the mall, take it away, if they love their cell, take it away, television, away, movies, away. Frankly I would do an overall taking away everything, leaving them in a blank room for days! Not even writing material, books, etc. This crap about her having trust issues- I was whipped a lot as a child and I am in a wonderful, marvelous marriage. That is pure bunk!!
Completely different posts....
You might want to read again-I was not talking about her meowing then. I am not talking about giving her foods, supplements, now. I am asking about how do you know about end of life. People say you would know and I am asking about her sounding off now. Please review my other post again- I am feeding her kittie cat food and also supplements. This post is entirely different.
Umm.... what exactly is the point of your posts?
.
Thanks for posting. I see a lot of your posts and I think we have a
death would not be sad to someone. I find it all sad, that he had mental issues maybe, depression or just hooked on drugs, but its all sad. Other's misfortune is sad to me.
The posts have gone from DD to DIL to SIL and just thought
would let you know, my ex-son-in-law called me today just to ask how I was doing! I thought that was sweet- well DD and SIL just divorced for a short while, oh about a year or so and I thought they had moved on, yeh, right. She tells me recently trying to lose weight- ex-SIL tells her he will take her to Las Vegas for an added incentive- I asked him today if the same holds true for MIL! Ha. I hold no ill will against this sweetie.
Actually we can all tell which posts are from "you"
x
Happens at other places - certain posts take over for a while
no harm really - gets people involved and more people coming, etc. It's playful - try to enjoy
Did you miss the posts by the
It sounds to me like she did everything right as the OWNER and they still ended up with a dead cat and other potential tragedies. ANY breed (Not just the pit bull, but any breed) with this kind of earned reputation and documented behavior should not be allowed to be bred any longer for any reason in MY opinion. And yes it is that simple. No gray area here as far as I'm concerned.
GP, did the moderator take down all the other posts here? sm
There were a whole bunch of posts having to do wtih cast iron, you and sam being from the same part of the country, etc. If the mod did take them down, why?? I did not see anything out of the ordinary. Or am I missing something obvious?
Here are two more I didn't see in these posts -
A coal chute - We lived in a farmhouse in Iowa and the coal truck would deliver a load of coal down the chute into the basement. Lots of nosie, very exciting! My dad would get up and get the coal furnace stoked and we'd each pick a vent to get dressed in front of when the heat came up.
My first experience with the telephone was at my grandmother's house in Iowa, where you'd pick up the receiver and the operator would say "Number, please" in order to make a call. circa 1956 or so (?). Memories . . .
I think it is a combination of the posts below.
Women being hormonal and strong headed and liking things done a certain way. After all, most stereotypical roles of men/women still exist.
I also think men are generally more passive in relationships. It's just their nature. They would rather do nothing than to be told they did something wrong.
I think society in general does not experience the joy and delight in the small things as much as they used to. With everything being automated, faster, cheaper, better...never content with just a modest day to day life. There is always something to improve.
I think the D-word (divorce) has also become second nature in our world today. It's an easy fix, a way out, an excuse.
I often get annoyed with my husband. He has been married before. In the beginning of our relationship we used the D-word a lot. Not because we meant it but because it was available. I decided one day it was ridiculous and that I would never divorce him. I miss him terribly when he is gone just 1 day. I love him dearly. He just became accessible for me to complain about and to.
Atleast once a year I try to take the time to think of the positive things about my man. They may be big or small, doesn't matter. I make note of them and either mention to him "thank you" or just recently wrote him a note telling him how much I love him and how great these things are. It really makes a huge difference in our relationship. They may not admit it but men need to receive a pat on the back and a boost of esteem once in a while, just like a woman needs to feel loved and special once in a while. It's just our nature I think.
When I read these other posts...
No kidding, Natalie.
Whenever I read the posts from forum members who are trapped in an unhappy, sometimes downright abusive domestic situation, I look over at my boyfriend and silently give thanks for hitting the jackpot with him.
The horror stories I've read on this forum about some of these men make me appreciate every single little thing he does for me (and makes me wish every forum member could find the happiness I was lucky enough to find).
The good ones ARE out there, ladies, they really are. You just have to keep opening up those Pandora's boxes until you unexpectedly come across the buried treasure!!!
All of your previous posts
showed such a concern for those less fortunate and you make a snide comment like that? If you don't need to "eek" or "worry", why are you wasting your time here? Go make some other poor slob's day miserable.
Deleted posts s/m
I've seen several posts that have been deleted over the past few months. Sometimes it is if you mention the "other board" and sometimes it has nothing to do with it. I'd like to know the reason as some of the posts were just posters asking simple questions, no swearing, nothing derogitory, etc. The ones that are moved have an arrow by them.
Okay, after reading the below posts sm
I know the Steelers are playing but who else is playing?
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